Confessions of a Modern U’Makoti(BWWM)

Confession #11

Confession #11

When I envisioned meeting Aaron’s parents I always imaged myself wearing a sundress with sandals. A classic look with my hair in a head wrap and minimal make up. It would have a been a lovely dinner at some upscale restaurant and Iwould order something that didn’t make me look like some fat cow nor would it make me seem too uptight. The conversation would be light hearted and I would make jokes and we would all laugh.

I just wished some dreams would become a reality.

On our last and only full day in Hermanus Aaron – as always – woke up at an ungodly hour. And I stayed in our warm sheets basking in the heat. And when I did finally wake up, I found a stout dark skinned woman humming lowly as she rearranged something in the bathroom. She wore her maid’s uniform with a head wrap and wore out Tommy takies.

“Oh sorry, Madam did I wake you?” She spoke with her Xhosa accent layering each word heavily.

“No, I need to wake up anyway. I’m Thati, and you are Ma?”

She smiled at words as I extended out my hand. Her face creased with wrinkles but clearly not enough to let up her age, but the musky rim around her brown eyes gave me an idea that she was older than me.

“ Patience Sissie,” She lowered her head as we shook hands. It unnerved me considering our age gap. She allowed me to brush my teeth as she busied herself with making the bed. A task I insisted I would do for myself but she stubbornly refused.

“Sissie?” She spoke hesitantly, calling me before I left the room.

“Yes, Ma?”

“Are you and Aaronjie… “ Her words seemed to fade and to save her from further humiliation I nervously nodded my head in agreement. A bright smile seemed to grow on her small round face. She said nothing further but I could tell she was happy with my answer.

I quickly descended down the stair but paused when I heard not just one but multiple voices. Guess who’s having a party. Before I could retreat back up the stairs I heard.

“Well hello there.” I didn’t recognize the voice, but it was a friendly baritone.

I could either run up the stairs, retreating into the inquisitive looks given to me by Ma Patience or greet whoever called from the bottom of the stairs. This isn’t your house, you can’t just run away from people! So I took the inventible high road and slowly turned on my heels.

The man at the bottom of the stairs had a warm smiled surround by a white beard with drooping soft eyes and almost white grey hair. With beer belly big enough to compete with any black man’s. He was taller than me, almost as tall as my father.

“You coming to breakfast dear?” He asked as though he always found black women dressed in silk robes walking around his house. My words seemed to get caught in my throat, I just nodded as I walked down the stairs shamefully.

“The name’s Wessel dearie, you must be Thati.” This is Wessel – Aaron’s stepdad.

“Yes,” I finally croaked out. “A pleasure to meet you.” I spoke nervously outstretching my hand.

“The pleasure is all mine.” We shook hands. The corners of his lips tugged upwards as though he was trying to keep something in. “Aaron’s description doesn’t do you justice.” He was studying me intently.

“Aaron talks about me?” And for some odd reason I found this information flattering. Of course he talks about you! You’re his girlfriend.

“He makes our ears bleed.” He joked as we reached the dining room table. A table which was completely empty yesterday was now filled to the edges with food. Fruit, juice, pancakes and beacon galore. My mouth was salivating.

“Wessel dear, I don’t know if she wants coffee or…” In the few conversation Aaron and I had about his parents he never once mentioned the oxygen tank that came along with his mother. He described as her as a firecracker perfectionist with a sharp tongue. The stout woman had her thick greying hair falling just below her jawline. Her skin was fair but ruined by her wrinkles. And yet the small tubes leading into her nose could not disguise the fact that she was once a beauty.

“Oh she fine with coffee. I’m not really that picky.” I announced with a smile. A smiled played on the older woman’s thin lips.

“You’re Thati?” She beamed through every pore of her body.

“Well that’s what my ID says. If you guys have any other suggestions I’m open to them. And you’re Maria?” I said. This is not the time for joke. But the pair laughed and Maria’s face stained with a content smile.

“Indeed I am. My son’s been trying to hide you from us, but I made sure our doctor’s appointment ended early. I just had to meet the girl who Aaron’s grown a soft spot for.” She spoke delightedly.

“Oh I wouldn’t call it a soft spot-“ She interrupted me.

“Trust me dear, it is. Now the trick is, make sure he doesn’t know you have a soft spot for him. There’s no fun in the relationship if the woman doesn’t have some kind of leverage over her partner.” She winked re-entering the kitchen.

I was puzzled, either join Wessel -who sat at the table while reading a newspaper - or join the woman in the kitchen who seemed to be in rush with an oxygen tank following behind her on its small wheels. I followed Maria, she was the flame and I was the moth.

“What did Aaron tell you about us?”

She was shifting between the two cupboards, one with the fancy china that is usually only used for important guests and the other with shiny new sliver wear. She threw her words over shoulder as she busied herself with the cups.

“That boy barely says anything. You know sometimes I think his mute. It’s terrible, I can’t fulfil my role as a nosey Portuguese mother if my son stays this way. “ She muttered to herself, I tried to hold in a chuckle. “Anyway, he simply said you were very special to him. Making you sound like a child with special needs. He didn’t prepare me for this!” She gestured to me. Did she just…

Her eyes scanned me one more time before giving me a pleased smile. “I mean look at you! Gorgeous! Your breasts are like mine in the sixties, I’ll tell you something no one told me. Gravity takes full effect after the second child. “ And this time I couldn’t help it I laughed, she joined me. Although the cough at the end of her laughter made me nervous she assured me not to worry.

“Ma, I couldn’t find the jam but Thati literally eat anything except avocadoes. I think we’re….” Aaron’s words stopped as soon as he walked into the kitchen. “Morning Tiger, “He approached me but I quickly turned on my heels.

He left me to the lions, without my dream outfit and make-up or even the ice breaker joke that made them fall in love with me, not to mention the fact that he didn’t tell me about his mother’s illness.

“We need to talk.” And this time both Wessel and Maria laughed. Aaron’s face fell.

The only peaceful place we could find was out on the patio and even then we could see Maria shamelessly eavesdropping with Patience trying to be more discreet about it. Aaron was pouting, I’d soon learnt that was something he did when he knew he did something stupid. But neither his pouty expression nor his long silky hair blowing with the breeze could save him now.

“When were you planning on telling me your parents would be joining us for breakfast!” I whispered harshly.

“I didn’t think they would actually make it! We were supposed leave before they arrived and then we’d have dinner with them. “

“Aaron we’ve been dating for like three months! You can’t expect me to meet your parents so quickly. “

“But I met your parents?”

“By mistake and look where that’s got us!” It slipped. I never let stuff like that slip but it did and Aaron looked almost wounded.

“What do you mean; Look where that’s got us?”

I was treading on thin ice. “No, we’re not having that discussion. We’re talking about why you cornered me into meeting your – as amazing as they – parents. Why couldn’t we talk about this? ”

“I think we should be having that discussion.” He talked towards me at a dangerously low pace.

“Why didn’t you tell me your mom’s sick? Why did you downplay the size of this vineyard? Why didn’t you tell me you own a gallery? Why are you always omitting stuff? Answer those questions then we’ll have that discussion!”

He paused in his tracks, releasing a heavy sigh. “Thati-“

“No, I know you. You’re not going to answer any of those questions. So just explain to me, what’s the rush? Why do I have to meet your parents now? Why did you corner me? “ I was so frustrated at this point that my eyes began to burn with tears of frustration. Not Tumi! Aaron! “Why- “

“Because I see something here! A real relationship. I feel something for you. And maybe this is all a game to you, Thati. Something to keep you busy until Daddy finds you a rich guy to fu- “ I slapped him. This time my vision went blurry and my hand burnt from the sensation of his warm skin against mine.

“Don’t you dare question my feelings for you.”

“What are your feelings for me?” He asked, but I remained silent. I didn’t know. I couldn’t find the words to articulate them. It would mean hurting Aaron if I came clean about my strong feelings for him. He sighed.

“That’s what I thought. “

We stood in an eerie silence for moment before I spoke.

“I think I’m gonna go now.”

“I think you should.”

I quickly rushed into the house, bypassing the bystanders before locking myself in my room. With my blurry vision I quickly packed my clothes, calling a number I only called under emergency situations. I heard a knock at the door but ignored it.

“Hey, I’m on a vineyard in Hermanus; Willows Wine Village. Can you get me a car and a ticket on the next plan out of Cape Town.”

“What are you doing in Hermanus?”

“Hlogi please. Just be my big brother without asking questions for once in your short bald-headed life.”

“Fine, you owe me. Be ready in 10.”

When I got downstairs, Wessel and Maria sat at the table nibbling slowly on the abundance of food in front of them. Maria was the first to take note of the bags I lugged down the stairs. Aaron was nowhere in sight.

“You’re leaving as well? Don’t let what Aaron said to you get to you.” She approached me holding onto my hand weakly.

“Maria’s right. It was just a lover’s quarrel, give it a few. You two, will be inseparable within the next hour.” Wessel joined in, wrapping an arm around his wife’s shoulders.

“Within the next hour I’ll be on a flight out of here. “ Their faces fell. “I’m sorry, I ruined your breakfast. It was lovely meeting you two.” I gave the pair each a warm smile. Wessel gave me an awkward side hug while Maria went in for the kill engulfing me in a tight squeeze. She lowly whispered into my ear.

“Its Chronic Bronchitis, he doesn’t like telling people that his mom’s dying.” I was stunned by her honesty giving her an even tighter hug, before pulling away.

“Bye you two.”

I heard the car honk from the front door. With one last forced smile, I fled from the elderly pair’s house. What was usually an hour drive to Cape Town only took half an hour. The speed at which the driver was driving at was inhuman, he had me grabbing onto the seatbelt just to feel a bit safer.

And when I got to the airport I felt like a mess. I’d checked in wearing a pair of jeans that weren’t ironed and a plain white t-shirt with a coffee stain on the collar. I’d SMSed Hlogi a thank you message. How he managed to get me a ticket none the less first class would always be one of my brother’s unsolved mysteries.

And while awaiting my plane and awaiting a call from Aaron my father called. I rolled my eyes considering not answering the phone. But I had to tell him the news. He won.

“Papa?”

“My patience has worn thin, Nthatile. “

“Well, you have nothing to worry about. We just broke up.” And with that I began to sob, I sobbed uncontrollably. Sobbing so hard spectators stared and kids pointed at me asking their mothers why a crazy black women was crying in an airport.

“I-I’m sorry, Naledinyana. “

“No, you’re not.” I grew sick of his tone and before he could say anything further. I hung up. Switching off my phone.