She Keeps Me Warm

Chapter Eleven

Mistakes... I remember when I was a kid and I 'mistakenly' stole my mom's car... God! That day. I knew what a hiding was and I instilled in my mind what 'mistake' meant.

My father explained to me that taking something knowingly without permission wasn't a mistake... a mistake was tripping and falling... because I don't think anyone plans on that.

So... for Valentia Louw to fucken stand in front of coach and say kissing me was a mistake! That was absurd. She kissed me more than once and she knew what she was doing. She didn't trip and caught her lips on mine.. she leaned over and kissed me knowingly... so her saying that was a mistake was just fucken bullshit!

I was fucken hurt... I mean I couldn't even explain why it hurt like this because me and Ms Louw were nothing or we didn't even label what we were...but that didn't make it hurt any less. It actually hurt more.

So she was dating coach and didn't feel the need to tell me.. we kissed.. more than once for goodness sake. And it didn't occur to her that she should mention the fact that she is seeing someone.

I sighed as I slowly walked back home from practice. I honestly gave mo f**k if I could get mugged or killed. I was just walking...

It was about 20/30 minutes walk when I'm as slow as I'm walking right now...

My phone vibrated and I ignored it. It kept on vibrating but I ignored it. I think I knew who it was so I didn't want to talk to her.

I slowly walked and jumped when I heard a car hoot behind me. I turned and saw the devil herself..

"I thought we were meeting..." she said opening her window. I kept quiet and kept walking.

She drove right next to me, "Lin I was expecting you in my office, and I have been trying to call you."

I ignored her...

"Olwethu Babe.. come on.. I know you're not okay.. just talk to me..."

I was a bit surprised that she called me 'babe' but I ignored her still...

"Okay.." she sighed, "Don't talk to me as in tell me what happened.. just say something to me."

I rolled my eyes, was she f*****g with me...

"Olwethu... talk to me."

I scoffed, "as if you talk to me.."

She stopped the car, "what is that supposed to mean? Can you get in the car?"

"No, I'll walk..."

"Olwethu!"

"I said I'll walk Valentia... so can you leave me alone please." I snapped and she frowned.

I kept walking. I was just hurt that she probably kissed her girlfriend and lied to her about whatever happened between me and her and they made up. The thought of that just f****d me up.

"Olwethu please get in the car..."

I turned around the corner and came in view with my home. In five minutes I'll be home and away from her.

"Olwethu..."

"Geeze I'm home... could you leave me alone please Valentia.."

"What did I do wrong? Why are you mad? I'm the one who was waiting for you in my office and you never pitched..." she said matter of factly and I rolles my eyes, "right... as if you was just sitting there all alone waiting for me."

She furrowed her brows at me, "what does that mean? I was waiting for you Lin!"

"Of course you were." I said and walked faster. She tried to call for me but I turned and made my way to my front porch... I didn't even look back, I just went straight in and then my bedroom.

I hated how she acted like she didn't know why coach was treating me like s**t, while all this time she knew they were f*****g. Couldn't she think that maybe coach was jealous that I have been getting much attention from her.. because every time when I was late it was "Ms Louw"... mxm.. I should have known she was jealous.

My phone vibrated and it was Val.. or Vee.. whatever they call her. She was calling and I ignored it. I put my phone on charge and went to take a quick shower and change to my PJs..

When I was done I went to my family downstairs to eat.

"So, ready for tomorrow?" My dad asked as we all ate and I shrugged, "I think so... even though I don't think I'll play."

"I heard Rosemary has been giving Montgomery a tough time.. so if she wants to win, she'll put you in..." he said.

"Can I go watch?" Barbie asked looking at my mom and she shook her head, "tomorrow it's friday, you have school remember.."

My little sister frowned. I kissed her, "look I might not play, but I promise to be with you when I'm sure that I'll play. I'll go ask you at school."

She smiled, "pinky promise?"

I gave her my small finger and we pinky promised.

I went up after eating claiming I have homework while in reality I wanted to just get in bed and sleep my ass off.

My phone was blinking and I had a few messages and two missed calls from Valentia. One message eas from her. I ignored the rest and opened hers.

VALENTIA: I don't know what's wrong. I'm not psychic so I won't be able to just guess why you don't wanna talk to me.

I quickly responded.

ME: You had the decency to just shut up and not say anything when I told you your girlfriend was making my life a living hell in the field and what just got on my last nerve is how you managed to kiss me more than once without even mentioning that you was f*****g Mariah. So tell your girlfriend to grow the f**k up I didn't know you two were dating.... and if you were kissing me trying to fool me to tell you about my life, I'm so glad I couldn't tell you. You and Mariah deserve each other.

I put the darn thing in silence and went to sleep... I was going to watch soccer tomorrow, so I needed to fully rest.

..

Friday arrived way too quickly for me, when I checked my phone for a new message from Valentia, it wasn't there.. So she didn't respond. Well... f**k her!

My phone vibrated and it was no one other than my bestie.

"Ass... morning. I need to get ready today is the big day."

'big day my foot.. why isn't my best friend answering my phone calls...'

"Because she's busy getting her s**t together asshole..why else?"

I heard her sigh and I knew she didn't believe me, 'you're not okay.. what's been happening?'

I honestly didn't want her to worry about s**t right now, so I lied, "I'm okay Precious babe I promise..."

'you called me Precious.. you're not okay... I'm worried about you and you ain't even telling me what is going on..' she said sadly.

I felt awful. She was telling the truth. I didn't want to tell her about Valentia.. it killed me and I didn't want her telling me what she thought about this. I wasn't ready for people's opinions, worse because nothing was absolutely happening between me and my teacher... but I knew that I couldn't keep lying, she knew me and she knew that I wasn't okay..

"Okay Rosie I'm not okay and I haven't been because I've been having..."

'dreams... are they back?'

Yeah, she knew me like that. Well not like knew knew.. she only knew that I was crazy abused... she's the only one who has seen my bruises on my body...

"Yeah... not just them though.. he kinda hit twice...."

'... God Olwethu I....' she cut me off but I cut her off, "..it's not a big deal.. it's March... I'll be out and legal before you know it..."

'to think I thought since you guys are that side it would be better... it should be better.' She said the last part to herself.

"It's not better because it's not the environment but him... it's him... and I promise next year s**t will.be looking good... I'll be out."

'okay... just... be safe.. stay out of trouble. Get you ready to kick some ball today and all the best okay. I love you.'

I laughed at the last statement because she barely said it, "wooow... okay.. I love you too I guesss.. will talk later babe. Bye.."

After talking to her I felt a bit calmer than I was. She was just a breath of fresh air I swear.

I went to my bathroom and bathed. Not forgetting to shave all the haired area.. well besides my head. I loved my long hair.

I went downstairs and daddy was there waiting..

"You're late... it's nine and you're still here."

He smiled, "I'm not missing my older daughter's first game."

I rolled my eyes, this guy had more than one personalities and it seemed like he didn't even know that. When he was playing perfect daddy I'd wish he'd stay like that forever.. but he was also perfect in being horrible because then he'd turn to this person I hated and didn't know. Whatever personality he was on, he'd master it.

I shook my head, "you didn't have to... Stacy is fetching me."

"Oh I know, I'll go with her dad. We will meet you guys there."

I nodded, "thanks I guess.. I'll see you there then." I said the last sentence the moment I heard a car outside. It was definitely for me.

"I'll lock.." he said and I ran to take an apple and the lunch my mom made then got out.

"Mr Lewis.. how are you?" I was startled by Stacy's father. He smiled and pulled me into a hug, "hey there. I can't wait to watch you."

I was so tired of telling people that I won't be playing. So I decided in just not mentioning it.

"Cool... I'll go now..."

I joined Stacy in the car and threw my bag at the back.. I opened my arms, "Come to momma... come.."

She ached her brow, "the f-u-c-k.. no."

I laughed, leaned over and managed to kiss her sholder since she was running away from me.

"Well hi to you too... and thank you for being my driver..."

She shrugged, "Cool.."

"I thought you said your parents were out of the country..." I said as she started to drive and heard her sigh, "daddy came back to watch you play.."

My heart sank, "you don't hate me right..."

"Why?"

"Getting what you've always been wanting from your dad...?"

She shrugged, "at least your dad is also giving it to me. So we're even."

My jaw dropped. Did she just fucken say that.

"You need to stay away from my dad Stacy.. for your own good."

She rolled her eyes, "right.. as if you'll stay away from my dad..."

"Well I'm not anywhere near him. He's after me."

"So is yours..."

Fuck this wasn't good. If my dad got Stacy close to him it wouldn't be good at all and she was at risk of him doing what he did to me.

"Just stay away from Sipho.. I don't want you to get hurt... I swear to God if you could get hurt I wouldn't be able to forgive myself." I said and she shook her head, "leave my dad alone."

Fuck!

Day ruined... I mean it's just beginning.. the hell! Why couldn't life just be a little fucken nice to me? For a fucken day.. just be good to me for a day.

I jumped out of the car the second she stopped it at yhe school's parking lot...

"Lin wait.." she said following me and I stubbornly kept going.

"Lin... just..." She pulled my hand, "...wait... I'm.. I'm so hurt okay.. My dad flies back from his vacation or whatever to come watch you play and he never comes to my presentation or whatever even when he's here... I'm mad."

"At me?" I asked, "I didn't ask your dad to do all that s**t for me.. hack I didn't even know he was here... and being friends with Sipho is your only option..?"

She sighed, "yeah it is. At least he's here and he listens..."

My heart sank. She was just making this easy for him. And for some stupid reason I cared about her and I wasn't going to put her in the equation too.

"Lewis I'm warning you.. stay away from him.. for your own good..."

She rolled her eyes, "yeah right..."

"You've seen what he has done to mee..." I said in almost a whisper pulling her to a nearby corner since other kids were arriving.

"But he'd never do that to me... my daddy would..."

"..Not fucken know. Your daddy would not fucken know... Stacy please.. I'm begging you. He is dangerous.."

"Look... I know he's disciplined you.... and it was a bit tough for you to handle.... but.."

I shook my head, oh hell no she didn't say that. She didn't use that 'discipline' line on me.. so he got to her too....?

I spat, "so you rather be friends with an abuser and a r****t!!"

She looked at me with horror in her eyes. I couldn't take back what I had said.. but I could do one thing and that was to stay the hell away from her and for good this time.

She tried to hold my hand but I pulled away and ran off to the locker. When I got here, others were sitting.

"Hey.. come join us for a little prayer while we wait for coach.." Anna, our vice captain said to me and I nodded, "cool... so like is this a tradition..? We pray before every game."

"Not every game... just Rosemary and.."

"Well... sorry for cutting you off Sandra.. but don't y'all guys think that's a bit weird.. y'all only test God on these and he always makes you fail.. why don't y'all just stop praying at all or pray to all them games.."

"She has a point... I say we go with her guys.." Oscar said.

"Go with who on what?" Coach asked walking in with the rest of the girls...

"Well Lin was suggesting that we..."

"Nothing..." I cut Anna off, "I was suggesting nothing. In fact I was quiet and just listening to them. I didn't suggest anything.." I said knowing exactly that this woman could still act immature and make my stay here a living hell since she already hated my guts for something I had no idea about.

"What was she suggesting...?" Coach asked again.

Oscar opened her mouth, "that we..."

"Nothing!" I yelled looking at the girl.. couldn't she get the hint that I didn't want them talking about this. "I suggested nothing.. now, I don't wanna cause any problems or start anything.. so can we now do whatever you guys were doing... and take me out of whatever suggestions.. I have a long week I'm not about to have a long weekens because you guys couldn't shut up about stupid suggestions..." I said the last part looking at the team and they frowned.

"Don't talk to your teammates like that Lin!" Coach warned me and I nodded my head smiling at her, "of course I knew you were going to say that....."

"Everyone get dressed and leave. Lin! Get dressed and stay here with me. I need to have a word with you.." she ordered and people started dressing but I didn't do that s**t. I wasn't up for her shitty moods.. if she had a person to be mad at, it was her fucken girlfriend, not ME!

"Lin! I'm expecting you to get dressed..." she said looking at me and I sighed, "you know coach you've humiliated me all this week and made me regret trying out for soccer in this school right in front of them.. I'm just surprised that right now after everything you'd only want privacy..."

"Lin..."

"Yesterday afternoon you called me a slut... well I didn't know it was actually what you meant until I heart my 'teammates' talking about it to themselves.. you don't fucken know me one bit Coach! yet you stood next to me in that ground and called me a slut telling me to sleep with people my age... did I sleep with people your age Coach?" I spat without even thinking and I heard everyone gasp in shock.....

Right about now I had no fucken idea what I was doing but I couldn't stop. I was tired.. sick and tired of being treated like the bad one all the time here. I knew I wasn't perfect but I didn't deserve all the s**t they were throwing at me.

"Everyone out!" Coach shouted and the girls who already had their kit on made their way out.

I sighed, "what's the use coach? Wanna tell me off like you always been doing.. why are you changing now? Why do you want them out of our hearing aid only now?"

"Anna leave that and get out now!"

I bit the inside of my cheek nervously as I heard the door shut. It was just me and her now. She could kill me, chew me and then spit me out for all I cared. I wasn't taking back what I said.

She stood a bit distance from me and just looked at me. I was nervous and just wanted her to tell me that I was out of the team and never to show my face in front of her....

She sighed audibly, "You're right about one thing Lin... I don't know you.. that doesn't mean you know me though..."

"And me not knowing you doesn't mean I deserved to be treated the way you've been since Thursday last week... I thought you'd forgive me for suggesting you move the match.. but s**t got worse.. sorry for my language.."

"Olwethu..."

She looked like she was about to spill and she looked so tired or torn.. So I decided to be the bigger person and just keep talking and show her that I'm not in the wrong. Her fucken girlfriend is.

"I didn't know." I said and she furrowed her brows in confusion.

"I didn't know okay... I thought she was single.. she didn't tell me. Since I got here she's been nice, okay not all been nice, she was a b***h at first but then she became nice and I like her.. so I let it happen. I didn't know she was seeing someone, she never mentioned it."

She sighed, "Olwethu..."

"It explains it all..." I kept going, "why you've been mad at me..it means you saw us. I know she's my teacher and it shouldn't have happened but I.. I didn't know that you were dating her. So if you have anyone to be angry at.. it's your girlfriend... not me..!"

Now I was so satisfied that I put it all down in front of her. But when I looked at her, she had one look I couldn't quite get. Was it Confusion? Or Shock?

"Honey... You said my what?"

"Girlfriend...?" I fucken hesitated that but then made myself clear, "Ms Louw is your girlfriend.. right? It's why you've been mad at me since she and I kissed..."

She ached her brow, "oh noo... Vee and I aren't dating.. God Lin. Vee is.. I'm sorry.."

Fucken confused I looked at her, "what?"

"I am so sorry for the way I have been treating you and everything I said. I was out of line. I really shouldn't have been so hard on you. You're right I should have talked to her and not you. She knows better. I'm so sorry kid."

"Jesus.. I'm still stuck at you guys aren't dating. The way you acted back there... I thought you was angry I kissed your girl.."

"Oh God no... she's so NOT my type."

I laughed, "for real? What's your type?"

She frowned and I regretted asking that.. and soon changed the subject, "I saw you guys yesterday after practice and you were so mad..."

"Well, she's family.."

I rolled my eyes, "You're white coach, she's black."

She smiled, "yeah... you're black and your surname is Lin.."

"My grandfather was Chinese.. daddy was adopted..he doesn't know his parents.. so he's been using Lin and so did I when he legally adopted me." I said and mentally hit myself the moment I realized that I just told coach something only Precious knew about me.. the f**k!

She nodded, "well.. I was engaged to her younger sister.. or cousin..."

I couldn't help but catch only one word there, "was?"

"Yeah... she passed away a week before the wedding.. drunk driver..."

Fuck!

She smiled a bit, "she was my type.."

"I'm so sorry coach.."

"And I'm sorry too... for the way I treated you."

"Water under the bridge...and time is moving." I said the last part looking at my wrist watch.

She smiled a bit, "so, want to go kick some ball.. Mr Lewis really is rooting for the team for the first time and he is a potential sponsor.."

"So much pressure coach..."

She smiled, "I'm really sorry for the way I treated you. You didn't deserve it."

I winked, "well coach, let's go kick some ball."

Maybe.. just maybe I forgive her....