Window Dinner
1013 Words
It took me a bit of time to accept the fact that he was gone. My skin, however, thought differently.
"Aunt Meghan. I don't think I will be able to have dinner either."
I turned to my mother, whose brows were furrowed darkly, her eyes fixed on me.
"Why?" She asked Matthew without looking at him.
"How do you expect him to be able to have dinner when you intentionally did that to his brother?"
"Don't you dare talk to me, Iris. I already had the menu, and I forgot..."
"You even said you would change the menu, Aunt. I mean, I have no right to ask you not to cook what you want. But I don't think I would be able to eat here right now, I am sorry."
Matthew stood up, then walked to me. He kissed my forehead, then walked away, leaving just I and Mum on the table.
"You did that on purpose."
She raised her brow. "It is my house. They don't get to choose who can have dinner with me. That decision is mine!"
"What do you have against Nikolai? You barely even know him!"
"Everything!" She yelled, hitting the table as she stood up. I have never seen my mother so angry. "Everything about him annoys me. And those stupid lovelorn eyes you keep goving him while Matthew is sitting right across from you! How dare he touch your face like that? Did you tell him he could do that?"
"Matthew didn't have any problems with it. And he didn't even touch me like a woman. He touched me like a freaking toddler."
"It doesn't matter. You are dating Matthew and..."
"Well, guess what! You pushed even Matthew away! I hope you stuff all those nuts down and have a field day with it."
"Iris!" She yelled after me as I ran upstairs, but I didn't stop or even act like I could hear her. I closed the door and leaned on it, my eyes closing, my lips parting.
I hated how I felt right now. The combination of guilt towards Nikolai, towards Matthew, towards my own self, it all threatened to drown me.
My phone started to ring, and I pulled myself to grab it, my chest heaving.
"Hey, baby."
I swallowed, closing my eyes. "Are you okay?"
To be honest, I wanted to know about Nikolai more.
"I am good. Nikolai already went to bed, and I think I will just grab a snack. Do you want one?"
I shook my head. "Could you please apologize to him for me? My mum is never like this and..."
"Oh, I know. She was probably stressed. He doesn't even seem to care, so don't worry. Make sure to have dinner."
I swallowed, then cut the call and let the phone go on the floor. Slowly, I stood up and walked to the bathroom. It helped me cry nuch faster, and I slowly walked out, my chest heaving. I changed into a pair of shorts and a light shirt, then started to walk to my bed when I stopped.
Slowly, I retraced my steps towards the window. My heart was threatening to burst in my chest as I pulled the drapes apart, and my hands slowly came to rest on both sides.
Nikolai was sitting on the window again. He was shirtless, with his hair falling in front of his eyes, the cup of coffee in his hands.
I swallowed, then slowly leaned forward, risking my own confidence and stability.
"Nikolai?"
He turned to me, and for a second, I just felt my heart go on overdrive, a calm washing over me similar to the relief of someone who had been starved for years finally finding what he had been looking for.
He let his eyes take me in before he gave a small nod to acknowledge me.
"I am sorry about earlier," I said, my eyes taking him in. He was beautiful, and even more so with the moonlight.
He shrugged and then met my eyes. "Did you have dinner?"
It was the first time he was acknowledging me.
I shook my head slowly. "No. I... I lost appetite."
He chuckled. "Because Matthew left?"
No, because you left. But I wish to live to see the day I would be able to tell him that.
"Well, I just... lost appetite."
He nodded, then slowly got off the window. My smile faltered as he disappeared for a minute. Suddenly, he came back, and this time, he was holding something that looked like a sandwich or a burger.
It was wrapped completely, and he sat on the window again, his free hand pushing his hair back.
"Can you catch?"
I smiled, then nodded, sniffing a little. He adjusted, then threw the wrapper over. I tried to catch it, but it fell between us to the ground.
"There goes dinner," I said with a laugh as I looked over the window.
"I am deducting that from your test."
I met his eyes and swallowed. "Not fair."
He gave a snicker, then reached for another one.
"How many do you have?" I asked, a laugh escaping me. He shrugged as he threw it to me, and this time I caught it, half of my body going over the window.
I laughed and raised my trophy to him, and he gave me a smile. It showed his dimple, his eyes, the slight twinkle, and all the reasons I had thought he was beautiful as a nine year old.
"Good for you," he said, his voice deep and low.
I nodded, awed by him yet again. For a minute, I just watched him, silence settling between us, my chest heaving hard. I wish I could cover this distance.
"Good night," he said suddenly, then turned away. I watched as he closed the window, then miled the last of his essence as I saw his silhouette close the drapes, too.
I turned around and went to the floor, the food in my hand, and my other hand resting on my wildly treacherous heart.
- Writer
