Protect Me From Myself

-Chapter.2

Dani

“What was that all about?”

“Nothing.” I keep my eyes on the clipboard in my hand, pretending to read the stock sheet. I already know everything is as it should be. And no, we don't have anywhere to be until a call comes in. But I'm all flustered right now.

What the hell was that all about?

I was fine until Greg shook my hand, then I felt like I'd been electrocuted. I felt it from the tips of my toes to the ends of my hair. Yes, it was that powerful. I can still feel it zinging through me.

“Nothing? Dani, you practically ran away from Greg.”

“No, I didn't. I don't know him. What was I supposed to say?”

“My brother-in-law is married to Greg's sister, your friend.”

“Greg is Della's brother?”

Enzo nods in my direction.

Great. That means he'll probably be around a lot, and I don't know if I can handle that.

I've never had that kind of reaction to a man before; I don't understand it. I'm not a nun. Of course, I'm not; I'm twenty-six years old. But men and I don't go well together. I've never found one who doesn't want to change me, rule me, own me. I've been there and done that, and I will never allow another man to treat me that way. I'm fiercely independent, and I won't change for anyone.

Besides, I didn't move to this town to fall for anyone. I came here to get away from my ex-husband and his crazy behavior. Starting something with anyone would be stupid. Especially when I won't be staying here all that long. I never stay in one place very long. It's safer if I don't.

Even if this is the place, I've stayed the longest in the past four years. Hell, I've even gotten myself a job that I love, a job that I'm good at and proud of. I just wonder how much longer I'll be able to stay here before I have to move on.

Every day I'm here, I thank God it's been a good day, and Joel Scott hasn't found me this time. It's been eight months; maybe he's gotten bored following me and ruining my life. Pigs might fly, but a girl can hope.

Then again, I've been patiently waiting while someone close to me works hard to find out where he is. I need to know so I can find my son. The son he stole from me. The son I don't even know is alive anymore.

Unless you've lost your child or had them stolen from you, you can't possibly know what it does to a mother to never know what happened to that child. Mine literally vanished off the face of the earth, with no trace that anyone took him. There's no trace he's even alive.

There was no CCTV footage of my son other than when he was with me hours before he went missing. I told the cops Joel had taken him, but they didn't believe me. As Joel wasn't his father – it's a long story – and he had shown no interest in my baby before he went missing, even though it was well documented that Joel had been stalking me, wanting to bring me back to him for his sick little games, and that's why I'd been put in witness protection, they didn't investigate.

I know Joel took my son. He'd found me, beat me, stolen my son. Only one person believed my story. One person, who, even though I'd been taken out of witness protection because the cops thought I no longer needed it, kept moving me around the country to protect me. A man who promised he wouldn't stop protecting me until the day he no longer needed to. A man who swore he would find my son, and he won't give up until the day I have my baby back.

It hurts so much to think about him, and wish he was with me every day. But I know I have to keep going and act as normal as I can until the day all of this is over.

Right now, I'm a firefighter/paramedic, and I'm damn good at the job I do. A job I fought hard to get even through all of what happened to me. My name might be different, but my dreams never changed. Plus, I want to be able to give my son a good life when I get him back.

I say when because I will never give up hope of finding my baby. Never.

“Unit 4, respond to address one-eight-one Sycamore Street. Suspected heart attack.”

“Roger, base.” I slot the radio back into its slot and fasten my seatbelt. It's needed with the way Enzo drives. I swear he thinks he's a race car driver half the time.

We're at the specified address in three minutes. I grab my jump bag, slinging it over my shoulder before racing to the front door.

Enzo has his medical equipment strapped to him. He's a good-looking guy for a man in his thirties. Tall, dark and handsome. An ex-cage fight. He's super fit and seriously strong in every way, and I wonder why he still does this job. I get the firefighting; it's immensely gratifying, and so is being a paramedic. But I thought a man who owned so much would want to kick his heels back and live a life of leisure.

That isn't Enzo, though. Enzo is a powerful man who likes helping people. His wife is a nurse, and they are both well-loved in this town. Enzo has saved many lives over the years he's been doing this, and no one understands why he isn't Lieutenant of the fire department yet. The man could do the job standing on his head.

But according to Enzo, he'd rather leave that job to someone else. He likes being in the field doing the job he's always done. Lieutenant isn't his dream. I think he's mental. If the chance to become Lieutenant came up for me, I'd jump at it. But that's just me.

Besides, I have a few years before anything like that would happen to me; I've only been doing this job for a few short months. Not that anyone here knows that fact. As far as the people of this town know, I've been doing this job for five years. And this town has a Lieutenant, the same one it's had for the past six years after old man Jones retired. Lysander Cadell is nice enough. Forty-two years old, built like a bear, much like Enzo. Everyone's friend. Although he's not a pushover by any means.

He's asked me out for coffee more than once. Asked me out for dinner, a date, no less, a couple of times. I let him down gently every time. He's not my type, and like I said, I'm not here looking to start anything with anyone.

I'm pretty much a damn nun, but that's how it has to be.

“Mrs. Lowell! It's Enzo Ryker,” Enzo shouts through the door, which is open ajar. The people of this town aren't as comfortable with me yet as they obviously are with Enzo. I haven't been here all that long. I'm new, and it's taking a while for the elderly residents to warm up to me.

Which is odd when everyone is so friendly in this town. Can't say they haven't been, but some seem a little hostile toward me.

We walk deeper into the house. “Mrs. Lowell, are you in here?”

“Through here, Enzo!” We quickly walk into the den. Mrs. Lowell, seventy-two years old, is cradling her husband, stroking his cheek, and kissing his head while telling him everything will be alright.

His face is so pale he needs oxygen.

Immediately, I whip out the small oxygen tank and slip the mask over his face as Enzo checks his vitals.

“Can you tell me what happened, Mrs. Lowell?” Enzo doesn't even look at her when he asks. He's too busy dealing with Mr. Lowell.

“We were dancing. It's our anniversary. We've been married fifty-four years today.”

“Congratulations.” I smile in her direction. Fifty-four years is a long time.

She smiles slightly before continuing her story. “Albert suddenly clutched his chest and fell to the floor. I knew it was a heart attack right away because he'd been suffering for months with chest pains. The doctor told us he needed to cut down on his cholesterol. I called you right away, Enzo.”

“Dani, get the gurney. We need to get him to the hospital immediately.”

We're a lightning team, Enzo and me. We have that older gentleman in the ambulance and arriving at the hospital in less than ten minutes. We do our usual handoff, but where we'd usually leave right away and check the ambulance for our next call, it's time for a break. Enzo leads me up to the cafeteria and orders us both a coffee.

I'm not surprised to see his wife walking toward us with a smile on her face. Enzo is already out of his seat, arms open, his wife walking right into them. Enzo and Paige have been married for a little over four years, and they're so in love it's almost nauseating.

Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against love, but I'm not the kind of girl men love, who they'd do anything for, even die for, if it was required of them. I'm not stupid; I don't live in fairytale land wondering when my prince will come along and save me. I don't need saving; I'm a strong woman in every sense of the word. I don't need a man for anything.

“Hi, Dani.”

“Hey, Paige.”

I watch her take a seat as Enzo goes to grab her a coffee. “Busy day?”

I shrug. “It's not too bad.”

Although I'm thinking about your best friend's brother and what his body might look like out of his clothes.

I could just scream right now. I don't understand why I'm thinking about Greg so much; I don't even know him! He was dressed and smelt like he'd been working out for hours, yet he made my whole body tingle like crazy.

I can't explain it because I just don't understand it. I've never felt electricity spark through my body from a simple touch of someone's hand before.

“Paige, can I ask you something?” She nods.

I look over at Enzo; he's next in line. I want to ask her this before he comes back. I'll never hear the end of it if he finds out.

“I met Della's brother today.”

A smile broadens her face. “Greg, huh?” I roll my eyes but nod my head. “What do you want to know?”

You don't need to be cocky about it!

I shuffle forward in my seat to get closer, not wanting anyone to hear me. I'm so pathetic.

Who cares who hears me?

I only want to know what she knows about him. Whether or not he's a psycho or not. It's not like I'm asking her to set up our marriage.

Marriage. I shudder at the thought.

“I was just wondering about him. I've heard his name before, but no one ever said anything about him.”

“About who?”

Great.

I widen my eyes at Paige, but she's already telling Enzo as he sits beside her that I was asking about Greg.

He smirks at me. “So, you are interested.” It wasn't a question.

“Not like that, Enzo. I was just curious. I haven't heard much about him since I've been here, yet all his siblings live here and talk constantly. I just wondered if he'd been estranged from them, and that's why they don't talk about him much.”

“Sure.” He chuckles around his coffee cup.

“Greg is a private person,” Paige tells me as she pulls at her purple scrubs, pulling the top straight. “He lives in Seattle and runs the law firm he owns there with Kory.”

“Wait, he's a lawyer, too?”

Paige nods.

Interesting.

“Greg went through something a few months ago that changed his life.”

Enzo grabs Paige's arm and shakes his head. I narrow my eyes at them and the way they're silently communicating.

What the hell are they saying to each other?

Enzo looks at me and sighs. “What Greg went through isn't our story to tell. But he's a good guy. He used to have a reputation for sleeping with women, many women.” He laughs.

I don't care about that sh.it; everyone has a past. I'm not the kind of woman who thinks a man shouldn't have a past; I doubt many men out there don't have one. Hell, I have one.

“But he hasn't been that way for a good long time. He likes his privacy, doesn't go out much, etc.”

“I see.”

So, Greg is a private person, doesn't go out much, he's sexy as hell, makes my body tingle just thinking about him, and...

Enzo snapping his fingers in front of my face brings me out of thought. I'm not embarrassed. I learned a long time ago that being embarrassed is pointless.

“Think she's got it bad already, baby.”

“Shut up, Enzo.”

“Oh, my God,” Paige laughs. “I think you might be right. But I have to go back to work now.” She kisses Enzo and then turns to me. “Greg is a good man. You could do worse.” With that, she's gone.

Little does she know that I've had worse, much worse. Not that anyone in this town will ever know about the worst man in my life. At least, I'll do my damnedest to ensure they don't find out. But this thing with Greg, his whole privacy thing. I wonder why he's that way. I'm curious what his story is.

Not that I can befriend him and try to discover his story when I don't want anyone to know mine. We're all entitled to our secrets. Just as long as those secrets don't hurt those around us.

* * *

Today turned out to be busier than either Enzo or I expected. There were three more callouts, then a callout where every firefighter and paramedic was sent to Turners Pass. A massive industrial fire. Arson. Typical.

The trouble with small towns is that there aren't enough firefighters to go around. Thank God we managed to call in twenty from surrounding towns.

It took three hours to put out and a further two to investigate. I could have gone home, but Enzo is at the top of the chain under the Lieutenant. He may not have wanted the job himself, but he's always there to lean on, and he didn't want me going home alone when something like this can crush a person. Death is never easy. Trust me.

There were three casualties. Two men and one woman, all working the night shift in the packing warehouse. One man died en route to the hospital, his injuries too severe to save him. The other two patients were alive when they arrived at the hospital and still are, to my knowledge.

It's always heartbreaking when someone dies, but there's no use in putting feelings into it; it won't change anything. It's hard, but we have to shut ourselves off from it all. Sometimes, it's not that simple. Like when we rescue a child, and it dies, then it's really hard to shut it out. I haven't been on a callout here where a child has died yet. And I say yet because there's always the possibility. I'm not stupid about the world I work in.

Enzo finally let me go home, but only after I sat with everyone else involved while a counselor talked about how we were feeling. I didn't cry like most did. It's not that this stuff doesn't affect me; it's just that I know there's not much point. Many would say crying helps get it all out, and it does, sometimes. This just wasn't one of them.

I shower away the day and the soot from my body, watching the dirty water being sucked down the drain. I'm tired, but I'm not sure I'll be able to sleep at all. I can't really afford not to; I have to be back at work in six hours for a debriefing on the events of what happened tonight.

Once I'm dressed in pajamas, shorts, and a tank because it's too damn hot for anything else, I make myself a quick sandwich and grab a bottle of water from the fridge. I'm not even hungry, but I know I need to keep my strength up. I can't go skipping meals when I have the chance to eat them. It's all too easy to do when you're busy with work.

I'm finally crawling into bed. With only four hours before my shift, I need to grab a couple hours of sleep. I don't know what's going on with me, but I need to sort myself out. Joel isn't here; he won't come here or find me. Or at least, he won't find me yet. I hope.

But I can't live my life looking over my shoulder every single day. Even though I know that's the safest way to live, I just want a normal life. In the time I've been here, I've felt more normal than I have in a long time.

I will have to face it sooner or later, but for now, I need sleep.