Playing With Ice

Chapter 3

The first thing I felt as I started to regain my consciousness was my sweaty forehead. I wanted to lift my hand and wipe off the perspiration that had formed there but my arm felt too heavy to move. Thankfully, as if the god heard my plea, someone wiped my forehead for me a few seconds later, "Rayna?" I heard a soft voice ask, pulling the strings in my heart, "Can you hear me, sweetheart?"

It was Dimitri.

As if my body suddenly became alive when I heard his voice, my eyelids started to flutter open on their own record and I groaned, making noises as I woke up. Thankfully, the room wasn't brightly lit or else, it would have made my eyes sensitive.

I was in our room, tucked under the duvets in our bed to be exact. Dimitri was sitting on the armchair that he recently bought. He had pulled it up to the edge of the bed so he was sitting right next to me.

I looked up at Dimitri, trying to recall what happened before I went to sleep, "What happened?" I asked groggily, my voice was still thick with sleep. My foggy memories started to come back as I spoke and I realized I was on a date with him at the restaurant, "How-"

I couldn't finish my sentence as I stared up at him in confusion, "You had a panic attack" He answered for me, his eyes were pools of overwhelming concern for me.

A panic attack?

My eyes widened. Panic attack? Why...?

A sharp gasp left my lips when I remembered why I had a panic attack in the first place so I clamped my lips shut into a thin line in a vain attempt to stop myself from sobbing heartbrokenly. But it was already too late.

I curled myself into a small ball, hiding underneath the duvet. How can I let that happen? How can I let one small memory affect me this much? It was just ice cream...

I could remember vividly now. On that day, Danial and I along with the kids from the orphanage went out to spend the day in the park. It had started to rain then and Danial bought ice cream for the kids and me that day. We were eating that ice cream while playing in the rain...

Oh god, it hurts so much.

"I am so sorry, sweetheart" Dimitri murmured next to me. He didn't pry the duvet off me but I could feel his hand running up and down my curled-up frame soothingly, "Tell me how can help to make you better" He asked when my sobs didn't quieten.

This was something I needed right now. Comfort from him is the only thing that I crave for right now, "Just hold me from falling apart" I cried out, barely sounding coherent to my own ears. I wondered if Dimitri understood what I said, "It hurts me so much. As if someone had plunged a dagger straight into my heart" I bawled my eyes out when I felt my heart twisting and turning against my chest.

The pain felt unbearable.

I pushed the duvet off me hurriedly and threw myself onto Dimitri, my arms going around him, "At night I can't sleep. I kept seeing things that I wish I could erase without leaving a trace in my mind" I babbled, burying my face at the crook of his neck. I didn't care if he thought I was overreacting now. I would do anything to get rid of this heaviness in my heart.

Dimitri's arms wrapped around my small frame and he pulled me impossibly closer to him and started to play with my hair without saying anything. We stayed in that position for a few moments until my sobs turned into hiccups and eventually, I was too tired to shed another tear for the night.

"Why are you silent?" I asked him when the silence got too much for me.

His arms around me tightened, "I am listening to you" He said softly, "Keep talking if you want. Tell me everything you want to get off from here" He pulled away from me just enough to point his finger to my chest, his eyes going up to meet mine.

I wondered how he didn't flinch away from the sight of my face. Mindy had done some eye make-up on me earlier and I am sure that I looked like a raccoon now from all the crying that I had done.

Dimitri's eyes never left mine as he brought his fingers to wipe away those traces of tears off my cheeks. My eyes fluttered close when I felt the tip of his finger brushing away my tears, "At times I wonder what did I do to deserve a kind man like you in my life" I cleared my throat, "You always made sure to make me happy" I continued, opening my eyes.

The corners of his lips pulled up into a small smile, "I am glad that you noticed" He brushed away my hair off my face, "It is a little selfish actually. In making you happy, I found my own happiness" He said making me forget about all the pain I felt a few moments ago.

I couldn't help but chuckle at that, "That's too cheesy" I said with a shake of my head.

He beamed up at me, "You think so?"

I nodded my head, "Yes" I said, feeling a flicker of happiness when I see him smiling like this, "Where is Sheldon? I haven't seen him in days" I asked him, changing the subject smoothly. I didn't want to get all sweet right now just after a mental breakdown.

"He is taking care of something" He responded without missing a beat.

That caught my attention. What was so important that he was gone for days now? "Something as in?" I pressed, wanting to know what they were up to. His profession always scared me. Who knows who might be lurking somewhere, waiting for the right time to have their revenge on him...

As I had expected, his expression changed in a matter of seconds, "It is better if you don't know about it" He said, averting his hard eyes to somewhere else, "So, what do you want to do now?" He asked me, obviously wanting me to drop the subject.

I sighed. I didn't want to make him mad tonight considering he was the one who made me feel better just now, "I don't know, you tell me" I said, pulling away from him and flopping on the bed in front of him.

It seemed like he was thinking hard about something before a light bulb went off in his head and he started to grin, "Let's play some games-"

Dimitri didn't get to finish his sentence as someone started knocking on the room door, "Capo, you have to see this" I heard someone say, their voice had some urgency in it.

Dimitri stilled before springing to his feet swiftly and starting towards the door, "What's wrong?" I asked him when he was almost at the door.

He stopped dead in his tracks and slowly spun around to face me with a carefree smile on his face, "Nothing" He said, shaking his head."I have to step out for the night. Go to sleep. I will be back before you know it" He continued and exited the room, shutting the door behind him softly before I could ask any more questions.