Not Today Jimin

No....

Y/n pov:

I started painting the view I got in front of myself. Painting helps me to focus on things. I paint, when I need to make important decisions for myself. Like the course I picked for my studies, the college I choose, hell even this whole marriage thing with jimin., painting helps me to figure it out. Right decisions.

I believe I should give Tae hyung some time, for whatsoever he asked for. But jimin deserves to know, that he's been back stabbed by his best friend. Hell!!  I will wait for few days and will confess everything to jimin, even taehyung like it or not. But is it necessary to tell him? I mean it's a core buried thing which no one knows it happened in the first place, so we can just pretend like it never happened....  So that our bond will never be effected. I don't want to sow this doubt in my husband's and my lives. But what's most erotic here is, I stopped acknowledging the part where even i was a part of it all. I am acting all innocent blaming it all on Tae. This all would have never happened in the first place if I didn't responded the way I did. I was just telling myself that I am giving time to tae, but in reality i am giving time to myself, to escape from the consequences. I don't want to loose jimin. He's the best thing ever happened to me, I don't know whether I love him or not...  But I don't think I will be able to live without him. What if he wants a divorce? No y/n. Wait. patience. Don't let your insecurities and negative  thoughts succumb you. I feel terrible. I just couldn't take away my mind away from all of it.

I quit painting and went back to my bed for some sleep.

Jimin POV :

"I f*****g made you clear that y/n is mine and to stay away from her taehyung. " I tightened my grip around his neck even tighter.  He struggled under my hold and finally get rid of it. He punched me on my cheek as blood started to ooze from my mouth.

"What the heck are you talking dude? " he coughed out.

"What do you think? " I was quick to get up and  hold his collar.

"You really don't think there's nothing there for you to confess me about you and y/n? " I asked him looking dead in the eye.

"I..  I, no man. There's nothing going between y/n and me. You gotta believe me. "

Poor liar.

"If that's what you want me to believe...." I pushed him back.

"Dont even assume for one second that you can play behind my back without my knowing. I will always be one step ahead of you taehyung. Now tell me you still have feelings for her? " I asked him.

"No. I don't love y/n anymore. She's in my past., that's it. Now she is your present, not mine. " Tae hyung said in order to convince me.

"You really have a good influence on people. I might actually believe you if I don't know the real you." I punched him in the stomach. He groaned in pain.

"I know you are hiding something from me. You and y/n, both. When I find it out, I will kill you. Or better you can just tell me what happened. Either ways you will be dead. Count your days Tae hyung." I spat it out, and walked out of his house leaving him in pain.

"It's time I play by my rules y/n. First of all I need you back here and trust me, I am not letting you out of my hold ever again. I promise." I made a pact with myself.

Y/n POV :

I woke up to the irritation causing in my lower part. f**k!!!!!  f**k!!!  f**k!!!!  That was a tons of blood there. Never ever in my life l,  I witnessed such thing. God!!  What's happening to me? For a second I thought of informing jimin, but I don't wanna make him worry. So, now...  I should go and see a doctor before its getting anymore worse.

.

.

I drove my car to a hospital, finding it after a long search. I waited till my name called out by the nurse.

And I went in only to be treated a very handsome doctor. A male one, that too gynecologist.

Jung Hoseok.... Well, How can I talk to him about all of it? Come on y/n... Don't be lame. See him as a doctor, not as some handsome man.

"Please take your seat Mrs. Y/n Park. " he signalled me to sit on a chair in front his table. Well, at least he's welcoming.

"Yeah,  thank you." I said while tucking my hairs behind my ear.

"Take your time, make yourself comfortable and tell me what's going on with you." he smiled.

I smiled back and tried to calm myself.

"I am encountering a really big bad bleeding these days, I mean this particular time. I never had bled out that much amount of blood in my entire life. It's Freaking me out.... Is there some kind of problem with me? And please call me

y/n doc... " I asked him panicking. He smiled once again, which weirdly calmed me down.

"Don't worry y/n. It's completely normal. It may happened because of lots of reasons. The food you take, the condition your body is in, the most importantly...  Have you been stressful past few days? Cos, it will stir up your inners and may cause lots of bleeding. And please, you too call me Hobi. " he said. OK....

"Yeah, to be honest, I have been really stressful these days. I think it is the issue. I just- I don't know what to do to be out of it." I told him.

"Y/n.... You can talk to me. It will help you feel less stressful. I was a psychology major, before a gynecologist. May be I can help you." he said.

"No am good. Thank you." I quickly turned his offer down.

"you sure...? See, I am not asking you this just because you are a wife of some Celebrity, I am least interested in all of those anyways. I just want to help you. Looks like you shred it to no-one. If you trust me, I can help you. Let me help you y/n." he tried to make me feel comfortable. And it worked. I feel it, I think I can share it with him, he made me feel ease.

"Just promise me, you are professional enough to share my private matters with anyone... "

"You can competely believe me with your secrets. I was never good enough for gossiping about others." he ensured me.

And I told him everything, I hesitated in between, but either ways I told him everything. I couldn't look at him, feeling shame for myself. I am afraid he will judge me. I deserve it, but as for my situation, right now, I need a suggestion not some judgemental comments from the only person I ever told my suffering.

And to my surprise, he smiled and held my hand.

"See y/n... I am not here to judge you, if that's what you are worried about, don't. And as per your story, I wouldn't say its nothing to be worried about.. It's complicated, I get it. But it's okay for you to take a breath in a while from all of it. Drowning yourself in your guilt over and over again, pushing yourself doesn't make things better. So you better stop thinking about it. Just tell me what you decided to do? " he asked me.

"I don't know. I am confused. I am not sure about my feelings towards jimin and taehyung. But one thing for sure, I have stronger feelings for jimin, than Tae. But what i couldn't understand is why would I do such thing with Tae hyung when I clearly know that I shouldn't?  Do u I have this undeniable attraction for him? Is it just attraction or my feelings? If I have feelings for taehyung what about jimin? I can't just have feelings for both of them at the same time right? Even if I do, what it makes me, a slut....!?" tears started forming in my eyes.

"Hey...  Hey...  Don't cry. We are all humans for a reason y/n. People make mistakes, and no-one is perfect."

"No...  You are wrong...  Jimin, my husband, he is perfect in Every aspect. He is all a girl ever wants in her life. And I...  I cheated on him. It makes feel awful. I just couldn't breathe, thinking what I have done to him. He doesn't deserve any of it. " my eyes betrayed me, as tears starting flowing out of my eyes.

"The way you are struggling for what you have done to jimin, and never even once bothered about taehyung... It tells me, jimin is more important to you than Tae. Not because he's ur husband or he's perfect or he's good to you, but because you love him y/n. I can see it in your eyes. You love jimin. " he stated it as a fact.

"I don't know... "

"OK...  Tell me you ever wanted to repeat  that moment again with taehyung?"

"NO!! " I shouted in response.

"see...  You aren't even ready to picturize the idea. That means... What ever you did, it's just a moment of some weakness. That's it.  At least that what it seems it like, to me. " he said.

"Yeah... You are right. Even when I am.... kissing tae, I wanted it to stopped. I didn't want to do it back then too. I tried to stop myself from doing it very hard, but it's like my whole body is under his control, like literally every inch of my body screamed to have s*x with him. I almost died to stop myself from it." I said him what I remembered.

"It's weird y/n..." he tilted his head to the other side and slightly pouted, thinking something in deep. Wow, he's cute. Shut up, y/n.

I just can't help but admire his beautiful face. He's so fine.

"You said you don't wanted to do it, but you did it. Why?"

"I don't know. I still couldn't think of any excuse. I just don't know. I think that's what stressing me the most. " I told him.

"Y/n... What I am gonna say may seem crazy or stupid, but I think Tae plotted you into doing this."

"I don't understand Hobi. "

"Who knows....  He would have given you some Viagra to make it work with you. I don't know it confirmed but it may be possible. " I looked at him.

"Think about it y/n. You may have crush on taehyung. But why would you, not to mention you are an super introvert, can possibly make such moves unless you are tricked..."

And slowly it made all sense. I don't know whether it's true or not. I don't know I love jimin or not, But it's my escape from feeling guilty for the entire life. And I am Not gonna let it go. Even if it's true, how stupid of me,for not thinking of any possibilities, Tae hyung's dark moves. This all time I blamed myself from what happened... I dont know, but there is a possibility.

"Thank you Hobi, you don't know how much of a favour you have done to me. I think I can think straight from now on. Once again thank you." I stood up to leave.

"You are a good person y/n. I mean it, what ever happened, whether it's taehyung's fault or your's... Don't loose hope. Always remember you deserve better. Don't beat up yourself for anything. You can come here any time if you need someone to talk to. " I smiled hearing his words.

He really did brought hope to my life, when I fee like I am lost. He's the best.

"Careful Hobi, am Married." I made fun out of his words.

"You too y/n. Because I am married too and I am just cincerned about you as my patient. That's it. You don't need to worry. " he shrugged casually.

"Hey....  I was just trying poke some fun. " I exclaimed.

"Haha..  Get going y/n. Be careful. I already prescribed you some medicines if your bleeding doesn't stop. "

"OK. Thank you." I left the hospital and started my car.

*Tring tring*

Wow Just the person I wanted to talk to.

"Taehyung.... We should talk. "

"Y/n where are you?" he asked nervously.

"Why? What happened?" I asked him back.

"Jimin went to Europe for shooting right!! His plane... His plane crashed y/n."

"No... "