Escape My Lips (3)
1046 Words
Chapter 6: Escape My Lips (3)
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Edward silently sat there and watched as the other began eating. “What do you think about the food?” He asked after a while.
“It’s really good~” Mason said, it was a first for him to enjoy such a fancy restaurant and such good food.
“I’m glad you like it.” Edward said with a smile on his face. He seemed to be enjoying himself enough just looking at the other.
“Edward…” Mason finally spoke up after thinking for a while…
‘I might as well ask him.’ Mason thought to himself. “Do you have anything you’d like as a gift?”
“I can’t think of anything…” Edward said as he looked up at his lover. “I already have everything I’ve ever wanted.” He spoke gently while his piercing gaze seemed to make the other feel hotter by the minute.
“That’s not really the answer I was looking for…” Mason muttered as if disappointed by the other’s repetitive responses.
“If I really had to choose something as a present…” Edward began thinking and went silent for a bit.
Mason’s raised his eyes to look at his lover in anticipation of his answer. ‘Come on just say something you’d like. A new watch? A trip somewhere? Just say anything so I can get it for you!’ He thought to himself, he was desperately searching for a present that would make his lover truly happy.
After a while of silent thinking, Edward finally spoke: “I’d like you to tell me you love me.” He said with a gentle smile planted on his face.
Even thought his request seemed simple, Mason was having a hard time processing what he just heard. “You want me… to say that?” He asked in a hesitant voice.
“Yes, it’s what I really want as a gift.” Edward said happily as he looked at his lover’s confused expression.
“Haven’t I said it before?” Mason asked, though he seemed a bit afraid of the other’s answer.
“Never.” Edward quickly replied.
Now Mason was the one that fell into deep thought. ‘Have I really never said that to him? That I… no… I definitely said it… right?’ He began raking his brain to try and remember a single instance in which he spoke those words to Edward.
Then the author finally managed to remember something he said a while ago to his lover:
‘I don’t know if I like you but I’ll try to be with you if that’s what you want…’
Surprisingly enough, those words were the closest thing to a confession that Mason had ever made.
‘I really haven’t said it… I’ve never said it…’ Mason thought to himself, but as confused as he was he had no idea why it was so difficult for him to say those words to his lover.
“You realized you haven’t said it, right?” Edward asked with a small smirk on his face as he looked at his lover who was obviously flustered.
“I mean… We’ve been together for so long… Do we really need to say it… to know how we feel?” Mason asked as he blushed even harder than before.
“I want to hear it from you. After all, I’ve told you how much I love you, so many times.” Edward said, a bit disappointed at his lover’s avoidance of those three simple words.
Mason began remembering the multiple times he’s heard his lover say those words…
*That time when Edward held his lover in his hands and begged him not to leave him: “…Don’t ever leave me… I love you…” Edward said pleadingly as he tightened his grip…*
*The time when Edward found out he was the one that took Mason’s virginity:“It’s fine… I’m just so happy to know I was your first… I was the one to embrace someone so beautiful first…” Edward said with a sincere voice as he embraced Mason in his arms once again. He then leaned in to the man’s ear and whispered in a low voice. “…I love you…”*
*Even on regular occasions like when Mason doubted one of his novels. Edward would always throw reassuring words his way: “I don’t think your dream is that far fetched… I really like your books.” Edward said as he sat up and turned to look at his boyfriend’s eyes. “…and I love you.”*
Each time he heard it, it was hammered into his brain so hard as if leaving him no room to refute the other’s words. It was a fact that Edward loved and cherished Mason dearly. But in this situation Mason still had a difficult time saying those simple three words.
‘He’s… said it a lot before… More times than I can count…’ Mason thought to himself.
“It’s alright if you can’t say it yet… It doesn’t have to be now.” Edward said as he smiled and touched his lover’s hand. “Just someday…”
“O…okay…” Mason agreed and they went back to eating their dinner silently. The problem was that it made the author even more guilty because he was not able to give the single thing his lover wanted.
‘What should I do…’ Mason wondered, even he had no idea why it was so difficult to tell the other he loved him. ‘Should I just blurt it out?’ He wondered. ‘No, it wouldn’t be romantic nor would it mean anything…’
Over and over the man wondered to himself how exactly to express his affections towards the other. Mason knew he really liked Edward, but he couldn’t say it… The words I love you, would prove to be a bigger issue than he would have expected…
- Writer
