Defne.
This couldn't be more embarrassing.
I tilt my head so that the computer hides my face, but as it has for the past three days, it still doesn't work.
I still feel his eyes like daggers on me.
"That doesn't work," Levi says loud enough for me to hear him.
I control my breathing, careful not to move anything unintentionally, lest I cause a catastrophe, which I suspect he has been waiting for.
Matheo Slade comes every day, without fail, to check the design area. He walks around like a commander in every booth, checking that everyone is at their respective post and doing their job. But no one is stupid. Everyone knows he's doing it for me.
It cannot be a coincidence that since I started working, he, the CEO of the company, begins his surveillance of the area which, it is rumoured, he has never touched before.
This would all sound romantic, if it weren't for the look of hatred he sends me every time he sees me.
I swear, the man makes me nervous. Which inevitably makes me a bigger mess than I already am.
Whether he knows it or not, his attitude has brought rumors. And there's even already betting on when I'll finally screw it up again and he'll finally get his wish: to fire me.
The man hates me and everyone knows it.
"Is he gone already?" I ask Levi when I no longer feel the weight of his gaze on me.
"Clear."
I sigh, letting out a good breath of air.
"I've never seen anyone look at you with the intensity he looks at you. What was it about that office that made him hate you?"
No one knows what really happened in that office, although rumors abound. The first day the rumors were of a romantic nature, rumor had it that I was the boss's mistress. However, after his first visit to the design area, those rumors disappeared under the fire of his gaze. And that's because everyone realized that the fire he had in store for me was not the good kind, no. It was the bad kind, the really bad kind.
Kacey feels so guilty about everything that happened, that if she was nice to me before, now she goes overboard. She blames herself for not telling me that when she told me "at the end of the hallway, the second door", she meant the door on the right side, not on the left side. She was sending me to her own office to use her bathroom, not directly to the hatred of our boss.
I sigh again and concentrate on my work again, trying to ignore Levi's incessant questions.
I'm not normally a big talker, but the last three days I've been quieter than ever. I'm afraid to say anything that will get me in more trouble, and I highly doubt my father would appreciate that. When he explicitly told me to lay low, I don't think that included falling naked inside Matheo Slade's office.
God, what a mess!
"Oh no," I mutter as I read the mail I've received. "No no no no. No".
Scarlett needs me in her office.
Now.
No, no, no, no.
I'm gonna get fired.
I know they are.
I'm going to get fired.
Controlling my nerves, I stand up at the same time as Levi, so we both stare at each other, quizzical.
"The boss summoned me to Scarlett's office, and you?"
"Scarlett summoned me to her office" I answer.
We look at each other strangely, neither of us not understanding and I wonder inwardly now what I did.
We walk in silence towards our superior's office and follow when she says aloud: "Come in, Defne" but then she sees who I am with and says a confused: "What are you doing here, Levi?"
"Mr. Slade summoned me here".
I look at the exchange confused, not knowing what's going on, which they don't seem to know either.
But I know it can't be good.
I'm in trouble again, I know.
When the door opens again, Matheo Slade enters in all his imposing glory, but stops as soon as he sees me.
"What the f**k are you doing here?"
I flinch at the tone of his voice, but I'm also embarrassed by the surprised look on Levi and Scarlett's faces at his treatment of me.
Can this get any more humiliating?
"I sent for her, Matheo," Scarlett interjects. "What I don't understand is what Levi is doing here".
Really, someone explain to me what's going on or I'm going to freak out.
"Was it her?" Matheo asks incredulously, looking at Scarlett dumbfounded.
She sighs, seeming to understand what I don't and with a wave of her hand asks Levi to leave.
"Was really her?" He asks again when it's just the three of us.
"You can explain to me what's going on," I remark, "If you're going to fire me, you can just say so".
Scarlett looks at me with cold anger in her eyes, while Matheo Slade looks at me with the hatred I'm getting used to.
"We're not going to fire you, Defne" Scarlett finally speaks "You managed the aviation company's website project, didn't you?"
"Yes" I nod slowly.
"The client was very satisfied with your design and wants you to also design the aesthetics of their app to match the work you already did for them. You will have help, of course. In addition, they want you to design a new logo based on everything you've done, as well as other advertising material that they expect to start circulating in the next few months, in the middle of the high season".
I remain silent, still not quite taking in what has just happened.
"I can't believe it was her," Matheo says, his jaw set in granite as he avoids looking at me. That's fine with me, I'd rather he didn't look at me than look at me with such a heavy grudge.
Slowly, I realize that Levi was here because Matheo thought he was in charge of the project. I've worked here long enough to know that Levi is the best and the one who stands out above the rest. However, that disbelief in Matheo Slade stings, because it is humiliating. I understand that he hates me for what happened, but for him to question my abilities and show such disbelief in the face of something I worked hard to do is just...abhorrent. Not to mention discriminatory.
"Is it because I'm a woman that you show such disbelief?" I ask, not taking it anymore.
"No, my disbelief is because of what a mess of a person you are" he replies, then he turns to look at Scarlett. "Are you sure it was her?"
"Yes" she says, but even I see her doubting herself, as if the imposingness of his question throws her off. "Yes, I'm sure" she says with more clarity.
"I can't give such a big project to her, Scarlett".
"I'm sorry?"
"She's going to ruin it".
I grind my teeth, filled with rage.
"They asked for it, Matheo" Scarlett reminds him almost submissively.
"I'm not going to give her that project" he repeats more forcefully, then looks at me and says: "Impossible".
And he goes out, slamming the door loudly.
Someone please take the stick out of his ass.
"Defne, I don't know what happened between you two to make him act like this, nor do I care, but I must add that I don't like you either, not after the coffee incident for which you didn't even apologize" Scarlett reminds me, staring at me. "But this is my job and the customer asked for you. And here we give the customer what he wants. I'll talk to Matheo and try to calm him down, but be prepared, because you'll get this project. You can go now".
I leave there in such a rage, I have to go to the bathroom to try to calm down.
I can't believe that asshole.
He doesn't even know me, he doesn't know anything about my capabilities, but he already seems to have defined what kind of person I am and how deficient I am at my job.
I groan when I feel the tears sting my eyes and curse when one falls.
If before I met him I didn't want to be here... now even less.