Fifty Shades Of Hope

Forgiving Christian

CHRISTIAN'S POV :

Just as we settled in the car Ana's phone rang. She was talking to her assistant, Hannah about a company they are going to buy and they are asking for more money. Greedy Bastards. Ana looks damn sexy in her CEO voice. It f*****g turns me on. Ana said that she will deal with them next week. I was looking at Ana and thinking how much has changed. My chest was swollen with pride as I thought how much my baby has achieved.

Phoebe was fast asleep by the time we pulled up outside the hotel. Ana undid her seat belt and went to pick up Phoebe.

"I can take her." I offer not ready to leave them yet.

"No, it's fine, thank you for today Christian, Phoebe had a lot of fun." Ana smiles as she gets out the car carrying Phoebe asleep against her chest, her head resting on Ana's shoulder.

"It was my pleasure Ana." I smile back as I scramble out of the car after her.

Ana was trying to manage her purse and Phoebe. I laugh at her and she scowls at me. Hell, I have missed this scowling too. I went and took Phoebe in my arms. She find her equilibrium and blushed before saying me thank you.

We enter the hotel and Ana calls the elevator. She asks the room service to bring an extra sheet of blanket. Soon enough thee is an knock on the door and the i***t college boy nods profusely as Ana hands him money, and I notice he's looking at Ana. Fucker. I take her hand declaring her mine and shut the door in front of him. Don't people understand that she is with a little girl and a man. She is taken.

"Christian can you lay Phoebe in the bed and cover her with the blanket? I have to change it won't take much time." I am happy as I am doing something for my daughter. It looks like we are a happy family and I have always been a part of it. I nod my head smiling at her. God she is gorgeous. Her chestnut hair slipping on her shoulder looks awesome.

I tuck Phoebe in bed and sit beside her. As I wait for Ana, I notice Phoebe's face and brush some hair from her face. She has beautiful pale skin and grey eyes like me and her brunette with light copper mixed coloured hair flowing down to the middle of her back in waves. I wish she never cuts them. She is a princess. My princess. My daughter. Ana and I. Our daughter.

I do not realize when Ana comes back. She is wearing a sexy nighty and has made a bun. My c**k twitches in response. She observes me as if she is reading in between the line. We sit in an uncomfortable silence not knowing what to speak.

"So what do you want Christian?" Ana asks me as she sits in the sofa. I shut Phoebe's door silently so she is not disturbed. I do not want her to have nightmares. Ever. I slowly lower myself beside her leaving a decent amount of space between us. I'm watching her however she is staring off at space and looks at me. It is now or never Grey.

"Ana I want Phoebe and you in my life. I know I was a d**k and did not do right. I should have trusted you but I am sorry Ana. I was wrong, okay. I admit it. I was wrong and made a mistake. Please let me in. Today spending time with Phoebe and you I know one thing for sure. I want our daughter, I want that little girl sleeping in that room, I want her to hug and kiss me like she did today. I want to see her face light up when she sees me. I don't want to miss another minute of her life. I also want you. I know what is to be neglected by your mother and I want that she sees us as a family. Happy one. I want her to get love from both her parents. I want to be the one kissing your beautiful body, I want to be the one you think of as you fall asleep, the one you make love to, I want us. I want our family." I sigh as I feel my d**k jumps at the thought of her in my bed. Down boy, I know you want to be inside the warm p***y but not now. I adjust my pants discreetly.

She looks at me unimpressed and disbelievingly.

"Really? Just like that, you think all you need to say is I'm sorry to take away four years of anger and pain. If you think that you are wrong. Old Ana might have done that but I am not her. I have a identity and I know what is wrong and right for me."

She closes her eyes as if choosing her words very carefully.

" If you want to have a relationship with Phoebe, I have no problem in it. I have seen the admiration and love in your eyes for her Christian. I know you won't hurt her and I do know what is to be loved by a single parent."

She closes her eyes and wait to catch her breath. I know it is difficult for her.

"I cried myself to sleep for months. You don't get to do this, you can't fix this with a few words." She whispers and I can hear the pain in her words. It is as if she is lost in her own world.

"I know, Ana. Believe me I know." She gives me an icy glare and raise a brow at me. I know that look. s**t. It does not mean anything good.

" Please look at me once Ana, please." I beg her to show me those blue eyes which I dream of. Those blue eyes which chases me.

She finally turns to face me but her eyes do not show the glimmer, they are showing me nothing but sadness. It breaks my heart to see her in such state. I never wanted the glimmer of her eyes to be gone. Not even when I thought she had cheated on me. She points a finger at me.

"Over the years there has been so much I wanted to say to you, to yell at you about and now that you're here, I have nothing. You gave up on us, not me."

I go on my knees and kneel beside her. I take her hand and kiss her fingers. She seems startled but does not stop me. I look in her eyes though she is trying to not look at me I continue to look in them. I know that pair of eyes very well.

"I am so f*****g sorry, Ana, I never wanted any of this to happen. Please let me once show how sorry I am. Please. I want to take care of you, cherish you, love you. Please, forgive me. You were the one who said mistakes happen and they do to make us better persons. Please let me be a better person. Let me figure everything with you and our daughter." She stands and starts to pace.

" Why do you have to do this? Huh, say words like this. Why? Why do you have to always melt my heart? Why? What is wrong with me?" She yells at me. She starts shaking and tears start flowing from her eyes. I go near her and pull her into me, wrapping my arms around her letting her cry into my shirt. It feels good to have her in my arms again evens if it's just for a minute.

I talk softly in her ear.

"Shh. Hush baby, I know I am terrible. Please don't cry. You know I hate seeing you cry. I am sorry please don't cry. Shh. You are my Ana. My strong Ana. You know that right do not forget it." I pick her up and carry her in another room. I make sure she is laying on the bed. I bring a glass of water and hand it to her. I pull my girl into my lap and soothe her.

" Here drink it. You will feel better." She takes the glass and drink water. She gives me it back and I keep it on the table. She stops crying but does not take her head from my chest. I bury my nose in her hair. She smells of apples and vanilla. I want to keep it with me forever. After some time she speaks.

" I forgive you Christian. I told you that at the meeting. I have no vile intentions against you." She says while playing with my chest. I brush her hair. I want to hold her like this. I do not want this moment to end. Forever.

" This is not easy for me Christian but I do not want to dwell in the past. I know what is to lose someone close to your heart and never getting a chance to talk to them. I do not want such thing for us. I know what it is to die or be on the verge of facing death." I am glad to hear her words and give her my megawatt smile. I repeatedly kiss her hair. As I am trying to understand her thoughts. I gasp.

" What do you mean by you know what is it to die or be on verge of it?" I ask her as I am getting livid. What did happen to my Ana? What have I missed? Why did nobody inform me? It is like you would have listened to them, Grey.

Ana turns her back to me and I see her right shoulder. I am horrified would be an understatement. I feel woeful.

A. f*****g. Gunshot.

Who could have hurt my baby? I am not going to let the fucker go easily. He is going to pay for his mistake.

"Who did this to you Ana?" I ask her but find her crying. I turn her face towards me and hold her chin so she is looking directly at me.

"Answer me, baby. I am here for you, do not be afraid, please answer me. Who did this to you Ana? Just once tell me I am going to make the fucker pay for your pain." She buries her face in my chest and cries. I hold her and try to calm her. She said she was on the verge of death. That means I could have lost her. No. I cannot live without her.

" Ethan Kavanagha" She says but her voice is barely a whisper. I'm f*****g livid and seeing red. How dare that fucker hurt her. My baby. I am going to ruin his life for hurting my sweet, lovely Ana.

" Why?" I am so f*****g furious. I am going to kill that fucker with my bare hands. Did Taylor knew about this? Why the f**k he not tell me about this? That fucker was all near my sister.

Oh. My. God.

Did he harm Mia also? If he laid a single hand on my sister I am going to make sure he will beg for mercy.

"Did Taylor know about this? When did this happen? Why did he do that?" I ask Ana while wiping tears off her face as new ones take their place.

"Hey calm down please. Do not cry baby. I am going to ruin his life. Please. Everything will be okay." I wipe her face and she closes her eyes. I look at her face and all I see is pain over her face.

" Can we talk about this later? Please Christian I am tired. I just want you to hold me." I see a pleading look on her face and I know it is not easy to open up. I reluctantly agree to her.

We lie on the bed and spoon each other. I am stroking her hair as it calms me.

" Sleep my sweet Ana. My baby." I make sure that the duvet cover us both. Her breathing changes soon and I know she is out.

I am not going to let anyone hurt my Ana more. She has suffered a lot and nobody will make her cry. It was f*****g breaking me to see her cry. It was like she has no control over her and tears were falling from her eyes. I know this I cried the same way when I was being used an ashtray.

I kiss her forehead and hold her. I am going to protect her and Phoebe from any danger coming. I am going to f*****g lay my life in a heartbeat if required.