Have You Wonder

That Thin Line

"Dude... we need to talk."

I gather all the courage just to face him shamelessly. I can't stand hurting someone just because of lying. I mean, we all agree about this but still, I can't stand seeing him this way. If there's someone who can fully understand him on how it feels being ignored, being neglected no matter how hard you try to appeal from Enzey's attention, it's me. I was once there.

Actually... that should be me. I don't know what happened and why does he takes in everything willingly but I can stand seeing him this way. Frankly speaking, I should be happy that in a blink of an eye, our stand in Enzey's heart suddenly exchanged but my conscience take it. Especially when it has to do with fooling Enzey with lies.

He looked at me and his eyes is shouting how much he hates me right now. He probably thought I am so arrogant for acting this way on him.

"Stop acting so arrogant. I don't need your pity. Just to remind you, these... are all temporary. Once she gained her memory back, everything will be set back to its rightful place. You... Enzey... and I." He exclaimed with so much emphasis. His eyes were turning red as he hold back the fume he must be feeling within.

He probably can't take the pain anymore. But believe me, Luke, I know what you mean. And each day, I am preparing myself that in a blink of an eye, this temporary happiness I have been feeling these days with Enzey will vanish into thin air.

"I know. That's why I wanted to talk to you. About Enzey..." I mumbled.

He exhaled from so much exasperation. But our conversation has been interrupted when Enzey calls out for me.

"Kree!"

"I'm coming in a minute. Go back inside, it's cold out here." I smiled at her reassuringly and fortunately, she obediently listens to me.

"I'll be waiting at the same café we went to before," Luke stated and leave with a heavy stride going to the elevator.

I guess it's about time to wake up from this wonderful dream. Two weeks is more than enough to have more time with Enzey and finally, I've got to set her free.

I know there's a thin line between loving someone and being obsessed. And maybe I was crossing the line without noticing it because of my regrets from that seven years ago.

Maybe I was given this chance so I could do what I couldn't from that seven years ago. I shouldn't hold back from showing her how much I love her each day. And I'll make sure that this time, we will let go of each other's hand without a heavy heart. This time, we will turn our back and go on our separate ways with a light heart, no regrets...no hard feelings... just an understanding and forgiving Enzey and Kree.

Finally, the squad decided to leave, and Enzey's parents arrived. After a few minutes of chitchatting with Mr. and Mrs. Almonte, we bid our goodbyes to them.

I bid my goodbye to Enzey with a smooch on her crown. She was kinda surprised that I did that in front of her parents but I made my decision, there's no more holding back.

David was about to press the button going to the basement parking but I stopped him and pressed the G button instead. He looked at me in surprise but I didn't look at him.

"Don't worry, I booked a paid taxi cab. I'm sorry guys, I can't drive you home." Victoria was whispering to David what happened but he just hushed her.

As expected, David knows my silence. He might pin them out but he knows when to stop bothering me with dozens of questions.

I wait for them to ride on the cab which is in time when we went out in the entrance door. Afterward, I walked my way to the café where Luke is waiting.

I saw him sitting on the corner most the table with a cup of coffee in front of him. But I still ordered two coffee before I went to the table.

"Here. That coffee might have been cold by now." I blurted as soon as I approached him.

"That's fine. I didn't wait here to enjoy a freshly brewed coffee, anyway." He responded coldly.

"So... what do you wanna talk about that has to do with Enzey?" He added.

I clenched my fist as I feel nervous to bring this up right now. But I know this is what's best for us.

"Two weeks," I mumbled. And Luke stare at me in confusion.

"Enzey will be discharged on Monday. Give me two more weeks and I'll tell her everything. Let me tell it myself." I proposed but his expression is already telling me that he couldn't agree with this idea.

"Are you insane?! Did you forget that the Doctor advised that it would be better if Enzey would remember anything on her own and not by forcing her to do so? And now you are telling me you wanna tell her the truth?! Because of what? Your f*ck*ng conscience!? If you really love her, you wouldn't put her into a situation which she forcibly tried to forget." Luke exclaimed with so much exasperation.

"I can't stand staring at her eyes with so much joy from all these lies. I can't stand fooling her knowing that I am not the real owner of her heart anymore. I can't stand being temporary and being anxious each day in fear that she might be reminded how she loathes me since then." I looked down as I feel like I am too overwhelmed with the mixed emotions I am feeling right now.

"But how about Enzey's feeling?? What if she wanted everything to remain this way? What if she buried the bad memories from those seven years just so she can stop living in so much guilt? What if she suffers from this amnesia because she couldn't take the burden in her heart on the day of the accident? Have you ever thought about that?"

"Fooling her for so long won't justify it." I insist.

"Why can't you just enjoy the ride as much as you can?!" He anxiously exclaimed.

"And why are you so against for getting Enzey's memory back?! What's wrong with you, dude?!?" I start getting annoyed at his weird justification.

He should be the one who would want Enzey to get her memory back. The memory where he exists and where I am not part of anymore. Why is he holding on to his twisted reasoning? I can't understand him.

Luke clenched his hand into a fist as if he was looking at me. I thought he was about to punch me but he just took a deep breath as if he is holding back the fury within.

"You couldn't say that if only you can see her that night before the accident. She came to me full of tears in her eyes. I couldn't even have the chance to ask her what was wrong because I know, from that point, she was crying for someone else. And I know those tears shed for thousands of unspeakable pain."

I clenched my fist tighter as I feel guilty for not knowing I made her cry once again. I was foolishly busy calling her to seek for an explanation when I should have been trying to understand what she felt that night that makes her leave the pad hurriedly.

"Then she asked me to give her some time alone. I don't know what could have been the reason but I'm pretty sure she was weighing things real hard. Somebody might have been shaking her heart up and made her confused big time. Seeing her in a tight spot and how it pains her to be in that situation, I would willingly accept the fact that I am forgotten her memories than see her again suffering from that painful confusion." Luke added.

I couldn't talk back or even utter a single word upon hearing his reason behind it. I suddenly feel guilty that Enzey always suffers from tears and pain every time she gets involved with me. Was I being too selfish and caring nothing but for my own sake? I always say that I want nothing but her happiness but all I cause her was tears and heartaches.

Now, I start doubting my confidence if I could truly make her happy like the way I always claim when I keep pursuing her back to my arms.

"Now, if you've got nothing to say, just go back there and stay by her side. Because despite how much I hate to see her in somebody else's arms, she wants and needs no one but you."

I went back to the room and I knocked on the door but no one answered. Seeing Mrs. Almonte's stuff on the couch, she must be still in here. I sit right next to Enzey's bed as she was soundly sleeping like a child. She must have thought I wouldn't return anymore tonight.

I slowly tucked the strand of her hair behind her ears and inserts her hands inside the comforter to keep her warm. I stare at her and I can't believe I keep hurting this gorgeous and delicate young woman.

My eyes start clouding up with tears as I gave her a long and sweet smooch on her forehead. But as soon as I pull away, she suddenly moved and smiled at me, half-awake.

"I thought you are going home after you drop them home." She mumbled and I just smiled in response.

"Do you want me to get you some water?" I asked.

"Yes, please." She responds softly and slowly sits to drink her water.

But when she was about to get a sip of water, she dropped the glass on the floor and starts screaming as she starts pressing her head with both of her hands.

"What's going on, Enzey??" I asked in panic but she just keep on screaming from so much pain.

I was about to run to seek some help from the nurse or doctor but she held my arms and stop me from leaving.

She keeps massaging her temples her left hand while the other was holding onto my arms tightly.

"Please, Kree... don't leave me."