Jane Doe - Dead or Alive

Chapter 4 – Jane Doe

Jane’s POV

I was begging on Canal pass, it was notorious for commuter’s and although most of them walked straight passed, every now and again someone would stop, and the pay-out was almost always worth the hours of being ignored.

I didn’t blame the people that walked straight passed, they had no idea who I was or why I was there. Sometimes I imagined someone kind coming along to help me sort out my life.

When I left Jase’s house that night, I never imagined I would end up being homeless and begging to survive each day. I wanted more from my life; I just had no idea how to go about changing the situation I had found myself in.

It had been a slow morning but as I stood up to leave, a young girl, no older than about 13 came over to me. She was wearing a smart school uniform and blazer; her new school shoes were shiny and clean.

Her sleek dark hair shone in the mid-day autumn sun and her skin was blemish free. She looked clean, healthy, and well looked after. She looked like she came from a loving home, she was well taken care of. I envied her.

‘Hi’ she smiled.

‘Hi, are you lost?’ She was out of place here.

‘Oh, no I’m not lost’

‘You shouldn’t be here on your own, it’s not all that safe for a young girl like you. Can I walk you somewhere?’

‘If it isn’t safe, why are you here?’

I smiled warmly, she wasn’t soft ‘Ah, well, if I had a nice warm home to go to, and a family who loved me, I would be there. As it is, I don’t have any of those things. So, I am stuck here, trying to get enough money for my next meal. For now, anyway. I am hoping, it won’t be forever’

‘That’s sad’

‘Yes, it is. But we mustn’t dwell on the things we can’t change. Just try and do our best to make things better for the future’

‘You sound smart. Couldn’t you get a job?’

‘I couldn’t finish school. And I don’t have a home. It is difficult to get a job without a home, and it is more difficult to get a home without a job’

She looked a little confused.

‘Without a home, I don’t have an address. Without an address, I can’t get a job’

‘Oh, that sucks’

‘Yeah, doesn’t it!’ I laughed.

I looked at my watch, I always met Blue and Bobby at one to check in. I didn’t really want to be late and worry them.

‘Do you need to be somewhere?’

‘No, I have no where to go’ I lied, I got the impression she needed me right now.

‘What’s your name?’

‘Jane. What’s yours?’

‘Libby’

‘Nice name. What brings you here on a school day Libby?’

‘I skipped school’

‘Oh, why’s that then?’

‘I had a row with my parents. I was failing in my lessons’

‘You aren’t going to get any better if you don’t attend at all’

‘That’s the problem. I hate the school. It’s horrible. I get bullied. I can’t concentrate and the bitches rip any work I do into pieces. I am always in trouble because of it and well, I figured, what’s the point’

‘Ah, well, that sucks too’

‘Not as much as being homeless, jobless, and unable to be educated. I guess I should go back to school’

‘Libby’

‘Yeah’

‘If they love you, your parents, they will understand. Just tell them the truth. Maybe you could move schools. Don’t give up’

‘Thanks Jane’ she smiled as she dug into her pocket and put the money she had in my pot.

‘Libby, no, I couldn’t take it’

‘You need it more than me. I’m good. Thanks, again’

She walked away down the path, and I made my back to the factory. Libby had almost doubled my daily income with the £4 she put in my tin. I was eternally grateful.

I made my way to the squat Blue, Bobby and I shared. They hadn’t fared much better, but at least we could get a hot drink and something to eat. This life was beginning to become a hard slog. I wondered how they had done it for so long.

The following day I made my way back to Canal pass. I sat in my spot and waited for the commutators to ignore me for the rest of the day.

A man in his late 40’s approached. He was wearing an expensive suit, he looked well-manicured and was clean shaven. His dark hair styled to perfection and his briefcase looked like it cost a small fortune.

To my surprise, he stopped and looked at me.

‘Can I help you?’

‘Jane?’

Fear shot through me; how did he know my name? My family had never once looked for me, that I was aware of, but that didn’t mean I was safe. I was pretty sure I didn’t know this man, but it didn’t mean he hadn’t been sent by them.

I stood up and backed away. He edged forwards and put his hand out as if to grab me. I slipped, fell back and landed straight into the Canal. s**t. I couldn’t swim. As I panicked, I inhaled the murky liquid surrounding me. I was unable to keep my head above the freezing cold water.

I sank, and as I drifted under, images of my sorry state of a life flashed in my mind. I never remembered being really happy. Maybe it was better this way. That was the last thought I had before everything went black, and the darkness enveloped me.

Finally, I was free.

Only, I wasn’t dead.

I was barely alive.

But I wasn’t dead.

I woke in a hospital room, clean white crisp sheets surrounded me. I was in a bed. It was soft and I didn’t want to move. I had never slept in a bed before. It felt like I was in heaven. Everything smelt clean and even the annoying noises of the beeping machines couldn’t keep me from smiling.

‘Jane, your awake, thank god!’

I knew that voice. The man. He was here. No longer in his suit but in joggers and a sweatshirt. He looked different, but it was definitely him.  I was too tired to run.

‘Please, don’t take me back to them, they’ll kill me’

‘Who will kill you, Jane?’

‘My mother, my brothers, that’s why you are here?’ I don’t know why I assumed that, but why else would a man like him be looking for a girl like me?

‘Why would they kill you?’ he sounded concerned.

‘Doesn’t matter. Has Bobby or Blue been in?’ my friends would worry when I didn’t show at the squat, If one of us didn’t show, it was never good.

‘Who are they? Your Pimps?’

‘What?’ what an ass hat.

‘Sorry, Sorry, I just assumed…’

‘What that because I’m homeless I sell my body. Nice. Please leave’

‘s**t, Jane, I’m sorry. I was an i***t. No one has been here since you arrived, and I don’t know your mother or brothers’ he looked at me with sympathy and quietly asked ‘What the hell happened to you?’

‘Why do you care?’

‘I came to thank you. You spoke to my Libby yesterday. We thought she had gone of the rails. But she came and spoke to us after she had seen you. She told us everything. We have applied to change her schools. I wanted to thank you in person, she said you had a tough life. I’m not going to lie Jane, I thought she was being naive. But I can see now, you really have had a tough run. I want to help’

‘Libby! She is a good, kind girl. I’m glad she spoke to you; I am happy she is getting the love and support a young girl should have. But you can’t help me, Mr….’

‘Mr. Hargreaves, you can call me James’

‘As in James Hargreaves from Tech and Co’

‘You know me?’

‘Everyone knows you!’ I sat and gawked at him for a moment ‘Thank you, for saving my life. I should have said it sooner, it was rude of me not to thank you’

‘I wasn’t the one who pulled you out’ he looked a little embarrassed ‘I can’t swim either’

‘Oh. Then why are you here? And dressed like that’

‘If I walked in here in a suit, I would be recognised. I didn’t want to be seen fraternising with…’ He stopped before he finished his sentence.

So, I finished it for him ‘A homeless w***e’ I raised my eyebrows, and he pursed his lips.

‘Well… yes. Again, sorry about that’

‘It doesn’t matter. I guess it’s what everyone thinks. Anyway, whether you saved me or not, I am at least grateful I have a bed for the night’

‘Jane, please let me help you’

‘I honestly don’t think you can’

‘I can give you money to start again’

‘I wouldn’t even know where to begin James. I have never had anything’

The nurse came in and checked me over.

‘You were very lucky young lady. Your dad here hasn’t left your side since you came in’ she smiled at him, no doubt eyeing him up, for an older man he was very good looking ‘Paul, why don’t you get a coffee while I see to Jane’

I looked at him as if he was crazy and he came over to the side of the bed, I flinched as he neared me.  He whispered ‘I’m sorry Jane. For now, I’m Paul Smith – You are Jane smith, it’s easier this way’

He pretended to kiss me on the cheek, ‘I’ll be back shortly sweetheart’ he said loud enough for the nurse to hear, and then he left the room.

An hour had passed and James or Paul or what ever his name was hadn’t returned. Nor did I now expect him too. I wasn’t surprised. I was beyond help. Sooner I realised this, the better.

‘You may be ready to leave by tomorrow’ she smiled ‘All your vitals are looking good. we just need to monitor you for a little longer and then you can go home’

‘Home’ I said aloud, yeah, great, thanks ‘Brilliant’ I sighed. At least I get more time in this comfy bed.

There was a knock at the door, and I saw the familiar blue hair as Blue walked into the room.

‘Jane’ she smiled.

‘Hi’ I smiled warmly as my friend entered the room.

‘How are you?’

‘Ok’

‘She’s doing much better. Hopefully home tomorrow. Are you, her sister?’

‘Yeah, Hi, I’m Mary, thanks for looking after her. I was so worried’

‘I’ll leave you girls too it’

‘Mary?’ I laughed.

‘It is actually my name’

‘f**k off’

‘It is! And Jane is yours?’

‘Yes actually’ I didn’t know if she was being truthful or not, I only every knew her as Blue.

‘Really! You used your real name’

‘I wasn’t as smart as I thought I was back then’

We laughed forgetting who we were for a minute. We didn’t often laugh.

‘How did you know I was here?’

‘You didn’t come back, Bobby and I have checked all the hospitals, this was out last hope’

‘Yes, but…’

‘Frank said you were dead, saw you dragged out the canal’

Frank was an older homeless guy, everyone knew him. He usually frequented the Canal pass, but mainly to sleep off heavy drinking from the night before on a bench further down the walkway.

‘Then how did you find me; they don’t have my proper name’

‘I asked at reception if a ‘Jane’ had been bought in following a possible drowning. She said no unidentifiable females had been bought in deceased, but Jane Smith had been admitted follow a dip in the canal’

‘Oh, ok. They said I can leave tomorrow’

‘With your Dad?’

‘Who?’

‘They said you were here with your Dad?’

I laughed a little, ‘Oh! Right, yeah, He’s not my dad… long story! He thinks he can help me’

‘Can he?’

‘Dunno’

‘Do you trust him?’

‘I trust no one’

‘True, but if he can help you Jane, you have to let him. You always deserved more than this life’

‘What about you and Bobby?’

‘Don’t ever look back Kiddo, we will be alright! And if it doesn’t work out, you know where to find us, we’ll always be here for you Jane’ she said as she hugged me.

Then she left the room.