Born of the Moon

Chapter 5: Rejection

MALYKA:

It has been days since I’ve had a decent night’s rest and it is starting to get to me. I rub the skin of my face harshly, looking into the mirror and gazing into my own eyes. They are red with exhaustion and I feel like I can just lean over the sink and just fall asleep right here.

My wolf hasn’t allowed me a moment of rest since I bit our mate. She replays that night over and over again in my mind until I become sick with annoyance. When it finally becomes repetitive enough I manage to drift off to sleep, but that’s when she really has her fun. Giving me images of my mate touching me in ways that makes my insides burn with desire. I always wake up after a few minutes, h**ny as s**t. The sheets soaked in my sweat and pleasure alike.

The more I dream of our mate, the more my wolf reminds me of those dreams when I’m awake. I’ve felt like a bag of nerves walking around, my desire driving me up the walls. There is only one thing I can do. I have to reject her, I have to reject the mating bond.

“Don’t you dare.” My wolf’s voice appears in my mind. She’s angry with me, it feels like she’s always angry with me about something.

“She threatens our place as Alpha. If you will not let me fight her because of the mating bond, then I have no choice but to reject the bond and hit her when she is weakest.” I try to reason with my wolf. She knows what’s at stake, but she is a lovesick fool who thinks that our destiny is somehow intertwined with that pathetic wolf that now holds the power of the Alpha that has always been meant for me. 

Well, she can’t have it. I am the rightful Alpha of this pack and I will take back the power no matter what it costs me. I’ve been weak before, allowing her to live, but I will not make the same mistake twice.

“You don’t mean that, Malyka. The Goddess does not give second chances.” My wolf’s pleading tone appears in my head.

“Good, I don’t want another mate, because I am no one’s f**k*ng mate.” I growl back at her and I can feel her retreating into me. I’m so sick and tired of her yapping on and on about our stupid mate.

I open the cold tap and shove my face under the stream of icy water, rubbing it into my eyes, trying to wake myself up. It's time, I can’t take this anymore. I have to get a message to my mate without anyone else noticing and ask her to meet me alone in the woods so that I can reject her and take back my Alpha power when she's weakest. Ending this whole nightmare once and for all.

A memory pops into my head, a faint caress at the back of my mind. My mate’s hands on me, all over me… Inside me. I grip the basin so hard my knuckles turn white as a fresh wave of desire pulses through me. “Get out of my head!” I yell at the mirror, feeling the eyes of my wolf gazing back at me.

I have to put an end to this torment before I lose my mind. It is 3AM in the morning, dusk is still far away and I know any sleep I might get will still be plagued by these images, these… Feelings. 

Without giving it a second thought I march outside and rip off my clothes as I easily slip into my wolf form. By now it only takes me seconds to do it. I've done it so many times that I know the difference between life and death can sometimes be whether you control your wolf, or it controls you. I make sure to always be the one in control, but of course that is impossible to do when I’m asleep. She’s always used that little weakness to toy with me.

I dart through the woods in my wolf form, racing to the border of the other pack’s territory. I need to get close enough to their pack house so that I can climb into the Alpha’s mind and tell her to meet me. It isn’t going to be easy with the patrols now passing by every ten minutes. They've doubled the watch on their border after our last encounter, rightfully so.

I know I’ll be able to sneak past, but the trick is to do so undetected. If they pick up my scent when they pass over it they will know I’m inside and they might come after me. With no pack to protect me as I trespass on their lands, they would probably kill me without even consulting their Alpha. If they can catch me first, that is.

I may not be the strongest wolf in the world, but I am certainly the slyest. Although, my mate did kill my previous Alpha by shoving him off of a cliff, and there is no slyer move than that. I dread what I’ll have to do next. The best way to hide my scent is to cover myself in something with a stronger odor. The only things that work for that purpose is fresh warm s**t or a week old c*rc*ss. Both have a putrid smell that attacks the senses so thoroughly everything else becomes undetectable.

I reluctantly hold my snout into the wind and take a deep inhale of breath, allowing all the smells I can detect to overwhelm my keen wolf senses until I find the one I need. Fresh warm s**t it is. I run until I find the source and have to keep myself from gagging as I roll onto my back into the warm gooey substance. It is such a shame to ruin my beautiful white fur like this, but thankfully, if I clean myself as a human, I’ll be clean again as a wolf.

The scent lingers though, and I have no idea how I am going to explain this to my pack. Finally, satisfied that no inch of my body is unmarred by s**t, I shake off the excess and start towards the border of the other pack. I cross it without any real difficulty, no patrols nearby, and try to find my way towards their pack house.

Normally, I would just use my nose to help me find it, but considering that I smell like sewage it is basically impossible to smell anything other than myself. I tense, ducking behind a bush as I hear a howl break into the sky. The patrols must be signalling something to each other, did they catch onto my trail?

I stay in my hiding spot for a few moments until I hear another howl coming from much closer to me. Could the second howl have been from their pack house? I follow my gut and make my way towards it despite what will happen to me if I get caught. My bravery pays off as I find the clearing where their pack house stands proudly. 

This should be close enough for me to contact her without being detected. I focus my mind on her, reaching out to her mentally. My wolf does a happy leap inside of me as I feel our minds connecting. The warmth from my mate pours into me and I’m caught off guard by the stream of emotions she shoves at me. She must be asleep, it’s the only time a wolf’s true feelings can be discovered by someone willing to creep into their thoughts.

“Wake up.” I whisper though the connection, hoping I’m close enough for it to work. I feel the bond shiver as her mind tries to respond to me. “Wake up.” I say again, a little louder now. Though I can feel her dreams turning to nightmares because of my presence in her mind, I push on. “Wake up!” I yell into her mind, desperate to get out of this place.

I feel her mind springing to life as she jolts awake and I take my opening. “Calm down, it’s me.” Trying to muster something as close to a soothing tone as I can manage. It would be easier to lure her out if she trusts me. I feel the link between us smooth over as she calms again.

“Hello, Dearest.” I fall back onto my a*s as an unknown voice bellow into my head, much louder than it should be. Somehow, I’m aware that this is not her I am hearing. “Who are you?” I demand of the strange voice, sending as much power down the link as I can to copy the same loudness it had achieved. Who else could I be linking to? I shouldn’t be able to hear anyone else in this pack.

“Don’t recognize me? I’m your mate… Well, I’m the primal part of her.” The voice comes again, sultry, low and incredibly dangerous. So, this is her wolf I’m addressing, much like my own, her wolf must be dominant when she’s asleep. 

"Let me speak to her.” Croaks my own desperate wolf as we both realize what’s happening.

“No way in h*ll.” I spit back at my wolf. Hoping that the other wolf hasn’t heard her plea, it is incredibly difficult to control what is hidden and what is seen when someone is linked to your mind. 

“Wake her up, I need to speak to her.” I command the wolf, but my request is answered with a low growl. “Why don’t you come in here and do it yourself, Coward.” She says in response.

I bear my teeth at her, even though I know she can’t see me. “How dare you!” I yell back at her. This wolf is something else entirely, how does she keep control of it? It feels stronger than anything I’ve dealt with before.

“How dare I?” Her wolf lets out a low chuckle at that. “How dare you!” She sends a ripple through the link to accompany her words and I can physically feel them ringing in my ears. I whimper unwillingly at the sensation. “Coming back here after you almost killed us!”  The wolf’s words are like a wave, crashing through my body, sending goosebumps across the surface of my skin. “You really think we want a mate with so little spine? You really think we’d forgive you after what you did!” She yells and I shrink back at her words. 

Then it hits me, why the wolf doesn’t want to wake her up. She would forgive me, wouldn't she? The warmth I had felt earlier had been from her, because unlike her wolf she is warm, kind and merciful. 

“You know she will forgive me, that's why you're scared. You're afraid I'll kill her. That I'll kill you.” I whisper back down the link, waiting for the words to have the desired effect, and it does. The wolf shrinks back ever so slightly, enough for me to regain control of myself and give the message I'm here to give.

“Tell her to meet me tomorrow night at the border where we fought, at midnight, I will be waiting.” I quickly sever the link before the wolf can crawl back into my mind. I don't want that thing anywhere near me. I can’t believe my mate is the vessel for that monstrosity. Whether it tells her or not, I don’t care anymore, but I have a feeling it will… Because with that kind of unchecked raw power comes an unquenchable desire to fight, and more importantly, to win.

I’ve seen it in my previous Alpha. His wolf was always a mean thing that kept pushing him for more, more fights, bigger fights, but also bigger victories, bigger territories. A wolf like that needs to be put under lock and key, because once let out it is a force that will only be stopped in death. Death of their host.

I run back the way I came, grateful when I am out of reach of my mate and her bloodthirsty wolf. Despite my own relief, I can feel my wolf whimpering inside me, wanting to go back to her mate and I despise the tinge of longing she sends through me, through us.