Alpha Zanthus

Chapter 4

When I woke up, I found myself still lying on Zanthus' hardwood floor.

It was pitch black in the room - and the cabin itself, which proved my suspicions of Zanthus not being back yet. And I still couldn't understand why he was so angry with me...

Rubbing my forehead, I sat up. And I still ached; which wasn't a good sign. The bright red letters of Zanthus' alarm clock read '12:18', so that meant that I was officially 18. An adult. The age for marking. The time where I shouldn't of felt like death. But there I laid, feeling no better than I did yesterday.

I struggled to push myself up into a standing position. My legs were wobbly and my head was heavy. I ended up having to grip onto Zanthus' bedside table to pull myself up. But even then, it helped me very little.

The bottom of my feet hurt as I walked across the hardwood floors - it felt as if the floors were made of pins and needles, piercing my feet with every step I took. And my vision was extremely blurry; making it even more of a challenge to get around in the dark, even with my enhanced night vision.

I wrapped an arm around my aching stomach as I tromped down the halls, and I used my free hand to move along the walls, somewhat steadying myself. But the room spun, and I ended up having to stop numerous times; not only to attempt to catch my bearings, but also to try and not deplete all my energy. I felt terminally ill.

Eventually, I stumbled across the room I was looking for - Zanthus' bathroom. The white toilet was clearly visible with the door open, and I wasted no time in rushing to it.

I fell to my knees in front of the toilet, white-knuckling the edges of the seat. I could feel as the vomit trailed its way up my throat, and shot out from my mouth. But, unlike last time, I vomited for at least two minutes. My vomit tainted the once clear toilet water, turning it black. Disgusted, and not wanting to continue to see the extremity of my illness, I flushed the toilet.

Grabbing onto the sink, it took a herculean strength to push myself into a standing position again. I hobbled my way to the light switch, blindly flipping it on. The brightness of the light caught me off guard, and I quickly threw my arm over my eyes, trying to shelter them from the blinding bulbs.

Even then, after I thought I was readjusted to the lights, it still hurt to have my eyes open. It felt as if I had been smoked in the head with a sledgehammer. And that...that was when I knew something was definitely not right...it was well in the field of being beyond amiss.

I clenched my hands against the bathroom sink, before turning on the cold water and splashing it onto my face. I was tired, and wanted to wake myself up. But instead of waking myself up, I stung my face.

I dreaded looking in the mirror, but I knew I had to at some point; to literally face the damage. And sure enough, damaged I looked.

My already fair skin was impossibly paler than usual, giving me the illusion of being a ghost. Vibrant purple and blue eye bags resided underneath my eyes. My lips were pale and cracked, as if my lips had never met lip chap. My eyes were red and bloodshot, making it look as if I hadn't slept in months, and did drugs regularly. My neck had a gnarly, swollen bruise where the mark was; dark blue, purple, green, and yellow reminded me of the choice that was taken away from me. But I still didn't find that the worst part...my face was slimmer than usual, making my high cheekbones unattractively more prominent. I looked horrible; only the shell of the person I used to be.

And my stench was horrible...I reeked of sweat and rejection - rejection being my body not responding well to the mark. It oozed out of my pores; the foul, sour scent.

My clothing stuck tightly to my skin - glued there by my sweat. With shaky hands, I peeled my shirt away from my sticky torso, and removed it, letting it fall to the floor. I struggled to remove the rest of my clothing, because of how tired I was and how wet the clothing was. But eventually I stripped down until I was naked, preparing to shower my stench away, and maybe soothe the pain with some hot water.

Carefully stepping into the shower, I wasted no time in turning it on, making the water as hot as I could tolerate without burning my skin off. I sighed softly, letting the warm water run down my body. It numbed the pain for a few seconds.

A sudden sharp pain jolted in my stomach, and I gasped as I hunched over in the shower, rendered breathless by the ferocity of the pain. It was crippling...

Another pain shot through my stomach, far more painful than the first. Black spots clouded my vision, and my knees felt weak to the point where they actually gave out from underneath me. I grabbed onto the shower curtain as I fell out of the shower, onto Zanthus' bathroom floor. My head painfully smacked against the tiles, and I laid there; immobile.

The sound of bones popping snapped me out of my stupor. My body was taking too much pain...so my body was trying to protect itself by shifting into my wolf.

And there I laid there, on the ground, in my wolf form, wounded. My tongue hung out of the side of my mouth, and my dark, furry body was coated in sweat. Even in my wolf form, the pain wasn't at all lenient. I laid there, whining and whimpering. I even softly howled a few times.

I shifted back into my human form, not even on my own accord. My body was pretty much malfunctioning...like a dying light that couldn't decide if it wanted to stay on or off. I had no control over my shifting like I usually did, and soon enough I found myself uncontrollably shifting back into my wolf form.

I heard the door slam from downstairs, and I knew it was Zanthus. I tried to howl, but my throat was raw and scratchy, and no sound escaped my mouth. I started whining, not wanting to die on the bathroom floor. I tried clawing my paws against the floor, loudly scraping my long nails against the tiles. But even then it wasn't enough.

I shifted back into my human form, once again not even on my own accord. And I knew that was my chance to scream for his help. Even though my throat burned, I would push the pain aside. I preferred staying alive.

"Zanthus!" I croaked, just loud enough to hear over the running water of the shower that was still on. I sucked in a sharp breath. "Zanthus!" I finally screamed at the top of my lungs, voice shrill and panicked. "Zanthus, Zanthus, Zanthus!" I screamed over and over again, until I heard his heavy footsteps running up the stairs. I didn't care that I was laying on his bathroom floor, wet and naked. Many had seen me naked, and I had seen many naked. Nudity wasn't something unusual or uncomfortable in the werewolf community.

I laid on the ground, curled in the fetal position as Zanthus barged into the room. My breaths were heavy and laboured, and my dark, soaked curls clung to my face.

Zanthus threw himself beside me, rolling me onto my back, exposing everything to him. I should've felt insecure or vulnerable, knowing that my naked breasts and my forbidden area were on display for him...but I couldn't bring myself to...

I could hear Zanthus screaming my name over and over again. For the first time since I met him, he seemed concerned and panicked about me, and what I was facing. He shook my shoulders violently with one hand, and lightly slapped my cheek repeatedly with the other. The slaps weren't enough to really hurt, but they were enough to slightly sting; constantly reminding me that I was alive. I finally opened my eyes, looking up.

But instead of meeting Zanthus' burnt gold eyes, I met my mothers green ones. The same flecks of gold, orange, brown, and darker green speckled her eyes, such as they did mine. It was if I was looking into my own eyes. My mother smiled at me.

And I smiled back, letting my body shut down to the vision of her face.

~

For the first time ever, I had vividly seen my mother. It wasn't old videos or pictures; it was freshly made in my dream. It was eerie how much I looked like her. The same dark chocolate curls, the porcelain skin, and the green eyes. The only differences I could really spot was the fact that she had a rounder tip to her nose, and her lips weren't as full as mine. But she was still so beautiful...and I didn't want to wake up. I wanted to meet her.

She told me it wasn't my time.

And slowly, she faded away from me, until I was met with blackness. I didn't like the blackness...it reminded me of how helpless I felt earlier. How Zanthus had just left me there to fend for myself.

I felt like a revenant, waking up. My eyes were heavy and sore, and they were blurry for a bit, until I managed to refocus my vision. I looked around, panicked when I didn't recognize the dreary room. The blue was too pale to be considered warm or comforting...

I shot up, yelping when I felt a few tugs on my wrists. Looking at them, I noticed the needles stuck in them. Dazed and confused, I started trying to rip them out of my wrists, only to hear shouting. It was a nurse. I was in the pack hospital.

"Good to see you're awake, Luna, but I have to request you to calm down." The nurse said, voice soft and calm as she approached me. I looked at her wide-eyed, still trying to get my bearings. She offered me a small smile, placing a hand on my racing heart as she pushed me back to lay down. I didn't fight her; I only tried to relax myself.

"Hi," I breathed out, surprised my throat didn't ache like it had earlier. In fact, I didn't feel as ill as I did earlier. I felt pretty decent, actually. "How did I get here?" I questioned, clearing my throat.

"Oh! Alpha Zanthus brought you here. He said he found you unconscious on the bathroom floor," she readjusted her glasses, checking the needles in my wrists, making sure they were okay. "It's a good thing he found you and brought you in when he did. You most likely would've been dead in a half an hour." She told me.

I ran a hand through my hair. "I guess it is," I agreed, chuckling softly. "is he here?" I questioned. She nodded, sending me a small smile, exposing deep dimples. I couldn't help but smile back at her - her smile lit up the dull room.

"He is, would you like me to bring him in?" She asked, raising an orange brow. Her hazel green eyes were bright with knowingness. She knew I wanted to see Zanthus, so I nodded. "Of course, Luna." She bowed her head, and left to retrieve Zanthus.

I took a deep breath, nervous to see Zanthus. He had seen me in such an ugly state...

Moments later, Zanthus walked into the room; a cup of ice water in his hand. I gave him a grateful smile when he handed it to me; and I greedily drank it as Zanthus sat down on the edge of the bed. His large size weighed down the bed on his side, and I flopped against him. We both stiffened, and I instantly scooted a bit away from him, feeling embarrassed.

Once I was done with the cup, Zanthus grabbed it from me and tossed it carelessly into the trash. I offered him another grateful smile. "Thanks for...bringing me in." I awkwardly thanked him, peeking at him through my long, dark eyelashes. He nodded, before saying something that completely took me off guard.

"You scared me, Olive. Seeing you on the floor...in that much pain-" he stopped mid sentence, jaw clenching as he looked everywhere except where I was. "I never want to see that again." He gritted out.

Finding myself unable to respond, I looked at the side of his face. It meant a lot - those words did, but I also found them somewhat meaningless... Because he, himself, had inflicted pain on me before.

So I settled on resting my small hand on his large, muscled forearm instead. His golden eyes snapped to mine, wide from the shock of my actions. Heck, I was shocked too. But I hid it well.

"Thank you." I whispered, deciding to focus on the good. All he did was give me another nod. A peaceful silence fell over us, louder than any words we could've spoken.

Moments later, the same nurse knocked on the door, peeping her head inside. Once she knew it was clear, she slowly walked in. "Alpha," she greeted, bowing her head at Zanthus, showing her respect. "Luna," she greeted, repeating the respectful bow. "The doctor says the Luna may be dismissed, if she feels she's well enough to go home." She looked at me in question, wanting me to give her an answer.

"Yes, she's ready." Zanthus cut in, answering for me. The nurse gave me a weary look, which earned a growl from Zanthus. Not only was she questioning me, she was questioning him. It was considered disrespectful and challenging. And I quickly nodded my agreement, not wanting to see her get hurt.

"Okay," she said, approaching the opposite side of the bed that Zanthus was on. "I just need to remove these IV's from your wrists..." She thought out loud, removing the needles from my wrists. "There. Now, would you like a wheelchair?" She asked.

I gave her a weary look, not too fond of the idea. "No, thank you. I think I'll try to walk." I told her, moving around. Zanthus stood up off of the bed, keeping a hand on my bicep. His grip was hard...bruising, and his nails dug into my flesh. However, I didn't complain, because I knew he was unaware of his own strength.

The moment I was standing, my body crumpled. I whimpered, disappointed in how fatigued my body was. Zanthus caught me, however, by wrapping his arms around my waist. I latched onto his shirt, trying to sturdy myself.

"I'll get you a wheelchair." The nurse told me. I frowned, but didn't argue. However, Zanthus wasn't so easy to agree.

"No," he growled. The nurse froze mid step, turning around to face him. "I'll carry her." He told her, before sweeping me into his large arms for the second time, pinning me to his chest. The nurse looked uncomfortable, but nodded, scurrying out of the room. But I understood, because I felt uncomfortable, too.

Wordlessly, Zanthus carried me out of the room. I buried my face in his chest as he walked down the hall, not liking the feeling of the scrutiny we - I was receiving from the pack members. Then again, it wasn't everyday you seen your Alpha carrying your Luna who's wearing a large hospital gown... through a hospital. But Zanthus scared their stares away by growling lowly in warning. For the first time I wasn't completely and utterly terrified of Zanthus...

In fact, I felt protected and calm.