When Blue Descends

CHAPTER 33

"Achooo!"

Hatsing ni Jaxen sa pang-ilang beses na ngayon kaya naman kinuha ko iyong panyo ko sa bulsa ko na hindi ko pa nagagamit simula kahapon dahil hindi ko naman kinailangan. Naglakad ako papalapit sa kaniya na nakasandal sa may bintana habang nakatanaw sa labas at naghihintay na mayroong dumaan na estudyante saka inabot sa kaniya iyong panyo ko na ikinalingon niya sa akin at ikinakunot ng noo.

"Oh, takpan mo muna ilong mo. Ina-allergy ka na," sabi ko sa kaniya.

Tinanggap niya naman iyong panyo ko saka niya ipinantakip sa ilong niya.

"Thank you," saad niya saka muling lumingon sa bintana.

Namumula na iyong ilong niya habang iyong mga mata niya naman ay mapungay na tanda na mabigat na iyong nararamdaman niya at baka kaya nananahimik na siya. Pinagbubuksan ko naman iyong ibang bintana makahinga naman siya kahit papaano ng hindi alikabok.

Kinuha ko naman iyong phone ko matapos buksan iyong mga bintana saka hinanap sa social media iyong accounts ng mga kasama namin sa student council nang ma-message ko sila at mapuntahan nila kami rito.

"Ayy, ang galing," nasabi ko nalang nang biglang mamatay iyong phone dahil kahapon ko pa ito hindi ni-charge dahil gusto ko rin talaga sana ito ma-lowbatt dahil ayoko nga sana ng kausap.

"Why?" He asked almost whispering with his voice growing husky.

"Lowbatt na phone ko, did you bring your phone?" I asked.

He then answered by shaking his head as he closes his eyes.

"Hindi ko dinadala phone ko kapag kasama kita," he uttered as he opens his eyes and stares directly at me making me furrow my eyebrows.

"Because I always assume that your battery percentage is full," he said as the corner of his lips faintly raises.

"Stupid," I utter in disbelief as I turn my back at him and walk towards the door's direction.

I then saw a wire lying near the door which reminds me of those cliché scenes in a movie where they use wires if they are trapped in a room. I titter and pick up the wire as I kneel and tried putting it in the broken doorknob.

“Who’s stupid?” I heard Jaxen asked followed by the sound of his footsteps coming in my direction.

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” he asked as he bends over beside me.

“Uhh… I don’t. Clearly, right?” I answered and gave up.

“You should try opening this door. Marunong ka, hindi ba?” saad ko.

“That’s a different knob,” he said as he pointed at the doorknob.

I then look at the normal yet old-looking doorknob and look back at him.

“The doorknob in the control room is different,” he said as he understands my stare.

“So, you can’t open this?” I ask as I showed a taunting expression on my face.

“Of course, I can,” he said as he brushes his hair away from his face followed by his Adam’s apple moving up and down.

I take a step forward to give way to him making him snicker.

“Watch and learn,” he said with no confidence in his voice making me laugh. I heard him chuckle as he keeps playing with the knob.

I just lean on the table as I let my arms rest against my chest watching him completely do anything. He then looked at his wristwatch and uttered a tsk.

“In 5 minutes, our next class will start,” he said as he aggressively wiggles the knob.

Hinayaan ko nalang siya sa ginagawa niya saka inilibot na lang iyong paningin ko at nag-iisip kung paano kami makakalabas sa maalikabok na kuwartong ‘to.

“Sh*t”

Narinig ko iyong bulong ni Jaxen kaya naman napalingon ako sa kaniya at Nakita siyang hawak iyong palad niya na ngayon ay dumudugo na. hindi ko naman maiwasang panlakihan ng mata at lumapit sa kaniya.

“Anong nangyri? Okay ka lang ba?” tanong ko saka inabot iyong sugatan niyang kamay at ipinaabot sa kaniya iyong panyo ko.

“Sira iyong doorknob, nahiwa iyong palad ko,” sagot niya.

Inakay ko naman siya papunta sa isang upuan saka pinaupo roon. Tinignan ko naman nang mabuti iyong sugat niya at nakitang nasa dalawang pulgada iyong haba ng sugat niya kaya naman napangiwi ako.

“Masaki ba?” tanong ko saka tinitigan parin iyong sugat niyang puro dugo.

“How can you f*cking stare at it bleeding?” he asked without answering my question.

I then lift my gaze to his eyes full of confusion instead of what he feels about his wound. Does he look like he’s been messed up by the idea of me being fine with blood? Or is it even deeper?

“It’s just blood,” I simply answered.

I then tried wiping the blood off his palm gently minding that he might be hurt—well, he must be though.

“Aray, lumapit ka kaya?” he complained as he pulls me to stand between his parted legs in front of him by his non-injured hand.

I didn’t manage to utter any word as I am awkward standing between his parted legs. I cannot just move on from last night. The thought of us going to school together with three hickeys still on my neck—not even covered by anything is enough to make me feel all sorts of feelings in my stomach.

I shut my eyes close as I can already feel the warm rubescent halo forming around my cheeks. I am pretty sure that once I open my eyes, I will be meeting his gaze.

“The new tattoos on your neck look good on you,” he commented which sounds like he said that with a faint smirk on his lips.

I then opened my eyes, I was right, he’s staring at me with a smirk drawn on his lips. I bit my lips refraining myself from smiling. I shouldn’t be smiling. What if someone already saw my hickeys and made an issue about it? God damn it, I should have bought a concealer on our way here. Stupid, Khatalina.

“Perfect match to your flamingo,” he added as he titters making me shake my head in response.

I then gently pressed my handkerchief against his palm and wrapped it around his hand as we don’t have anything in this room to tend his wound. He then took a deep breath as he rests his left hand on his lap and pushes his head back to look at the ceiling.

My eyes then darted on his lips as he bites it making me bring my palms on my face and turn my back at him. I was about to walk away from him but didn’t continue when I felt his left hand wrap my waist throwing a huge jolt and tingling sensation in my whole spine. I almost forgot to breathe as I know how my body will react to his touches since I still haven’t moved on from what happened last night.

I then bring my hand to his hand and hold onto it firmly and push it away from my waist and looks back at him.

“What do you want?” I asked.

He then smirks as he leans back comfortably to the chair while staring at me.

“You feel it too?” he asked as his expression changes into a serious one.

I then blink a couple of times as I am processing what he just said while asking myself if I understood what he meant correctly.

“You do. Admit it,” he said as he stands up and took a step closer to me leaving an inch space between us.

I remained calm despite the aggressive beating of my heart as I stare at him. He’s looking straight down to my eyes as he lifts his injured hand and moves my hair away from my neck. His thumb then touches my neck where he planted his kisses.

“I don’t,” I said making his stare pan up to my eyes.

His jaw clenched but manages not to say anything as he revokes his gaze lightly nodding his head.

“Alright, I’m sorry,” he said as he looks back at me with a genuine distressed expression painted on his eyes.

“You don’t have to say sorry,” I said.

“From last night,” he added making me titter for a second.

“Yeah, you don’t. I enjoyed it. I didn’t stop you, right?” I said assuring him that I am fine and doesn’t have to feel bad about himself.

He then smiles wide.

“So, you did feel it,” he said answering his question earlier.

Napaiwas naman ako ng tingin sa kaniya. Ayoko aminin sa kaniya na apektado ako sa kung ano mang nangyayari sa pagitan naming dalawa lalo na kagabi. Malinaw naman na maayos at nagustuhan ko iyong nangyari. Kaya nga hindi siya nakarinig sa akin ng anumang pagmamaktol. But there is something in me that I do want to talk about it but somehow, I cannot.

Napatawa naman siya nang bahagya saka ako nilapitan. Hinawakan niya ako sa magkabilang braso saka niya ako ipinatingin sa mukha niya.

“Tayo lang nandito, why can’t you be honest? What’s stopping you?” he asked.

To be honest, at this point I am not quite sure what even are we talking about.

“What do you want to hear from me?” I asked.

“Is it just… lust?” he asked as his last word became almost inaudible making me look in a different direction.

“With what? With what happened last night?” I asked because I want our conversation to be lucid.

“Everything,” he said staring intensely into my eyes.

“Yeah—I mean, of course, probably, there’s lust but I am not quite sure if that’s what you want to hear?”

I can clearly see the transition of curiosity changing into pain drawn in his eyes.

“You know what I want to hear,” he said as he brushes his fingers against his hair and walk past beside me.

Dinig ko ang matulin niyang pagbunto ng hininga kasabay ng napakalakas na tunong ng pagbukas ng pinto kaya naman napalingon ako roon at nakitang sira na iyong pinto at nakabukas na ikinakunot ng noo ko. Namulsa naman siya saka renteng lumabas na ng pinto na para bang hindi niya sinira iyong pinto namg sipain niya ito nang pagkalakas-lakas.

Hindi naman niya na ako hinintay at naglakad na ng tuluyan palabas ng kuwarto. Napakamot nalang ako ng pisngi salaa naglakad narin palabas ng kuwarto at sinundan siya. Mabilis lang siyang naglalakad dahilan para mapatingin ako sa sirang pinto na yupi na iyong sa parte ng doorknob. Muli akong napatingin kay Jaxen na nakapamulsa pa at naglalakad pa rin at palayo na nang palayo sa akin.

“Jax!” sigaw ko sa kaniya dahilan para mapahinto siya at lingunin ako.

“What?” tanong naman niya sa akin nang hindi gumagalaw dahilan para makaramdam ako ng kakaibang pakiramdam sa dibdib ko.

Walang katiting na emosyon ang nakabalot sa kaniyang mga mata na siyang nagpaaalala sa akin na masyado na siguro akong nagiging kumportable sa kaniya at baka humantong pa ang mga bagay sa ayokong mangyari. Napakagat naman ako ng aking labi saka huminga nang malalim. Itinuro ko naman iyong pinto dahilan para doon siya mapatingi saka dahan-dahang tumango.

“Ako na bahala riyan. Tara na, may klase pa tayo, remember?” paalala niya saka iwinagayway iyong kamay niya at inaya na akong sumabay sa kaniya kaya naman naglakad na ako papalapit sa kaniya.

Nanahimik na lang ako buong paglalakad namin papunta ng classroom namin. I suddenly don’t feel like talking to anybody at some point.

Napatitig alang ako sa katabi kong bintana nang makaupo ako at magsmula narin ang klase. Hindi ko magawang makinig sa klase habang nakikita ko siyang katabi ko mula sa peripheral vision ko. Bahala na, mag-aaral nalang ulit ako mamaya about sa kung anong lesson mayroon kami na ngayon ay kasalukuyang tinatalakay.

“Now, Daimian likes Cazandra from the beginning yet manages to never tell it until he saw her with another man. Why do you guys think people have to wait and see their loved one have fun with someone else just to address their feelings and admit it to themselves?”

My forehead immediately wrinkled as I hear one of my block mates who’s currently reporting her work asked to us.

I then lean on my sit trying to be comfortable without breaking my gaze at the peaceful swaying of trees around the university.

“Mr. Caztillano”

Right now, I am not concerned about anything they are discussing. I don’t even know why we have this topic in this class. As my mind tries to avoid thinking about what I feel in my chest, the thought of CLAW ditching me in our first meeting once again came up. My heart is aching.

“Can you answer my question? Why do you think people do that?”

But I can’t just let myself feel this way or else my employees will feel the same and might doubt their capabilities to push our company to the top. We’re almost on the peek. But we never really pushed hard to be on top as I don’t think I am—we’re still ready.

“It is as simple as one word, in denial,”

My mind stopped thinking for a second as I heard what he answered making me look at him which surprised me as my eyes met the ferocious gaze of him.

“Sorry? Can you elucidate?” our block mate said.

I then revoke my gaze and look back at the swaying trees as I can almost hear the crazy rhythm of my heart. What the heck is wrong with me? Kanina lang nalulungkot ako, ngayon naman hindi mapakali itong puso ko.

“What else could it be? If you’re not going to acknowledge your feelings for someone then probably your too innocent for this like a fetus,” he said with an annoyed tone in his words making our block mate agree in his words and make him sit back on his seat.

And what’s wrong with this dude too?