Down The Aisle

Chapter 6

Sofia's P.O.V

Today was the day of bailey's operation.

We were going into the hospital

At around 9.00am

Which meant we didn't really need to get up till 8.00

But still, I lay awake, long into the night and early into the morning.

I couldn't see it, but I could sense that Caleb wasn't closing his eyes either.

The thing is, once and only once in their life a man will fall in love, with the perfect girl, and they will be forever

And this love is so strong

But, the first time a man sees his daughter, he will never be the same again. This love is just as strong but it is different, it is more powerful.

When you look into those beautiful little eyes, and see your own reflecting back in them, there is an inseparable bond.

And you realize that there is a whole human life, dependent on you.

It is your job to protect her, to be her shoulder to cry on, to comfort her through thick and thin, to stand by her in sickness and in Health.

And be ready in an instant, to make risks for her, to protect her from everything she needs protecting from

and to even die for her.

Parenting is something people won't understand until you've looked into the eyes of your child.

And it wasn't as though Caleb and I had failed.

We had done everything we could

It's just because this is a hereditary disease.

That means that it is genetic, and through our gene pools.

In the future, I could always see Caleb and I, surrounded by many children.

But if we had another, what is the risk that the baby would also have HME.

Also, what is life gonna be like for Paige.

It would be hard if you had a sister that had a severe illness, let alone your twin.

I just wanted my girls to always know that they are loved equally, and maybe sometimes Bailey may need a bit extra attention, Paige was still always just as important.

"Darlin" Caleb whispered in my ear

"There is no point us sitting in bed worrying our arses of about this all morning, fancy a shower?" he said so soothingly that I instantly gave in to his southern drawl

"Sure, give me five" I said

I heard him get up and head through to the bathroom.

I sighed deeply and sat up

I heard the water turn on in the other room.

Slowly, painfully slowly I pulled myself out of bed and walked into the bathroom.

Caleb was already in the shower and had his back to me

I carefully took of my PJ's and walked over to the shower

I slipped in and moved under the hot water, feeling it run over my back, down my legs.

Caleb's strong arms gripped around me

He softly kissed me on the forehead and reached for the shampoo

He carefully massaged it into my scalp, so gentle and caring

That is the thing with Caleb

There are two kinds off love in a relationship

The passionate s****l love

And the gentle caring love

And Caleb had it all sorted, down to a T

he knew what I needed and when

After I got out the shower I headed through to the girl’s room, wrapped in my towel.

I slowly picked up Bailey in my arms and kissed her softly

She flopped her head on to my shoulder, her tousled blond hair soft against my neck.

"Sailing to dreamland

Across the moonlit bay,

With stars up above you

To guide you on your way

Warm wispy breezes

Will wash your cares away

And gently caress you

Until the break of day"

I sung a gentle lullaby to her

"That was beautiful" Caleb said walking into the room

"My mother use to sing it to me" I smiled weakly

"Common Darlin, I'll bath the girls while you get dressed" he smiled at me.

"Okay" I said weakly as he took a drowsy Bailey of me.

..........................................

About an hour or so later we were already and in the car on the way to the hospital

usually we wouldn't take Paige to the hospital, I didn't think it an appropriate place for my little girl to be.

But as this was Bailey's first operation, I wanted us all to be there, as a family

the usual routine played out, we were already use to it all

We headed up to the 3rd floor

we were going to have a quick meeting with the doctor before they prepped Bailey for surgery.

"hello, Miss Parker, Mr Finn" said doctor Jones to us "and hi there miss Bailey" he grinned at her

Bailey giggled and waved her chubby little hand at the doctor.

"right, if you want to step into my office for a minute"

I walked into his office and sat down on the plush purple chairs near the desk

Bailey on my knee, Paige on Caleb's

"Gosh" smiled the doctor "I can't tell who's who" he smiled at the twins

It was true, they both had blond wisps of fine hair, they had my hazel eyes, and Caleb's nose

The only thing that made them different was there personalities

As Paige was happy to sit there, playing with Caleb's hand and gurgling softly, Bailey would wiggle and wriggle around, fussing and humming.

Paige would smile at things where as Bailey would giggle in a stereotypical baby way.

"Now, Bailey is having the operation on her skull to remove her exostosis, do you have any questions before we begin prep?" he asked

Caleb shook his head

"Quite honestly doctor, the more I know there sicker I'll feel about what's happening to my baby" I said

He nodded at me and gestured towards the door

Caleb took Bailey out of my arms for a minute and held both girls on his lap

"Now, bumble bee, you got to pull through this okay, or else mamma’s gonna have a really hard time" he whispered softly to them

"My girls" he kissed them softly on the head and I took Bailey off him again.

"If you'd like to come with me Miss Parker" said the doctor

I nodded

I held Bailey close in my arms as we walked down the corridor

"you need to put on a gown" Said the doctor passing me a green doctors robe that you see in programmes like Grey's Anatomy

I pulled it on slowly

"now, if you can please change Bailey into this" he said to me passing a much smaller version of the thing I was waring

I gently pulled of Bailey's little dungarees and her flowery top, I pulled on the gown over her diaper

"this way please" a nurse said to me

I looked over to the doctor warily

"Nurse Tawse will show you through, I just need to prep for operating quickly" he smiled encouragingly to me

I nodded and Followed the nurse through to the operating theatre

"Can you put Miss Finn on the table please" said the nurse

I placed Bailey on the table, never fully letting go of her

I hushed Bailey as she started to whimper

"Shhhhh, my baby girl" I said to her softly

"You can stay with her until she becomes unconscious, they you need to go through to the waiting room, a nurse will show you through" Said the nurse

The doctor came through followed by another assistant.

"Ready for the anaesthetic" The doctor asked me

"can I just have a minute please" I said to him

he hesitated, then nodded

I lent down and placed my head next to bailey's

"now bumble bee, whatever fight you got, give it, pull through this okay, Mummy and daddy need you, and Paige most of all, fight it for us as a family, your strong baby girl, Stronger than I’ll ever be" I said

they put the anaesthetic mask over her face and One doctor attached her to a HIV, I heard a gentle beeping.

"one minute Miss Parker" said the doctor

"beep, beep, beep" went the monitor

I sang softly in her ear

"Hush little baby don't say a word,

Mamma’s gonna buy you a mocking Bird

And if that mockingbird won't sing,

mama's gonna buy you a diamond ring

And if that diamond ring turns brass,

mama's gonna buy you a looking glass

And if that looking glass gets broke,

mama's gonna buy you a billy goat

And if that billy goat won't pull,

mama's gonna buy you a cart and bull

And if that cart and bull turn over,

mama's gonna buy you a dog named Rover

And if that dog named Rover won't bark

Papa's gonna buy you a horse and cart

And if that horse and cart fall down,

You'll still be the sweetest little baby in town"

her eyes started to droop and flicker as I blinked back stinging tears

"beep,beep,beep"

"You need to leave now, Miss Parker" said the nurse

but I couldn't get up

My legs wouldn't move

"beep,beep,beep"

I was glued to the spot, holding my little girl

"Miss Parker, you need to leave" I felt a strong grip on my shoulder, I was slowly dragged towards the door

"Don't hurt my baby" I shouted as I was pulled out the room

the last thing I heard was the slow "Beep,Beep,Beep"