Racing Hearts

Chapter 6: Unclear

As Serena walked away from Eli’s garage, the evening air felt colder than usual. Her mind was a whirlwind of emotions—confusion, sadness, frustration.

Every step she took felt heavier, like each one was pulling her farther away from something she desperately wanted but couldn’t have.

How had she let herself fall for him so quickly? She had always prided herself on keeping her heart guarded, not rushing into things. But with Eli, everything had felt different. There was a spark between them, a connection she couldn’t deny. And yet, here she was, confronted with the fact that part of him still belonged to someone else. Someone who had left him, but who had never fully left his heart.

The city lights blurred in the distance as she walked back to her apartment. She couldn’t stop thinking about the way Eli had looked when he talked about Arietta—his ex who had disappeared from his life so abruptly. The pain in his eyes was real, undeniable. And as much as she wanted to be angry with him for not being able to let go, she understood it. Everyone carried baggage. Everyone had scars.

But that didn’t make it any easier.

As soon as she got home, Serena collapsed onto the couch, her phone clutched in her hand. She stared at the screen for a long time, her thumb hovering over Nicole’s name in her contacts. She needed to talk to someone, and Nicole had always been her go-to, her sounding board. But something made her hesitate. Nicole had been the one to bring up Arietta in the first place. Part of Serena wondered if she’d been better off not knowing.

She let out a sigh and tossed her phone onto the coffee table, leaning back and closing her eyes. What was she supposed to do now? She had thought maybe she could be the one to help Eli move on, to be the fresh start he needed. But it wasn’t that simple. People weren’t that simple.

A knock on her door startled her out of her thoughts. She frowned, not expecting anyone. When she opened the door, she was surprised to see Nicole standing there, her face full of concern.

“I had a feeling you might need someone to talk to,” Nicole said, offering a small, understanding smile.

Serena’s shoulders slumped in relief. She hadn’t even needed to call. Nicole just knew.

Without a word, she stepped aside to let Nicole in. The two of them sat on the couch, and for a few moments, neither of them spoke. Serena didn’t know where to start. How could she even explain what she was feeling when she didn’t fully understand it herself?

Nicole finally broke the silence. “So... I take it you talked to him?”

Serena nodded. “Yeah. I did.” She sighed, running a hand through her hair. “I brought up Arietta. He didn’t exactly deny that he’s still hung up on her.”

Nicole winced. “Ouch. That must’ve hurt.”

Serena let out a bitter laugh. “Yeah, it did. I mean, I knew something was off. I could feel it. But hearing him say it...”

Nicole reached out and placed a hand on Serena’s arm. “I’m sorry. I wish there was something I could say to make it better.”

“Thanks.” Serena stared at the floor, her mind replaying the conversation with Eli over and over again. “I just don’t know what to do now. Do I give him space? Do I wait for him to figure out his feelings? Or do I just... walk away?”

Nicole thought for a moment before responding. “I can’t tell you what to do, but I will say this—if he’s still hung up on Arietta, it’s not fair to you. You deserve someone who’s fully in it with you, not someone who’s stuck in the past.”

Serena bit her lip, knowing deep down that Nicole was right. But it was hard to walk away when you had already invested so much, when you saw so much potential in someone.

“I know,” she said quietly. “But it’s not that easy.”

“It never is,” Nicole agreed. “But the question you have to ask yourself is—are you willing to wait for him? And if you do, how long will you wait? Because you don’t want to lose yourself in the process.”

Serena nodded, absorbing Nicole’s words. Waiting. That’s exactly what it would be, wouldn’t it? Waiting for Eli to sort out his feelings, to decide if he was ready to let go of Arietta and move forward. But how long would that take? And was it fair to her to put her life on hold for someone who might never be ready? He can’t love two people at the same time. It is just not fair.

“I don’t want to wait forever,” Serena finally said, her voice firm. “I care about him, but I just can’t put my life on hold for someone who isn’t sure about me. Right?”

Nicole smiled, proud of Serena for standing her ground. “Good. You deserve more than that.”

Serena leaned back, letting out a long breath. “Yeah. I do.”

---

Days passed, and Serena kept herself busy with work, trying to keep her mind off of Eli and everything that had happened. She hadn’t spoken to him since their conversation in the garage, and part of her wondered if she should reach out. But every time she thought about it, she remembered what Nicole had said. She couldn’t wait forever.

One evening, as she sat at her desk, scrolling mindlessly through her emails, her phone buzzed. It was a message from Eli.

Can we talk?

Her heart skipped a beat, and for a moment, she just stared at the message. Part of her wanted to say no, to avoid the inevitable heartache that might come from whatever conversation they were about to have. But the other part of her—the part that still cared about him—wanted to hear what he had to say.

With a deep breath, she typed out a response.

Sure. When?

Eli replied almost immediately. I’m outside.

Serena’s eyes widened, and she quickly stood up, peeking out of her window. Sure enough, there he was, leaning against his car, hands shoved into his pockets. His expression was unreadable, but there was a tension in his posture that told her this wasn’t going to be an easy conversation.

She grabbed her jacket and headed outside, her heart pounding in her chest. As she approached Eli, she tried to keep her emotions in check, but it was hard. Being near him again brought everything back—the way she felt about him, the way she had hoped they could be something more.

Eli looked up as she approached, his expression softening slightly. “Hey.”

“Hey,” Serena replied, folding her arms over her chest. “What’s going on?”

Eli took a deep breath, running a hand through his hair. “I’ve been doing a lot of thinking since we last talked. About Arietta. About you. About... everything.”

Serena’s heart raced. This was it—the moment she had been dreading and hoping for all at once. “And?”

“And I realize I’ve been unfair to you,” Eli said, his voice low. “You don’t deserve to be in this position, wondering if I’m ever going to move on from her. You deserve someone who’s all in.”

Serena’s throat tightened. She didn’t say anything, waiting for him to continue.

“I want to be that person for you,” Eli said, stepping closer. “I do. But I can’t lie to you—I’m still trying to figure things out. Arietta... She's a part of my past that I can’t just erase overnight. But I care about you, Serena. I don’t want to lose you.”

Serena’s heart ached at his words. She could hear the sincerity in his voice, but she also heard the uncertainty. And that was the problem. He wasn’t sure. He wasn’t ready.

“I care about you too, Eli,” she said softly. “But I can’t be with someone who’s still holding onto someone else. It’s not fair to either of us.”

Eli looked down, his shoulders sagging slightly. “I know. And that’s why I wanted to talk to you. I don’t want to string you along. If you need space, I understand. But I don’t want you to think I don’t care about you, because I do. More than I’ve cared about anyone in a long time.”

Serena swallowed the lump in her throat. She had been hoping for something more concrete, for a sign that Eli was ready to let go of Arietta and move forward with her. But it wasn’t that simple. Life never was.

“I think I need to think more about this,” Serena finally said, her voice trembling. “I need time to figure out what I want too. And I think you need to figure out what you want.”

Eli nodded, his expression filled with regret. “I understand. I’m sorry, Serena. For everything.”

Serena forced a smile, even though her heart was breaking. “Me too.”

And with that, she turned and walked away, leaving Eli standing there in the cool night air, knowing that sometimes, love wasn’t enough. Sometimes, letting go was the hardest thing you could do, but the most necessary.

As Serena walked back to her apartment, she knew this wasn’t the end of her story with Eli. But it was the end of this chapter—one she wasn’t sure would ever have the happy ending she had once imagined.

---

xoxo