Chapter 4: Done Enough
1333 Words
-Megan-
I got cleaned up in my bathroom and dressed again, while Nathan waited in my bedroom. He was sitting on the bed, reminding me of the time when we had been at my house at the white party, and he had been sitting on my bed too, studying the room, getting a glimpse into the young Megan I had once been. Back then he had looked a lot more put together. Right now, he seemed on the verge of a breakdown.
“Come here,” he beckoned.
My body moved on its own, and I walked over to him. He placed his hands on my hips, guiding me on top of him, so I straddled him, and then he wrapped his arms around me. His eyes shone with lust still. The quickie on the couch was barely enough, and I could only agree, but we couldn’t continue this.
“We can’t,” I whispered.
“We can,” he asserted, not wanting to listen to this.
“This changes nothing.”
“I disagree.
“You don’t say,” I retorted and rolled my eyes.
“Megan, I love you. Do I have to continue to say it until you hear me?” he inquired.
“I hear you.”
He lifted an eyebrow.
“No, you don’t,” he contradicted.
“I do. You think I would have let you f*ck me on the couch if I didn’t love you back?” I challenged him.
“Then what is the problem?”
“I don’t trust you. We can’t be married if we don’t have trust,” I stated.
He sighed and leaned his head against my chest. He took a deep breath, almost like he was inhaling me, and I let him stay just like that, without saying anything. I gave him a moment to just think it all through. He had to see we didn’t work.
“I want you,” he whispered.
"I want you too, but if I can’t trust you, then how are we different than Brooke and you?” I posed.
He lifted his head and looked at me almost annoyed.
“Are you really comparing us to the relationship I had with Brooke?” he retorted.
“You didn’t trust her!” I stated and pushed away from him. “And look what happened!”
“This is different! Brooke used me all the time. Of course, there was no trust!”
“There isn’t trust between us either!” I asserted.
“Megan—"
“Just go back. I am sure you need to take care of the company or something,” I suggested, and looked away from him.
“What?” The tone of his voice made me look at him again. He appeared as confused as I felt.
“What?” I repeated. “Just because you are the boss now, doesn’t mean you can just skip work.”
“Have you been living under a rock?” he asked as he stood up.
“No,” I replied, but it sounded more like a question.
What the hell was he talking about? I knew I had stayed away from social media and such, but I wasn’t sure if I would classify that as living under a rock.
“Megan, I am not in charge of my grandfather’s company.”
I looked at him for a few seconds, just processing his words.
“But... No, your grandfather would never let Shane inherit. He is an idiot.”
“I don’t deny that,” he acknowledged. “And he did choose me.”
“Exactly!” I exclaimed.
“But I turned the offer down.”
My heart froze in my chest, as his words ran on a loop inside my head. I tried to understand what he was saying, but it was like I couldn’t... He had fought so hard to be his grandfather’s heir, and now he was telling me, he had turned it all down. But why?
“What?” I exclaimed. “That makes no sense.”
A small smile spread on his lips.
“I just realized what was more important,” he explained.
“More important?”
“Finding you.”
Now my heart picked up the pace. Nathan took a step closer, which made me retreat. It was like he was just taking up all the space suddenly. I needed some room, but he didn’t allow that and eventually cornered me against the wall behind me.
“And it was a good thing I did, or I would have gotten those stupid papers handed to me,” he said.
“I...” I had no words. I had no idea what to even think or feel. He had given up everything he had fought so hard for, just for me. I kind of felt bad now, but also very flattered.
“I can’t believe you did that,” I whispered.
“I am not even sure I actually wanted to be the boss,” he admitted. “Too much stress.”
“No, you wanted it,” I insisted. “I can’t believe you gave it to Shane.”
“What? You want me to take it?” he asked, confused.
“I don’t think you should have done this for me... I...”
“What the hell else can I do, Megan? Seriously! Tell me, I will do it!”
I shook my head, holding up my hands.
“That is not what I meant,” I clarified.
He looked at me with confusion.
“I... I didn’t mean it like that. I just I am not sure I am worth giving up so much. I mean, you forced yourself to get married to me, just to get a chance for the big seat,” I explained.
The smile returned to his lips, and he reached out, pushing some of my dark brown hair behind my ear.
“As I mentioned, I’m not sure I even wanted it,” he mentioned. “I’m not even sad, actually.”
“No?”
He shook his head. “The only thing I’m sad about is that you left.”
A stabbing feeling of guilt hit me. I hated that I had left in the middle of the night. I hated that I felt I had to turn away and end things between us. I knew it was a coward’s move, just leaving, but if I waited until he woke up, I knew he would convince me to stay.
“Come home,” he urged.
“Nathan...”
“Why not? You heard me. The company isn’t even mine! Now it never will be,” he insisted. “I know I entered this marriage for stupid reasons, and I hated you had to hear all of that from Brooke, but I changed. I know you couldn’t trust me before my grandfather retired, but now he has! So. Come. Home!”
He was right. His grandfather had retired now, but it only left me even more confused. I had signed my name on the divorce papers today. Nathan might have torn them up, but I had still signed them. Was there a part of me that still wanted to be free of Nathan?
“You’re quiet,” he noted.
“I’m... thinking,” I told him.
“Do I really have to continue to prove myself?”
I shook my head. No, he had done enough. He had done more than enough, but how did I exactly feel?
“I just... I need some space,” I said and pushed away from the wall, snaking my way around him.
“Megan, please. Let us stop this. Okay? Just come home, and we can work it all out.”
“I’m not sure I can just leave!” I told him.
“Why not?”
“Because... because...”
“Megan? I’m home!”
“Damn it.”
- Writer
