a lifetime's hate and three lifetimes' love

fourteen

The semester finals were a week away. Even the most laid back were starting to feel the tension. This was the time when Appie would be shopping for exam guides, alongside the others. At least, that was how it was the last four semesters. This semester was different. When the topic of the guides came up, she felt weird. Because she had been studying every day with Bee, she suddenly didn’t understand the point of a guide. And then, she realised once again, just how deeply she was affected by Bee. How much she had changed.

And then, Nina brought to Appie a whole other discussion.

“They’re all planning a trip in the holidays. After the exams. And I was chosen to bring it up with you. You are coming, aren’t you?”

Appie was confused. “What do you mean?” She asked.

“What do I mean what exactly?” Nina asked. “You’ve been weird, recently. That’s not me. Everyone’s got the same words in their mouths. See, everyone feels the same. But we’re not complaining. At least, not every one of us. You want to be better. Good for you. But it’s the holidays after the exams. Three weeks. We’re only planning a trip for a week. It’s something we talked about. We wanted to make it happen after the previous four semesters. We couldn’t. Now, we want to. And since the plan was for all of us to go together, all of us want you to come along.”

“Okay. I will. Of course I will. Why would you think I would say no to a holiday trip? You’re the one being weird now.”

“You know that’s not what we’re talking about.”

“Bee?” Appie said, after a pause.

“Yeah,” Nina said. Nodded. “Bee. We can invite him. Will he come?”

“I don’t know.”

“Come one. You know him so well. What do you think?”

“I think he won’t.” Appie didn’t want to admit it. But it was true. She knew he wouldn’t. At least, he wouldn’t want to. If she asked, he would say okay. And he would come. But that wouldn’t be what he wanted.

“So, can you come without him?” Nina asked. “Or is that too much to ask? Now that you have a boyfriend, you can’t go anywhere without him?”

Appie didn’t reply.

“Whatever,” Nina said. She was irritated. And the anger was starting to show. She didn’t want to start another fight with Appie. “Take your time. Have a discussion with your boyfriend. Decide. Tell us.”

“I’ll tell you by tomorrow.”

Nina got the answer. And she left.

That afternoon, in the library, there was something to discuss before they started studying.

“We need to talk about something,” Appie said.

“Sure,” Bee said. “What is it?”

Appie took a deep breath. And looked at the two girls sitting at the table next to theirs. She knew they were listening. They probably already knew what the something was.

“Nina told me they were planning a trip for the holidays. After the exams. Before the next semester starts. It’s a trip we planned for in every one of the last four semesters. Never did happen. For whatever reasons. This time, they are hellbent on making it happen.”

“And you want to go,” Bee said.

“I do,” Appie admitted. “I also want you to come.”

“It’s because of me, isn’t it?” Bee asked.

Appie didn’t need to answer.

“Of course it is,” El answered instead.

El and Emma had come over, and were sitting at the same table.

“If you’re both going, then we’re coming along too,” El said.

“We are?” Emma asked El.

“Yes,” El said. “If he is going.”

“You’re obsessed with him,” Appie said.

“I must protect you,” El said.

After the lunch with Appie’s mother, they had shed all pretences. It was mostly El and Appie who found no reason to dance around the bush. At least when it was just them, they spoke their minds without filter.

“What are you worried about?” Appie asked.

“That you’ll get intimate, physically,” El said.

“Not before marriage,” Appie said. “We’re saving ourselves.”

El burst out laughing. “You, maybe. Him? No way.”

“Yes way,” Appie said. “And it is no concern of yours.”

“Whatever. I said it. If he’s going, we’re coming too.”

“Are you?” Appie asked Bee.

“If I don’t?” Bee asked.

“Then I don’t want to go either,” Appie said. “But I really, really want to go.” She was hugging his arm, her chin rested on his shoulder.

“Fine,” Bee said, admitting defeat without hesitation. “We’ll go.”

“We’re coming too,” El said.

El pushed Appie away from Bee.

Appie glared at El. Grinned at Bee. And reached for her phone.

“I’ll tell Nina.”

After Appie’s phone call to Nina, they got back to studying.

-

The trip was Abe’s idea. He suggested it first. Milly agreed immediately. And she had just the words to convince Nina and Sophie.

“We can finally spend time away from college,” Milly said. “Just by ourselves. And bury the hatchet. It’ll be good for all of us. I’ll convince my parents. And come on, if I can convince my parents, you can all convince your parents too. And because we’ll be together as a group, we’ll be fine. Safe. We’ll look after each other.”

Nina was convinced. And she knew how to convince Sophie and the rest.

“Milly is right,” Nina said. “It will be just us. We can show Appie that Bee doesn’t fit in with our group. He’s not one of us. She is. Maybe we can get her to get over this phase.”

Sophie was convinced. The truth was that Sophie wanted to go. She was just unsure about how to bring it up at home. A little convincing was all she needed.

“You’ll help me at home,” Sophie said to Nina.

“Sure,” Nina agreed readily. “I’ll talk to Appie too.”

Nina convinced Appie. And Appie brought along two more than expected. Bee, was no surprise. El and Emma were a bit of a surprise.

On Abe’s side, it was easy. He brought up the trip. And the boys were all in. There were eight of them.

In all, it turned out to be a group of fourteen. And they couldn’t wait for the start of the holidays. They were all so excited, not even the exams could bring them down.

Among the eight boys, was Roman. And Roman had a crush on Appie since forever. And that was no secret. Pretty much everyone knew. And pretty much anyone could see it. The moment Roman saw Appie, he would blush. When he was near her, he would grin. And he would turn silly in her company.

In fact, Roman had even confessed. At the end of the first semester of the first year. After the last exam. They were all going to a restaurant to celebrate over lunch. Roman sat next to Appie at the restaurant. And while they waited for the food, he turned toward her, and expressed his heart.

“Appellonia, I want to tell you something. I like you. I’ve liked you since the day I saw you. The first day of college. I couldn’t look away. I’ve been looking at you since then. And I realised in a few days that I have fallen for you. Will you accept me?”

They were too many for one table. Three tables were pushed together to seat the lot of them. Appie and Roman were at one end. And Roman was loud and clear, enough for those at the other end to hear it all too. And so, silence descended upon the party. Everyone was waiting for Appie’s reply.

And reply Appie did. Without any hesitation.

“I’m sorry, Roman. I don’t like you like that. I cannot accept you.”

Roman was disappointed. But not defeated. He wasn’t heartbroken. He wasn’t going to give up. He never gave up on his pursuit.

And so, Roman was the most affected by Appie’s growing closeness with Bee.

The boys had all been supportive of his affection. They made up opportunities for Roman to be next to Appie. And they weren’t ready to give up either. They were all still on Roman’s side, even now.

Roman was in for a surprise when Nina agreed to help him too.

“I think you are better,” Nina said to him. “And if it is inevitable, then I’d rather it was you. Much better than Bee.”

Roman was delighted.

Sophie stood by Nina’s side. Her silence being her acquiescence.

The trip that was supposed to be about relaxing and having fun was turning into a matchmaking session, with everyone pouring in ideas about how to keep Appie away from Bee and bring Appie and Roman together.

Roman definitely wasn’t complaining. In fact, he couldn’t stop grinning.

-

“Explain to me again, why are we going?” Emma asked.

“Because I know what might happen, if Appie and Bee are together, by themselves, outside of college,” El said with certainty.

“Right,” Emma said. “Because that was how you were. With him.”

“A different lifetime,” El said.

“Not much different this time around. Except that you aren’t together. You can’t keep your eyes off of him. And maybe, if you two were by yourselves, you cannot keep away from him. Maybe that’s what this is. What you’re seeing.”

“You don’t have to be so smug. You aren’t that smart.”

The two friends glared at each other. And then burst out laughing.

“Seriously,” Emma said, again. “Why are we going?”

“I want to say it’s because of Appie,” El said honestly. “And I want it to be true. But, I don’t know. I really don’t know anymore.”

“That’s okay,” Emma said. “We’ll take this opportunity to figure it out. What’s going on in that head of yours.”

“Do you know where we’re going?” El asked.

El was only concerned about Bee going, and Appie going. She didn’t care about the where. And she was only asking about that now, two days later.

In the previous lifetime, there wasn’t such a trip. The first time El went anywhere with Bee was a year after college. When she flew over to see him.

Why was it so different in this lifetime? Why was he so different? What was going on?

“Honey, I’m worried now,” Emma said. “What will you do without me, if you’re so lost?”

“You’ll just have to stay with me,” El said.

“I guess I don’t have a choice,” Emma said. “Our first holiday trip. Let’s make it the best.”

-

Appie didn’t keep secrets from her parents. And so, she had spoken about wanting to go on a trip with just friends many times. And every time, even though her parents didn’t say no, they didn’t say yes either. And Appie understood. They were worried that something might happen.

“They’re serious this time,” Appie said.

The family of three was having dinner at the table. It was not an everyday thing. A lot of times, when work kept one of them at office, they made do. But when they were all home, and when there was something on their minds, something they wanted to talk about, or when they just wanted to be together as a family, they sat together at the table for dinner.

Today, Appie had something to say.

“Serious about what?” Artie asked.

“The trip,” Appie answered. “They want to absolutely make it happen.”

“Hmm,” Artie said.

“Is Bee going?” Patty asked.

“Yes,” Appie said.

“Oh,” Patty said. “Then, you can go. I’m not worried.”

“Is he that good?” Artie asked.

“He is,” Patty said. “Actually, I’m thinking we should meet. As families. The three of us. Bee and his family. It’s nice to have friends. Especially ones that good.”

“Mom,” Appie said. “What do you think you’re doing?”

“Helping my clueless daughter who doesn’t realise how badly she needs help,” Patty said.

Artie burst into laughter. His wife’s tongue was too sharp for his daughter who was no match. And his daughter’s expression was impossible to not laugh at.

Appie pouted.

“You go on the trip,” Patty said. “Have fun. Stay with Bee. He’ll take care of you. And after you come back, we’ll meet. The families.”

“Yes,” Artie said. “The families will meet. Can’t believe it. My daughter is already so old. We’re discussing her engagement.”

“Stop it,” Patty said, slapping her husband lightly on his back. “She’ll get embarrassed. Look.”

Appie was embarrassed. There was no stopping her when her mother was in such a mood. And when her father was also in such a mood and indulging his darling wife. There really was no escape from the embarrassment.

But Appie couldn’t keep the smile buried either. The thought of getting engaged to Bee was so nice. So sweet.

“Alright now,” Patty said, knocking the table sharply with her knuckles to bring Appie back. “Enough with the dreams. Come back. Finish your dinner. Go to your room. Lay in your bed. And then, continue dreaming.”

The parents burst into laughter again.

Appie gobbled up her dinner. And ran back to her room, locking the door behind her.