His Forever 2-His girlfriend

11

Alisa.

"Bess," a warm voice called softly as I tossed and turned on the bed, searching desperately for an exit from this nightmare. Sure enough, the anxious call of my best friend was enough to bring me back to the real world.

It was not the first time that Ron had pulled me out of a horrific dream state, and once again, I was thankful for having him. Squinting at the rays of sunlight filtering into the room, I sat up on the bed, trying to swallow through my parched throat.

As if he could read my mind, Ron held out a glass of water to me. "Here, hydrate."

With a grateful look, I downed the water in a few quick gulps, feeling a little more revived. The bed creaked as Ron took a seat next to me. "How're you feeling now?"

"Like s**t," I said honestly, looking away with a little more sharpness than I intended to. I noticed the pieces of glass were no longer on the floor and it helped soothe my fury at Ron. After our encounter this morning and the punch Drey had left on his face, I knew he probably looked worse. A beat of silence stretched for a second without so much as looking at each other.

As the seconds slowly started to develop into a minute, I realized how stupid it was doing the silent treatment thing with each other. After all Ron and I had been through together, it was not how we operated. It was also not our first fight and just like the other times, the best way to resolve it was to talk to each other.

Ron must have been thinking the same thing because as I asked what the time was he started to say something too.

With a small smile, I gestured for him to go first. Nodding, he sighed and took my hand in his, "I'm so sorry for being that way to you earlier,"

"Oh, you mean when you were a d**k to me?" I bit back, resisting the urge to glare at him.

He winced as I used that rare term on him, then again, it was not every day Ron was as mad as I saw him earlier. "Yeah that. I was only worried about you Alisa."

"Worried about what?" I threw my hands in the air, "you knew I was with Drey all weekend..."

"And I was about to send a search party or come get you myself." he cut me short.

This time, I shot him an icy glare, "You're lucky you didn't"

"I know. But you can at least try to see things from my perspective bess. I was worried sick through the weekend and when I finally think of  coming to find you myself, I find you kissing..."

"Nearly kissing," I corrected, folding my arms across my chest.

"That's not the point, the point is how can you let him so close to you after all you have gone through in the last two months thanks to that man."

"Don't blame Drey, he had nothing to do with it, I broke up with him remember?"

"And I have watched you get an inch closer to becoming a rubble of tears every day since then!" he cried, "I don't know what he did to you Alisa, but I have never seen you this sad before, not even when..."

I stopped him with a hand up, shaking my head, "don't. Do not even steer this conversation in that direction please."

"I didn't mean to remind you of that or hurt you..."

"Like hell, you didn't." I spat, "You practically accused me of being selfish and stupid."

"No, I said I had never known you to be those, which actually is more of a compliment," he said with a lighter edge.

"It's not f*****g funny," I yelled. "You're my best friend, and that means you get to support me, not tear me down."

"And I will always support you bess. I'm just scared Lisa." he sighed, taking my hand again, "I don't like the shell you have become in the last few months, I want my best friend back and I cannot have her back if you keep letting him hurt you."

How could I make him understand, "Drey is not the one hurting me, I promise Ron. These last few months, I wasn't sad because Drey left me, I was sad because I left him. I hurt him and ended up hurting myself too." I placed my free hand over his, "he loves me and I know it."

"I never said he did not love you," he said, "The fact that he still thinks of you after these months is more than enough proof. Also have you seen my face?" he made a quick gesture around his sore lips, "I got that along with a threat to watch my tone or next time, it might be my nose bleeding."

Despite myself, I giggled, "Drey threatened you?"

"With every bit of seriousness." he gave a tight smile, before slipping back into that worried expression, "I know he loves you, anyone can see that. But believe me when I say that is not nearly enough."

"I would know that." I scoffed, looking away.

"The world where he comes from is very different from ours Alisa. Last time it was a cruel threat on your dad, and that b***h is still alive so who knows what she'll do next. And after that what? An ex-girlfriend? Another psycho, family friend betrothed to him? Another set of mean lies about your life splayed out to everyone that cares to hear? Another painful experience of having to watch you break down every day? Another episode with reporters camping outside our apartment?"

He shook his head gravely, "He may not hurt you, but those around him, the world he comes from—will, I already feel like I've lost a big piece of you just from the first blow. I don't want to risk it."

I had never thought this far before. Ron was not wrong. Even if Drey had handled Sarah, who knew what next was going to be thrown at us. I shuddered just imagining what that could possibly be.

At my silence, Ron continued speaking. "but if you want to go back to him, I would be a terrible best friend for stopping you. As much as I don't like him, I will support you in whatever you want to do, you know that."

I fell back on the bed with a tired sigh, "What if I don't know what I want to do?" My words were more of a whisper to myself because in all honestly, I did not know what I wanted to do. Thoughts muddled into a confusing mess in my head. I loved Drey, without a doubt or any hindrance, I knew that he loved me too. But what I did not know yet was if I was ready to take the risk of going back to Drey. There were going to be hurdles, I could feel it in my bones, but maybe I was strong enough to walk through them with Drey. 

Was I?

"Then that is okay. You do not have to figure it all out in one day." the bed shifted as he relaxed next to me, "and I meant it when I said I will support you in whatever you decide to do."

I stared at the ceiling blankly, "Maybe it'll help if you stopped seeing him as the bad guy."

I could tell he had more to say, but he probably thought better of it. We stayed in silence, watching the ceiling, both of us clearly lost in thought before he dropped the second elephant in the room.

"I called the hospital." Time to get back into the reality of my life, "he really is dying."

"I know," I whispered. "It's still so hard to believe." I wanted to ask him to pinch me and maybe bring me out of this dream state, but I knew this was just as real as the twinge stabbing in my heart every time a picture of dad surfaced in my memory.

"I miss him already," Ron said quietly, "All of my life, he's the only father I have ever really known."

And then the tears I had tried to hold back guggled up to my throat, nearly choking me until I sat upright. Ron sat up too, wrapping his arms around me as I cried into his chest. "What am I supposed to do now? I—I" my words came out jumbled and breathy, "I can't do this. I'm not strong enough. I don't know what I'm going to do without him."

"Do you want to know the first thing he asked when I spoke to him this morning?" Ron asked, running his fingers through my hair.

Sniffling, I pulled away from him. As I wiped my eyes, I saw his glisten with tears too. "What?"

"He asked how your studio was coming along."

"I didn't tell him I was ready to move in yet, but what does that have to do with this?"

"Well because I know what we're not going to do." he wiped his eyes too, "we are not going to sit here and mourn him while he's still living. I love you and I am tired of seeing you so low Lisa."

"That's hard to do when life keeps throwing these things my way."

"I know. But I also know if dad found out he was dying today the first thing he would want to know is that you are going to be fine, that you are going to reach your dreams one after another. That disease is already going to take something precious from us in only a few months, so why should we give it more?" Why should we give it our joy instead of trying to make it the best six months for dad?"

"I don't know how to do that," I admitted in a resigned voice.

"Definitely not in that attitude," Ron gave me a pointed look, before jerking to his feet.

I watched curiously as he ransacked my closet, "what are you doing?"

"What better way to bring joy to dad than to give him the most wonderful news about your latest achievement."

"I have no intentions of even going to the studio today,"

"Oh but you are," his search was rewarded as he held up a mauve suit dad had gotten me for my graduation, just before he had been diagnosed. "You are going to go to the studio and resume as your first day and flip that 'we are open for the business' sign on and then you are going to kill it like a f*****g boss."

"I'm not in the mood for a pep talk right now Ronnie," I threw my legs back on the bed, ready to go back to my usual routine. cry, sleep, wake up, think myself to tears again, and repeat.

"I was not asking," Ron said with an unusual sternness before he took my hand and forced me to my feet. He pushed the suit into my hold and steered me in the direction of the bathroom. I attempted to put up a protest as he made me go inside, but his next words took any fight I had in me. "Do it for dad."

After letting the words sink into me, I gave a slow nod, clutching the suit even tighter to my chest. "For dad."

"That's my best friend. Now take a quick shower while I make you a good luck breakfast," trust my best friend to make me breakfast on such an auspicious day.

"Is that even a thing?" I giggled.

"You'll see," I watched as he turned, heading for the bedroom door. With a small pause, he looked back at me, "Bess?"

"Hmm?"

"Today you soar."

I felt like a weight pulling me down had been lifted off my shoulders as he exited the room. Like I could do anything. Maybe it was false confidence, maybe it would crumble at the sound of yet another bad news. But suddenly, I wanted so badly to get back my life, Grab it greedily with both hands.

Ron was right. Why waste these next few months thinking of what would have been, instead of being the best I could be and making dad the proudest father ever.

Today, I will soar, fly high and rise—for dad.