The Secrets We Keep

Chapter 20

Erika

I blinked my eyes and looked around. I was at the abandoned pack house, I'd visited once before. I went up to the bedrooms and as I made my way up the empty building started to change. I went to the room I knew my mother was killed in and I felt everything. The burns, the pain, the wounds that weren't healing, everything from the battle that i just took part in. I laid down and just let myself feel it all without a fight. I closed my eyes and I heard a voice. I ignored it at first because I was sure it was Artemis, but then I heard it again.

"Amarie," I opened my eyes and saw someone standing over me, "get up sweetheart, this isn't how it ends." I sat up quickly and got ready for a fight. She looked at me and chuckled, "Oh, Amarie, calm down."

"How do you know me?" I wasn't sure of anything right now, all I could think was how crazy I am. She knelt down so she could be face to face with me and gently ran her hand down the front of my face. It was so familiar, but I didn't know why.

"You have Michael's eyes." She smiled at me and I felt myself relax. "I'm the one that gave you the name you have. Well, your real name at least." She smiled happily, and stood up, extending her hand down to me. I looked at it then back up at her. I took her hand and she helped me up, "so do you have an idea who I am?"

I had a feeling as to who she was, but I didn't want to say it, because it felt like a betrayal to Leanna, so I looked down, but she quickly lifted my chin up.

"I don't blame you for not saying it. Now what questions do you have for me?" I looked out the window and saw the sun breaking the skyline behind the forest and thought about asking her about her death, and what it felt like. That wasn't something I wished to know though. I avenged her and that's what mattered. Then the one thought that mattered came into my mind, and hot tears burned my cheeks from all the cuts I had.

"Is this heaven?"

"No, not exactly. I guess you could say it's an in between."

I kept my composure and began my real question. "I... umm," I had to pause for a minute to hold back my sobs, "is Elijah... did he make it to..."

She smiled at me and let out a small giggle. "Oh, Elijah, no words will ever be able to describe how much love I felt when he was born."

I was confused by her words, so I asked her my question again. "Is he in heaven?"

"Sweet sweet girl, that pup is just about as stubborn and overly dramatic as you." She let out a warm laugh as she touched items on the dresser that seemed to appear as she reached for them. "He never let anyone, not even Naya touch him unless it was you, Anthony, or his nanny." I turned to face her and tears suddenly paused, he was alive.

"Where is he?" I didn't mean to yell at her, it accidentally came out like that.

"Have they told you how I got you pups out 14 years ago?" I scoffed at her. I had no idea how we escaped. I was four! I heard her chuckle as she walked over to the tall dresser against the wall. She touched the dresser as if she was taking in a joyful memory, and then she did something that took me completely by surprise. She nudged it a little and it slid open completely and revealed an escape. I looked at what I just saw in shock. When I came here with my brothers and sister I would never have guessed this was here. I looked at her and wondered what made her think Silver Moon had something like that and if they did, Naya would have had to know about it.

"I thought Michael was crazy for doing this, but it turns out he was more right than I ever wanted him to be. I've visited Anthony my beauty, this day was bound to come, and he needed to make sure my grandson was safe from everyone, especially his parents." I cringed at her words. He knew his parents would try to hurt Elijah and he didn't do anything to stop them.

"Amarie, he did more for that pup and you than you will ever know. Your favorite perfume? A masking potion that keeps your scent hidden. When you gave birth to Elijah, he took you into hiding so no one knew who you were. He fell in love with you, even though he knew you weren't going to be his mate and he did it all anyway." My heart started to heal a little, but then I thought about Anthony, and the possibility of him not pulling through.

"Sweetheart, he knew who and what you were before you did and he did everything in his power to keep you safe. He convinced Dante to bring you back to this world, even though it meant losing you. He gave you a chance to be out of Rolland's grasp before you shifted in Silver's territory." I looked back at this person claiming to be my mother, and I realized I needed to get back. I started to leave and glanced back one last time but she was gone. I held my hand over my chest and this was the first time I actually felt blessed by something. Now I had to get back before I ran out of time.

Mathias

After Erika bolted from the pack house, I turned to my sister and, with a loud growl, I grabbed her by the throat and held her against the wall.

"The next time you lay a hand on my mate will be that last time you breathe life! Do you understand me?" I heard a mix of growls belonging to my pack and Anthony's.

"Remember Brother, you may be Alpha of White Moon soon, but I am Luna of this pack, and you are in my territory." I looked over my shoulder and saw the siblings at my side, but Silver Moon wasn't backing down with their Luna's life literally in the hands of a rival pack's Alpha.

"Maybe for now, but if he dies without you giving him an heir, you're just going to be a mateless she wolf who was a temporary Luna figure. One who let the former Luna take the life of their future Alpha. We'll see how far this protection goes once your tie to them is gone." Once I finished saying what I had to say to her, I released her from my grip and she fell to the floor gasping, trying to catch more than a small breath of air. Once everything was said and done, Anthony's beta, Nick, walked up to me but never once looked me in my face. He fell down to his knees in front of me and bowed his head. I could hear his short stutter breathing from crying.

"Alpha, I wanted....." before he went on, I held my hand up at him to stop him while he was ahead.

"Nick, I am not Alpha yet. White Moon doesn't belong to me, but I appreciate the respect you were giving."

"Okay, Mathias, umm I wanted to apologize for everything that happened to Erika," he covered his mouth to hide his sobs and to calm himself, "and to the baby. I didn't know Naya would do anything to him. I never meant for any of it to happen." I looked at him and nodded at him, accepting his apology. He looked at me, then Danny bowed and then took his leave. I considered going to find Erika, but then I changed my mind since the immediate threat had been eliminated. I figured she was going to need some space since the pup didn't make it. I buried my face in my hands, and took a deep breath in hopes of relaxing. I leaned back and rested my eyes and must have dozed off because I heard a sudden commotion. When I opened my eyes to see what the fuss was about, I saw a flash of white speed up stairs and I didn't hesitate to follow it. I got to the top floor that usually belonged to the Alpha and his family. I looked into each room and when I came to a door that had a large E on it, I heard sniffing. I looked in and saw a large wolf with red on her.

"Erika? What are you doing?" She shifted back to her human form and seemed to be in a panic, looking around the room that was originally painted blue and brown for the pup that slept in it. She ignored me for a second, and I was hurt by her silence, then she finally allowed her voice to form words.

"I need to find something hidden in here."

"For what baby?" I asked, hoping she didn't really think there was something to find.

"For Elijah, Mathias! What else?" I sighed and looked at the floor that was covered in blood. I took a deep breath and focused for a second, and then I heard something. A couple of heartbeats. They were weak though, clinging to life, but just barely. I took off my shirt and walked over to my mate so she could cover up. I looked around, trying to make out where it was, but it was too quiet to be in that room. I walked out the door as my mate ripped through the room her pup once slept in. I made my way down the hall listening for the sound I had hoped belonged to the pup that was half the person I loved most in the world and half the person I wanted to rip apart for all the trouble he caused her.

I entered a room that had a mixed scent of my sister and Anthony. I listened to every wall in this room to find out where the sounds came from, and eventually I made my way to the closet. I looked inside and saw clothes that belonged to Danny, Anthony and Elijah. There was a changing table in the back of the closet. I tried to push the table from the wall but it didn't budge until I stepped back. I heard a click and the table glided to the side. I took a deep breath waiting to see what or who was inside.

I saw a she wolf a little older than us lying on the floor with her back facing my direction. I took a step closer and touched her to see if she'd respond but she didn't. I rolled her on her back and realized there was something she was cuddling. I lifted her arm and I saw a little version of Erika and Zeric. I stood there shocked at the sight, then the crashing wave of relief.

"Erika!" I yelled to her, but wasted no time scooping up the girl holding the pup and running down to James. Erika was right behind me. As soon as we got to the office he was in, I pushed through the doors, not caring about what he could have been doing.

"James, she isn't responding and neither is the pup, you need to save him now please." I've never said please to my uncle but I looked at this small boy and felt nothing but worry.

"Okay, Mathias, I will see what I can do, okay?"

"NO!" I slammed my hand on the table, furious that, that was his response. "That's not good enough! You save him James!"

I felt a hand grab my arm and sparks calmed me instantly. I turned and saw her bright green eyes pleading for me to comfort her. I sighed and nodded at her, pulling her close to me, allowing the mate bond to do its job and fix whatever hurt, pain and fear we were experiencing. I wrapped her in my arms, lifting her and carried her out of the office, back up to the top floor to find her something to wear instead of just the t-shirt she had on. We walked into the alpha room and I sat her on the bed. His scent was all over this place and I still couldn't stand it but I got over it. I entered the closet and saw my sister's clothing on one side and shuffled through all of it till I found something that was more of Erika's taste.

I walked out and handed her the clothes I snagged for her. I went to the bathroom to wash off a little. As I was washing my face, I felt sparks from where her hand suddenly touched my back and slowly traveled around as she pulled me into a hug. I wiped my face and turned to face her. I looked down at her face, which was thinner than it should have been, and not healing like a wolf should. I gently touched her face, hurt that I had failed to protect her. It wasn't even me that saved her, it was him. I didn't want to admit it but he did what I could not do, he kept her alive. Nick got her out and I, well, I walked us onto a battlefield.

"I'm sorry I didn't get here sooner," I leaned down and met her with a kiss, and she reciprocated. The longer we held our kiss, the stronger the sparks started to feel and I could tell she felt it too. I pulled away from her and held my breath. I felt my heart getting heavy from what I was considering. I held her face to keep her gaze. I could feel my eyes fill with water as I let her face go and took a step back. When I looked back at her, I could see the confusion on her face, and the hurt she was feeling was apparent.

"So umm....I uh," I finally started to tell her what I was thinking, hoping she was going to understand. "I don't think I'm what's best for you," my voice started to c***k as I tried to finish what was on my mind. "I think it's best for you if we sever our mate bond."

"No." She had tears in her eyes but she wasn't mad, "you don't get to do that. You don't get to decide what's best for me." I crossed my arms trying to calm the sobs trying to escape as I took another step back from her. "You said I was made for you, and that you were made for me. I don't care what you think, I need you, and you are mine." She reached her hand out and touched my arm. I pulled my arm before she could touch me and I hoped she was right.

"I'm sorry I failed you." I had to make sure she realized what little I had actually done to help her. I didn't stop her from being taken by Naya. I couldn't help her during her first shift and I almost died because I thought..... I don't even know what I was thinking when that happened honestly. I knew there was something about her that was more than human, but I didn't make a better effort to figure it out until it was too late. I felt like s**t, but it didn't matter to her. She still loved me and she still wanted to be mine. I didn't deserve her and she deserved more than me or anything I could give her.

"You didn't fail. You came for me, you helped save me, and you," she wiped the tear that managed to escape, "YOU just helped me find and saved my son, and that is the most important part. Nothing else matters." I felt her hand pull my face to hers and again we ended up in a kiss that seemed more meaningful than before. She let go of my face and grabbed my hands, placing them on her hips, then she intertwined hers in the back of my neck.

"I love you Mathias." Her words were nothing more than a whisper, but I heard them perfectly. I paused for no more than a second, then I lifted her up to wrap her legs around me, allowing me to carry her to the bed. She deepened the kiss and I followed her lead. I laid her down and I allowed my hands to explore her body, which I had been missing since she left my sight.

I gently massaged each breast and felt her n*****s harden from my touch. She moaned and I felt my c**k stiffen instantly, my hand traveled down to her core. I felt her warm juices leaking from her center, letting me know she was ready and needed this just as much as I did. My hand was soaked, making it easy for my fingers to slip inside of her, she broke our kiss as she gasped from my fingers entering her as quickly as they did. As I was pumping two of my fingers inside of her, hard and fast I started to massage her clit with my thumb, causing her to buck her hips and slightly shake from the pleasure.

I moved from kissing her lips down to her beautifully erect n*****s and gently gave them each some much needed attention, as I continued my hand assult, on her soaking wet opening. I could feel her walls start to contract as she grew closer and closer to her o****m when I suddenly felt her soft hand grasp my fully erect shaft.

"Oh my goddess baby," my voice quivered as I felt her start to stroke me while still inside of the shorts I hand on. I was going to town on her enjoying all of the beautiful sounds escaping from her mouth, getting her closer to her c****x, when she pulled herself off of my hand. I looked at her wondering what happened, but pushed me over so I was on my back.

She pulled my shorts off and my erection sprang free and she grabbed it and shoved me into her mouth causing me to thrust and hit the back of her throat. I pulled her thigh over me so she was straddling my face. I couldn't silence my moans as she continued to suck me off. I felt her tongue flicking the tip any chance she got, I reached my hand around her thigh and felt her soaking wet panties and ripped them off to gain better access to her p***y.

I managed to finger her a few more times, then parted her folds and pulled her down so I could taste her. I flicked her clit with my tongue and then buried my tongue into her slit, happily taking in every drip of her minor orgasms that leaked out of her. I wrapped my arms around her waist and held her in place trying my hardest to make her c*m in my mouth. I was so close to getting her there and then she begged me to be inside of her. Which I was more than happy to oblige, she continued straddling me with her back to me and moved down then placed me at her entrance. I felt the tip of my d**k touching her and before she had a chance to slide herself down I grabbed her hips and slammed into her, forcing myself deep into her core.

"Baby.... yes baby!.... I- I- oh my god, yes please don't stop!" She didn't have to ask me twice, she arched her back and placed her hands back on my chest as I was thrusting deep and hard into her. I sat up and wrapped an arm around her and pulled her down so her tight p***y fit my entire membrane all the way down to the base. I felt her walls start to tighten again and her moans of pleasure started to turn into screams of ecstasy, "oh my... baby make me cum.... please make me c*m!" I flipped her over so she ended up with all fours on the bed, keeping a steady hard pace inside of her.

"Ahh.....y-es... Mathias I'm going to cum... c*m with me baby please... ahh!" I pulled myself out before she finished, I needed to hear her beg for more. I needed to hear her tell me she needed me.

"You want me inside of you baby?" I reached my hand down to her clit to get her o****m to hit faster and harder.

"Uh there! Right... there.... ma...Mathias d...don't.. don't stop." I knew she was ready to burst when I heard a voice cut through Erika's screams.

"Are you f*****g serious Mathias!?" Erika pulled herself off of me grabbing the blanket, and I pulled my shorts on. "You're seriously f*****g on my bed?" Danny was pissed at what she just walked in on, she glared at us both and growled stomping out of the room slamming the door. I looked over to my still naked mate and gave her a devilish look. She shook her head and then giggled as I jumped onto the bed pulling her under me.

I leaned to her ear and whispered, "I didn't get to make you finish," I started to kiss her on her neck and she moaned, "do you want to finish?"

"Mmhmm, please." I spread her legs and lowered myself and placed a kiss on each of her inner thighs. Her arousal scent was heaven. I smiled as I moved to her neck and grazed her mark with my lips. I planted soft kisses on her mark, then whispered to her again.

"Baby?" I opened her lips and shoved two fingers into her pulsing p***y, causing her to arch again. I started to flick my fingers inside of her, hitting her g spot that was full, and ready to explode. "Can you hear me?" I loved the bumps that would appear on her body, when I whispered in her ear and gave her small love bits on her neck.

"Mm...mmhmm....ah... yes I... I can hear you!" Just hearing her moan and scream to answer me made my hard on even harder. I felt her hands holding onto me, and her nails pulled down my back giving me more pleasure than pain, making me finger her harder. I pushed myself up and she released me from her claws. In a smooth transition, I took my fingers out of her, and I grabbed her hands. I held each of them over her head, I brought myself to my knees and was able to slam myself into her with out a problem. She gasped from me penetrating her unexpectedly fast and hard. I slowly, and sensually continued to slide in and out of her. I leaned down and figured this was the perfect time to tell her.

"I love you too, baby." As soon as she heard my words I sensed her smile. I continued the slow motion with my hips, as I looked at her beautiful face, and she brought her lips to mine. I brushed her lips with my tongue and she opened her mouth granting me access.

I kept pumping bringing us both closer to a finish, but I can't begin to explain how much I didn't want this to end. So I pulled out and decided to finger her again, kissing my way down to eat her out, and damn she tastes like heaven. I flicked her clit with my tongue and she started to scream out in pleasure again. I slid one finger in, then another, hitting her g spot. I felt her tighten around my fingers and then she gushed, squirting all over my hand while screaming out my name. She finished faster than I expected, and before I knew it, she was rocking her hips against my fingers ready for another o****m.

"...baby... baby you're going to make me c*m again....ah!" When I heard that I was done, I needed to be inside of her. I was ready and so was she. As soon as I slipped inside of her, she started to shake on my d**k making it almost impossible not to c*m. I felt her fill up again and she arched her back and began to grind on me, bringing her closer to another c****x. I felt myself ready to release c*m into her, I was grunting as I fought not to c*m just yet, but I started to c*m and moan anyway, "yes baby don't stop I'm cumming! Oh my goddess you're so tight!"

I felt her walls pulse on my d**k as she began to c*m "Uh I'm cumming again ah... Mathias," she threw her head back exposing her neck and I brought us closer so I could sink into her mark, as I finished loading her with my seed. I heard her lose her breath again, and she wrapped her arms and legs around me.

"Yes baby c*m all over me again." I felt the pressure build inside as her walls tightened around me. I was already done so I pulled out of her, and immediately stuck my fingers in her and played with her clit causing her to gush all over my hand again. Once she finished, I put my two fingers in my mouth enjoying her flavor one more time, as her body shake from how many times she climaxed. I gently slid my fingers back inside of her and she gripped the bed.

"Mathias, st.... Mathias, you have to stop." she was still trying to catch her breath as she spoke. I smiled as I was still softly fingering her.

"But I don't want to stop. I want to go again. I want you vibrating from how much I make you cum." I buried my face back into her neck and breathed her scent in.

"Do you... mmm..." she was still sensitive and I could feel her tighten on my fingers, "..really wanna.. ah.. mm ... kee... keep... going.. hh...hhere... ah Mathias! ah." she was still having an o****m as she was trying to speak, so I decided to slip a third finger in to see if I could help her get through it. As I was trying to get my mate to another point of ecstasy, I looked around and remembered this was Anthony's and Danny's room. I felt her hand grab mine and try to pull it out of her.

When she did this, I stopped moving my fingers and looked at her with a smirk and leaned closer to her ear, "you want me to stop baby?" I felt her shiver then moan and I twisted my fingers once, causing her to grind on them unintentionally.

"Oh my god no!" she yelled at the pleasure that flew through her body, "mmm but we have to.....uh.... we have to....ah baby!" I smirked and attacked her mouth with mine. I rotated my three fingers in her again and her c*m was just pouring out of her. She squeezed the sheets tighter when I did, and ended our kiss.

"ah baby! why isn't it stopping? ugh!!" she arched again, but I had no answer for her, but I was loving this. It was like her body couldn't get enough of this, but I knew she was getting tired. As I kept rotating and jamming my fingers in her I grabbed her hand and placed it around my c**k. I got hard instantly from her touch. I flipped us over so she was on top of me. She moaned from the change of feeling it gave her. I grabbed her hips and guided her to start rocking them.

"Baby! ah," this time her moans sounded a little different. Before I knew it she was going at her own pace exploring her own body with her hands, and it was the most sexiest thing I've ever seen. I held onto her hips letting her lead at her own pace, and suddenly she threw her head back and reached down placing her fingers on her clit. When her eyes met mine her eyes were dark with lust, she picked up her pace and I pushed my hips up for her to take my entirety inside of her.

"Mathias! oh f**k, f**k, ah this is it, uh... uh... yes... mmmm..." I let my seed fill her up once again, and thrust a few more times in her when her whole body relaxed. She laid down on my chest catching her breath.

"Feel better?"

She nodded as I kissed her forehead, "mmhmm."

"Feel good?" She snapped her head up at me, and without hesitation she answered.

"That was the best thing I've ever felt." I looked down at her and sat up with her still on my lap and still inside of her. I gave her another kiss and slipped myself out of her.

"uh!" she covered her mouth as she yelled in pleasure from it again.

I looked at her and smiled, "come on baby let's get cleaned up and go see how its all going."