The Layers of His Mask

15. I'm Not Like Other Girls

"Oh my God! That concert was f*****g amazing! I could watch Michael Clifford play guitar to every song they've ever written and never get bored, that's how hot he is." I put my phone on speaker, placing it on the counter so that I can clean the excess makeup from my face.

"I thought I was hot? I suppose that's fine too..."

"You're such a jealous loser sometimes."

"You gave me that one. A twenty three year old fawning over an eighteen year old? Not the best confidence booster."

"How do you know his age?" narrowing my eyes, I think I may already know the answer to this question. Wiping at my red lips I ask, "Did you stalk his Wikipedia page?"

"I may have glanced at it," he defensively responds. "Stalk is a strong word."

"Stalk isn't a strong word if you're jealous!" Hannah screams from the bedroom.

"Hannah...go away. And Alex, Stop! You're being such a creeper," I giggle.

"Yes Hannah, go away...Tell her again." He makes a grunting noise similar to Elvis'. I snort, cutesy.

"Give me that phone." Hannah grabs my phone from the counter and stalks back to my bedroom.

"Hannah!" I scream. I hurriedly wash my face and sprint, jumping onto my bed to join my two best friends. "Give it here."

"...I was starting to like you too. Too bad the only hot thing about you is that body of yours."

"Thanks for the compliment. Though you may want to take a consensus in the room and ask who there likes you, versus me." This is going to go down so badly, I can feel it.

"Alright then, raise your hands bitches if you prefer Alex to me."

"Becca isn't a b***h by the way. Take that back."

“I’m not a b***h either…” Violet adds.

"She is my b***h and you are my b***h Violet, now hush. Hands everyone?" She blinks over to me then to Violet, seeing our hands raised. Violet and I exchange blank glances then burst into laughter. "Seriously?! You guys suck! f**k you both." She tosses my phone to the foot of the bed.

“If it makes you feel any better I didn't raise mine,” Alex loudly says.

"You know we love you!" I coo, pouting my lips, leaning over to kiss her cheek. She shoves her hands in my face before they can come in contact with her skin.

I think I hear Alex actually laughing in the background. I'll let him listen to this madness a little while longer, he needs to laugh more.

"Get your damn face out of my face.” her palms press against my lips.

"Hold her down Violet!" I mutter into her hands. Violet pounces onto Hannah, securing her hands above her head.

"Do it," Violet urges, looking me in the eyes and laughing.

Hannah begins wriggling underneath Violet, she's not strong enough to break the hold. I slowly lower my lips to her face, planting kisses all over it. She scrunches her eyes closed. "Okay! Stop! I'm not mad anymore, okay?" She chuckles, shaking her head profusely. Her claim is a legitimate one, so we release her.

"Oh my God, Violet we need to show you our dance we made up to 'Heart Attack Again'. It's amazingly awesome."

"Well let's see it."

"I'm still here you know," Alex chimes in.

"I know!" I shout back. "I'm going to have Violet record it and send it to you."

"Alright," he chuckles, "call you back later."

"Bye!" We all scream simultaneously.

I hop off my bed, connecting my laptop to my red beats pill via Bluetooth. I search through my music files, my mouse landing on 'heart attack again' while Hannah joins me at the space in front of the bed.

We begin lip syncing to the lyrics of the beginning - air guitar and bass in place - and then the dance we made up starts.

"Meet me in the back..." we bounce from toe to toe, pointing one thumb over our shoulders. "Start it up again..." still bouncing, we point our thumbs to the ceiling. "Give me heart attack..." we continue to bounce. Leaning over, we place our hands over our hearts. We spin around, backs facing the camera. "Then we're doing it again..." pointing our index fingers to the floor, we roll our hips in a circular motion - our heads turning in time with our hips.

Violet yells, "got it!" and joins us when the song loops, picking up on our not so difficult dance routine fairly quickly.

****

"Alright, listen up please!" Alex shouts over the music of banging pots and pans. "Two chicken, one beef bourgeois - medium rare. Three scallops, and four lobster mac and cheese."

I get to work on my part of the order. Beef Bourgeois. Alex has me keeping my distance from all seafood now. He apparently has this idea stuck in his head that I may happen upon another shellfish disaster, so he had me switch to focusing on the grill and the gas range stove.

I place a medium sized piece of sourdough bread on the grill, flipping it to get a nice char and grill mark on each side. Once that is finished, I place it on the small, light wood cutting board next to the stove. I start on sauteing the beef bourgeois in it’s rendered juices. With a flick of my wrist, the pieces of beef turn once in the air, landing back into the skillet.

“Someone’s being a little show off,” Nick mutters next to me.

“I've always wanted to try it, just because it makes me look cool,” I shrug. “I just didn't want to make you jealous of my amazing skills.”

“Yeah, that sounds like you,” he laughs, pouring a small amount of white wine into his skillet with the chicken. He tips the skillet towards the running flames just enough to set the whole thing ablaze. Amber and blue shoot up from the pan, simmering down quickly when he swirls the ingredients over the chicken.

“Nick, time on the chicken please!” Alex shouts from across the room. I look up from the skillet in my hand to find him burning a hole in Nick.

“One more minute chef!” Nick yells back, paying no mind to the tone of his voice in which he shouted those words.

“Stop,” I mouth to Alex, “he isn't doing anything.”

Pointing to Nick, he angrily mouths back, “He’s talking to you.” I roll my eyes and turn away.

Nick and I finish up our dishes and bring them up to present to Alex. He checks to see that they are up to his standards and I stay behind to watch while he plates them...and to figure out why the hell he is jealous of one of the few guys he actually talks to here.

Placing my hand on the counter beside him I ask, “What is your deal?”

“Deal? I don’t have a deal.”

“Yes you do. You’re acting like an ass about it for no reason.” He turns to face me.

“I know, I just wanted to get you away from him.” he winks at me.

“Ass,” I reply, the corner of my lip pulling up.

I watch as he shifts his gaze back down to the plate. His features tense up. I've come to know this as his focus face. Alex spoons the beef bourgeois across the garlic clove sourdough bread I grilled earlier. The brown gravy runs over the sides. He bends down closer to the plate, lightly sprinkling fresh parsley across the dish. Who knew a man like him could be so gentle...

“Good job, it’s perfect.” he smirks down at the plate.

“Thank you...Chef Brooks,” I speak softly into his ear.

He steals a quick kiss from me while no one is looking. I return to my station after that, now feeling overly determined to not let that be the last time our lips meet today.

****

Finishing up the last few dishes, I feel a light tap on my shoulder. Aubrey is standing behind me, arms now folded across her chest, one brow raised.

"I saw that earlier."

"Saw what?" I answer, laughing lightly and tilting my head to one side.

"You know exactly what," she whispers next to my ear. "You didn't tell me that you and Alex were officially dating." Her eyes look like they about ready to pop out of their sockets.

"That's because I don't even know if we are dating. We haven't discussed it. We just hang out quite a bit, and kiss a lot more than that..." We also may have almost had s*x in a public bathroom.

"You're definitely dating, just not in so many words. Nick and I were the same way when we started, we were just a lot more open than you two."

I dry my hands off against my apron. Alex isn't all that open as you can see. It took him almost a month to stop yelling at me and about three weeks after that to ask me on a date.

"You two dating? That's awesome!" Nick hooks an arm around Aubrey's petite waist. How the hell did I not even hear his footsteps coming near?

"Keep your voice down," she hisses. "She's still in school and she works for him." Please don't remind me.

"Sorry..." Nick softly apologizes, shrugging one shoulder apologetically.

"It's okay. Just don't repeat any of this to anyone," Aubrey quietly requests.

"Gotcha, babe." Nick pecks Aubrey on the cheek.

"Well since you two are dating now," he whispers, "would you two want to join Aubrey and I on a double date to Dave and Busters? Alex owes me air hockey." He takes his bottom lip between his teeth, wiggling his brows.

"Sure," I laugh, "let me just see if Alex is okay with that." I look around for him, only to see that he's nowhere to be found.

Where the hell did he go?

"Did anyone see where Alex went?" I glance around once more. Maybe I missed him? Still no Alex. They shake their heads no. "I'll just text him."

"Damn girl, you got the digits too?" Nick teases.

"I sure as hell did," I reply, pursing my lips. Nick and Aubrey laugh.

I go to my contacts and press the yellow mail icon next to his name.

Where are you? Nick and Aubrey want us to join them at Dave and Busters.

In my office, he sends back. Care to join me? ;)

We won't make it there if I do.

Fine by me.

No. I'll meet you outside.

Be that way :-P

Don't stick your tongue out at me lol, I reply.

Never underestimate the power of an emoticon. It was meant in a literal sense.

Just meet me outside... We can finish that discussion later.

****

Alex insisted on picking me up this morning, so he ended up dropping me off to my apartment first to shower and change. I went with casual: skinny jeans, a white halter top and light jacket with black flats. He begged me the entire time to wear a dress. We are going to an arcade full of teenagers and children...I am not wearing a dress.

Twenty minutes later we arrive to a gated black and white apartment community. They appear to be newly built. And they have a f*****g parking deck! A f*****g parking deck? Really?!

"A f*****g parking deck?!" I turn to him, eyebrows drawn togther.

"You've repeated that about three times already," he chuckles.

"I know, but I've never seen an apartment complex quite like this. It's like spotting a t-rex."

"Those don't exist anymore."

"Exactly," I slowly nod.

We exit his car and I follow him to the elevator located just off to the side of the parking deck. We step in and he presses the number four. Ascending to level four fairly quickly, we stop outside apartment number four - one - zero. He turns the key in the lock and opens it, sweeping his hand toward the door.

"Ladies first."

I'm extremely nervous, I have not stepped foot inside another man's apartment in years. Let alone a man that I'm extremely attracted to... and care for.

Pine and chocolate hit me the instant I step into his apartment. It smells just like his cologne and favorite food. It's dark and he flips a switch on somewhere behind me.

I walk further into his apartment, examining each and every thing it contains. There's a black leather couch in the middle of the living room. Underneath that couch is a navy blue and grey area rug, the dark wood flooring being the perfect contrast to it.

His kitchen is off to the right - the grey, black, and navy blue theme continuing throughout. I would usually say too much of one color tends to be overdoing it, here...it works.

"I'm going to go take a shower. You can take a seat on my bed or in the living room, your choice. My room's just down the hall."

"Okay," I nod. "I'm gonna finish looking around first."

With a nod of his head, he saunters down the hallway. Once I am done exploring every inch of his mid-sized apartment, I follow the path he led down that same hall. I stop, catching a reflection off something on the wall. A row of pictures are hung in dark blue frames, each descending a level below the other. I take my time in meticulously observing each one.

I run my fingers over the cool glass, each picture differentiating from the last. A picture of him as a child playing t-ball. Another of someone I assume to be his mother and possibly a younger sister - the woman cradling a baby. The last one I come across strikes me the hardest. There is a man in a hospital bed, attached to a multitude of wires. The man is most likely his father, he looks just like him minus the beard. Alex is seated on the hospital bed next to him with an arm around his shoulder, grinning from ear to ear. He looks so happy in this picture, he should definitely smile more often, his smile is gorgeous.

Must make mental note to force him into laughter.

I hear music playing down the hall - coming from his room I assume. I follow the sound of it, the smell of pine becoming stronger the closer I get to it - the smell of chocolate fading.

I open the door hesitantly - not quite sure what to expect - that has been partially cracked open. His room is dimly lit from the black shaded lamp resting on his end table next to the bed on the right. His bedroom walls are painted a light grey, bed decorated in a plain black sheet set with a dark blue thin blanket stretched across the bottom. His wood flooring continues all throughout the house I see.

I hear the running water stop in the bathroom off to the left. I take a seat on the end of his bed while I wait for him to get changed.

‘I Wanna Be Yours’ by Arctic Monkeys plays through the small pair of black speakers placed on his dresser. He emerges from the bathroom, water dripping from his torso, towel snug around his waist.

His head hung down and he runs a separate towel through his hair.

His eyes catch mine when he lifts his head up. They continue to hold them until he walks over to his dresser, opening the top drawer - pulling from it a pair of navy blue boxer briefs.

With his back facing me - one hand on the waist of his towel - he unravels it, dropping it to the floor, the towel pooling at his feet. His ass is all muscle when he reveals it to me. I've never been attracted to assess, he just may have swayed me.

His back, those thighs...oh my God. I lift my eyes to the ceiling.

The temperature has risen about twenty degrees in this room. I fan myself, the air from my hand being not nearly enough to cool me down. I clench my legs together, the growing pain between them begging to be eased needs to stop. Now. I calm myself and look back to him.

Slipping on a pair of navy boxer briefs, he turns around to face me. His tongue swipes out to wet his lips. Before I know it, he’s leaned over me, hands planted on the bed at the sides of my waist. His eyes drift down to my lips then to my eyes before he presses his lips to mine - lowering my back to the mattress as he climbs on top of me. He tugs on my bottom lip with his teeth. “We could begin where we left off last,” he groans into my neck, grinding his hardened length between my legs.

It feels good, so, so good. I open my legs wider. How I ever got away with not wanting to be with him for this long is beyond my level of understanding. But we have somewhere to be. “We can't,” I breath, closing my eyes. I begin to move in time with the thrusting of his hips, my body defying everything my mind is telling me not to do. His nose nestles into the crook of my neck.

I feel him stiffen underneath the fabric of his boxers, pressing into my clit. He hits it in just the right spot, sending my back arching. “We can,” he growls. His mouth moves back to my lips.

“We really can't...Alex," I moan. “We have to meet Aubrey and Nick at eight.” His movement against me stops. He climbs off of me and I sit up on my elbows. “Are you mad?”

He looks over his shoulder at me, slipping a navy sweater over the white t-shirt he now has on.

Damn those abs. It's a shame to cover them up.

“No, I’m not mad.” His voice is laced with frustration.

I climb off the bed, walking up to him and wrapping my hands around his waist from behind. I kiss his back, turning my head so that my cheek is now resting on it. “It sounds like it. I want to Alex, trust me. I just...not right now.”

He brings one of my hands up to his lips and kisses it. “It’s fine, Becca. I’m not going to force you into something you don’t want to do. I have far more respect for you than what you think I do.”

****

Our Dave and Busters visit is in full swing, Alex and Nick are in a close game of air hockey; Aubrey and I are sipping margaritas while watching them.

“Cheater!” Nick yells, reaching across the table and hitting the puck.

“I don’t cheat,” Alex defends, pushing the puck into the opposite end. “I’m just skillful.”

Aubrey and I laugh to each other, shaking our heads at their competitive natures. The game ends, Nick with a score of ten, Alex with a score of twelve. Nick points to Alex, a smirk on his face. “We’re gonna play again before the night is over.”

“Bring it,” Alex challenges, shrugging his shoulders. Seeing him become so focused, and competitive tugs on something in me.

“I want to play some basketball against Alex. One-hundred dollars says I beat you.”

The corner of his lip curls up into a devilish grin. “Your loss.”

“I so want in on this bet.” Nick pulls a hundred dollar bill from his pocket. I see Aubrey retrieve one from her wallet as well.

“I would like all of the money from tonight’s winnings to go towards a Macy’s gift card please, and thank you.”

“What has gotten into you tonight?” Aubrey questions - laughing - taking another sip from her frozen strawberry margarita.

“This,” I respond, raising my margarita glass. I place it down on the table next to Aubrey and go and stand next to Alex at the shout out hoops. “Ready to lose?”

He smirks my way and then turns back to the net in front of him. The timer counts down to one and we begin. I throw one basketball after the other, landing almost every single one. Shot after shot, I see my score rise, pushing me to gain even more. Alex tries shoving my arm to distract me while trying to throw basketballs in the hoop ahead. He also lifted up his shirt. He knows what his abs to do me.

I peek over to Alex’s score, his is not far behind mine. The five minutes we had are almost up. Five, four, three, two, one. The buzzer sounds off - I’m breathing heavily - adrenaline coursing through me. My score reads fifty, Alex’s, forty-seven.

“Oh my God…” I pant, “I won. I f*****g won!” I scream. “Yes!” I shift over to Alex who doesn't appear to be amused in the slightest.

“Stop screaming, please.”

“Cheer up Alex, you can’t win them all. By the way, I was totally serious about that gift card.” I start dancing in a circle around him, shimmying my shoulders the entire way around.

Alex walks off and takes a seat beside Aubrey at the table, sipping his sweet tea. I play another round to earn more tokens. I have my mind set on getting the large Nerds Rope from prize room.

“You're really good at this.” I hear a raspy voice say from beside me.

“Thanks,” I smile widely. I look to my right once I'm finished ripping off the stream of tickets. A blonde haired, green eyed boy is standing next to me.

“Oh God..." the boy begins swinging his foot back and forth against the maroon carpet, his hands deep in his pockets.

"What?" I giggle, straightening up and stuffing the tickets into my designated bucket. I tuck my loose hair behind my ears.

"This is stupid," he mutters, eyes lowered.

"What's stupid?"

"My friends dared me to come over here and talk to you. But now that I'm here I can't even look at you."

"Awww, well you're talking to me right now," I remind him, placing a hand on his shoulder. A small smile appears on my lips. This boy can't be any older than fifteen I'd say. But his cheeks are stained with red and it's absolutely adorable.

“You don't have to make me feel better because they also wanted me to get a kiss from you..." his voice trails off.

“Oh really?” I put my hands on my hips. “And why did they do that?"

"They say that I'm shy and I need to get comfortable with women if I ever want a girlfriend."

"You have never had a girlfriend?” He’s so cute and nice. Him having trouble getting a girlfriend is a bit strange for me to comprehend.

“Nope…” he shakes his head.

“I can’t imagine why. You’re a really sweet guy.”

“It’s hard for me to talk to pretty girls. I usually stutter with my words or I freeze up and don’t say anything at all. I once stared at a girl when she came up to talk to me and she told me I was a freak when I didn't respond.”

“You are not a freak, trust me. If you were I wouldn't be sitting here talking to you right now,” I laugh.

His shoulders shake when he chuckles. “You’re so easy to talk to. Why can’t all the girls at my school be like you?” he frowns.

“Well, I'm not like other girls. I'm actually a bit weird and a little awkward.”

"I gravitate towards awkward and weird," he says. "That's how I met those guys over there." He points to a table with three guys sitting at it.

A crooked smile appears at the corner of his lips and I lean down to kiss his cheek. His eyes widen in response. The blush in cheeks darken.

“Would you like to join me at the prize center?” I extend my arm out to him. “I hear they have these really long Nerds Ropes that you pay an arm and a leg for.” I shove his shoulder with mine when his face turns about as white as my shirt. “Don’t over-think it, okay? Make you friends a little jealous.”

“Okay.” He loops his arm with mine and we walk to the prize center together, examining all the different, overly expensive candy they have to offer.

Surprisingly we have enough tickets to buy three Nerds Ropes and some cotton candy. Well I wouldn't have had enough had I not stolen Alex’s tickets after he walked away like a sore loser earlier.

“Want one?” I offer him a nerds rope. He retrieves from my hand.

“Sure, thanks. I love candy.” he grins and opens the package, ripping off a piece with his teeth. “My mom tells me I will end up having to get a root canal if I don’t slow down on all of this.”

I laugh at the similar words Alex had told me on our first date. “You know this guy I’m dating told me something along those lines when we first started going out. Except he told me I would end up with cavities.”

He laughs and I join in with him. “What’s your name?” I ask as we make our way back to the game room.

“Chase. Yours?” he asks, taking another bite of the candy rope.

“My name’s Rebecca, but you can call me Becca,” I say with a smile.

“Cool.” he nods his head. “Well I better get back to my - “

“Where did you two go?” Alex asks, standing beside me.

“I had Chase walk with me to the prize center. His friends forced him to come over and talk to me,” I half-laugh.

“Did they have you come over here and try to get a kiss from her too?” Alex is staring the kid right in the eyes and he’s not even flinching. I admire his bravery.

“They did actually. But I didn't force it out of her, you can ask her yourself.” Alex looks to me and I confirm Chase’s statement with a nod of my head.

“We’re leaving,” Alex shortly replies. He turns on his heels and walks away.

“I’m sorry Chase, I have to go.”

“It’s cool. It was nice meeting you, Becca,” he says with a small smile.

“You too,” I shout behind me while I jog to catch up with Alex.

"Alex!” I grab his shoulder and yank him to a stop. “Tell me what's going on?"

"Nothing."

"Please, just tell?" I wrap my arms around one of his.

"I said nothing,” he angrily raises his voice then lowers it. “Let's go."

****

What happened earlier was not nothing, but he would not talk to me the entire ride to my place. He drove me back in silence. He didn't even bother to kiss me when I walked around to his side of the car and dipped my head through his window.

He dismissed me with a, "goodnight Rebecca" and then drove off - leaving me standing confused as well as upset at the bottom of the steps leading up to my tiny apartment.

Did he really just go back to calling me Rebecca?

Why did he shut down so suddenly? I did nothing wrong, he just took his jealous tendencies a little too far by jumping to conclusions about a small kiss that meant nothing. It wasn't like it was on the lips.

Alex has no confidence in knowing that I'm fully invested in what we have and no one can change how I feel for him. Chase was a kid - a teenager. An innocent fifteen year old with some friends that reminded me a lot of my own.