Drowning

P a i g e Something was going on outside was what I heard but I didn't know what and it was that time when pups were gathered in one place and I loved it because I got to play with my friends even after past the school hours and we could spend the night sleeping together in one huge room. We were still playing in the sleeping quarter with my friends when one of the elders told us to go to bed and sleep early. My friend's parents picked them one by one and walked to their respective sleeping places in the huge room until I was the only one left sitting alone on the floor. I didn't have parents—more like they died early was what Eziel, my older brother, told me. I just bowed my head and looked at the floor for long minutes until I saw a familiar sneakers came into view and he crouched down. I smiled and jumped inside his arms excitedly hearing him chuckled. "Did you wait long?" Eziel asked and I shook my head as I snaked my short arms around his neck. "I'm sleepy." I said and he stood up, carrying me, making me giggle and we walked to the group of pups who were already laying down in each other's sleeping bags. Eziel placed me down in a sleeping mat sized for two people and I laid down as I watched him removed his sneakers and then mine before he laid down beside me and told me some stories. He always does every night and I kept on requesting him the Jack and the Beanstalk story which was my personal favorite. I love my brother more than anything and anyone else in the whole world because he was always there for me. He was my everything. I hugged him as I listened to the very familiar story, I almost memorized all the scenes and words. I closed my eyes and slowly drifted into a deep sleep with my brother's voice in my mind. ** I woke up when I felt like using the rest room and instead of Eziel, I saw my friend sleeping beside me making me frown. I slowly stood up and sleepily walked out to look for Eziel. It was cold and quiet outside that I could only hear the wind. I walked to a nearby tree to take a piss making me chuckle because I looked like an old man pissing everywhere outside. I was about to head back inside after when I bumped into something hard and I gasped when he covered my mouth with his huge hands and hit me on the back of my head and everything went black. ** ". . .aige!" I breathed in sharply as I opened my eyes and I saw Eziel wearing a worried look on his face and he pulled me inside his arms and cried. I could feel my body shaking from the awful memory. I just sat there on the cold floor frozen inside Eziel's arms and hearing my loud heartbeat and Eziel's cries. I didn't want to see and hear Eziel crying but I kept on making him cry. Tears stared streaming down my cheeks and Eziel wiped it with his thumbs. "I'm sorry, it was all my fault." He said and I wanted to say that it wasn't his fault but I couldn't open my mouth to talk. I only cried silently. I just wanted those horrible nightmares to stop haunting me every night. I wanted to stop Eziel from worrying about me. I didn't want him to be sad. I didn't want him to turn his back on me one day because I fear that he would grow tired of my condition. ** I gave Eziel a small smile when he placed a plate on the side of my table with my favorite foods and I wanted to tell him that it was too much but I didn't bother to say anything. "You need to eat all your foods." He said and Chris, our cousin and the new alpha in the pack, smiled at me and agreed to Eziel. I nodded my head and started eating my lunch. Everyone there wanted to cheer me up but I couldn't bring myself to smile, except for Eziel and Chris. Eziel was smiling as he looked at me while I was still chewing my food. I was trying to eat all the foods he got me because I didn't want to disappoint him. "You don't really have to eat it all if you're already full." He said and he handed me a glass of orange juice. I nodded and drank it, washing the foods I was chewing for almost half a minute. "Thank you." I muttered and he kissed the top of my head making me smile. After a few weeks of just staying beside me, Eziel returned to visiting his mate to our allied pack land. He has been going there for years and I couldn't even bring to sulk at him no matter how I really wanted to. I could say he was so crazy for his mate, Jack. I know Jack was his mate but I couldn't help but feel angry at him for stealing Eziel from me. I hated him for doing that making me feel bitter when it comes to Jack. "What do you want to eat, Paige?" Lorain, one of the cook in the pack house and the nanny that Eziel assigned to me, asked. I didn't need a nanny but Lorain was really a great help and a very good friend to me. I didn't want to give her additional stress and headache. She was already in her early thirties and her mate was the head scout of the pack. I shook my head no. "I'm not really hungry, Lorain. Thank you for asking." I said politely and she looked at me worriedly. "Are you sure?" She asked again. "Yes." I smiled at her. "Just tell me if you want something." She patted my head before she walked back to the kitchen. I sat farther on the couch and brought my feet up, spreading my legs and crossed my feet below and tried to focus my attention to the TV. All I always did was to wait for Eziel to come home. I looked around the pack house and saw few of the pack members walking in and out of the pack house. I didn't want to go out but I already felt so tired looking around the house so I decided to stepped outside and the sun was brighter than usual, I think or was it just because I didn't go out of the house for the whole week and forgot how bright the sun was. "Hey, Paige." I turned around when I heard someone called my name. It was Wyatt and he was a classmate. I wasn't really close to him nor everyone else in the class because I always separated myself and I chose the farthest chair from everyone else. I never want to go to school but Eziel said it could make me feel better if I do and it could help me slowly cope up with my condition if I would have interactions with more people. They never really paid any attention to me rendering it useless. "Hey." I greeted back. "I haven't seen you for a week." He said. "Yeah. I wasn't feeling well." I said. Only the higher ups and everyone who were residing in the pack house knows about what happened to me before. They didn't spread it around which I was grateful. All they just said was that I was just fragile and easily get sick but I still feel like everyone already knows the truth. Wyatt frowned. "Are you okay?" He placed his hand on my shoulder and I flinched from the sudden contact feeling my heart quickened its pace when he invaded my personal space. It felt like my skin was burning from the touch even though there was my shirt shielding my skin. It still stings. I took a step back and smiled nervously. "I'm fine. Thanks. I-I need to go back." I huffed and hurriedly went inside the pack house and climb the stairs to my room. I closed the door and I tried to calm myself down when I was already alone inside my room. My shoulder wasn't just burning. It was getting painful and the feeling made me want to puke. I was just holding myself not to run to the bathroom and throw up everything. I just slid down below my bed, sitting on the floor and hugged my knees as I started crying and rocking myself. I just wanted for Eziel to come back and comfort me like he always does.