The change ( his mate)

Chapter 10: Heartbreaker

Lara

I was so happy, a feeling I feared I’d never feel. I’d dated guys, kissed and done a few things, but not really because I’d wanted to, but because I’d been stupidly naive and thought if I gave in to the things they pestered me for that they’d love me, that we’d have a loving relationship.

I soon found out that I was entirely wrong, once they got what they wanted they would disappear on me. I was happy I’d not given my virginity away, what my karate instructor had done didn’t count to me. Grayson was the one I gave myself to and I was so happy, he had been so patient and gentle with me, let me take the lead and decide how far I wanted to go.

I was meeting him today, it was a Saturday and we’d planned to go to the movies and eat out after.

Knowing I didn’t have to worry about my looks with Grayson, I only applied a little bit of makeup, some soft eyeshadow, mascara and a little nude brown lipstick.

I was in my jeans and a white t-shirt and slipped my trainers on when the door knocked. I had a bell, but Grayson was the only one who ever knocked, so I knew it was him.

I swung the door open grinning at him and threw myself in his arms. He wrapped his arms around me catching us both before we toppled backwards. He held me so tightly like he never wanted to let go and when he pulled back his blue eyes traveled over my face as if he were committing it to memory, he gently stroked my cheek with the back of his finger and said, “I love you, Lara.”

“I love you too,” I smiled.

He didn’t smile back, but I didn’t think much of it as he took my hand and walked me to his car.

He held my hand as he drove and every so often he looked over at me. He seemed quieter than usual and after the movie we ate in silence. “Are you ok?” I asked.

“Yeah, I’m alright,” he tried to smile, but it didn’t reach his eyes.

“You seem quiet today.”

“I’m fine.” His tone was a little colder that time.

“You’re being weird, what’s going on?”

He shrugged and wouldn’t look at me which really hurt.

“Talk to me Grayson, whats wrong?”

He looked uncomfortable, like he was dreading having to say the next words which had my heart race with panic.

“I’m just not sure this is going to work out between us.” He mumbled the words so low I almost didn’t hear him.

“What?” I asked.

He sat back and folded his arms.

“So you don’t want me? You’re breaking up with me?” I asked.

He shrugged and nodded, not making eye contact.

I tried to hold my tears in, I didn’t want to cry in public. I should have seen this coming, I give myself to a man and he tosses me away once he’s done with me.

A tear escaped me and fell down my cheek, I quickly wiped it away, but he looked up at me and reached out as if he wanted to comfort me, he stopped himself at the last second and said, “don’t cry, please don’t cry.”

The waitress came over to take our plates and batted her eyes at him. “Can I get you anything else?” She asked in her best sultry voice.

His lip curled and he looked at her with contempt, a look I’d seen him give a dozen times, but never towards me, I prayed he wouldn’t look at me like that, I’d break if he did.

The waitresses face dropped and she quickly rushed off to get the bill. I breathed a silent sigh of relief when he didn’t turn that hateful gaze on me. The love was gone from his eyes, he looked cold and unreadable, but I could survive that.

I went to get my card out and pay, but Grayson shoved his card at the waitress before I could.

He stood up and I followed him outside, tears falling down my cheeks silently, I didn’t want to cry in front of him, or anyone, but I couldn’t stop myself. I really loved him so much and I thought he loved me, I felt so stupid.

I started walking down the road while he walked to the car, realising I wasn’t behind him he ran to catch up and grabbed my arm stopping me. I yanked my arm out of his grasp and hated how teary my voice sounded. “I’ll walk home.”

“It’s a two mile walk, I’m not letting you walk home alone, I’ll drive you.”

“No.”

“Darling, please, you can’t be walking around alone while somethings going around killing people.”

“I don’t care,” I snapped and kept walking.

“Please don’t say that, if anything ever happened to you I’d—”

“You’d what?! You don’t care about me.”

“I do care about you, darling—”

“Don’t darling me! I’m nothing to you, you got what you wanted from me so just go!” I cried and felt so embarrassed when another couple walking by stared at us.

I tried to storm off, but he blocked my path, I was so heartbroken and angry and sad that I lashed out and hit him in the chest, he didn’t budge an inch. “Move!”

“No, you can hate me all you want, but I’m not letting you walk alone, I’m driving you or I’m walking with you.”

I kept walking, so he followed me, I thought he’d give up, but he didn’t, he left his car outside the restaurant and walked the two whole miles with me knowing he’d have to walk back to get his car.

I was too angry and hurt to care about him right then and opening my door I stormed in and without a word or even looking back I slammed the door in his face. Being the empathic person that I was I felt guilty as soon as I did.

I peeked out the window and saw him just standing there at the door, head down. He turned around and started walking down the street then punched the wall to his right, so hard I don’t know how he didn’t break his hand. My eyes grew wide when I saw the c.rack in the wall, a brick wall and I watched as it crumbled, spider web c.racks running along. His fist was bleeding heavily, but he acted like he felt nothing and he carried on walking.

How dare he act like he was the hurt one when he’d broken up with me! Over the next few days I was in hell, I went from being angry to sobbing my heart out, to wanting to block and delete him from my phone to wanting to reach out and call him, beg him to take me back, I never did, I had always been too stubborn, I’d never give him the satisfaction.

I knew I had daddy issues, my father had never shown me love, he had always been strict and cruel, acted like he hated me, as I grew up I found myself trying to find love from other men, I’d do whatever I could to make them happy, to make them love me, it never worked and I wondered if there was something wrong with me.

I thought I’d finally found what I’d been looking for in Grayson, someone to love me, someone I was starting to trust, thought finally someone wanted me and wouldn’t abandon me.

I cried so much I couldn’t even bring myself to get out of bed and go to work. I missed a whole week of work and college before I was able to force myself to go. On my way to college I wondered if Grayson would be there, I both didn’t want to see him and desperately wanted to. Against my wishes my damn heart started hammering with anticipation at the thought of seeing him.

When I arrived my heart sank to see his table empty. The class was a blur, I heard nothing of the lesson, lost in my thoughts. At the end of class one of the blondes asked Mrs Beaton where Grayson was.

“Oh, he decided to quit his course, shame, but I’m sure he has his reasons.”

My heart sank even more and I managed to hold my tears in until I got outside and was alone.

Stupid Grayson, screw him, I didn’t care. I tried to tell myself that, but I didn’t believe it for a second, the pain wouldn’t let me.

I was crossing the road to the bus stop, the police had caught a stray dog a few weeks back and thought it was the one that had been attacking people, so the bus stop was free to use again.

I was almost fully across the road when a growl sounded behind me. It sent shivers down my spine. Very slowly I turned around to see a wolf, the biggest damned wolf I’d ever seen. Its jet black fur was blowing in the breeze, its hackles raised as its dark brown eyes stared into mine menacingly.

I quickly broke eye contact, I knew not to challenge it by staring back. I lowered my body but not too low, I didn’t want to submit to the point it thought I’d be easy pickings. I backed up slowly and it followed me, snarling, spittle dripping down from the sharp fangs it bared at me.

I couldn’t run, I knew I’d be dead, it’d be game over as soon as I did. I kept walking slowly, keeping my eyes on its forehead and not directly making eye contact. I had walked a few paces before I realised I was walking back into the woods behind me. Oh c.rap. The second it took me to flick my gaze at my surroundings was all it took for the wolf to lunge. Screaming, I fell back raising my hands up to protect myself. It bit my hand then jumped away and ran off.

I was so confused, why didn’t it finish me off? Maybe something had spooked it, I guess I was right because I heard rustling in the bushes, coming towards me until a wolf ran out from them and stood in front of me.

It was huge like the one that had just bitten me, bigger than a normal wolf should be. A mixed breed perhaps? It looked full wolf to me. This wolf was a beautiful white one with a streak of gold along its spine. Its blue eyes met mine and I could have sworn I knew those eyes, I’d seen those eyes before.

The wolf padded over to me and I flinched, bracing myself for an attack. It snuffled my hand, nudging it and I slowly lifted my hand. “What’s up beautiful? You want to be stroked?” I smiled, forgetting for a moment about the bite and the danger I was in.

I ran my fingers through the wolf’s fur, he or she felt so soft. The wolf snuffled my hand again and began licking the wound, I yelped and pulled my hand back when he nipped my wound making it bleed heavily.

Getting up I tried to run, but in my panic I stupidly ran further into the woods. I looked down at my hand, it was bloody, but there was no weeping or sign of infection…except for the fact it had swollen to twice its normal size and was an angry red. That was fast. How fast did rabies infect? I kept running and tripped over a tree branch. Keep running.

I looked back and saw the wolf following me, but not chasing, that scared me, did it know something I didn’t? I’d watched enough animal shows to know that they would follow and stalk their prey if it was old or dying, knowing they simply had to wait it out.

I was sweating, dripping with sweat, my eyes grew unfocused and everything seemed hazy and distorted, I was dizzy, and tired, i blinked, kept running, dots danced before my eyes, blinked again, the blind spots only got worse and then I felt like I was floating on air, I crashed to the ground and everything went black.