The Sacred Meets The Cursed

Off to Italy

Grace's POV

Graduation is fast arriving, I submitted my final research paper and now I am almost done with college. Mom and dad dropped by a few days back, they like Justin as well and do see him as their future son-in-law. They might have pushed me to study Business administration instead of letting me travel after high school but they never interfere in my personal life. Right now, I am sitting in front of my laptop, scrolling through my application. I wrote this a month ago but still haven’t made a decision on what to do with it. I wanted to apply and take off but at the same time, I don’t know if I can do it. I remember having this same dilemma after high school. I wanted to go to Arizona to take official photography classes in the rainforest with great photographers but my mom said and I quote, “You won’t survive a day with such a job.”

Being the baby of the house has its advantages but at the same time, no one believes that you can actually fend for yourself. Maybe she is right but I have the right to follow my passion. I was good in my studies and my parents want me to use my brain for something worthwhile. I got into Stanford but my heart belonged elsewhere. I mean can’t I use my brain for something I want? I was so mad at my family that I ran off, the farthest I reached was to the long beach. I have loved that place, it was the best place to play, stroll away from the city’s noises. My brother and I would always ride off on our bicycles there. It was a great time! Anyway, no good is gonna come out dwelling by about the past. I shut down the computer and laid my head on it. I want to discuss this with someone before I finally make a decision. Penelope is a great friend but Tom understands me better especially when it comes to my passion. I called him to see if he is in his apartment. Justin still lives with his older brother and one of his friends near the campus. Tom has a small studio apartment nearer to our apartment.

“Hey, bestie.” I got engulfed in a bear hug which I returned gladly.

“Hi, I need to talk to you about something and it’s very important.” I went in and showed him the letter which I have prepared. He read it with all his attention and looked at me.

“Are you serious about this?”

“I was barely able to print it out of my computer, after staring at it for an hour. I don’t know, tom. I was supposed to be free after graduation and now with Justin in the picture; everything is complex again.” I huffed. I heard sounds of some packets and I know what he was doing.

“Maybe take a break.” He said amusingly with a packet of kit Kat in his hand. I pulled it and started to munch on this delicious chocolate. “Grace, you pushed yourself all along the college in hopes of getting out even if it is for a certain time. I don’t want you to give up on that hope just because some guy thinks marrying right after college is a wise idea.” I laughed at him. “Besides, he hasn’t even proposed yet.”

“I saw Penny snooping through my Pinterest, that’s a definite sign.” I joked. “I am not giving up, it’s just that I feel like I owe him a proper explanation. I don’t know if I can continue this relationship, once I go to Italy. I don’t wanna hold back.” New courage builds up inside me. “I will put everything on the table and I will see where we go after that. Tell me one thing Tom, why do you think Justin got this serious all of a sudden?”

“I don’t know Grace, maybe he realizes it’s finally time to get serious. I know you don’t trust him when it comes to virtue so any step you take, keep that in mind.” He warned me. I drove up to Justin’s apartment. The night was already over the town, I could see college students roaming around. I saw people coming out of Justin’s apartment. Oh there is a party and I wasn’t invited, rude! The smokes made the visibility down to nothing, the music was too loud. The smokes and stink were making it hard for me to breathe freely. I coughed a few times and squinted my eyes to see clearly. Many students were our classmates and some junior year students were also here. I saw Jayden making out with his boyfriend, Matt.

I poked his back to get his attention. He was clearly irritated by the interruption but when he saw it was me, he gave me a toothy grin.

“Grace Darling, how have you been?” He gave me a side hug and so did Matt. We have a very good relationship as we hung out a lot while Jayden was still at Stanford.

“Where is Justin?” I asked him a bit loudly. Jayden looked around but could not place him.

“Maybe he is in his room.” I nodded and walked down the hall. The music was not too loud in this area. The door to his room was open, I saw him sitting on the balcony. He was talking with someone. I narrowed my eyes and saw that my boyfriend was here with a girl in very close proximity. The thing that agitated me was his hand on her waist and another twirling her blonde hair.

“Excuse me! Can I have a moment with you, Justin?” I said loud enough to push them out of their trance, with a smile. Justin froze in his place and the blonde was confused.

“Um sure.” She said in a low voice. “I will see you later?” It sounded more like a question but his eyes were fixed on me. Once the girl left I started,

“She asked you a question, Justin!” I gritted out.

“Grace…”

“I can’t believe I was so naïve to that that you changed. I came here so that I can clear out all the differences which we had but I don’t think there is anything left for us anymore.” I said and walked out of the balcony. I was out of his bedroom door when he held my hand and pulled me back in.

“Grace, listen to me, I wasn’t even doing anything. We were just talking like two usual friends.” He tried to justify himself.

“Right and if I didn’t come here then you would have held her hand and dropped her home, huh?” I averted my eyes from him and tried to control my shivers. “I don’t understand, we were doing fine. I thought that finally, I can think about a future with you. You know what I was right all along, I should have stayed away from you when we broke up for the first time. It was all just a game for you.” My voice is loud by now. He always found someone whenever we broke up but managed to wiggle his way back to me.

“I do care for you and I love you but I have needs too, grace. We have been together for 4 years but haven’t come closer than a kiss. I am only a man tending to my needs.” He took a step near me. “But I will stop, I promise. I even got a ring, baby. We will be happy together and I swear to god no girl can come near to you in any way. You are the one I love, Grace.” I stepped back and thought about what he said. This is what he did every time, he always had the stash of sweet words that would push me to ignore his mistakes. It was always a trap and it took me this long to realize it.

“I only matter to you because I have put my foot down when it came to sleeping with you. I am so glad I never gave in, you and I are done. You know what I don’t love you anymore and I don’t think I ever was in love with you but I was ready to give us a fair chance. I hope you find someone who tends to your need, Justin. Goodbye!” I turned on my heel and didn’t look back even once. I could hear him call my name but this was it. I am not falling for any of it ever again. I could not hear any of the loud music, the only thing on my mind was to get out of here. I took a long breath as soon as I was out in open. I felt like pressure is off of my heart. I suddenly feel alive and my heart isn’t struggling anymore. I know what I want and what I need to do. I rushed to the apartment and the first thing I did was to turn on my computer and sent the mail that has been in my draft for months.

Penny and Tom were with me trying to console me out of this breakup. I am really lucky to have such good friends. Tom’s solution was to fill ourselves with all flavors of ice cream. Penny and I went shopping. Tom is planning to stay here at Stanford after graduation while I am planning to take a vacation but first I will go back home. I spent the rest of my time at my job as a financial planner at a startup. I have already handed in my notice. Justin and I run in the same circle so avoiding him was a challenge. I just focused on my work and my friends. At the time which I had left, I searched about Italy and its culture. I don’t wanna suffer a cultural shock if I get a chance to get there.

Tomorrow is our graduation and it has been three weeks since I found my peace and got out of a very toxic relationship. The gang here doesn’t seem like a small problem, tom heard that some mafia is targeting our town. That’s scary! I am having this weird paranoia like someone is following but there are no traces. I only feel safe when I am here in the apartment, Penny is usually with Tom so I have the apartment to myself. Mom, dad, and Grayson will reach here for my graduation tomorrow. My phone pinged notifying me of an email. It was from Italy, I rushed to open it. Oh my god, I am in! Yesss…

I applied to a well-known gallery in Venice as an office administrator but the best part about this gallery is that they only accept nature enthusiasts and I sent them a few samples of my work. I got tom and penny on a video call and told them I got the job. One more reason to celebrate tomorrow. Grayson texted me that he will pick up mom and dad from the airport then meet me directly at the university. I was up early and ready for the day. I put on a blue dress that reached below my knees. When I reached, my family was already there waiting for me. I hugged them, I missed them so much.

“Oh honey, how are you doing? I heard about Justin.” She hugged me again and I gave a stern look to my brother who quickly looked up as if the sky was the most exciting thing to him.

“I am fine mom, really. Don’t worry.” I said with a smile that was actually genuine. I pinched my brother when our parents were not looking, for telling them about Justin.

“Ouch!” He screamed, mom was concerned but dad just shook his head in amusement.

I held my degree in my hand and for the first time in my life, I know where I am going after this. The way which I have chosen for myself might be difficult but I am ready to face it. I celebrated with my friends then returned to LA with my family. Grayson knew about Italy but I haven’t yet told my parents. While having dinner, I finally told them and boy was they made.

“You studied at Stanford to go work in a photo gallery?” Dad's voice was calm but I know the underlying disappointment.

“Dad, I know you want me to start working at the office with you but I need this. I listened to you all but now it’s time to listen to my heart.”

“We only want what’s best for you and going to a foreign country…”

“Dad!” I interrupted him. “I know that but now I can make my own decision and bear its consequences as well. I am not blaming anybody here but I am not gonna follow this fixed path you all have planned for me.” I got up, “My flight leaves tomorrow morning. I am not backing away from our corporation but I need to be sure of what I want and I really hope you all can come to terms with it.” I went to my room and Grayson came after some time.

“You know I am always there for you even if you are miles away from me. I am so glad that you are finally doing this.” I hugged him, I will miss him. Mom and dad also got up early and bid me goodbye with a light heart. The start of my journey was great and now let’s see what Venice holds for me. Italy, here I come…