Scarlett
I was a nervous wreck as I waited for Brendan to get here. I was terrified because the moment I told him everything, my entire life could change, and for the worst. I could lose everything! None of anything really matters to me, only Caleb. It would kill me if I got separated from him for at least the next twenty-plus years. I was not prepared for that, but this was the right thing.
I would rather tell my story than PJ telling it for me. He would make me look like the devil. Yes, I have done horrible things in my life, but I am not a bad person. I am not the killer that PJ trained me to be. I don’t know how Brendan will take it, but I will find out soon enough.
“Babe, Brendan is going to be here in twenty minutes,” Caleb said as he looked at his phone.
“Great,” I said, sounding happy about it, but deep down, I was bricking it.
“Everything will be fine, so don’t worry too much,” Caleb said as he patted me on the head.
I just smiled at him. I didn’t want him to worry. I took myself a walk to the bathroom to give myself some time to try and relax and calm down before he came. After a few deep breaths, I was ready to go. Just as I began opening the bathroom door, I heard a knock at the front door. It must be Brendan here already. He must be early. I closed the door again and took another few big breaths.
“Scarlett, that’s Brendan here,” Caleb shouted upstairs to me.
“Sure thing, I will be down directly,” I replied.
I splashed a little cold water on my face and told myself in the mirror that everything was going to be OK. If that is the truth, I don’t know, but I will find out soon enough. I pulled myself together and slowly made my way downstairs.
I could hear Caleb and Brendan talking.
“What is going to happen to her?”
I could hear in Caleb’s voice that he was nervous.
“I will not know that until I talk to her,” Brendan replied.
I don’t know if him saying that can be classed as a good or a bad thing.
“Hey, you two,” I said as I made my way into the room.
“Hello, Scarlett.” Brendan smiled.
“Can I get you both something to drink?” Caleb asked.
“Coffee, please, Caleb, Brendan, would you like one?” I smiled.
“Yes, please, coffee would be lovely,” Brendan said as he took off his suit jacket and hung it on the back of a chair.
“So, how have you been?” Brendan asked me as he sat down on the couch.
“I’m great, thank you, feeling much better now; I am not locked up and being held against my will,” I said as I sat down opposite him.
“Yes, I am sure you are,” he said, “Our conversation today will need to be recorded. Are you OK with that?”
“Yes, that is fine. I know you need records of everything,” I said.
“Yes. I need you to be completely honest with me, OK? Because PJ seems over-eager to tell his story about you, and I want to hear your side,”
“That doesn’t surprise me,” I sighed.
Caleb brought our coffee to us, and then Brendan asked for him to leave and let him and I talk in private at first.
“OK, Scarlett, we need to start from the beginning. I need you to tell me how you met PJ.” He said before taking a drink of his coffee.
I could feel myself begin to fidget, between rubbing my fingers together and my leg twitching. I am not usually a person to get in this sort of state, but knowing what is on the line is terrifying me. I leant forward and got my coffee off the table and took a drink. The coffee was roasting. I don’t know how Brendan could drink it.
“Scarlett, I can see you are nervous so let’s try and get through this as easy and quick as possible. I don’t want to cause you any more distress on top of everything that has happened recently.” Brendan said with a soft smile.
“OK, I am ready to do this,” I said as I let out a big breath of air.
“When did you meet him?” he asked.
“I was only a teenager. My brother got murdered, and I got into self-defence classes, and that's where I met him. He helped me through it, but at the time, I didn’t realise he was grooming me to turn me into a killer,” I whimpered.
“I didn’t realise that you were so young when you met him,” he said, “I am sorry to hear about what happened to your brother,”
“He made me believe I was ridding the world of bad,”
I hadn’t realised I was crying until I felt the tears run down my cheeks. I quickly wiped them away. This was not the time to be crying.
“Scarlett, feel free to cry as much as needed. Sometimes it takes having to talk about something to make it sink in.” He said.
“I guess that is true. I haven’t had to talk about it ever. Well, not in as much detail as we are going to have to go through.” I said with sadness in my voice.
Brendan just looked at me as he sipped away at his coffee. I think he was waiting for me to start talking again. I wiped some more tears, took a deep breath and was ready to go again.
“So after training me up, he sent me out with two of his guys to do my first job. I didn’t know what I would do until I got there and was handed a gun. I was told the man had committed a terrible crime and needed to be rid of. I didn’t question what he had done as I was brainwashed to do what they told me.” I sniffed loudly.
“Ok, Scarlett.” He nodded whilst taking notes.
“I was sent out with them a few times until he had his full trust in me, then he started putting me out on my own. They always told me that the person that was my target had done something horrible to someone else. I was always fed the same lines that made me think I was doing the right thing.” I sipped my coffee as it was still roasting.
“Go on.” He said.
“You know my brother was my person I would speak to from a very young age, but after him getting taken away from me, I guess I just closed up and couldn’t speak to anyone,” I said.
I continued with my story, not missing anything out. I hated myself as I told him because I couldn’t believe the things I did. Maybe they should lock me up and throw away the key because that is what I deserve.
“Is that why you became a paramedic, to help people?” he asked.
“Yes, in a way. I have always wanted to help people, and I know that may be hard to believe after the things I have done, but it is true,”
“How many people did you kill?” he asked.
“I don’t know the exact number, but even one was too many,” I whimpered. Then Brendan reached over and stopped recording.
“I can see this is upsetting you, Scarlett, so let’s take a break. We can both finish our coffees, and we can start back up in fifteen minutes.” He smiled.
This is hard, but it is what I need to do. It is time the truth came out. I am done with lies!