Satisfied Secrets (18+) [COMPLETE]

[5] In My Mind

~CAROLINE~

~Mature Content~

Here’s the thing about Jenna. She captured a piece of my mind and heart the day we first met, when I was fourteen and she, thirteen, while our parents were dating. She radiated through my mind like a shining beacon of sunshine only glittering for me and me alone. Her hazel eyes, her sweet, tender smile, the way she uses the back of her hand to brush her hair from her forehead. It all made me so vulnerable and intoxicated, especially when I was still figuring out my sexuality.

Calm down, Caroline. 

Fourteen. Still walking the tightrope of puberty, trying not to fall as I steady myself. This had been a time where I began to explore my sexuality, finding myself attracted to both boys and girls. In the beginning, I tried to disregard my feelings for the same s*x, focusing on extracurricular activities such as swimming and chess, debate and cheerleading, tutoring and jogging. Anything to keep my mind off the thought of when Shirley Bloom delicately coated her plump lips with strawberry-scented lip gloss, I craved to feel them against mine.

No, Caro. Behave yourself.

Or the way Lorine Porter’s hips would swing when she walked down the hall, developing an hourglass figure and all I wanted to do was wrap my arms around her waist. Especially when she wore light, feathery skirts that’d ever so gently lick the air around her.

Nope. She’s dating Mike Upton. 

Oooh, Mike Upton…

He had a charming smile, dark skin that looked like he’d been gently kissed by the sun, and built athletically inclined. He liked to show off his newly developed biceps from football practice, the girls always surrounding him giddily. I found myself nervous when I walked close to him, took in his earthy scent of rustic wood and open fields. 

I wanted to be in his arms but at the same time, I wanted Lorine Porter in mine. What was wrong with me?

It took years to cope with these new temptations and Jenna wasn’t much help. She made me lose my breath whenever she came over with her mother, Ruth, for us to “bond.” Since it’s just been her and Ruth for years, she found the thought of having a sister wonderful and, honestly, so did I. Once she broke through my barriers, to our parents’ delight, we got along really well. We enjoyed the same music, horror novels, and confided in one another about our insecurities. We became close. Too close.

Once she and Ruth moved into our duplex, we shared a room, twin beds only separated by a slim nightstand. I’d mentally trace the curvature of her jaw, the way her chest raised and deflated as she slept, watching the sheets drip down her body and her oversized nightshirt would ride up to expose her flat, smooth stomach. Night after night, I’d just watch her from my bed and think about what it’d be like to hold her, feel the warmth of her skin on mine, to kiss her pink lips.

No, we’re sisters—step-sisters. It’d be wrong, so wrong…

“Can...can you teach me...how to kiss?” Jenna asked meekly one night before bed. Her eyes darted to the ground, cheeks burning red from the question.

Feeling my heart leap into my mouth when she said those words, at first, I thought it was just in my mind. She couldn’t be asking me about kissing. Not timid little Jenna who kept her head down and spoke so softly, it was like a whisper.

“Sorry,” she frantically added. “Its just...my friends were talking about kissing and I…”

I inched closer to her, sitting on the edge of my bed. “It’s fine, Jen.” By this time, Jen was still in middle school, this being her third year, while I ventured to high school, and it seemed to have embraced me well. I found cool friends, kissed a few boys and a girl shamelessly, and finally accepted my sexuality. “I’ll show you.”

But when it came to Jenna, my hands trembled nervously as I watched her close her eyes and pucker her lips. My heart seemed to boil in my chest with more fervor than when I previously kissed someone. And all I could think about was not screwing up.

So I leaned in and pressed my lips soothingly to hers. Barely connected, still hesitant. When I pulled back, her pretty eyes fluttered open and her lips frowned, making me want to curl up into a ball and disappear. “I meant a real kiss,” she smirked. “Like the way you kissed Patrick Maroon by the park the other day.”

My mouth dropped at the confession. Her smirk widened with a mischievous glint in her eyes. A glint that made me tighten my thighs at the sight. “You saw that?!” I yelped, trying to hide my amusement and slight embarrassment.

She nodded, giggling. “Yeah. On my way home when I spotted you and him on the swingset. Is he your boyfriend now?”

I quickly shook my head. “No. Never. He was just flirting with me but it didn’t mean anything.”

“It looked like it meant something,” she muttered.

I inched closer, placing a hand on her cheek. She flinched at my touch before settling herself into my hand. I sank into the golden flecks of her hazel eyes, leaning forward towards her lips again. “I was thinking about someone I liked. The person I truly wanted to kiss at the time.”

“Who?”

The moment her pink lips curved into an ‘oh,’ I captured them in mine. This time, I savored her touch, her lips tasting delicious and cozy. With my lips, I parted her then closed them around her bottom lip with a silky demeanor. My mind swirled with colorful delight that I was living out a fantasy I’d dream about for so many nights. Her tiny moan made my insides bubble and before I knew it, I was pulling away with a satisfied grin.

Her eyes remained closed, lips still puckering the air as I leaned back to stand. “And that’s how you kiss. Just think about someone you like.” 

She remained silent as I walked around her bed and out the bedroom door, trying to keep a cool head while my heart thumped uncontrollably, making it hard to breathe. 

Oh my God, I just...kissed...Jenna.

And after, I wanted to try again but we never did, both of us never mentioning it to my disappointment. Maybe she was ashamed by it or uncomfortable but it was like she locked our kiss away into the deepest, darkest chambers of her mind. We went on like normal but I couldn’t get her out of my mind.

And now, as I thought about that kiss years later, waking up beside my beloved husband, I wanted nothing more than to head down the hall and kiss her again. But I digressed, shifting in bed to stare at the only one who ever truly matched the sensation Jenna naturally emanated.

The only one who ever made my heart strum as uncontrollably as she had.

“Good morning, honey…” he greeted, eyes still closed. He had a sixth sense of knowing when I was awake and would wake himself at the same time, never a minute late.

“Good morning.” I kissed the nape of his neck, fingers slithering down towards his morning wood. He groaned the moment my fingers touched the length of him, massaging as I began to kiss downwards along his collar bone.

“Feels like someone woke up on the naughty side,” he chuckled, voice gravelly and deep. 

Crawling downwards with my kisses, I whispered, “Very naughty.” My fingers encircled his swollen member. Now beneath the sheets and crawling between his thighs, I sighed in bliss.

Troy. Ever since high school, we just clicked. Mentally, emotionally, sexually. He made my feelings for Jenna take a backseat for the first time in years and we both explored the milestones of a relationship together. 

He filled a space in my heart I thought could never be filled again. And I wanted to thank him every day for that.

The moment my tongue lapped at the bulbous head of his rod, his hips trembled and I felt his fingers rake through my messy hair. Salty on my tongue, I sunk my mouth further to engulf his delicious manhood, moaning to cause a vibration of pleasure.

“Mmm, baby, you’re so good at that,” he complimented with a deep growl. Gracefully lowering my hand, I massaged his balls while I continued to suck him off, his groan satisfying to my ears. “Come here, Caro.”

With a lewd pop of my lips, I slipped off of him and scrambled upwards where he took me into his arms. Our naked bodies pressed together perfectly, his lips kissing my neck and down to my erect n*****s. I moaned in his ear, positioning my legs over his lap and shivering as his fingers drew circles along my back. Sometimes when he touched me like this, I’d wonder what it would feel like to be in this position with Jenna. Would she kiss me so hungrily like him? Would her fingers feel silky along my skin? How would she play with me?

How would I play with her?

“Ride my d**k, baby,” he moaned, those wide, sultry eyes gazing up at me. “I need to feel you.”

“Oh, yes.”

Sinking onto his hefty c**k, filling the walls of my core, I moaned at the satisfying feeling of being back home. Staring deeply into my husband's eyes, I felt shameful that Jenna would wisp through my mind during intimate times like this. Especially now that it’s been more than a week since she moved in. And Jen had a way of making herself feel at home—from wearing revealing nightgowns before bed to the way she’d lean on my shoulder while we watched movies. Everything about her made me want to…

“Ah!” I moan, Troy thrusting himself deep inside of me. I held onto his shoulders, a primal urgency flowing through him, holding me tighter. It took everything inside me to keep my voice low so Jenna wouldn’t hear down the hall. “That’s it. Punish my little hole.”

He grunted loudly, large hands gripping my ass, pounding my insides. “I love that naughty mouth of yours!” A cyclone of orgasmic sensations swirled through the pit of my gut, leaning on his shoulder, wondering where all this energy was coming from. Lately, he’d been riding me with greedy lust I couldn’t put my finger on, especially early in the morning. It made my mind go ballistic, his manhood pleasing every crevice of my womanhood. This carnal behavior lurched out of him, practically shouting the words, “Oh, yes, baby!”

I rapidly cover his mouth, moaning deliriously, “Quiet. You might...wake up...Jenna—AH!”

Beast-like, his thickness imploded inside of me all at once, hot cream glazing my inside, making me shudder and c*m in response. I groaned, my body gradually sinking into his arms. He kissed my cheek while I sighed, holding him tight while my mind wondered, ‘What has gotten into him?’ A smile pulled at my lips. This side of him usually took some time to unearth but it’s been very prominent lately. And I liked it...a lot.

*~*~*~*~*~*

“Why are you throwing raspberries at each other?” I asked, pausing at the entrance of the kitchen.

Jenna and Troy froze like two kids that’s just been caught, doe eyes widening as they turn to me with rosy red cheeks. Ever since Jenna came back into our lives, I noticed they’ve returned to their childish antics of when they were in high school. Troy, always teasing her, mimicking a playful dog constantly wanting to catch the ball, and Jenna, a kitten that just wanted to mess with him for her own sake. Usually for revenge purposes. They had a frivolous dynamic I couldn’t quite understand but it fit them perfectly.

But I was glad they’d returned to normal. The first couple of days, there’d been an awkward fog between them I couldn’t snuff out. Then Troy, always the instigator, started messing with her childishly until she returned to her habit of returning the favor. Soon after, I’d find them teasing one another, getting into their little quarrels over the pettiest stuff, and riling and throwing things. Why have kids when I already had my hands full with these two? 

Troy quickly pointed at Jenna raking a thrown raspberry out her hair. “She started it!” he accused.

Jenna gave him a cute glare. “You lying heathen,” she cursed.

I just rolled my eyes and smiled, walking over to grab a protein shake out the fridge. “Well, you both need to clean up your little food fight before work.” Leaning over, I kissed Troy on the cheek, tasting a hint of raspberry. “I have to head out early. Kettleson’s coming to find Rhodes replacement.” And I have to make sure Harrison doesn’t try anything…

“Have a wonderful day, sweetie.”

“Good luck, sis.”

Leaving them to their own devices, I headed to work at Kettleson & Lee Law just outside the shimmering city gaze of downtown L.A. I’ve only been working here for almost three years, being poached straight out of law school by the law firm. And I’ve already made a name for myself along with snide remarks and questioning glares from my associates. Being one of the only women at the firm that wasn’t a receptionist or secretary, many questioned my capabilities. Some still do.

“Mrs. Adler,” Susan, my secretary, heaved, trying to match my rushed pace down the hall. “Mr. Kettleson just arrived a few moments ago.”

“Wonderful. Is he in my office?”

She pinched her lips, making my gut sink uncomfortably. “About that…”

Oh, no!

“...he’s in Harrison’s office. I tried to stop him.”

“It’s alright. I’ll handle it.”

Turning down the hall towards Harrison’s office, I noticed he purposely kept it cracked open as both gentlemen chuckled at something. Forcing a smile as I entered, straightening my back, hair pulled into a sleek ponytail, ready to beat Harrison at his own game.

“Good morning, gentlemen,” I greeted, eyes focusing on Alan Kettleson. Although still glowing with youth, he had a suave, older demeanor that commanded respect and attention. His grandfather, the co-founder of the firm, had been a lawyer himself until he branched into other business fields but kept the company under his wing. Alan used to have Rhodes as his lawyer but they had a falling out just before Rhodes (forced) retirement and now he was looking for a replacement.

And Harrison and I, two of the best, wanted that position.

“Oh, Adler, glad you could make it,” Harrison greeted smugly. “Won’t you be a dear and get me and Mr. Kettleson a cup of coffee?”

I took a firm step inside his office, that forced smile making my cheek burning. “Again, Harrison, not your secretary. But you, by all means, can go out and get some while I have my designated meeting with Mr. Kettleson.”

Harrison forged a surprisingly disappointing expression. “That was today, wasn’t it? I just invited Kettleson to go golfing so we could chat about my proposal.”

This little… “That sounds fantastic. Taking some time out of the office. Why don’t I join you?” Ignoring Harrison, I turned to Mr. Kettleson. “You wouldn’t mind, would you?”

He shook his head. “The more, the merrier,” Kettleson grinned, obviously amused by our bantering.