By Michael Juha
----------------------
In my place that night, Sam did all the dinner preparations. “This is my treat Geoff, my way of compensating for what you have missed in me in two months. So let me do everything.”
“OK, you’re the boss!” I said.
Sam was always like that. Even with the group during our bonding, outing, or picnicking, he would take the initiative to do whatever he thought needed to be done. He would cook, grill, fry, wash dishes, carry something, gather firewood, or buy anything... He was full of energy, teamwork, and diligence.
When everything was done, he called me, “Jan-jarannnnn! There you go! The word for tonight is ‘grilled’: grilled chicken, grilled fish and grilled squid complete with sauce, tomatoes, onions and hot pepper, your all-time favorite!”
He reached for his knapsack and took one huge candle, lit it and placed it at the middle of the table. He took another item – a streamer with the words, “To the Best Friendship of Sam and Geoff!” He posted it on the wall.
“Wowwwww! How romantic – GRRRRRRRR!” I sarcastically remarked. “Don’t tell me you have roses for me too!”
“Hahahahahaha!” We both laughed, as he pulled out one chair and guided for me to sit on.
After our dinner, we drank at the terrace. As usual we talked about those normal things in school, what the group did when he was not with us, our plans for the next semester and for the future.
It was past 10 in the evening when we already felt the intoxication in our blood. The topic moved to some controversial ones.
“Sam, do you really love Miss Cathy?” I asked in a serious tone.
“Of course I do...” as he gulped the whole content of alcohol in his glass, and then another one.
“What happened to... your feelings for me? I’m sorry I brought this up again. I know you ignored this question in the garden.”
“Yeah, I intentionally ignored it. But you know, Geoff, I’ve promised myself not to talk about it anymore... what for? It’s not helping nor leading to anything. And even if it would lead to something, I wouldn’t want it. I just can’t... and I hope you would respect that.”
“What for...? You mean you lied to me when you said that?”
“I did not lie, Geoff and I’m not a liar! Just remember, I have never told you any lies!” he said raising his voice.
“Then why can’t you tell me straight if you still have that damn feeling?” I asked him in an equally raised voice.
“I can’t say anything and there is nothing to say! Look Geoff, I have swallowed my pride in saying that to you. Wasn’t that enough already? What more do you want? If you want to know, why can’t you just feel it, ok? How about this: do you understand why I still come here? Did you not notice I sent you a note just today and chose this timing, our last day of school and without the intrusion of our other friends? Did you not see that damn candle and streamer I was bringing with me in my bag for that stupid dinner? If you still don’t feel it, then you don’t deserve to be in that stupid honor’s list, Mr. Lopez, coz you’re an i***t! God…! If you only knew how my heart broke when I was away from you!” Sam shouted, laid his head on the table and sobbed.
I was glued there for a moment. I could not say anything, realizing how selfish, insensitive, and judgmental I was. I thought I knew Sam that much already.
“Yeah, you’re right Sam I just have to feel it, and understand...” I said to myself.
Then he went to the toilet and threw out. He was so intoxicated he could not walk straight back. So we stopped drinking and I helped him to bed... I wiped and cleaned his face, removed his shoes, socks, shirt, and changed his pants with my spare shorts.
As I watched him lay there, I couldn’t help admiring his sculpted abs with his fine black hairs lining down from his navel towards underneath his brief, his fair smooth skin, his robust chest and well-formed biceps, his lips, thick long hair, pointed nose, immaculate face. He looked so naive and perfect. The sight of him just took my breath away. “Here is this guy – so lively, full of vigor and whom many people so love and idolize but now lying vulnerably and seemingly lifeless in front of me,” I murmured and released a deep sigh.
I turned off the lights, lay on the bed beside him.
A few minutes later, he woke up, turned to me, hugged me and arched his legs over my midsection. He did not say anything. He just moved his head towards me; his lips searched mine and kissed me. I kissed him back. It was long and passionate. We relished every moment of it, playing our tongues in our mouths together.
We ran our hands and lips to every part of our body – the face, the neck, the chest, the stomach... everywhere. We savored every contact of our flesh, every touch of our skin, every breath we took together, filling the room with our moans as the cries of the cicadas and other nocturnal creatures filled the silence outside. And, when we both reached the summit, our moans got stronger and stronger and stronger. “Ahhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhh! Ahhhhhhhh!”
When we were done, we took some rest and did it again – a few times over until we lay flat on the bed in complete exhaustion.
Then he faced me, twiddled his hands on my cheek, his eyes overflowed with passion. “Geoff, I’m sorry I was angry. But I got to tell you this: I love you. I really do!”
My fingers reached for his mouth and covered it, “Shhhhhh, you don’t have to say it, Sam. I felt it already“
He pressed his lips against mine and the room was filled with our moans again...
(To be continued)