ZAIYREE
“Because she’s not welcome to stay here,” Alpha Ezra said. He looked at me with cold eyes. I was nothing to him. He made that clear with his indifference to me.
“That’s not your decision,” Amara said. She put her hands on her hips and stood as tall as she could. She was significantly shorter than her brother, but she held just as much fierceness as he did.
“I’m the alpha. She can’t stay here, and that’s final.” Alpha Ezra sneered at Amara before turning on his heels and storming down the hall.
My fingers curled into fists, and I couldn’t stop the frustration building inside of me. Alpha Ezra knew almost nothing about me. He barely said two words to me, but he already decided I wasn’t worth living in the same house as him. He knew my wolf wasn’t active, and he could clearly see how rough the years had been on my body. I had been trying to prepare myself for his rejection, but after seeing his face, I was angry, not accepting.
I survived. I escaped. I never thought I would have left that human compound alive, and now that I did, I found myself in the presence of an arrogant asshole alpha.
“Good!” I shouted out after Alpha Ezra. “I wouldn’t want to be around an ass like you anyway.”
This made Alpha Ezra stop. He didn’t look at me, but I could feel his anger building. I waited for him to say something, anything. He huffed, as if fighting the urge to yell. Then he continued stomping down the hallway, and then I heard the sound of a door slamming echo from the same direction.
Amara looked at me with raised eyebrows. “I didn’t know you had that kind of spunk in you.”
My anger faded the moment I realized I had yelled at the alpha of this pack and insulted him. As much as I hated his behavior towards me, I didn’t want to be kicked out of this pack. I knew I wouldn’t survive out in the world by myself, especially with the wolf hunters ruling the land.
“I- I didn’t mean it,” I stuttered. I had meant it, but I regretted it almost instantly.
This only made Amara laugh. “Don’t take it back now. He deserved it.” She gave me a wink, and her reaction made me feel better. I still regretted yelling out like that. Something like that would have gotten me killed in the slave compound I had escaped from.
“I don’t want to be kicked out,” I said, biting my lip and looking away. “I can’t handle it. I- I…” My voice trailed off as my chest started to tighten. The confidence I had a moment ago was nowhere to be found. I imagined myself being taken back to the dirty, unlit cage, becoming a slave to the humans again, and losing all reasons to live. I couldn’t go back to a life like that. I wouldn’t go back.
Amara grabbed my shoulders, making me flinch, but she didn’t let go. She looked me in the eyes and waited until I returned her gaze. “Listen to me. You’re not going anywhere. I promise. My brother may be a big dumb brute sometimes, but he’s not cruel. He would never turn a werewolf in need away, unless you directly do something to harm the pack. This is no excuse for him, but he’s been going through a lot. He’s normally not like that.”
It was hard to believe there was a different side to Ezra. He had made no attempt to show kindness since I got here. Even if he was normally a nice guy, it was clear that there was something about me that he didn’t like. That thought made a pang run through my chest. It felt like my mate was rejecting me, and it was physically painful. I didn’t want Alpha Ezra to be my mate, especially since he didn’t want me. I didn’t need him to love me. I just needed him to let me live here.
“I don’t think I should stay here,” I said. If staying in the pack house made Alpha Ezra uncomfortable, I didn’t want to do it. I would rather live in a different house than stay here and risk a future in this pack.
Amara waved her hand. “Nonsense. I want to monitor your health closely, and this makes the most sense. You are staying here, and that’s final.”
I nodded along, but I was still unsure. I was sure I wouldn’t be able to change Amara’s mind, though. She seemed too hard-headed for that. She was like Alpha Ezra in that way.
***
Amara got me set up in a room in the pack house. I didn’t have the energy to argue against Amara, so I agreed to the room and decided I would just do what I could to avoid the alpha for now.
I had been in the room all day, claiming I just needed rest–which wasn’t a complete lie– and Amara left me alone, because she had other duties to attend to. It was dark when my stomach started growling, but it was easy for me to push past the feeling, since I had lived half of my life in a state of hunger. I didn’t want to emerge from my room until I knew it was safe to do so without running into anyone.
The house was quiet when my thirst finally got the best of me. I listened by the door, and it was completely silent, so I figured everyone was asleep already. I moved through the dark with ease, since my werewolf senses were heightened in the dark. Even though Talia hadn’t appeared in years, I hadn’t lost all of my wolf senses, at least, just the ability to shift into werewolf form.
I went directly to the kitchen, remembering exactly where it was from the mini-tour Amara had given me. I had gotten in the habit of memorizing floor plans with Jasiah. He always wanted to be aware of his surroundings, in case the opportunity to escape ever arose, and he got me into the same habit.
The kitchen was pristine with marbled countertops and dark wooden cabinets. It was an easy reminder that the werewolves in this pack didn’t live the kind of life I had been forced to for years on end. They had running water, their own houses, plenty of food. I was sure they faced their own struggles, but this life felt like a fairytale for me, and I was still waiting for the moment when my reality set in.
I opened the refrigerator to see if there was anything in there I could take that wouldn’t be considered stealing. I didn’t need much food. Just a couple of nibbles would hold my noisy stomach over until the morning. A lot of the food in the refrigerator looked like it needed to be cooked, so I shut the door, deciding to look for some water instead. This wouldn’t be the first time I had gone through the night with a demanding stomach.
There had to be cups on one of the shelves, so I started opening the cupboards, trying to find the dishware. Before I could find what I was looking for, I heard footsteps approaching. I didn’t want anyone to see me sneaking around at night, so I pushed myself into the corner between the wall and the refrigerator and held my breath, trying to make me seem as small as possible. It was my instinct to hide when I heard people approaching.
I heard whoever it was shuffling around the room, and the scent of sandalwood filled my nose. It smelled amazing, and I had to stop myself from moving to get a better whiff of the scent.
The movement stopped, and the room was silent except for the soft tick of a clock nearby. I hoped the person would just leave without noticing my presence. My heart raced with each tick that sounded louder and louder. Finally, the person started moving again, their footsteps echoing away.
I let out the breath I was holding and closed my eyes, relieved I hadn’t been caught. When I opened my eyes, I screamed, seeing a face a few inches away from me. Alpha Ezra quickly pressed his hand against my mouth to muffle the scream. My heart raced, filled with fear as Alpha Ezra stared at me. The scent of sandalwood filled my nose with him so close to me.
“What are you doing in here, sneaking around?” he demanded, still holding my mouth closed with his hand.
I pulled his hand off of me. “I was just thirsty. I’ll just head back to my room now.” I tried to slip past him, but it was hard to get past his large frame. He easily grabbed my arm and stopped me. His touch was surprisingly soft.
“You don’t have to go. You haven’t had anything to drink yet, have you?” he asked.
I shook my head slowly and just watched him. He had barely spoken to me since I'd gotten here, and he acted like he hated me, but now he was being strangely gentle with me.
He let go of me and grabbed a cup from one of the cupboards I hadn’t been able to check. He was only in a towel, and I found my eyes scanning his toned back, wondering what it would feel like to touch his muscles. He filled up the cup with water from the sink before handing it to me. I looked at the cup, but I felt weary of his actions. I would have expected him to yell at me or something. Definitely not this.
“Why are you being so nice to me? I thought you hated me,” I asked, gripping the glass with both hands. I didn’t want him to see just how shaky I was.
Alpha Ezra leaned against the counter and ran his fingers through his hair. “I don’t hate you.”
“I don’t believe you.” The words fell out of my mouth without a thought. There was no other explanation for the way he was treating me.
He half-chuckled and shook his head. “That’s fair. I haven’t been the most welcoming to you.”
I blinked at him a few times. The man in front of me didn’t seem like the alpha I had met a few times. Maybe Amara was right about him being stressed, but it still didn’t excuse his behavior.
“I don’t understand what I did to you to make you dislike me so much.” I had tried to think of every possibility, but none of the answers I thought of made any sense.
“You’re my mate,” he said simply.
“That’s not supposed to make you hate me,” I countered. He wasn’t being very clear.
“I don’t hate you,” he said. His eyes met mine, and my heart started to race. If he kept looking at me that way, I knew it would be hard to stay mad at him.
I tore my eyes away from him and looked down at the glass in my hands. “Then why have you been avoiding me? If you plan on rejecting me, just do it. It would be easier than staying in this weird limbo, wondering what I did wrong. I don’t need you to love me. I just want a place where I can call home–one where I’m not constantly afraid for my life.”
“It’s complicated,” he said.
“Are you going to say more? Because that’s not a real answer. If you are going to kick me out of here, just tell me–”
Alpha Ezra moved with lightning speed and grabbed my face, stopping me from speaking mid-sentence. “I will never kick you out. No matter what happens, you will have a place in this pack.” He leaned forward until his nose brushed against my ear. He inhaled deeply, sending tingles running down my spine. “You smell so good.”
I didn’t know what to say. Every cell in my body wanted me to wrap myself around this man and get lost in him, but one conversation was not enough to erase his behavior. That didn’t stop my body from craving him, though, and I could feel my arousal building between my legs.
“Damn it,” he sputtered, pulling away from me. “I can’t do this.”
“Why?” I whispered, my throat dry from desire.
“I’m engaged to be married,” he said simply.
My hands went numb, and the cup in my hand slipped out of my grip.