Mama I'm in love with a criminal

Chapter - 50 Why?

I get up in the morning to the smell of burned floorboard and papers. I snuggle closer to my blanket, trying to smell my mom’s scent.

I miss her, her memories are just making me feel guilty. I used to watch movies where people used to regret how they treated their parents just before they died and I…….I never, never ever thought that I would be in such a situation. Where whatever I do, I cannot change what I have done, not get a chance to rectify my mistakes.

I always made sure that I tell my parents through my gestures, that I love them. But I failed mom. I failed her, she was expecting me to be around, and I just left, just left.

In just a few days my worst fear has come true. I have been left alone. Tears start to escape my eyes and I push my face in the pillow and scream as tears keep poring down my eyes like a waterfall.

After a while, I get up. I go straight to the kitchen to cook myself something. I reach the door and then I turn around and leave, even the burned down kitchen reminds me of Hiram.

I walk back to my mom’s room, take my coat and march outside. I walk down the street and everything looks so unpleasant and unfamiliar. I had been on the dock for a few weeks and yet it seemed so lively and familiar and happy.

This place on the other hand looks different feels like I have never been here. I go the flower shop and even the florist seems to be in a bad mood or just being mean, can’t tell. I buy two bouquet of flowers and pay her. I just walk three steps forward and then I walk back to the florist.

“One more bouquet please.”,  I say and she hands me another bouquet of white lilies.

I take all the three bouquets and march towards the one place; I am hoping to find peace. The cemetery.

I walk inside the cemetery, standing infront of my father’s and mother’s grave. Both of them lying beside each other, like they always wanted. I put the white lilies on their grave and sit right infront of them.

Hours pass by and I keep sitting infront of them, my feelings manifesting from pain to sadness to anger to pain again, in a never ending cycle.

I get up to place lilies in James’s grave, the one man I failed. I really wish I had saved James that day. No amount of sorry or guilt can bring him back, but I still place the lilies and mouth,

“I am sorry James, I failed you. I will always miss you.”

By the end of the day my feelings had taken a different turn, and that was anger and I knew that sadness and grief were going to follow, but before that happened, I needed some answers.

I barge inside the prison and talk to the first guard I see,

“I want to talk to Hiram, bring him to the interrogation room.”

He checks the records, “There is no Hiram.”

“What? We brought him in yesterday, drug case. H.H.H, check again.”

He checks over the records, “oh yes, but his name is Harry.”

I guess I let him off too easy with some bullets probably should have gutted him and pulled out his organs.

“Fine, bring him in.”

I man nods and immediately goes away. I stand inside the interrogation room, preparing myself to be mean.

He is place opposite me,

“SO HIRAM..oh wait sorry sorry should I say HARRY, because that is your real name.”

He doesn’t say a word.

“So, HARRY. You must be wondering why I am here, though before I tell you that I want you to know that it gives me immense pleasure to see you in a wheel chair. I hope your ass is permanently glued to that thing.”

He sighs but doesn’t say anything,

“Well, you staying mum will not do you any good, because you can’t tell but I am seething in anger…so”

“I can tell.”, he says.

Finally muttering something, but it will have no effect on me.

I walk upto him and perch on the table infront of him and give me loud slap across his face. His cheeks go red and he slowly looks up at me,

“Well I say you can’t tell. It means, YOU.CAN’T.TELL. Got it.”

He just nods. I slap him once more. This time he looks at me wide eyed, as if saying what the hell.

“This is because of the fake name.”

His eyes go back to normal and he nods in understanding.

I get up from the table,

“okay so now that we know you can speak. I would like you to answer me. I know why you wanted to kill my mom and me, which is because you killed my dad, but why kill my dad? Because of the shipment?”

He sighs and again and I grab him by his cheeks,

“Listen HARRY. I cannot decipher your sighs, so you better speak up.”

I walk back and he finally speaks,

“You won’t believe it, but I didn’t kill your dad, neither was I ordered too. I am not H.H.H. I joined H.H.H after your dad died, that to because I heard that they were the ones who killed your dad. I thought that I owed your dad, so I came here to protect you guys in case you were in danger, he said so himself to me, but as it turned out that your dad was not helping me, he was on a path of redemption.”, Hiram says.

“What the f**k do you mean?”

“In simple terms your dad was no good human because he killed my dad who by the way was innocent.”