Brian's Heart

Chapter 7

I anticipated the day ahead.

The first person I wanted to see was Amaya. She refused to stay the night, giving me some made-up excuse about how she could not sleep over. We both knew her mother had no issue with her being over at my place on a school night, although.

Our parents knew a long time ago how attached to the hip we were. Countless nights we’d be caught sneaking out just to hang out with one another until Amaya’s mother thought it was the best decision to talk to my parents about how to solve the issue.

The conclusion from those long conversations and the pleas of two young kids were that we would get to have unlimited sleepovers. My parents and Amaya’s mother even planned vacations together just so the others wouldn’t be left out.

But still she lied. It was quite unsettling; Amaya never lies to me. My mind said something was up, and I needed to get to the bottom of it while my heart replayed the feeling of those fireworks exploding every time I thought of her. The hard part was finally over, and now I can tell her exactly what has been eating me up these years, yearning for some sort of sign she felt the same way and now I do.

Amaya likes it when my blonde hair is gelled back neatly with a piece loose in the front of it. She’d say she liked the clean look, but the misbehaved piece suited me. Somehow, it fits my personality, how I never followed rules.

Deciding I was going to do just that today instead of my usual wild locks behaving however they desired, I opted for what I knew would bring her attention my way. Placing my van sneakers on and a battered T-shirt with vulgar writing on the back, I was ready to go.

I checked myself in the mirror several times before finally heading off to school. I needed this to be perfect. Getting the girl of my dreams and keeping her is what was only on my mind.

I plan to take her out on a lunch date and share with her what I've been feeling all these years. Today is the day that Amaya Cooper officially becomes my GIRLFRIEND. I never thought I’d say those words and here we are today. My smile hasn’t faded since six o’clock this morning.

On the way to school, I made a little pit stop at the local market and acquired a dozen tulips for her. She wasn’t your usual roses type of girl. She was unique and more thought out.

Once at school, I made my way to Amaya's locker where she stood placing her books inside. Before walking up to her, I made sure that my breath was minty fresh, my hair was still neatly gelled back to perfection, and the bouquet of tulips was gently placed behind my back as a surprise for her. This was all new for me; I had never treated a female like that. I don’t know if what I’m doing is correct, but from watching all the romcoms she loves I took a few notes here and there.

As I readied myself one last time, Greg approached. I was confused but made my way to her side. I was almost there until I watched her place a kiss onto his lips. The action caused me to halt in my steps.

My heart dropped, and my mood changed from that airy feeling and replaced it with hurt and betrayal. She kissed Greg, but why!

"Maya" was all I could make out. She broke away from Greg and looked at me with sorrowful eyes. My heart hammered inside my chest when realization dawned in on me.

I was used.

"Brian, Uh... you're at school early. Wassup?" She wiped her mouth and stood beside Greg.

I eyed them both for a moment before I felt my hand shaking. I wanted so bad to knock those glasses off his f*****g face.

What am I saying, I am going to knock those glasses off his f*****g face.

I didn't say a word to Amaya, instead I punched Greg Square in the face and watched his body fall to the ground at the impact.

"Greg! Baby, are you okay?" I laughed hysterically at the way she called him baby and ran to his side. I knew this would happen, but I fell for her trick like all the other guys have.

I should've known she was just upset last night, looking for someone to become her rebound instead I let my feelings get into the way.

"So now he's your baby? You weren't saying that last night."

"Don't you dare! I'll deal with you later" She gritted through clenched teeth before helping Greg up and walking away with him.

“What did I do?” The wimp cried out. The sound of his voice made me uneasy. I wanted so badly just to kick his ass properly, but being in school and having all these witnesses wouldn’t do me good.

“You didn’t do anything wrong. You just made me realize how much of a player you really are. Two of the prettiest girls in school want you. Isn’t that right, Maya,” I chuckled.

Throwing the bouquet at her feet, I turned on my heels and retracted back into the school parking lot.

I couldn't be here or else I think I might kill that four-eyed freak.

How could she pick him over me?!

I hit my sterling wheel repeatedly as I thought about how stupid I must have looked to her back there.

"Of course she wouldn't want me. She wants the good guys, and I'm just a f*****g delinquent to her!" I screamed at myself as I punched the wheel once more.

I reversed and dashed out of the school zone. I needed to be in the privacy of my own home.

I dashed home, not even caring if my parents left for work.

"Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! Why did I ever think that she wanted to be with me!" I said to myself.

My feelings were hurt, but my dignity was crushed. I had no chance with her to start with, so why believe it now, a stupid little kiss was not going to make it all better. I could've been the one treating her the way she should be, but instead she picked Greg over me.

I knew kissing her was a mistake, but I risked it anyway. I did this to myself.

I hopped out of my car and slammed the door shut, storming into my home and upstairs to my room. I sat on the floor and looked at myself in the mirror. The sight before me disgusted me, was a crumpling mess.

I didn't know tears streaming down my face.

I don't cry, so why do I feel the need to because some girl rejected me? Amaya isn't just some girl to me. She's the love of my life ever since I've met her. I made sure that no one bothered her, I was her protector and her friend every time she needed me to be, but I wasn’t enough.

"Why am I not enough?" I questioned my reflection. The sight of myself in this broken state angered me. My fist collided with the mirror, causing it to shatter into pieces. Blood seeped onto the floor. I paid no mind to the pain, the one in my chest was unbearably prominent.

"Why can't I be the one you choose, why don't you want me, why can't you love me Amaya?" I laid upon the ground in the broken glass and stared off into the distance mumbling the same words again and again.

"Why can't you see how much I love you, Amaya?"