Hawk

15 - To get his attention

Brooke

I didn’t want to leave Hawk’s grandparents. I would love to have stayed there longer, but it was time to come home. The past few weeks have flown by. Hawk and I found a beautiful little house to rent across the street from his parents. Not everyone’s first choice is to move so close to their parents, but Hawk and I don’t mind it.

Taylor and I had so much fun painting Gabe’s room. We laughed and talked about our men. Taylor told me stories of when she and Jack were younger and the fun adventures they had. I find it easy to talk to Taylor; we have a close relationship.

Taylor is also brilliant with Gabe, and he loves her so much. I love watching him smile at her each time he sees her. He’s a real grandma’s boy. But then, so is Mark. Jack told me that Taylor was the same way with Hawk and Wrench.

There aren’t many souls in the world as pure as Taylor Anderson, and if my son has even half her grace when he grows up, I’ll be proud to tell the world where it came from.

I’ve been learning martial arts with Nova since we’ve been back. I learned from Maria that ever since Willow was almost killed, Nova has been holding self-defense classes for the women of the club, even the children, on the weekend because she believes they have the right to protect themselves as much as we do. I couldn’t join in such things when I was around before because I never had the time. But I can now.

I can’t deny that Nova is a damn slave driver, though. She pushes us all hard to prove we have more inside of us to give. Initially, it was tough, and I wanted to give up almost instantly. Nova got up in my face and yelled at me. She told me the man attacking me and trying to rape me wouldn’t care how weak I was; he’d get off on it. Then she told me the same man would think twice about going up against a woman who knew how to fight back and win.

It was hard to take; Nova is a scary woman when she gets going. However, deep down, I knew she wasn’t trying to hurt me; she was trying to release the inner animal. It worked, Nova was right, and there was no way I would ever allow myself to be so weak a man would get the better of me, not without putting up a damn good fight.

All the training with Nova and the other women and my therapy have helped me in many ways. I feel stronger-minded and stronger in my body. I feel happier within myself, and that makes Hawk happy, therefore making our little boy happy. That’s all I want, a happy husband and little boy.

I also have a job now. I’m so pleased with myself. I’m working at Draven Vidal’s restaurant. I’m primarily a kitchen hand, but I’m learning so much from Marcel, the chef. He’s funny, smart, and doesn’t mind showing me new things daily.

I’ve always wanted to be a chef, but I pushed it to the back of my mind years ago. But I was excited when Maria said there was an opening at her brother’s restaurant and that she had put in a good word for me. However, I thought perhaps it was too soon to go back to work. Gabe was only a month old. But Maria told me I could work part-time, just a couple of hours a day, until Gabe was old enough for me to go full-time.

I spoke to Hawk, and he encouraged me to go for it. He pushed even more after coming home each day to find I’d baked or cooked something else he’d never tried. He loves my cooking, and I love feeding him.

Marcel was so impressed with me the other day that he called Draven into the kitchen to see me in action. I made Draven’s favorite pasta dish, Rigatoni al Forno, a baked pasta dish with a splash of white wine.

I watched nervously as Draven ate a forkful of pasta. His face gave nothing away. He swallowed and looked at me briefly before saying, ‘The only other person who could make that dish taste this good was my mother.’ My heart skipped a beat, and I couldn’t help smiling wide. ‘Put it on the menu, Marcel. Make sure Brooke is in charge of perfecting it.’

‘You got it, boss.’

‘Keep up the good work, Brooke. You’ll be a chef in no time.’ Draven winked at me.

‘Thank you so much.’ I smiled, but I was overwhelmed and so grateful that he thought so much of me.

The confidence I felt in myself that day has kept my work attitude upbeat for weeks. I love my job, and I love my life. However, Hawk wanted us to be married by now. He said we should have been married by the end of last month. As badly I wanted to marry him, I didn’t want a rushed wedding. I want to be married with my sister by my side. I want everything to be perfect. Rushing things, I know we’d miss something out. Something important.

I have agreed we can get married sooner rather than later. I just want everything to be perfect. Hawk and I deserve the best wedding in the world, and I will not settle for anything less. Hawk agreed, and I could not have been happier. He told me I could have any dress I wished and then asked if I would like him to walk down the aisle in his birthday suit and give everyone a show.

Why would he ask such a thing!?

I laughed loudly because I couldn’t stop myself, which made him laugh. I asked if he believed everyone else would like to see him like that. Though Hawk is the sexiest man alive, I had no clue why he would say such things, but I knew he was joking around to make me happy. So, I playfully slapped his chest and told him, No, his body is for my eyes only, and that is the way he will stay. Hawk told me that he is all mine, now and always. Then he kissed the shi.t out of me. I had to pull away before I ground puss.y against him until I came.

I’ve been so desperate to have him inside of me; it drove me crazy for days. God knows why I’m so horny for him, but I am. Luckily for me, the six-week period is over. Actually, it’s been eight weeks. I got the all-clear from my doctor two weeks ago, but Hawk said he wasn’t comfortable having se.x for a while longer.

I didn’t take offense because, honestly, I didn’t feel ready either. However, tonight, I want my man to make love to me.

I don’t know if I did the right thing in letting Taylor take Gabe for the night, but I want to talk to Hawk about something, and I don’t want to be interrupted. I have to admit that I miss my baby already, and I feel terrible that I’ve allowed my eight-and-a-half-week-old son to sleep away from me. But I do not want him to hear his parents getting passionate with one another.

Is that stupid?

I must say that Hawk was amused when he walked through the front door, and I told him Gabe wasn’t here tonight. I thought he'd be a little pissed at me, but he wasn’t. He kissed me and told me he loved me, and as much as he loves Gabe, a night alone is just what we need.

I tried my hand at orange chicken with white rice for dinner. I wasn’t sure it had turned out right, but Hawk ate three helpings before finally telling me he’d have to work out twice as hard to keep the weight off if I kept feeding him so well.

I laughed so hard, happily even. It makes me feel so good to know I’m taking such good care of him. My life is almost perfect right now. I’m getting married in a few weeks; I have my little boy, my own home to live in, and my huge chosen family. All that’s missing from my life is my sister. I miss Marnie so much; it hurts to think about her.

As much as I miss Marnie, I have to push the thought out of my head for now. There is something important I need to speak to Hawk about.

After dinner, I cleared the dishes and ensured my kitchen returned to its rightful self. Now we’re sitting curled up on the couch watching TV.

“Dante, can we talk?”

“About anything you want.”

I lift my head from his chest to his shoulder and look at him as he continues to stare at the TV. I smile to myself; I don’t see what’s so interesting in an old car show.

I smile and lay my hand on his face, forcing him to look at me. “I’m trying to get your attention here.”

He laughs, grabs the TV remote, and clicks it off. “Sorry, baby.” He turns on his hip to better face me, and I shift so I’m a little more comfortable. “What do you want to talk about?”

I love him so much. The six-week waiting period for us to have se.x is over, our son is with his grandparents, and my man still hasn’t tried anything. I know he must have blue balls the size of an elephant by now. I don’t think that I could have been any more obvious tonight that I wanted him. Shy of stripping naked in front of him and yelling for him to fuc.k me.

Men!