The fate of her love

CHAPTER 12

Jessie was shifted in the general ward. It broke me to see her with all the machines around her. She looked so fragile, like a fairy… a fairy choosing between life and death. What will my angel choose? Will she choose to stay with me or will she leave me but stay happy and unharmed by those who want to harm her? Of course if she is dead, she is not unharmed but that would be less painful for her, right?

It is funny how I an wishing for her death when I wanted her with me till my last breath. It is my mistake... I should have told her about her condition in the hospital itself. Maybe, this would not have happened. Or, I shouldn't have kept her in the farmhouse. Her condition became worse because of the delay. Yes, I am the one responsible for this condition of hers.

I held her hand softly but firmly. I love her and she won't leave me. I know that. I have no one in my life. God will never take her again, right?

I look at her lovingly. Suddenly, the machines start beeping. I call the doctor immediately. He hurried to the room and asked me to stay outside.

I went outside and sat on the cold typical steel chairs that hospitals usually have. Cold… that's what I was feeling...

Shanta and Ganpat were consoling me continuously but they didn't help much. Just then, Ammi and abbu also came and hugged me. I buried my face in ammi's neck and cried continuously.

Doctor soon came out and declared that her body was weaker than expected and she couldn't even survive her last 24 hours.

I was devastated. Yes, death seemed welcoming in her case but I have no one who can read my like I am a book, with whom I can spend my entire life, with whom I can cuddle in I sleep. Of course, Ammi was here but apparently, she can't satisfy my need to see and feel my Jessie. I lost her. She died, just like that...

How could she do that? She told me that she will never leave me. Still, she committed suicide, knowing that it will devastate me. She knew that I can't live without her. Why did she do this to me?

"Ammi, she is such a liar. She lied to me. Still, I can't hate her. Why Ammi, why? Why can't I hate her? Why can't I hate her when she lied to me? Why can't I hate her when she thought she could leave me? Why do I love her so much Ammi?"

I was behaving like a child who didn't get his chocolates, crying and throwing tantrums, hoping to get them. But no, she left me.

I could feel my eyes getting heavy. I closed my eyes and invited the darkness to engulf me in it's comforting hug...