Beautiful Catastrophe

Chapter Fourteen:

"Kim, we're in a public place now. Let's not get too ahead of ourselves..." Nathan spoke into their kiss.

"Okay." Kim had moved only a centimetre away so that when she spoke, her lips brushed off of his.

In the week that had passed since their first night together, neither were able to stay away from each other. What they had between them was definitely just a physical thing, both understood that completely. Kim had stayed true to her word and was close to him physically but emotionally, she was distant.

Kim had always steered the conversation elsewhere when Nathan brought up things from her past. She felt like she had shared enough with him, maybe even a little too much and now she wanted to refrain from telling him any more. Nathan had noticed this straight away and had managed to not say anything about it, yet. But it had been on the tip of his tongue for a while. He found himself wanting to know more about her. She was an interesting character, a book that was snapped shut every time he went to inspect the pages.

Kim was sitting on a washing machine in a quiet launderette they had stopped at to wash all of their clothes again. Nathan was between her legs, his body close to hers, and his hands were around her waist. He examined her smiling face for a moment as she wrapped her hands around his neck. He then went in for another kiss, this time biting her lip a little at the end.

"I thought we weren't getting too ahead of ourselves?" she raised an eyebrow at him and laughed a little.

"Oh yes, I forgot..." he chuckled at her.

She saw that the clothes in the dryer behind him were finished and so pushed him a little in order to get herself down off of the machine.

"We have things to do Nathan, we can't be standing around all day doing nothing." She said playfully while rolling her eyes.

"We weren't exactly doing nothing." She could sense he was close behind her as she sorted out there clothes.

"Come and help me." Kim muttered, her mind beginning to wander into deadly territory.

She wondered whether she had made the right decision after that night. It seemed as though she was getting too close to Nathan too quickly and she didn't like that side of it, but everything else felt right. Her doubts were easily forgotten with his company but she was unsure whether that was a good or bad thing? Kim hadn't decided yet.

The two packed their things back into the duffle bag together and left the launderette. Kim was overjoyed when Nathan had told her they would reach Las Vegas in a matter of a few short hours. But after her happiness had subsided, she wondered how hard it would be for her when they were back on their way to D.C again.

"Kim." Nathan eyed her curiously while focusing on driving also. She was being particularly quiet that day and he wanted to know why.

"Hmm?" she asked, not turning her head away from the window to even look at him.

"Are you alright?" he placed his hand on her thigh, the contact causing her to finally catch eyes with him.

"I'm fine." Kim nodded, although not really convincing Nathan the slightest bit.

"Why are you being so quiet?" he was genuinely concerned.

"I'm just- thinking. That's all." He took his hand away and put it back on the steering wheel.

"You can talk to me if you want Kim."

"All you want to talk about is Chicago." Kim didn't get angry; she didn't raise her voice or sound in any way hostile.

"Well, that's because I'm interested in your life back in Chicago."

"Interested in how shitty everyone was to me back there?" she scoffed. "That's great." She said sarcastically.

"No, it's not like that. I just think learning about your past shows me what's made you be the person you are right now."

"Wow you're getting deep today aren't you?" Kim tried to joke.

"Why can't we have a serious conversation sometimes?"

"Because they're always about me and all of the pain I've had to go through. All of the terrible things I've had to endure and shitty people I've had to meet. It's never once about you." She had a point but Nathan didn't want to agree with her.

"Kim..."

"What? You wanted a serious conversation so here it is? Why can you just randomly ask me questions about sensitive topics whenever you god damn feel like it but I can never talk about your past and what's happened to you?"

"Because my past is a difficult topic-"

"And mine is too. I'm sorry I don't want to talk about my terrible fiancé or my sly friends or my deceiving father. They aren't difficult things to talk about..." Kim spoke sarcastically.

There was a pause in the car for a minute or two, Nathan was figuring out what to say next while she turned to look out the window again. He was thinking, wondering why he felt less uncomfortable to talk to her about his parents or his childhood than he usually did around others. He had never once let a woman in and also didn't plan to do so either but Kim... she was different and that shook him up a little. In such a short time, he had discovered so many sides to her personality. He had found out her weaknesses, her joys and what made her laugh.

Nathan had come to a realisation that she was a broken girl who had run away from her troubled past, but this didn't make him want to be as far away from her as possible, it only made him feel less alone. Because he too, was broken, he too had a grim past that could not ever be fixed completely. Sometimes being broken wasn't a bad thing, that was something difficult for most to comprehend but Nathan, he understood entirely. More than Kim would ever know.

Yes, they had spent only a couple of weeks together, but in that time Nathan had made a connection with her that he was afraid of telling her about.

"Want to play a game?" he asked, not giving up yet.

"I'm not in the mood for eye spy. The one f*****g time you'll agree to play with me is the worst time possible."

"I never mentioned eye spy Sweetheart."

"What then?" she looked at him then.

"Twenty questions."

"No." Kim said straight away.

"Why not?"

"The same reason I don't want to have a serious conversation with you." His words made him scoff a little.

"We both get twenty questions." This definitely caught her attention, Nathan could physically see the interesting look falling upon her face in a matter of seconds. It made him smile.

"Okay then, you go first."

"What happened to your mom?" he asked. He knew she wasn't dead, it just seemed like she was never really talked about like her father was. Kim thought for a moment before speaking.

"She lives back in Chicago with my father and brothers. She stayed out of the whole feud my father and I had going on before I left. Makes her as bad as the rest in my opinion." She spoke with a straight and truthful tone.

"Oh."

"Have you ever been in a serious relationship with anyone?" Kim had thought about the order her questions were going to go in, her more difficult ones were saved for the middle of the game.

"No."

"No? That's all I get?" he rolled his eyes when she spoke but continued on.

"I can't really say much. I've never been with a girl for more than a couple weeks, nothing has ever been serious." he blatantly lied.

"So you've never been in love?" she asked, coming across a little too eager then.

"Don't waste your questions Kim... Besides- it's my turn." he wanted to get off the topic as quick as possible. Nathan didn't want to think about it anymore.

"Did you get along with your brothers?"

"No. Not that much really. They wanted to be thoroughly involved in the company and got jealous of me sometimes because of how close my father kept me in decision making. Do you have other family you're close to, or friends?"

"Yes, I'm close to my Aunt and Uncle who I lived with when I was sixteen. I have friends too you know, I'm not a loner. Why are you asking, are you looking for a date of some sort from one of them?" he teased.

"Don't waste your questions Nathan." She mimicked him before smiling smugly.

"Did you love Shane?" Kim was surprised by his third question being about her fiancé, she at least thought he would have eased into the topic a little gentler.

"Of course I loved Shane. I would never have agreed to marry him if I didn't." She was quick to answer. The honesty in her words made Nathan feel a little jealous although he knew he was being utterly ridiculous.

"Do you still love him?" she was even more taken aback by the fourth question and stopped to think.

"Are we asking questions in twos now instead of taking turns?"

"Answer me Kim." Nathan's tone was almost cold.

He wanted to know the answer to his question because he could think of no other reason for Kim's constant refusal to talk about him other than the one time they stopped in the car. It was a logical answer, why would anyone want to talk about someone they couldn't have but still wanted. If she loved Shane, she would hate to love him but sometimes people don't get a say in who they love, their heart decides instead.

"No."

"That's all you're going to say?" she had forced him to say more in his answer and now she had to follow her own rules.

"I guess I'm just not fully over what he done to me, that doesn't mean I'm still in love with him. I couldn't love him anymore. I fell in love with a different Shane, not the one that he became in our relationship." Kim had said too much, she always said too much around Nathan.

"So if he became the person he used to be, would you love him again?" This time, Kim turned to look at Nathan's face completely. She couldn't understand what his fixation was with her and Shane's relationship.

"No. I don't forgive easily Nathan. So just remember that before you go pulling s**t on me while we're on this trip. I am the most unforgiving person you will ever meet."

Nathan felt like he should be convinced, but he wasn't. It shouldn't matter to him whether Kim was still in love with Shane or not, but for some reason it did and it felt strange.

"I've gathered that already." He replied.

"How old were you when you lost your virginity?" Nathan scoffed at her question. "You never said twenty questions had to be serious..." she added.

"Fifteen."

"How-"

"No Nathan, it's still my turn. You asked three in a row now shut up and let me speak." She ordered him, causing his lips to turn upward in a wide smile.

"You're crazy." He muttered lowly to himself.

"What do you do when you're not working?"

"I work some more." Kim had to roll her eyes at his statement.

"That's so boring. I hate a man that's too dedicated to his job."

"It's a good thing we're not together then isn't it?"

"I'm too good for you, that's why we're not together." She said light-heartedly. "And because you're on a mission to bring me to D.C and never have to see me again after that."

"I'm clearly the one that would be too good for you." He laughed at her statement.

"Whatever. I'm cold, can you turn down the AC?"

"No, I'm warm. Here," he reached in with one hand to the back seat and threw her a blanket. "Take this."

"Oh, how nice? Do you keep your blankets in the back seat next to your spare guns and cable ties?" Nathan couldn't help but chortle loudly at Kim's sarcasm.

"Yes I do, that's your fifth question ruined. Now it's my turn to ask."

"No, that's not fair!"

"It is. Now, when was the last time you've ever been with a man before this trip?" Nathan was curious, and thought it may take her a long time to think about the answer but instead, she answered almost straight away.

"A couple of days before I bumped into you. And what about you?"

"I've never been with a man Kim, another question ruined." He laughed.

"You're so unfair."

"If you could take back what you did to your father and running away, would you do it?" It took Kim a long time to answer this one.

"I'm not sure anymore..." she mumbled but Nathan could still hear what she had said. Her lack of confidence when answering made him frown. "Nathan?"

"Yes?"

"I want to ask you a question, but you don't have to answer it if you don't want to." She warned him.

"Go on."

"What happened to your parents?" Nathan didn't speak a word for a minute or two, all he did was let out a few long breaths before gulping.

"They were both shot off duty one day when they were on the way to pick me up from football practice. They were murdered and I want to get revenge."

"I'm sure you will. You seem like a determined person." His icy tone scared her a little but she didn't tell him that. He nodded at her in reply and then asked another question.

"What did your friends back in Chicago do to you? Why aren't they your friends anymore?"

"I told you already." She said as she wrapped the blanket around herself and got comfortable.

"I know there's more to the story. Tell me the truth."

"I found out that they were keeping a lot of secrets from me. Not just your typical white lies, things that were a lot more serious than that."

"You're turn."

"I'm getting kind of tired." She said before yawning as if on que. "We can continue this later. You've had eight questions, I've had seven."

"But it was beginning to get interesting?"

"It really wasn't..." she laughed a little. "Wake me up when we get there." Kim turned then and rested her head on the window before closing her eyes and drifting off to sleep.