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1068 Words
I lightly carressed my tummy. Feeling the little bump on my stomach. Seven months from now I will become a mother already. Thinking of it makes me wanna feel afraid band scared yet excited at the same time.
I fee scared because I don't know if I can handle it all alone. I don't know if I will be able to carry out my obligations and responsibilities as a mother. Not that I don't believe myself and the things that I can do. I know I can do it all, but we're talking about me and the baby already. It's not that simple having and raising it.
What if I can't raise it well?
I heaved out a deep sighed as I shook my head. I shouldn't think of things like that. That's too stressful and the pediatrician said that I should not think those kinds of things that's makes me stress as it trigger miscarriage.
When I was finished fixing myself, I decided to go along my way even though it's too early. I still have an hour but if I'll stay at home any longer, laziness will catch me again and I will definitely decide not to go. So yeah!
I started to trail of my destination. I decided to just walk to kill time. Besides, it's not too hot because it's cloudy. It's a good day to have a walk.
As I am walking along the streets, I roamed my eyes around the area. Being here brought so many changes it my life for the past two months. It gave me strength and had me the courage to do things. I wasn't expecting it also that I could stay here this long. I thought I'm gonna come back after a week or so. But I was wrong. Add to it that I found out of me being pregnant. That's when I really starts to have courage already.
I look around and saw people walking and I saw that there were some of them who also is pregnant but what makes us different with each other is that they had their partner with them and they are happily walking on the road and some were seating on a bench.
And looking at them makes me feel awful. Not to myself but for my coming baby. I suddenly felt a feeling of guiltiness. She will be born in this world without a father.
That feels sad. I was born without having to hold my parents as I grow up and it was definitely not good. It really affects one's life as person as you grow. It changes the way you forsee and look at life and I don't want my child to see it that way. I don't want it to be like me. As much as possible I want to give the world to her all by myself but I know that if time comes, she will ask more. She will starts to ask things when her curiosity tells her to do so.
I shook my head once more. I'm thinking of stressful things again. Even though I told myself not to, but I can't helo as I see so many things that triggers it which makes me wanna think of it more.
As I walked along, I did not notice someone was walking along my way and we bump into each other which made me move a little backwards. I got so scared as it had a little bit impact and might affect the baby.
"Hey! Watch where you are going!" I said with irritation as I carressed my tummy with my hand without looking at the person who bumped me.
"Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to-----" the man apologized but was cut off in his mid-sentence. "Blaire?"
I stilled in my position when the person caller my name. I slowly look at that person and I was shock. "Toni." I called out his name.
Toni Domingo. One of Isaac's closest friends who knew about our relationship.
He look at me with confusion. "What are you doing here. Uhm I mean, are you here for a vacation? Are you with Sac?" He ask as he look at me and he noticed that I was touching my belly.
I shook my head but I was confused too. Did he not know what happened? Toni lives here but whenever there's news, his friends always tells him about it. Just like my relationship with Isaac and he even met me in the Philippines so he knew me.
"Uhm. Uhm. I wasn't with him." I answered.
"Huh? That's odd." he said. "He never lets you travel alone though." he said and look at my belly again.
My heart was beating so fast. My two months baby bump is showing but because I'm wearing a shirt it's not too visible.
"Did I hit you that hard?" he ask worriedly.
I shook my head. "uhm, no. It's fine." I answered as I force a smile. "Anyways, I gotta go. I have something important to go." I said and was about to leave but he stop me.
"Uh wait. can we meet sometimes? I mean do you have work here? Can we meet sometimes. I haven't seen and talk to you guys this past few months. I've been calling Sac but he never answers and the team is was too busy." he said.
So maybe that's the reason that he did not know that Isaac and I broke up already.
I shook my head and smiled awkwardly. "Uhm, sure? We can talk about it next time though. I'm just a little bit in a hurry with my appointment today and I gotta hurry." I said.
Even though I wanted it walk but seems like I can't because Toni would would with me. But I decided to take a taxi instead. thankfully, I saw one and called it.
"I'll just hit you a call, okay? I'm really sorry because I'm busy." I lied and jump in the taxi.
"Wait----" he was about to say something when I shut the door closed and told the driver to go.
As soon as the taxi left, I took a heavy deep breath. s**t!! That was so close!
As the car moves to it's destination, I had thought of something. Toni doesn't know of anything? But that's impossible. Isaac tells him everything.
What does Isaac planning?
- Writer
