Remember Me

Chapter 1- Visitor

I had my eyes on her all night.

Well mostly her breasts, but still her. When she finally caught me staring I saw that grin transform into a flirty smile like all of them do. She walked over to me with poise, making me watch the way her skinny waste went from side to side. She took my hand and led me to one of the bedrooms, not even bothering to say a word.

Now I sat up in bed, watching the girl beside me sleep. From what I heard she had been a virgin, but if it was truth or not, she wasn't now. I looked over her with disgust, truly hating myself for what I am, but this was who I am. It wasn't something I could change.

If you had to watch someone die, I would feel sorry for you. I would never wish that fate on anyone. Not even my own enemies. Seeing someone you love die, maybe in your owns arms, leaves a mark that can't be erased. You would stay up all night and feel sorry that you couldn't have done anything.

But what if you were the reason that person died. that's just something cruel that nobody should have to shoulder, but I did and I still do. I have to live with the fact that I caused my own mothers death by trying to escape death myself. You see I killed my mother, Claire, but I promise I didn't mean to. It was an accident and I was only a baby for Pete's sake. But after a few days of life I was able to understand what I had done.

We buried my mother where I said my final goodbye. I knew I loved her even though I never knew her, but to see the look on my father's face every time he looked at me…god I wish I could just crawly under a rock every time he got close. Not that he blames me, but I blame myself. A little too much really.

So this is how I got to be like this. A man w***e I mean. It's the only way I could keep my mind off Claire. I can't stand the guilt that haunts me every second.

Its been like this every since my tenth birthday. I grew up like normal, always asking for stories of my mother, and then seeing Jason transform as he spoke of her. I knew he loved her. But after a while the guilt started to eat at me. To hear of how wonderful Claire was and to know that I had killed her. I just couldn't take it. So then everyone in the house knew better than to mention her when I was around, or I would get mad. Really mad.

So Jason and I drifted apart, never really talking because I was never really home anyway. I was always at a girls house or something. When ever we do speak, we usually fight, but on our rare moments we talk like a father and son should, but those talks come about once a year. Maybe not even that regularly.

He wasn't proud of me, that was a given, but I tried. I tried to stop being who I was, sometimes I ran away, but I could never hide from who I became. I could make it a week without a girl, but I would c***k after that.

It wasn't just dad who was disappointed in me. I knew Claire was, where she was. In heaven I was guessing. I knew she watched me, wondering if I was a mistake. I was sure she didn't love me, no matter how many times dad said that she did, I just refused to believe him. But my other family was disappointed in me.

Skylar, Taylor, Ben, Syd, Angel, Nick, and I knew Cody and Trevor wasn't on my side even though they went to live with Sylvia's clan after Jason finally turned Trevor into a vampire. They each found mates, there so it all worked out, but they came by once in a while.

I liked them all, don't get me wrong, but it was hard to look at them. To see each face, sad in the choices I was making, and then for them to see my blue eyes (Claire's eyes) and for them to see her in me. It made me feel bad. Who was I to take such a perfect life away from them. I bet they all resented me.

Then came the Cullens. You had Carlisle, Esme, Jasper, Alice, Emmett (my favorite), Rosalie, Edward, Bella, and Renesmee. They came around once and a while. I got along with Edward just fine until Skylar told me the story about how Edward killed Sierra and then Claire vowed to kill him. Since Claire hated him, I will too.

So every time he came around, I would glare, ignore, growl, and pretty much be a total snob to. But other than him I liked the Cullens. Alice was fun to be around, Jasper and Emmett were something from another planet, Rosalie was hot, Renesmee was awesome, and Bella was cool. The doctor and his wife is nice too, but he knew Claire first. It was harder to look into his eyes than the rest because he was just so gentle all the time.

Next was the wolf pack, which pretty much was family with the Cullens. Jacob Black was always around Renesmee since they were in love, and so was the rest of his pack. I liked them the best. It was easier to be around someone of my own kind. They trusted me and were my family, even though I haven't ever phased. Jason doesn't understand why, but he thinks it will just come in time. I just have to get really angry first. Yeah that was twenty years ago when he said that.

Then I had my friends at School. There was Liam Hart who was my very best friend, and his girlfriend Chelly Dublin. I had Tony Heinz, Rachael Snap, and my current girlfriend for the week, Brooke McGraw. I had a lot of friends at my new school Kenton Ridge, but these were my closest. Jason liked Liam the best because he was a good influence on me, but I liked him most because he didn't judge me for who I am. He just liked me from the get go.

We moved her to Springfield, Ohio a few months ago, starting over in a new town like always and I already had a rep here just like my other schools. I wasn't really proud of it, but as long as girls kept throwing themselves at me, I was ok with it. For now anyway.

So here I was, doing the same thing again. I looked at the clock and saw that it was already seven in the morning. I put on my clothes and left the girl alone in the room. A one night stand wasn't irregular for me. I did it all the time.

I walked out of the house and saw trash everywhere. People walked sideways in a hangover, some were trashed, and some kids didn't even bother to get a room to do all this stuff. Gross. Like we want to see that stuff.

I got in my car and pulled out onto the main road, Middle Urbana I think, and drove quickly to our house out in the country. It only took a quick minute until I was pulling into the driveway and stepping out of the car. Lights were on, as usual, but they weren't for me. They never slept so the lights were never off. I locked my silver Audi R8 and opened the door.

The living room was empty, but I heard some people in the kitchen so I walked in there, throwing my keys on the hook. They looked at me as I walked by and got some food. Dad was already wolfing down Nachos (yes I get the pun) while the others just watched him with a look of disgust.

"Hey, Jonathan." Nick said, sitting next to Angel, holding her hand. I nodded back and grabbed a bowl of cereal.

"How was your night?"

I looked at my dad when he spoke. It didn't amaze me that when I did I felt like I was looking in a mirror. Besides the eyes we were perfect twins here, right down to the last freckle and mole. Same height, same smile, same speed and same strength.

I debated on how to answer. But they already knew what I was up to every night so it was pointless to lie to him. "It was alright I guess, nothing special." he frowned and went back to eating. I heard a snicker or two from Skylar and a slap, probably from Syd, but other than that it was dead silence.

I chewed quietly, pretty much hoping I could just disappear. Most of them didn't want me here anyway. Jason hates me and I bet Claire does too. Life just sucks.

"She doesn't hate you." Syd said sympathetically, putting her hand over mine. I forgot about Syd reading minds for a moment. Normally she's just so quite I forget about her gifts. "Nobody does, not even Jason."

I snorted. Jason looked at me with a pained look on his face. "I don't blame you, Jonathan. I never did and I never will. Its Cody's fault, we both know that."

He was right. This was one of our rare moments where we could talk to each other without yelling, but he was still right. Cody turned my mom human, and Claire conceived me. Then when she was giving birth, Cody couldn't hold on to his little magic gift and she was turning into a vampire. I was going to die, but like Nessie, I tried to bite my way out and I did, thus killing my mother. And it was Cody's fault, but Jason was never able to find him because he ran off before I was completely out.

"Sure, Jason." I said, coldly.

"Jonathan…" he tried again.

"Enough! Can't I just eat in silence?"

He shut up and so did everybody else. I felt bad about saying that, but they knew my rule. I didn't talk about Claire and I never will. I didn't want to. Final answer. Set in stone. Move the heck on.

I finished my make shift break fast and put the bowl in the sink. I washed it and put it away. I turned around to see them watching me, clearly not talking while I was in here.

"So what are we doing tonight?" I asked, leaning on the counter behind me.

"Your not going out with Brooke?" Taylor said in her normal icy tone when it came to talking about the girls I used, but I didn't care what she thought.

"I did last night. She's pissed at me anyway so what's the point?"

"Another girl mad at Jonathan? Shocker." Skylar mocked.

I ignored his jibe and looked back my father. "Jason?"

Since Claire was gone Jason took over the role of the leader. It seemed only fitting, but its not like he really wanted to. I bet if he had a choice he would trade me for Claire.

"Jonathan…"

"Get out of my head!" I shouted, making her wince. I felt my body tremble. It looked like I was vibrating. Jason watched me with sudden interest while everyone backed out of the way. I felt the anger course through me, but like normal I felt an awkwardness to it. It was like my body was being pulled into several directions, each wanting to go somewhere else.

Jason pat my shoulder. "Maybe next time."

"You realize you've been saying that for the last like twenty years?"

He smiled as I teased. Two in one night? This is kind of cool. "Yeah, but maybe I'll be right next time."

"What ever you say, dad."

It still brought a smile to his lips when I called him dad. I guess it must be some joy to be known as a father, but I would love to say mom sometime, but that was never going to happen unless I visit her grave, which I do sometimes.

"Anyway, what are we doing?"

Jason looked away. "Edward and Bella are coming over." he said quickly, almost like he hoped I wouldn't hear.

But I did.

I growled loudly, feeling my body shake again, but it died away much faster knowing I had no hope of actually phasing. Maybe I wouldn't. but it didn't matter. I wanted to rip Edward into shreds.

Syd laughed and then looked down when we all glanced at her.

There was a knock on the door. I half expected it to be Edward so I tensed and got ready for, well anything. Maybe we could fight…no. Bella was there. She wouldn't let us even if he wanted to.

But when the door opened I saw someone completely different.

The figure had blonde, shaggy hair. He was shorter than me, but most people were. He wore nice clothes and looked like a model. He wasn't smiling, but I could feel his confident mood.

Jason and I exchanged a quick nod and then we both lunged at Cody Evans.