Our Stupid Feelings

Chapter 9: Bringing Her Dinner

-Kat-

Upon arriving home, an unexpected wave of fatigue washed over me, though perhaps it was no surprise given my recent bout of sleepless nights. Overthinking and under-sleeping had become the norm, especially with someone occupying my thoughts so persistently. I definitely needed some physical release to alleviate the tension. However, as I stepped into my apartment, I was once more taken aback to find a figure seated in the dimness.

“What the f*ck?” I exclaimed before turning on the light. “Jax!”

“Surprise, kitten,” he teased.

“I am going to need those keys back!” I told him harshly.

“No can do.”

“What the hell are you doing here?”

“Well,” he began as he got up from the couch.

Sh*t, he looked good. Even if he was just wearing a simple t-shirt and jeans, he looked so handsome.

“Since you wouldn’t come for dinner at my house, I thought I would bring dinner to you.”

“You... did what?” I inquired, confused.

He gestured toward my kitchen, signaling for me to go in there, and so I did. On the small dining table, there was food, a little steam rising from it, indicating it was still hot, and... a candle? It was a small one, and I was pretty sure it was one of mine. I turned to look at Jax again, who just gave me one of his teasing smiles.

“Hungry?” he asked.

“W-Why did you...”

“I told you,” he said. “Since you wouldn’t come to me, I brought dinner to you.”

I couldn’t stop myself from smiling as we sat down and began to eat. The food tasted delicious, or maybe I was just really hungry. I couldn’t decide.

“You made this?” I questioned.

He shook his head. “I can’t cook. Not even to save my life.”

I chuckled. Despite spending a lot of time together before ending things, we didn’t really know that much about each other.

“I can’t say I’m a very skilled cook, but I can make something edible,” I told him.

“Maybe you should cook for me someday,” he suggested.

I shrugged, looking at my food. “Maybe.”

“That’s not a no,” he pointed out, making me look at him again.

I shook my head and laughed. “It’s not a yes either!”

“I think I’m getting you to lean toward it though,” he teased.

“Don’t get cocky,” I warned him, which just made him smile.

“Can’t run from me forever,” he reminded me.

“If I’m determined enough, I think I can,” I replied, not liking that he told me what I couldn’t do. It just automatically made me want to defy him.

He smiled smugly, knowing what he had triggered in me. “Nah, you’ll want to be caught by me.”

“You think so?” I asked. “Have I given any indication that I want you here?”

“Well, have you kicked me out yet?”

I opened my mouth to answer, but we both knew I hadn’t. After seeing this little dinner he had set up, I forgot to be mad that he had once again broken into my apartment.

“Yet!” I shot back. “There is still time.”

“No, you want me here. Why deny yourself all this, kitten?” he inquired, gesturing to his whole body.

I leaned back in my chair, crossed my arms, and looked him up and down before shrugging. “Not impressed.”

“Liar!”

We shared a laugh, both surprised that we could simply sit down and enjoy a normal, casual dinner without arguing or feeling the urge to tear each other's clothes off.

“You’re always impressed by me,” he said.

I shook my head. “No, I just made you believe I was so I could continue to get in your pants,” I teased.

He put a hand to his heart, acting offended. “You were just using me for my unbelievably good body?” he asked, overdramatically.

I shrugged again. “What can I say?” I taunted. “A girl has needs.”

He smiled at me, and his eyes slowly ran down my body.

“That she has,” he purred, his voice turning darker. “And I always loved to please them.”

Even if he wasn’t touching me, his voice felt like a caress, running over my skin and leaving goosebumps everywhere.

“It’s nice of you to do this,” I admitted, picking up my fork again.

“Bringing you dinner?”

I nodded.

“More like the bare minimum,” he chuckled.

I shrugged once more.

“No one has ever really done that for me,” I admitted. When I looked at him instead of my food, I saw he looked rather shocked.

“No?”

“Why would they? I haven’t been in a relationship in a very long time, and I can’t really say any of them I have been in has been very successful.”

“You didn’t end up dating Luke?” he questioned.

“You thought I did?”

He nodded, and I realized then how bad it had looked from his perspective.

“No, we weren’t dating,” I confirmed.

“You just spent so much time together.”

“We were friends before we started sleeping together,” I reminded him. “We share the same friends. Of course, we spent a lot of time together.”

“Can’t blame me for thinking you might have started dating him instead,” he countered.

"I genuinely don't, and I apologize if it came across that way," I reassured him, observing the surprise flicker across his expression as he registered the sincerity in my tone.

“You really are,” he commented.

“You think I am that cold-hearted?” I asked.

That made him look a bit guilty, probably remembering our fight and how he said I was incapable of loving anyone. But maybe he was right.

“I... I can lose my temper a bit easily,” he admitted. “I didn’t mean—”

“Yeah, you did, but that’s fine.”

“I didn’t, Kat!” he told me a bit more firmly.

But I wasn’t sure I believed him. Often, the things we truly think can easily come out in a fight, where suddenly the rules of how to behave get blurred.