1 | Unrequited
| Victoria |
“You want pizza or burgers for dinner?”
I raised my hand as I turned my head towards Preston. The sun was setting behind him, shining off his dark blonde hair.
I glanced back around the lake. We were hanging out late on a Friday afternoon- most of the kids our age lounging around or in the water.
We were in our final days of summer at the start of our junior year. I'd dragged Preston with me here, though I was starting to wish I hadn't. His disinterest was dragging my mood down.
I was wearing a brand-new bikini. It was blue and made my matching eyes pop. Mere months away from my sixteenth birthday, my curves were starting to come in, and my prettiness starting to become beauty.
All the other guys had checked me out- Preston looking everywhere but at me. Guys were coming up and chatting with me, openly flirting and not hiding their interest, and Preston had just been reading the whole time. He hadn’t even come into the water.
How long do I keep doing this?
This summer, my ‘just friends’ feelings had shifted to something more. Since the realisation of my crush, I had been trying to see if Preston liked me, or if I could get him to. It had all fallen flat so far. It seemed Preston just didn't see me any way other than a friend. We did grow up together, me as the pack's Alpha and Luna’s only child and him as the son of the pack house cook, we’d spent a lot of time together around the pack house growing up. His mum is like my second mum- the packhouse kitchen, a warm and comforting place for me.
I guess it seemed stupid to try to date him- Preston always said he wanted to wait for his mate, we both had- promising when we were kids. And my mate would be an alpha wolf and Preston's parents were omega's, so there was no way Preston would be my mate. Even all the prior Luna's of this pack found their mates outside the pack. The likelihood was high that would be the case for me.
And, he will find his own mate, shortly after I do- his birthday only a few months after mine.
There was no future beyond friendship, but part of me just wanted him for a little while. The end felt horrible in my mind though- anything we did would harshly conclude with one of us finding our fated mates.
So… why am I trying with him? I asked myself. I didn’t have an answer so I pulled myself out of my thoughts to answers his question.
“Are they on the dinner menu for tonight?” I asked, slightly bewildered. I loved junk food, but we didn't usually have that type of thing served at the packhouse. Typically, it was hearty and healthy meals- Preston's mum, Maureen, was very discerning when it came to what she fed the pack.
“Nah, I was going to make it for us.” His offer would have been sweet, but he often cooked for us- his mother's skills rubbing off on him.
“Maybe we could go out- go to that fifties diner in Elm,” I suggested- I let a little flirtiness come into my voice, leaning back, still trying to get Preston's gaze. My midriff was bare, tanned still from the time we’d spent outdoors over our summer.
“Huh?” Preston's voice conveyed his confusion.
I rolled my eyes. Disguising a flash of embarrassment- I'd sort of asked him out, and he'd just acted confused by my suggestion. True, leaving the pack grounds could be an ordeal. I wasn’t allowed to leave without a shifted pack member- but Preston never even suggested anything date-like. Ever. We always just hung around the packhouse.
“Jeez, Vee, the kid’s an omega pup, he can't take you out of the pack even if he could afford it.”
Keith, our Beta's son, dropped down beside me. I let him put his arm around me. My eyes slid to Preston as usual, seeing how he ignored Keith's insult- looking completely unphased by his presence or close proximity to me.
“You can decide which one when we get back to the pack house,” Preston said casually, shrugging.
“Whatever,” I mumbled, feeling my inside twist as Preston just went back to reading his book.
I bit my lip, shifting how I sat to turn my attention to Keith.
“Shouldn't you be at training?” I asked teasingly. Keith had just shifted, turning eighteen a few weeks earlier. He'd been disappointed I wasn't his mate. But I was okay with it- though I'd had a crush on him since I was a kid, I already knew he wasn’t someone I wanted as my mate. True, he was the hottest guy near our age- dark hair and emerald green eyes, tall and broad. He was cocksure and had swagger, which was sexy- but too much, and he just came across as obnoxious.
My feelings for Preston were different to my childhood crush on Keith- Preston was my best friend, I wanted to spend all my time with him. I wanted to hold his hand and have him want to hold mine- but he treated me like his sister. I knew Keith liked me- knew all the other guys did. I just had to bat my eyelashes, and they were tripping over their feet for me. Why didn't Preston?
“I heard you were here,” Keith mumbled, setting his lips on my bare shoulder.
I felt a flutter at his motion. He really was super hot.
I kept an eye on Preston in my peripheral vision. No reaction at all.
The disappointment I felt inside me twisted some more. I felt sour when I looked at Preston next. He continued to be oblivious of me, so I leant into Keith's body.
~*~
The sound of laughing caught my attention as I paroused the packhouse library. I had an assignment due and was sick of Preston helping me. I get it, I said in my head, your so clever- can’t get a freakin’ hint though… that made me pause. Maybe he did get the hint, and his feigning obliviousness was his hint back to me…
Deciding that was a thought I didn't want to focus on, I instead peered through the stacks and stopped short when I saw my mum, Luna Justine and Delta Lucy. They were having a cup of coffee in the bay window in the reading area of the large space. My mum loved to read so had built up the pack library to be more communal.
“Justine!” Delta Lucy hissed, “Stacy is devastated- I’ve told her to just stake her claim- but you remember how timid she could be.”
My interest was piqued- Stacy was Delta Lucy’s cousin. She had just started college- finding her mate there barely a week into her degree. I heard a lot of things around the packhouse. My sense of hearing was already phenomenal, and I hadn't got my wolf yet, so people underestimated what the Alphas and Luna's daughter may be overhearing. Suffice to say, I had heard a lot about cousin Stacy.
I wouldn't be going to college, as I'll go straight into Luna training after school. It had been fun to hear third hand what the experience was like for another daughter of an Alpha- she wasn't the heir to her pack- but her alpha mate was heir to his.
My mother stifled her laughter, “I’m sorry Luce, it’s just… I mean- an alpha mate is a double edged sword.”
She sniggered and I felt my eyebrow raise at the connotation of my mother's words. I’d never heard her speak anywhere near like this.
“Well, it would have been nice if he had been a little more… discerning with his swordplay,” Lucy said crossly. “Way Stacy puts it, every other woman she comes across has been bedded by him- and they are still throwing themselves at him.”
“Sadly, a lot of alphas are players,” my mum said, almost dismissively- like it was just to be expected.
I thought through the few alpha males I knew from other packs. They did seem to have a one track mind…
I frowned. I'd probably have the same experience as Stacy. I'd meet my alpha mate somewhere out there- and what would I get?
I thought of Preston again- I bet he'd never do anything to hurt his future mate.
~*~
I was wearing the skimpiest PJs I owned. It was a little satin camisole and very short shorts. Preston had his oversize hoodie on with track pants. This was do or die.
Preston and I hadn't hung out in weeks. He was always busy and when I wasn’t distracting myself going on dates with guys that actually wanted to look at me, I was getting slammed by homework. School was a lot tougher this year and I was adamant I do it without Prestons help. He was more distracting than helpful while my crush got in the way. I was starting to think if I could just get him out of my system, maybe I would stop thinking about him all the time.
But truly I had just missed him so much. Now though, I felt alone sitting right next to him.
And stupid. I felt so stupid to have thought I could do this. In my head, I would be all s*x kitten and seductive. But instead, we were just watching one of the stupid movies he liked, me sitting in a huff with my arms crossed. As soon as we’d settled into bed, with the TV pulled forward, he'd practically thrown the blanket over me, placing the popcorn between us. His eyes never even dropped below my chin- when he even bothered to look at me. The movie was more interesting to him.
I'd been thinking more and more about my mate. And what it would be like to meet him. What it'll be like when Preston meets his. I didn't like it- didn't like the twisting anxious feeling in my stomach. The uncomfortable feeling made me mad. I bet Preston didn't even think about these things. I bet he'd just become my mate's best friend too. He probably had a perfect omega mate out there who would be his everything. And I’ll get some kind of stuck up manwhore. It seemed unfair.
Preston threw a piece of popcorn at me. I glared at him, but he was still staring forward. “I forgot. Next Friday night- There's a movie marathon at the drive-in in Edmonton. I can borrow dad's truck- and he said he can organise a detail so you can come.” His smile pulled into a massive grin. “Vampire movies from dusk to dawn.”
He added a sinister laugh, sitting back and munching on some more popcorn.
I would normally laugh. I would normally think he was being cute and funny. But now it annoyed me. I just wanted him to look at me like the other guys did. I didn't want to do the buddy thing anymore.
“I'm busy. I have a date that night. With Keith.”
I watched Prestons face closely. He barely pulled his eyes from the television to briefly glance at me. “Oh. Right. Yeah- you like him, huh?”
“Yeah.”
“You're… not going to take a chosen, though? Right?” he asked me abruptly, concern in his voice.
“What?” The question threw me. I had thought of it. Thinking about what a mate I could land had made me think about rejection and what if my only choice was a chosen. I’d spent a number of hours daydreaming scenarios that meant that Preston could be my chosen… but I knew that wasn’t really an option for me. Fated mates ruled better.
“No,” I said sadly.
Preston looked back at me. His face softened, seeing my expression, “Hey.”
He scooted back, so he was sitting up next to me.
He swung his arm around my shoulder. “Your mate is going to be amazing, because you're amazing.”
I nodded, feeling hollow in my chest, Preston squeezing my shoulder before withdrawing his arm.
He didn’t move back to his spot, but the space between us had never felt so wide.
~*~