The Broken Soldier

Five

Marley

"I can do this. I can do this. Just call him and tell him" I stare down at his phone number on the screen trying to talk myself into calling Josh to break up with him. "Marley you are going to burn a trail in the carpet pacing back and forth like that. Hurry up so we can go"

I frown at Zach who is standing at my door. He and my dad have been pushing me to do this all morning and I know I have to, but I don't want to even hear Josh's voice. I smooth my hair back and take a deep breath pressing call. I hold the phone to my ear and wait.

"Hello"

Oh God. "Josh, I need to tell you something and you aren't going to like it, but I don't care. You've hurt me too much and I can't do this anymore. It's over and I don't want to see or hear from you again. Don't come around and don't call me again." I hang up without letting him reply. Nothing he says can make me stay with him. I'm done.

I slide the phone in my back pocket and breathe. "Okay. I did it. Mission accomplished."

"Finally, now let's go, please. I don't want to be late" He groans disappearing from my doorway. I roll my eyes. "Thanks for being so supportive." Letting my sarcasm be known.

We haven't mentioned last night at all and I'm okay with that. I'm not ready to come to terms with the kiss we shared and I don't think Zach is either. Neither of us really know what it meant. Maybe it was just a spur of the moment kind of thing. A lapse of judgment maybe. Who knows. I just know it was nice, but I doubt it's going to happen again. Not that I want it to happen again...or do I? Ugh I don't know. It's all confusing and I honestly don't want to think about it. I make my way downstairs, grabbing my keys off the table. I turn around to yell for Zach and bump right into his chest. "Oh! Sorry" My hands naturally land on his lower chest to stop myself from falling and I feel my face warm. I drop my hands and brush invisible dirt off my shirt not knowing what else to do with my hands, although I can think of a few things that involve his body. I look up at him and he is staring down at me frowning.

"Watch where you're going, short stuff" He mumbles walking past me and out the front door.

Ugh. Kiss or no kiss. He is a jerk.

Zachary

I climb in the truck and watch Marley walk from the house. When I realize my eyes are glue to her short smooth legs, I turn my attention to the sky. I don't need this right now. I just want to go to this therapy session and talk about whatever feelings the doc wants me to.

No conversation sparks during the car ride. Just the sounds of Marley singing country music with the radio. I try to tune her out, but her voice isn't that bad.

Rock me mama like a wagon wheel. Rock me mama anyway you feel. Hey, mama rock me.

"What the hell is this s**t you are listening to?" I ask out of frustration. I am no fan of country music and prefer anything but this.

"It's Darius Rucker" She smiles still looking at the road.

"Kill me now"

Marley points to the car door "Feel free to jump out. I'm doing 50 so that should get the job done"

"Smart ass" I mumble loud enough for her to hear. Although she gets on my nerves, I'm happy to see her smiling and laughing again. It was hard seeing her hurt and hopefully I won't have to see it again. If that Josh kid knows what's best then he won't come around. Maybe I should talk about that in therapy. How I want to beat his ass repeatedly like he has done Marley. Show him what it's like. Never mind, I'm sure the therapist won't interpret my need to kick Josh's ass as heroic. More like mentally unstable. I look over and notice Marley's wavy hair blowing in the wind as she sings to the music. I hold back a smile, but the corner of my mouth twitches. God, what is wrong with me? It's bad enough I kissed her last night. I was caught in a moment of weakness and I feel like it's becoming common for my walls to fall whenever she is around me. I haven't been involved with anyone in a long time so i'm sure that's the reason. Maybe I need to start dating while i'm here, but I doubt any of these girl will understand me like Marley does. No matter how many times my mind tries to cut around the thought of her, It just runs right back into the problem at hand. Marley. I really don't want to think about this right now. I just focus on the scenery for the rest of the ride.

"Phillips" I look up hearing my name called. "Yeah, That's me"

"Dr. Garret will see you now"

I take a deep breath and get up from my seat. I can't lie, I'm a little nervous about sharing me feelings with some stranger who doesn't know me from the next mentally wounded soldier. I look back at Marley whose face is in her phone. Most likely in Twitter or something. Although she doesn't look up she somehow knows I'm looking "I'll be right here when you get out" She mumbles as her thumb types at 100 miles per hour. I follow the nurse to the office and just like in the movies, there indeed is a couch. "Typical" I take a seat and a moment later a woman walks in. "Hi, I'm Dr. Emma Garret" she extends her hand and I shake it quickly. My expressionless face follows her to her seat behind the large desk as he opens what I assume is my file. I'm sure she is going to make pre assumptions about me based on where I'm from and my lack of personal information like an address from before I joined the military.

"So what do you want to talk about, Zachary?" She looks up at me like I'm the one who wanted to come see her and not the other way around. "Uh nothing really. Just been having some weird dreams and stuff."

"Can you tell me about them?" She ask picking up her pen ready to jot down whatever I say. "Nothing crazy. In the dreams I'm back in Iraq under attack. It's the same thing almost every night." I shrug. She scribbles something down and I fight the urge to ask her what she wrote. "Okay and tell me about your episodes while you're awake"

"Usually something drops or makes a loud noise and it takes me back. I have tackled Marley and-"

"Marley?" She interrupts

"Uh yeah. I'm living with my colonel and his daughter, Marley"

She writes something else down and it starts to get on my nerves. Why does Marley matter in this?

"Tell me about Marley. Do you get along with her?"

I shrug "She is 19 and annoying as hell. Always invading my space trying to bond or whatever. We put up with each other. She usually brings me down from my episodes if she is around"

She makes a "mmhmm" noise and I raise an eyebrow. What the hell was that for?

The rest of the session she gives me a few methods to control my lashing out and stuff. I didn't really see the importance or this, but I agree to come back next month for an update. I make my follow up appointment and return to the waiting room. I look around and Marley is no where to be found. I look outside and see her outside standing against her truck on the phone. I walk out into the humid air "Let's go"

Marley hangs up and looks at me funny "What?" I say stopping before opening the car door. "We can't go home" She mumbles and I don't need to know the reason why. I know he is there. Apparently he doesn't know what's best for him. "Lets go, Marley. He isn't going to put his hands on you. Trust me" I climb in the truck and she follows slowly. I catch a glimpse of her shaking hand and I know she is scared. I promised her that this Josh kid wouldn't do s**t to her and I intend to keep that promise. On the way back to the house Marley drives 5 miles under the speed limit on purpose prolonging the car ride. We hit the dirt road leading to her drive way and I see a car in the yard. My fist balls up naturally ready to beat his face in.

"Zach" Marley mumbles.

"Don't worry. I got you." As soon as she cuts the truck off, I get out and stand against the bed of the truck. Marley walks around slowly "Josh what are you doing here? I told you I didn't want to see you again" I watch as he reaches in his car and pulls out flowers "I know you were just upset. I brought these to apologize." He eyes me and takes a step forward. He extends his arm to give the flowers to Marley but she doesn't take them. "You need to leave now. I don't want to be with you anymore"

I see his jaw clench "I know you don't mean that Mar. You know I'm sorry, baby." He reach for her hand, but she slaps it away. I can tell it is taking all her strength to stand as close as she is standing to him. I'm trying to remain composed as I see him repeatedly clench his jaw in obvious anger. "Mar, stop playing. I said I was sorry" He grabs her hand and she pulls away again.

I'm tired of watching this "Kid, I think you need to leave. She doesn't want to be with you."

Josh nods "Mind your business. This is between me and Marley" I stop leaning on the truck and step forward causing Marley to step in front of me. I step forward placing my hand on her unbruised side to move her, but she doesn't budge. I just want to get my hands on him. I'm tired of this arrogant ass boy thinking he can put his hands on anyone. "Let em loose, Mar. Clearly, he wants something"

"Leave now, Josh before I call the cops." Marley says. I can hear the fear in her voice. Josh steps forward and tries to move Marley, but she slaps his hand away again. I'm fed up with this kid. "Marley, Move" I mumble. She turns toward me and puts her hands on my chest "No. I'm not moving. You don't have to do this" As I listen to her, I don't take my eyes off him. "Marley, Just move please. Let me handle this"

"You heard him Mar, move." Josh reaches forward gripping Marley by the back of her shirt, pulling her out of the way causing her to fall to the ground.

I black out.

Marley

"Zach stop!" I hurry off the ground but can't stop him. Zach continues to punch Josh over and over. I can only stand there and watch. The moment josh pulled me down I saw Zach's eyes darken with anger. He has been waiting to do this for all week and I don't blame him. If I had the strength, I would have done it myself. Zach picks Josh up by his shirt and throws him into the side of his car. I'm standing there nearly in tears when I see my dad's car pull up. He doesn't come all the way up the drive way, he just cuts the car off and runs the rest of the way. Before he can grab Zach, Zach lays one last punch to Josh's face knocking him into the ground. My dad pulls Zach back falling to the ground in the process. Zach fights to get back at Josh but my dad holds him back. My heart is beating a million miles an hour and tears begin to pool over onto my cheeks.

"Josh" I whisper as he lays there breathing hard with blood flowing from his nose and lip onto his shirt. My dad sees me take a step towards him and yells "Marley no! Don't you dare! He got what was coming, now let him be."

Josh gets up and grabs his keys off the ground. He stumbles to his feet and gets in his car. The sad pathetic part of me wants to make sure he is okay but I can't because he has never given me enough respect to do the same when he hit me in the past. He just let me go on about my day nursing my own wounds. As he drives off my chest starts to hurt as my breathing becomes uneven. I rub my forehead and pace in a small circle trying to pull myself together. Tears overflow onto my face and my head begins to spin. I fall to my knees and my dad rushes over to me. He wraps his arms around me tight "It's okay, Marley. It's over. you're okay sweetie." I cry into his chest and when I look up I see Zach sitting in the same spot looking at me. I wipe my eyes and stand up making an attempt to pull myself together.

As I walk into the house, I hear my dad tell Zach that he did good. Leave it to military men to praise each other for kicking ass. I go into the hallway bathroom and throw water on my face. I stands there for a moment as the images of Zach hitting Josh. I shut my eyes and shake my head trying make it disappear. I hear a knock on the door and expect it to be my dad "I'm fine, dad. I just need a minute"

"It's me, Marley" Zach mumbles.

I open the door and his face falls when he sees my beet red face. "I'm fine" I bite my lip holding back the tears "I swear I'm fine" I wipe my eyes quickly and I don't know what comes over me next but I wrap my arms around Zach and hug him. I feel his body stiffen then slowly relax. "Thank you, Zach" I mumble into his shirt.

I take a deep breath and finally stop crying long enough to notice that his hand is bleeding. "Zach, your hands" He shakes his head "It's nothing" I tell him to sit on the toilet as I grab a wash towel, wetting it with warm water. I dab the blood away becoming so focused in cleaning his wounds I barely notice that his eyes never leave me. I spray wound disinfectant on his hands and he flinches. I raise and eyebrow at him. He looks at me and frowns "What? It burned"

"Just barely" I smile. I find it funny that he barely found his gun shot wounds painful but a little disinfectant and he turns into a toddler. "Zach, do you remember what happened?"

"Not really. It's sort of in flashes of images here and there. I just kind of blacked out when he pulled you to the ground. I was fed up with him putting his hands on you like that. I lost it" I look up from his hands and his eyes are on me. My breath hitches as his dark eyes burn into mine. I quickly clear my throat "All done" He flexes his fingers and standing. "Thanks". I put the first aid kit back under the sink and when I turn around to leave Zach's chest is there yet again for me to bump into. "You really have to stop doing that" I mutter. I brush my hair back as he looks down at me. "Yes?" I say raising an eyebrow.

"I want to go fishing again, if you don't mind"

I can't help but smile "It's dark out so we will have to wait till morning but I was planning on pulling out the fire pit. Wanna join?" He nods and walks to the kitchen. It throws me off a little that Zach actually wants to spend time with me instead of me trying to entertain him against his will. I grab a blanket from the hall closet since tonight is one of the few cool nights of summer and tuck a bag of giant marshmallows under my arm. I fire up the pit in the back yard by the log bench my dad made a few summers ago and Zach comes out. When he sits I hand him a stick with a marshmallow on it. I plug my phone into a small speaker and play 'Demons' By Imagine Dragons on low. Zach nods is head approving of my song choice. "I don't listen to country all the time" He snorts focusing on his marshmallow over the fire. A cool breeze blows and I catch a chill. Zach looks over passing me his stick "Hold this" I take the stick as he grabs the blanket throwing it over our shoulders. His arm brushes over mine as he grabs his stick placing it back over the fire. "So what made you want I go fishing all of a sudden?" I ask.

Zach shrugs "I wasn't that bad. I kind of want to prove that I can catch something bigger than I did the first time" He laughs. "Well you have your work cut out for you. That fish you caught was huge" I hold out my hand overly measuring the little fish he pulled from the water that day. He bumps me with his shoulder "Really funny. Are you always this sarcastic?"

"It's the way of life. Sarcasm comes naturally to me." I shrug.

"Yea so does that accent" He mumbles and I smack his arm "Don't make fun of the way I talk! Such a jerk" Zach laughs with me and it's almost like we have been friends for a long time. "Yeah well being a jerk comes naturally to me" He turns and looks at me as the fire flickers softly in front of us. His dark eyes burn into mine and the small reflection of the fire in his eyes only make them more captivating. 'Stay the Night' By Zedd plays softly and I smile looking down to break the eye contact. I turn back to the fire and see that my marshmallow has caught of fire "Oh crap!" I pull the stick back and blow on it till it goes out. Zach laughs at me and I nudge him making him laugh more. I touch the marshmallow and feel that it's warm. A chuck of it sticks to my finger and while Zach continues to laugh I take my finger and smear the marshmallow on the side of his face. He stops laugh and looks at me wide eyed "Yeah, laugh at that" I smirk

With his thumb he wipes some on the marshmallow from his cheek and smears it on my cheek. I frown and the corner of his mouth turns up "Do you really want to go there, Zach? Don't start something you can't finish" He take his index finger and wipes the marshmallow from my cheek and licks his finger "Nope. I don't want to feel the wrath of Marley" He rolls his eyes. I wipe the smeared remains of the marshmallow off his face and follow his lead, licking my thumb and index finger of the sweet stickiness. I look up at him and he eyes my mouth. He reaches out and with his thumb wipes the bottom of my lip "Left over marshmallow" He mumbles licking his thumb. I lick my bottom lip and hold back a smile. Being around the laid back side of Zach makes me feel like he trusts me. Like he lets his guard down. I feel safe around him and calm and a whole list of other emotions. I feel like everything is alright when I'm by his side. None of my problems matter when I'm talking to him.

Around midnight we head back into the house and go our separate ways into our rooms. I make my way to the bathroom and shower quickly. When I get out, I wrap the towel around me and start brushing my teeth. I barely get started when there is a knock at the door. I answer letting out a cloud of steam to see a shirtless Zach standing there "Will you be long?"

Speak Marley "Uh no. Just brushing my teeth. I'll be quick" Zach walks in "No need to rush" He hangs his towel on the holder and steps into the shower pulling the curtain closed. From the mirror I see him throw his khaki shorts and boxers out of the shower before turning the water on. I stare at the shower in the mirror still brushing the same bottom teeth I was brushing 30 seconds ago, too consumed by his presence to focus on my oral hygiene. I snap out of my trance and finish brushing my teeth. I got back to my room and slip on a pair of old volleyball shorts from high school and a tank top. I towel dry my hair and pull it into a messy bun before climbing into bed. I put my phone on the dock and start playing 'Wanted' by Hunter Hayes. I turn the volume down till it's playing softly and throw the covers over me.

Zachary

Sleep doesn't come easy as all I think about is Marley. I plug my earplugs into my ear and put my iPod on shuffle. The first song that plays is a James Blake song. I lay there picturing Marley's lips on mine. I roll over trying to kill the imagery but it doesn't help. How can I want someone so tiny and annoying? Although her smart mouth is quite humorous to me at times. I throw the sheets off me in frustration. I pick up my phone up and look at the time. I groan at the facts it's almost 2am and I can't sleep because Marley is on my brain. I don't know what possessed me to touch her bottom lip earlier but I wanted to kiss her so bad. A part of me wonders why I didn't. She is clearly not like other girls. She has been through things most 19 year olds know nothing about and still manages to be happy about life. She balances me in a way that I can't explain completely. I'm not a joker or anything but I can't help but be playful in her company. After beating the s**t out of Josh, sitting by that fire with her was exactly what I needed to ease my nerves.

"f**k it" I stand up and walk across the hall. As I'm about to knock on her door, it opens and her tired face stares up at me in shock. "what are you doing, Zach?" She looks confused "I could ask the same thing" I mutter.

"Well I'm going to get some water" She holds up a cup. I run my fingers through my hair clearly embarrassed for some reason. She continues to stand there looking up at me. "Couldn't sleep?" she asks. I chuckle "Not at all"

She smiles "Me either" She walks past me and heads to the bathroom. If I don't do this now I never will. I catch her arm and pull her back to me. Leaning down I cup her face gently and kiss her. After a second, she starts kissing back parting her lips. I flick my tongue over her bottom lip and she moans softly before abruptly pulling back. She bumps into the wall behind her breathing deeply. I want to slam my lips into hers again but I don't. Marley's soft eyes stare into mine as she bite her lip hard.

"Zach" is all she can say.