Drowning

03

P a i g e

I woke up when I heard a few knocks from the door. I checked the time and it was eight fifteen in the morning making me groan. I didn't want to go to school besides they will be having hand-to-hand combat lessons. I wouldn't be able to participate and I would surely end up sitting and watching them fight each other.

I closed my eyes again but I couldn't go back to sleep so I threw the blanket away and stood up then opened the door and I saw Eziel. He was bringing with him a bouquet of white flowers.

He smiled at me. "Happy birthday, Paige." He greeted and I smiled at him. I even forgot that today was my birthday.

I dive inside his arms and hugged him so tight. "I thought you forgot." I said and received the flowers.

"I will never forget."

"And you never failed to give me flowers too."

"I only give flowers to people who are important to me the most."

I smiled. Of course, he also give Jack flowers too and he liked the blue ones.

"Thank you." I said and Eziel went inside my room and went inside the bathroom and I heard the faucet running for a few seconds before he came out with a flower vase on his hand filled with water. It was the vase I bought for the flowers that Eziel would give me on my every birthday.

Eziel placed the vase on the top of the drawer beside the bed and I unwrapped the flowers and placed it inside the vase, arranging it.

"Thank you Eziel." I said and he kissed me on my forehead.

"Anything for you."

We went downstairs and I saw Jack carrying Cara, their daughter and she chuckled when she saw me, extending her arms to me. I always spend my days inside the pack house with her so I guess she was used to be with me always.

"Happy birthday Paige." Jack said and Cara leaned closer to me so I carried her.

"Thank you Jack."

I kissed Cara's cheeks and she tried to avoids her face from mine making me chuckle. I like it when I tease her.

"I hope you don't mind that I called Johan informing him that you won't be participating on your task today at school." He was referring to our training instructor.

"And by participate, you mean watching them spar." I said and Eziel smiled and nodded. I still couldn't handle skin to skin contact with someone I didn't know and trust "Thanks, I feel so relieve hearing that."

Eziel chuckled and snatched Cara from my arms. "And we prepared a birthday breakfast for the birthday boy." He excitedly said and lead me to the dining area. Eziel pulled a chair and motioned his free hand to sit. I frowned at him before I sat down.

"You don't have to serve me." I chuckled.

"It's your special day." He said and I wished that everyday would be my special day.

Eziel didn't want me to help as they served my breakfast and I was the only one sitting at the table. Maybe the rest were done having their breakfast since it was already eight. I smiled when they made my favorite foods and of course, I invited them to eat with me.

"Are you excited to meet your mate?" Jack asked in the middle of our breakfast and I froze.

I forgot about it. I never thought of my mate or did I dreamed that I could have one because of what I was. Just thinking about it made me feel afraid that my mate would reject me.

"No." I said and Jack looked at me. "I don't think I have one. I never thought about it."

"Of course, you have your mate." Jack said and I looked at Eziel who just nodded.

I couldn't imagine myself with someone I didn't know in an intimate way. Just thinking about it made my whole body shiver and itching and wanting to puke with my annoying phobia kicking in.

**

"How about Jack?" I asked Eziel. We were going to round the land. It was what we always do on my birthday because I never ever went anywhere around the pack land for a year, only inside the pack house and school except when we went to Alpha Kurt's land once.

"He's with Cara." He said and stripped his clothes one by one. "What are you standing for?" He smiled.

I haven't shifted into my wolf for months and I haven't heard of him since then that I thought he already died inside.

"My wolf hates me." I said and Eziel frowned.

"He doesn't and you need to exercise your wolf too."

"I never even exercise and now my wolf? He's much lazier than me."

"I don't want to hear any excuses."

"But you know what happened the last time I shifted." Caim took over me and ran like a wild wolf. I didn't know what happened because I wasn't aware at all.

"It'll be fine and you were scared that time."

I looked at Eziel and I trust him.

"The place has changed over the years and your tree had grown taller."

I smiled. It was the reason why I wanted to go out. I wanted to see our trees that we planted when we were young. Eziel planted his tree three years ahead of mine.

I removed my shirt and I felt conscious stripping out like everyone naturally does. I looked at Eziel and he was waiting for me, his arms squared with his shoulders.

"You go first." I said.

I watched him shifted into his wolf and his wolf was larger than mine. I sighed before I set aside my clothes and tried to shift into my wolf waking up Cain and I could feel that he was glad to finally came out from the shadows.

I growled and stretched my front legs. God, it was so stiff. I looked at Bartimæus, Eziel's wolf, and I looked like a kitten beside him. I was smaller compared to any were who has an alpha's blood.

We didn't take the path where we could see and encounter weres walking around, we travelled a different track and I just ran behind Eziel. I couldn't even keep my pace with his and I think he noticed making him run a little slower.

It felt like the place was the same as before. I couldn't remember since the surroundings were surrounded by different kinds of tall and huge trees but I could feel that it never changed through the years.

Doesn't it feel good to go out? Eziel said as he glanced at me for a second.

Yeah, but I still hate the idea of bumping into someone else on the way.

It'll be fine. Besides, I choose a different route.

I didn't remember that we planted our trees a little far from the pack house and that we had a pretty huge land. I was just looking ahead because looking at trees as we passed by was sending creeps to my whole body and I hated it.

Are you okay? We're almost there. Eziel suddenly asked.

Yes as long as you're with me.

It was farther than I thought and my legs were starting to hurt from running. I never run this far for a year and it was killing me and had Caim complaining about it.

All I could see were endless trees that extends everywhere around me and I didn't want to slow Eziel down so I tried to fight the strong urge to slow down and stop for a while and I never felt relieved when Eziel said that we we're almost there.

I felt glad when Eziel slowed down and I could see our trees, though it wasn't that tall compared to all the trees surrounding it but I could still recognize it because there was no other fir tree in that area.

We finally stopped and I thought my legs were going to give up before I could sit and pant like crazy.

You've seen our tree, now let me take control. I heard Caim said and I snubbed him making him growl.

I smiled as I glanced to our tree and I felt glad since my tree's catching up with Eziel's tree. Eziel shifted back and stretched his body, cracking his neck and back. It sounds painful but he looked so contented.

"Feels good to be back here." He said and I shifted back to human form and walked to my tree, brushing my fingers on the bark and smiled when I saw my initials that were carved by Eziel that was still visible.

"It's still here." I happily said and Eziel walked closer to look.

He ruffled my messy hair. "Yes and it was well carved."

I chuckled. "Of course, you broke your claw while doing this."

Eziel laughed remembering about it. He was twenty-four something and I was eight and he couldn't find anything to use for carving so he used his claws instead.

"I didn't." He kissed the top of my head and I remembered about the mate thing.

I could never imagine someone kissing my head like how Eziel does or hug me and everything.

"Am I going to meet my mate?" I asked.

"Are you worried he won't show up?"

I looked at him and shook my head. "Will it be a he?"

"It would be better if it's a male so he can protect you." He ran his fingers on my hair.

"Are you tired of protecting me? I—" I was cut when he cupped my face.

"Don't take it in a wrong way. Of course, I will never stop protecting you and you know that." He pinched my cheek and I smiled at him. He was too close but I wouldn't mind if it was him.

I sometimes thought about being his burden even though he always did his best to make me feel like I belong. I couldn't imagine living my life without Eziel.

**

They prepared dinner for my birthday and everyone was invited but I didn't go outside the pack house. I was only looking from the window of the living room while everyone were having dinner outside.

"Aren't you going to eat with us?" Sonya, one of my classmate and a sentinel's daughter, asked me.

I let go of the curtain letting it cover the window. "I already did, thanks." I walked pass her on the way to the staircase.

"Happy birthday." She said and I gave her a small smile . I didn't want to be friends with anyone. I did try before but they kept on asking questions that I didn't want to answer, they kept pushing me to try things I didn't want to do saying it would be fine, that everything would be okay but I would be the one ended up crying alone because I did what they said. They wouldn't understand what I was feeling.

I knew what Sonya was doing. She was trying to befriend me but it would be better to stay away. I could live without friends. Eziel, Chris, Clark and Jack would be enough for me. They could understand me better than anyone else.

**

I stayed inside my room and read some books that I took from the library when I heard a knock from the door.

I looked at it and I could smell Clark, Chris' mate and the alpha of the pack. I placed the book on the bed and stood up, went to the door and opened it.

Clark never talk to anyone except for the people closest to him and we were close right after Chris introduced him as his mate. He was so shy and so naïve and we kind of like the same things.

"Hey, Paige. Everyone's enjoying outside, Eziel was looking for you and he was kinda busy with entertaining the weres with Chris, and Jack was stuck with the pups. You should go out and enjoy your birthday." He said in one breath and I watched him catching his breath making me smile.

I wish I could but I couldn't.

"I like it better here." I said and he gave me a genuine sad smile unlike the way everyone else's sad smile that I could visibly see pity in their eyes and I somehow hated seeing it.

"Do you want me to stay with you?"

I shook my head. "You don't have to. I was going to bed anyway, I feel tired after I went out with Eziel."

Clark hesitantly nodded his head. "Are you sure?"

I lowly chuckled. "Yes. Thank you, honeybunch." It was what Chris calls just to piss him and I could see his cheeks turning red.

"I'm not honeybunch." He said and I watched him hesitantly walking away from my room.

I decided to go to sleep early and it felt like I just closed my eyes when I was woken up, feeling chills suddenly ran up my body waking up all my senses and the room suddenly smelt like a sweet scent of flowers. It was so strong but it was pleasant to the nose and it was doing something strange on my body making my heartbeat starts beating like a drum making me hard to breathe. Caim was trying to kick in. He was going crazy and kept on grunting "mate, mate."

"Don't fight it."

I screamed and hastily crawled to the headboard and hugged myself when I noticed that someone was standing inside my room. At the corner and I couldn't recognize his voice yet he sounded familiar.

"Mate." Caim said and I didn't want to believe it.

"Yes, mate." He said and walked closer. "I've been waiting for this day to come."