Finding Love

16

If you see me jogging,

Please kill whatever the

Fuck is chasing me.

"s**t, s**t, s**t" I panic when I walk into my room and quickly grab my books. ‘I didn't know you could curse so well, popcorn' I hear an amused voice saying from the doorpost. ‘Not now, Alex. We're going to be late, no, we're already late' I rattle on in panic mode. ‘Chill popcorn, you're going to e fine, it is not like you are going to die from it’ Alex says reassuringly, as he grabs my shoulders to make me standstill. Only, it doesn't reassure me at all, it only makes me more nervous.

‘Maybe not you, but I am and I'm too young to die, I haven't achieved anything in my life yet. So get out of the way' I say when I push him to the side and walk down. "Come on, slugs. I thought if you could do something useful in your lives, it would be being quick since you're on the football team and all' I hurry up the boys. At ease, they get out the front door, into the car. Owen walks by me and rubs my hair.

When I'm sure we haven't forgotten anyone, I get in the car next to Jax. He puts his arm around my shoulder and I rest my head on it, exhausted. The day is already going bad, luckily it couldn't get any worse, I think to myself. But what was I wrong, the day had only just begun.

20 minutes late, we arrive at the college. Quickly, I jump out of the car when I'm already walking forward, as in sprinting forward. After 10 steps, I bump into someone and fall on the ground. A hand grabs my arm as I am pulled back up my feet. " In a hurry?" Dylan asks amused. I just want to answer when I'm pulled away from Dylan.

Standing next to me, you can guess, are standing the 5 guys. Alex just wants to hit Dylan when I grab his arm. Under my hand, I feel his muscles tighten, which makes me forget what's going on. I am taken out of my mind when Alex says my name. I shake my head to get out of dreamland when I speak to Alex. "It was my fault, I didn't look where I was going.’

I can still see Alex doubtfully looking between me and Dylan when Jax puts his hand on Alex's shoulder and squeezes it, "We're already late, let's just go.’ Alex nods and pushes me forward with his hand in my back but not without looking threateningly at Dylan again. Gratefully, I give Jax a smile but then he rubs his hand through my hair, making me pout.

At the oak tree, I say goodbye to the boys. One by one, I give them a hug as Owen rubs my hair and Jax presses me a kiss on my forehead. I am just giving Alex a hug, which seems to take a bit longer than with the other boys when I am roughly pushed aside. I fall with my a*s on the ground and a frightening sound leaves my throat. Jax pulls me straight as he looks at Chelsey angry, just like the others. What now? I think to myself. I never should have said the day couldn't get any worse. I should have known it is bad luck.

"Who the hell do you think you are?" Chelsey yells at me angrily as her eyes are like a spitfire. Without waiting for an answer, she just keeps yelling at me. "Why are you hugging my boyfriend? You don't think he'd like a nerd like you, do you?" she laughs meanly. "You're just the fat, ugly duckling that everybody feels sorry for. Why else do you think these guys would hang out with someone like you?’

Waiting for my answer, I feel that the tears that arose during her speech, almost overflow. I mumble a quick apology as I run away. I feel the tears sliding down my cheeks as memories of the past return, making me cry louder. I just want to walk into my building, when I am stopped by a person grabbing my wrist. I am turned around as I come face to face with Aiden.

I pull my hand out of his grip and wipe my tears. ‘Hey, Lily, you okay? What Chelsey said really isn't...’ I interrupt him by shaking my head. "I have to go, I'm already late" I mumble as I walk to my classroom, leaving Aiden behind.

I'm saying goodbye to Lexi as I walk to my second class. I had to tell Lexi everything about what happened as she noticed my red swollen eyes and red nose, which made me look like Rudolph. I have this class with Alex, something I'm not looking forward to. That's why I put myself in the front on purpose, knowing that Alex is always sitting at the back. The class almost starts when I feel someone sitting next to me. Not bothering to look up, I read the lesson again.

‘Popcorn' I hear the voice of the person next to me say. Angry that I hadn't looked up in the beginning to avoid this situation, I look around the classroom, looking for another place to sit. I see in the far left corner that there is a seat available. I just get up and want to walk to my new place, when the professor greets us and class begins. I angrily drop back into my chair, ignoring Alex for the rest of the lesson.

After class, I walk out of the classroom as fast as I can. Behind me, I hear Alex calling my name, but I walk on even faster, increasing the distance between us. After a few more corners, I hear someone calling my name. This time I slow down my pass when I see my girlfriends walking towards me, determined.

‘We're going shopping' Britte says, leaving no room for contradiction. She hooks her arm through mine as I let myself out of the building without protest. I feel my friends look at me with pity a few times when Kim breaks the silence in the car. "Let's have fun.’

We're three hours away and the mall is about to close. I bought the least of everyone with one pair of jeans, two pulls, and two t-shirts. Kim has bought three pairs of pants and shirts, two skirts, four dresses and a pair of shoes. Lexi bought a whole supply of makeup, enough for when there's an apocalypse, and a few more dresses. Surprisingly, Britte has bought the most of us. With five pairs of pants, three skirts, eight t-shirts and two pairs of shoes.

Dragging all out bags along, we walk into the last shop. I walk around the shop while I touch something once in a while. I hear Lexi shouting that she is going to the dressing room, followed by Kim and Britte. I keep on walking around until I see a nice white dress in the far corner, tucked away at the back of the shop. Hypnotized, I walk towards it when I feel the soft fabric under my fingers. The rug is a long one and just doesn't touch the ground, so I probably have to wear a heel so I don't trip over it, the disadvantage of being small which is also an advantage, because I can put on heels, not that I've ever done it. The fabric is a bit looser which makes the rug move in the wind, from the air conditioning, and the top, which is cut out, not too much, just showing the perfect cleavage. Without looking at the size, I take the rug to the checkout. At the cash register, I see silver heels, which I pay immediately.

Tired, I close the front door behind me. On the way to my room, I meet Finn who looks at me worried. Quickly, he rushes towards me as he takes the bags from me and walks with me to my room. In my room, he puts the bags down as I drop me on my bed. I feel him put the blanket over me and press a kiss on my forehead before he leaves the room again and I fall asleep.