My Best Friend, My Luna

Chapter 5

ELY

I couldn't stop thinking about her, no matter how hard I tried. Talia's disappearance had left me feeling shattered and hollow as if I were engulfed in a vast ocean of anguish. I had intentionally avoided Olivia for months, unable to face her after what had happened between us. It felt as though she had taken advantage of my vulnerability, and I couldn't bring myself to forgive her for it.

However, as time passed, my yearning for her only intensified. I recognized that entertaining such thoughts was inappropriate, especially considering she was my best friend, but my emotions defied reason. I longed to escape the pain caused by Talia's betrayal, and I believed that Olivia was the only one capable of aiding me in that endeavor.

Therefore, one day, I made the decision to pay her a visit. I rapped gently on her door, and when she opened it, her countenance displayed a mixture of surprise and confusion. I knew I owed her an explanation.

"Hey, Liv," I began, attempting to maintain composure in my voice. "Can we have a talk? Is that okay with you?"

"Um, sure," she responded, stepping aside to allow me entry. "Is everything alright?"

I shook my head. "No, Liv, everything is far from alright. I'm still in pain, and I require your help."

"My aid?" she inquired, her expression a blend of concern and curiosity.

Taking a deep breath, I gathered my thoughts. "I want you to be my f**k mate, Liv."

She looked at me, her expression filled with surprise, and I sensed an unintended breach of boundaries. Yet, my desire for her consumed my being entirely. I was willing to go to any extent to escape the torment that haunted me.

"What?" she whispered, her voice barely audible.

"Liv, I want your presence," I reiterated, taking a step closer. "I yearn for solace and the oblivion of my pain. Deep down, I believe only you possess the ability to aid me in achieving that. I assure you, Liv, it will be devoid of emotional entanglement. Purely a physical connection."

I noticed doubt lingering in her eyes, recognizing the grave misstep I had taken. Nevertheless, I couldn't retract my words. I had committed myself to this path.

"I'm unsure, Ely," she responded, her voice trembling. "I don't believe it's a wise choice."

"Please, Liv," I pleaded, reaching out to touch her cheek. "I need this. I need you."

She gazed at me for an extended moment before giving a slight nod. "Okay," she whispered. "Alright, Ely. I'll... I'll be your f**k mate,"

I experienced a rush of relief, pulling her gently into my embrace. "Thank you, Liv," I whispered, my gratitude overflowing.

I acknowledged the wrongdoing in using her this way, but the overwhelming desire to escape my pain overshadowed my judgment. The void Talia had left within me was too daunting to face alone, and seeking solace in physical intimacy seemed like the only remedy. I deeply regretted treating Olivia poorly, but my selfishness clouded my perspective.

When Olivia agreed to my proposal, a wave of happiness washed over me. It felt as though I was finally obtaining what I needed to heal from Talia's departure. However, Olivia's condition gave me pause. She wished for exclusivity, forbidding me from pursuing other romantic connections while we maintained this arrangement. Initially, I perceived it as a small sacrifice for my desires, but upon reflection, I realized the unfairness it imposed on Olivia.

I could not continue to take her presence for granted. She was my best friend, and I mustn't devalue her by treating her as a mere convenience. Upon introspection, I recognized the extent to which I had underestimated her since our youth. While aware of her affection for me, I never regarded it seriously. I regarded her only as a steadfast friend, someone who stood by me unwaveringly.

And now, I had the audacity to request her presence solely for my personal gain.

Despite my doubts, I consented to her condition. I understood that during this arrangement, I could not pursue other women, and I was prepared to do whatever it took to ensure her happiness. After all, she was my best friend, and I could not bear to inflict any more pain upon her.

The following week marked the commencement of our arrangement. The initial intimacy with someone I had always considered a friend felt peculiar. However, as time passed, I gradually grew more at ease with the situation. Olivia proved to be an extraordinary lover, intuitively comprehending my desires. It was a comforting experience to have someone who understood me so profoundly, both within and outside the boundaries of the bedroom.

But as our arrangement continued, a sense of incompleteness nagged at me. Talia remained ingrained in my thoughts, despite my best efforts to let go. Even as Olivia tirelessly worked to bring me joy, I couldn't shake the guilt that gnawed at my conscience, a betrayal in its silent presence.

One evening, nestled in the embrace of our shared bed, Olivia mustered the courage to ask if I still loved Talia. Initially, I hesitated, fearing the pain my words might inflict upon her. However, I soon realized that honesty was the debt I owed her.

In a barely audible whisper, I confessed, "Yes, I still love her. So much. She was my fated mate, Liv,"

Silence enveloped us, and Olivia's gaze held a mix of sorrow and comprehension. Then she softly uttered, "I've always known."

Her admission was bewildering, as if she had anticipated my confession from the start. Though voicing the truth wounded me, I felt a weight lifting from my burdened soul.

"I apologize," I murmured. "I know I shouldn't let my emotions take over me,"

"It's alright," Olivia replied, her hand reaching out to graze mine. "I understood the risks when we embarked on this journey. Ely, my intention was to help you, to offer that you still have someone despite feeling alone,"

Her words stirred an ache within me. Olivia possessed an innate goodness that I had taken for granted. I was undeserving of her unwavering help, yet she remained, endeavoring to k****e happiness within me.

"Thank you," I whispered, leaning forward to place a tender kiss on her forehead. "I can't think a world without you."

Olivia's smile conveyed a profound melancholy, betraying the hurt concealed within her eyes. I had wounded her deeply, and I grappled with my powerlessness.

I still love Talia, my fated mate. She's my... air.