T W E L V E
4033 Words
12| C L O S U R E
A few hours earlier...
THE YOUNGEST WINCHESTER walked towards her bathroom and turned the shower on before stripping down bare. She got into the shower and sighed as the warm water cascaded down her body, washing away her impurities. The warm, soothing water mixed with the salty tears that fell from her eyes. The words that escaped Dean's mouth still lingered on her head, almost like a bad aftertaste. She cursed herself for telling them about her suicidal thoughts. She was just angry—so angry that words just started spewing out of her mouth without her consent.
After showering, she changed into her clothes—which consisted of a random t-shirt and her worn out jeans, before tying her hair back into a bun...well she tried to. She leaned against her vanity mirror and took deep breaths.
" Get yourself together, Zenja...", she whispered to herself.
Her mind flashed back to seeing her mother enter the portal with Lucifer, when Crowley sacrificed himslef...when Castiel was murdered by the devil himself.
Her breathing began to quicken as voices filled through her head. Her eyes flashing between green and gold as she tried to get herself together. She kneeled on the floor and breathed heavily.
" no,no,no...", she repeated as her mind unwillingly tuned in to angel radio. The different voices of the angels filling her head. She gasped in pain and grabbed placed her head on her hands. Her abilities always seemed to take control of her whenever she was stressed.
Think, Zen. Think! How do you stop this?
A thought suddenly popped in her head. " f-flowers, r-r-rain, s-smile, f-f-f-family...", she chanted. Castiel had asked her what her favourite things were and told her to say them out loud, it seemed to calm her down when she had the same attack back when they were dealing with the four horsemen. Famine did what it does best and increased her need to use her powers. She was almost caught by her brothers but they were too busy with their problems to actually dig deep into her own.
" f-flowers, rain, s-smile, family...", she repeated as she rocked back and forth. Her racing heart started to calm down and her breathing seemed to go back to normal.
" flowers, rain, smile...family.", she let out a shaky breath as the voices went away. " Lilies, the smell of rain, my brothers smiling, Mom, Dad and Castiel...", she whispers with closed eyes.
As soon as she officially calmed down, she got up from the floor and walked back up to her vanity.
" You're okay...you're fine, Zen.", she states as she stared at her tear stained cheeks on her mirror.
" You're fine..."
>••••••<
THE HUNTERS AND the nephilim soon arrive at the Vallens Family Therapy Studio. They were walking up the stairs when Dean made a comment about the whole plan.
"This is a dumb idea.", He mutters.
" Kinda like you Dean.", Zen snickers.
" What's that supposed to mean?"
She smirks. " Nothing..."
" Now's not the time guys.", Sam sighs. "Just follow my lead."
"Yeah, doctor's gonna eat our liver with some fava beans and a bottle of Chianti.", Dean says sarcastically.
As they walked up the stairs, a man exits the building.
"Hello.", he greets. The brothers ignore him and Zen just smiles.
Jack stops and smiles at the man. "Hello!", he says cheerfully.
The man smiles back at him and Zen awes at his innocence. He almost looked like an exited puppy. They soon enter the building, the walls were white, so was most of the furniture.
"Hello?", Sam says.
The receptionist looks at them and smiles. "Can I help you?"
Zen smiles back at him and replies, "Yeah, we're, uh... hoping to see the doctor."
"Oh, I'm sorry. You caught us right at the end of our day. Maybe tomorrow.", he suggests.
"No, today's good. Like right now.", Dean says with a hard tone and the man looks at him weirdly.
Sam clears his throat. "He—Uh, we just need a moment of her time."
A dark-skinned woman suddenly walks down the stairs. "You've lost someone recently?", she asks.
"No."
"My mother."
Dean and Jack says simultaneously. Dean glared at the nephilim but Jack pays no attention to him and looks up at the woman.
Sam clears his throat. "Uh, our mother. We've having a difficult time."
The woman then rushes to shake their hands. "Mia Vallens.", she introduced.
"Hi. Dean.", Dean greets.
Zenja smiles softly at her and shakes her hand as well. " Zenja.", she greets.
"That's our little brother Jack, and I'm Sam.", Sam says shaking her hand.
Mia hums. "I see. Please, this way."
"Sure.", Sam says and followed after her, as did Zen.
They move towards Mia's studio and her brothers sit on a couch while Jack and Zen sat on separate chairs.
Mia sits in the middle. "Your mother—she passed suddenly?", she asks.
Sam shifts uncomfortably and replies, "Uh, yeah."
She hums. "Mm. Most of the people I see are in the same boat. No warning, no goodbye, no closure."
Zen speaks up. "Right, yeah. Pretty much the same for us. Um... So how does this usually work? You know, with your patients?"
"Usually, they just start talking about the person they've lost.", she replies.
Dean cuts to the chase. "All right, well, Mom was great, now she's dead. What's the deal with catharsis?", he questions.
Mia blinks in surprise. "I'm sorry?"
Zen gives her brother a look while Sam rephrases his sentence. "Uh, we—we were wondering what that is. Um, a patient of yours, Gloria Simon, she referred us. She's a family friend."
Mia frowns. "I don't talk about my patients, and Gloria wasn't supposed to talk about me."
"Sure, um... got it. But your process—"
"My program is a range of things. Talk therapy, meditation. You ever journal?", she asks.
"Our dad did.", Zen replies.
Mia then looks at her older brother. "Dean? You journal?"
"Ever since I was a little girl.", Dean replies sarcastically.
"You think this shrink stuff is a load of crap. Am I right?", Mia muses.
Dean gives her a fake smile. "How'd you guess?"
"Then why are you here?", she questions.
"Because, uh, we all agreed we'd give it a shot, right?", Sam says to both Zen and Jack. Jack nods while Zen gives Dean a look.
Sam shoves Dean. "Right?", Dean smiles forcedly.
Sam sighs. "My brother, he's not, uh, he's not processing his grief."
Mia hums in thought while Dean replies with, "Really? No, I'm—", he chuckles before continuing. "No, I'm good, actually. With death, closure, whole freakin' bottle of Jack."
"Are you?", Sam pressed.
"Yeah. Because I know that Mom's dead, and I know that she's not coming back.", Dean replies. Zen stays silent as she blinks back her tears. She knew her mother wasn't coming back, it just hurt more when she hears it from someone else.
"Okay, I hear what you're saying, I just wish...", Sam trails off.
"You wish he'd be more open to therapy?", Mia finishes.
Sam nods. "Sure. Exactly."
"All right, this is a safe place, right, Doc? Okay. My brother's delusional...", Dean scoffs.
"Dean.", Sam warns.
Dean looks at Sam. "You said you wanted to give this a shot, right? Here we go.", he then looks at Mia. "He won't even admit that Mom's dead. Won't even admit it."
"Stop.", Sam grits his teeth.
"Because if he admits it, then it's real. If it's real, then he has to deal with it, and he can't handle that.", Dean continues.
"Right, because this is so easy for you, uh?", Sam questions.
"No, it's not easy.", Dean replies.
"Yeah, but at least you had a relationship with Mom. I mean, who would she always call? Who did she look to for everything?", Sam raises his voice.
"Okay—"
"You had something with her Zen and I never had! And now we're just supposed to accept that we never will have it?", Sam snaps. He then gets up and leaves the room, slamming the door behind him.
Zen gives Dean a disappointed look before taking off after Sam. She leaves the room and watches as Sam drinks some water.
" You alright?", she asks softly.
Sam finishes up his drink before looking over at her. " Yeah...I'm good.", he replies.
Zen sighs as she looks around the house and spots a sign on the stairs that says: PRIVATE – Please Respect Our Privacy. She then notices a drop of what seems like blood and walks towards it.
" What is it?", Sam asks.
" Look...", She points at the blood. Sam's face hardens and slowly takes out his gun. Zen did the same and walked up tue stairs with Sam following behind. They spot more blood on the railings that lead to the restroom. Zen sees a bloody handprint on the shower curtains and gestures Sam towards it. He slowly hold the curtain while Zen points her gun at the bathtub.
They both nod at each other before Sam pushes the curtain open. Zen grimaces in disgust when she sees the bloody mass of skin, hair and teeth in the tub.
" What the f**k?", She mutters in disgust.
" It all makes sense...", Sam says and it suddenly clicks in her mind.
" Ah shit..."
- Writer
