Growing Up With My Mate

9. Trust

Brighton POV

           My father tells me to not rely on people words, but their actions.  You can say something a million times, but if you don’t follow through with what you say, then you are not the person you say you are.  I’m glad to call Harrison my friend after tonight.  He made a vow to the group to protect, and he did.  My faith in him grew with each word he said, and he even sent Clara away, which I know everyone was happy about.  His authority dominated the room, and he hasn’t even had his first shift yet! The fact that he protected my vulnerable moment with the group made my heart flutter.

Even when I was a little girl, I always wanted to save myself for my mate.  Even small kisses on the cheek felt like I was cheating my mate out of something special.  After telling the group my thoughts, I felt embarrassed because I know not everyone shares my values.  When I first told Dustin, he said he felt the same way but he couldn’t make any promises because of his hormones, and that’s when we declared me the alpha of our friendship, not him.  With all jokes aside, Clara’s remark to belittle me only encouraged my stance on my firsts.  I don’t need to be sexy or cute for everyone.  I just need to be me, and hopefully that will be enough for my mate.

After Clara left, we all watched a movie.  Everyone left except for us 5 girls who initially planned a girl’s night.  Everyone was passed out asleep and I’ve been tossing and turning for over an hour.  I’ve never been good about sleeping in places other than my bed.  I decide to do some mental exercises and get my sketchbook out, because I don’t like forcing myself to sleep.  I walk out of the rec room, down the hall, and into the kitchen so I can have some lighting without disturbing the girls.  I open up my sketchbook and look at my drawings I have done so far this year.  Mr. Chapman gave me a new sketchbook at the beginning of the school year since my other one was used up.  I try to refuse it at first, but he said he wanted me as his protégé and wanted me to keep up with him, and that I should think of it as more like a resume for future artworks.  It’s almost filled up sketches of nature: flowers, trees, landscapes, bugs.. I’ve drawn my parents and Dustin a few times as well.  I flip to my most recent sketch of a wolf.  I have simple outline so far, so I guess that’s where I’ll start tonight.

Zoning into my art, I never have a concept of time.  What started as an outline turned into a detailed sketch of a wolf surrounded by a bed of clovers.  I try focusing on the shading of the fur and the eyes when I hear the doors swing open.  I jerk my head up to see a wide eyed, very tired, very shirtless Harris walking into the kitchen.

 “Brigh!- what are you doing up?”  As if he doesn’t know he’s not wearing a shirt, he goes to the fridge and gets out a tub of chocolate ice cream.  I turn around so I’m not staring too hard at him and feel myself blushing.  I have got to get this under control.

“I-I can’t sleep.  I’m a light sleeper.  It’s just easier to keep myself occupied than force myself to sleep.”

He plops down across from me with his container of ice cream and two spoons, and I continue, “I decided to draw for a little bit and didn’t want to disturb the girls with the lighting… I hope it’s okay to be in here.”

“Of course it is.”  He slides a spoon over to me.  “I’ve been getting major sweet tooth lately- I think it’s because my shift is soon.  When I wake up in the middle of the night with cravings, I just come down here and eat ice cream.  I already went through 2 tubs upstairs.”

He opens the container and puts in the middle of the table.  After he scoops up his first bite, I grab  my own. We sit in comfortable silence as we each grab spoonfuls back and forth.  After I’m done, I push the container closer to Harris, earning me smile, and I take my spoon to the sink. 

“Thank you for handling Clara tonight,” I state, rinsing off my spoon.  I turn around and lean against the sink.  Harris is in the middle of a bite staring at me.  I continue on “I don’t trust a lot of people because they don’t follow through to what they say. We’ve been friends for awhile now, and it maybe because of the whole alpha thing going through your blood, but what you did tonight was really important to me, that you meant what you said.”

He puts the lid back on the ice cream, takes it back to the freezer, and comes to the sink to wash his spoon.  We barley have two inches between us, but I don’t want to move.

“I’ve got your back Brigh.  She should have never said anything about something personal to you.  Even if it was a truth or dare game, you didn’t have to tell us anything that deep, but you did it with guts.  Not everyone can hold on to their firsts like that, let alone let friends and strangers know their stance on it.  I’m honored to be part of that group and it was a privilege to kick out someone trying to belittle you.  Thank you for trusting me,” gracing me with a small smile.

He says it so sincerely that I give him with a playful smile.  “Would you like a gift as a reward for said trust earned?”

He looks confused for a second.  I roll my eyes and sit on the bench.  I turn around and pat the seat next to me.  When he sits down, I push my sketchbook towards him “tada!”

You can see the moment it clicks when he finally gets my joke.  He puts his hand over his heart “Oh my goddess! Is this the infamous art diary?! You’re actually letting me see it?”  I just nod and anxiously await his scrutiny.  He begins to flip the pages ever so slowly, making my heart race.  As if he’s trying to memorize every page.  It’s so quiet, you can only hear the refrigerator running.  I begin getting nervous because he isn’t saying anything.  After what felt like eternity, he lands on the last picture, the one I was working on.

 “Brighton, you’re really good, and not just for some 15 year old either.  I can tell you every species of flower you drew, every location of the landscapes, and even the people you drew. I hope you want to do something with this talent. Not everyone has it.”

I sigh with a blush, and look over at the wolf picture. “Art will always be a part of my life.  I’m not sure if it’ll be a career or hobby, but I’m not going to give it up.”  He smiles at me like he likes my answer.

“Tell me about this picture.  Is it one of your parents’ wolf?”

 “No, I think it’s mine.  I’m not sure but I’ve been drawing her a lot lately and I still have almost a year until it happens,  but it’s probably wishful thinking.  She’s beautiful right?  I know I don’t have the colors on it yet, but I imagine her a dark chocolate brown, the exact shade of espresso with a half a shot of cream in it.  Maybe a shine of red.  Hopefully her eyes are a shade brighter green than what I have…. It’s nice to dream right?”

When I finish my fantasy, I look at him and he’s staring at me.  I get self-conscious and grab for my book.

“Well that’s enough show and tell for tonight.  I’m going to try to get some shut eye.”  I stand and head for the door.  As soon as I reach it, Harris yells to me, “Your dream will come true Brighton, I know it will.”

I look back to him with my heartrate increasing as a small smile forms on my lips.  “Goodnight Harris.” “Night Brigh.”

For the rest of that night/morning, I dream about my wolf and a certain soon-to-be alpha’s smile and how warm and comforting it makes me feel.