Farfalla

11.

12:15 AM

"I'm not saying it's not a good idea." Harry's voice was raspy and tired when I heard him and Niall discussing matters in the room across from me.

We had made more permanent arrangements here in Florence by moving what things we had into a house out in the country. The house sat next to a vineyard where my heart destined to go, I wanted to run through it as girls did in the movies. Despite my 99 cent dream, Harry had confined me to the inside of the house and the backyard that held a tire swing and hammock.

I laid listening in my bedroom, the door cracked open enough to hear Niall and Harry discussing something behind their closed door. Harry wanted his way with things but Niall was just as stubborn, Harry was meeting his match in this department.

"Then what is the problem?" Niall raised his voice slightly from being tired and irritated that he was having to argue with Harry on this matter.

"I'm not teaching her!" I could imagine Harry's movements when he said this. I pictured him running a hand through his hair and taking his eye contact away from Niall's.

"Why not?" Niall was questioning Harry's reasoning which I perked up to wanting to know his real explanation as to why he didn't want to train me. What set me apart from any other person? I knew Harry didn't take a liking to me but just because he didn't like me was not a valid reason.

He sighed loudly enough for me to hear behind the door that I watched through my own cracked open door. One shadow underneath was pacing back and forth, moving the light and shading others while it paced all around the room. I sat up in bed paying close attention to what he was going to say next.

"She has the strength of a toothpick, what difference will it make if I show her a few things? I'm not one that wastes time." Harry spoke his voice getting raspier and raspier as the night drug on. My jaw clenched and eyes narrowed at his statement, what I would give to burst through the door and prove him wrong. In essence, he was saying I was weak and a waste of his time to try and train due to his perceptions of me. I wanted to prove to him I wasn't some fragile doll, I could hold my own if I had the right tools. If Harry trained me I could help in protecting myself, I could take off the workload that Harry carried on his shoulders.

"Toothpick or not, if something like that airport situation happens again we may not be so lucky in getting her back. We can talk to Frost tomorrow about what he thinks but, I already know he's going to agree." Niall was confident in himself when he spoke to Harry, I actually took a liking to Niall. He treated me like a normal human being, unlike Harry who treated me like dirt with all of his comments aimed towards my self-esteem. Harry held the control because of the things he said.

Harry meant what he said, I didn't ever dare challenge that because when he said he would do something he always meant it.

"I'm going to bed," Harry responded with heavy steps towards the door. Quickly laying back down I closed my eyes and calmed my breathing in case he came in to check on me. Also if he saw me wide awake his mood would only worsen with him accusing me of yet again eavesdropping. It was true, I was eavesdropping but from his disapproval earlier today I didn't dare let him catch me again.

With only tiny slits in my eyes to see through, everything was blurry and unfocused when Harry emerged from the lit up bedroom. His figure dark in the unlit hallway as he peeked as I suspected into my bedroom. He stood in the cracked open doorway looking at my sleeping state, barely able to make out any details of his appearance he soon walked away shutting the door fully.

Opening my eyes back up I laid on my back staring at the ceiling. Tomorrow I had to show Harry that I was worthwhile, I had to prove to him I wasn't as weak as he thought I was. I was determined to change his perception of me. I didn't think of myself as fragile but he did and that was what I needed to change, I wanted to show him that I was able to hold my own in a fight. I wanted to learn from him how to fight properly, how to defend myself when necessary. Smirking to myself I made shapes and images out of the ceiling, something I did to help me fall asleep more easily.

4:00 AM

Stop!" I screamed shooting open my eyes to the darkness encasing me. Sweat formed on my forehead as I looked around frantically to see I was all alone in this room. The only light that was visible was the moonlight streaming in from the curtains, a pool of light reflecting through the window. Taking control of my rapid breathing I sat up putting my head in my hands and breathing slow and deep, something that Louis had taught me to do.

After I felt like I had compressed myself to a more calm state I moved the comforter to expose my bare legs. Swinging my legs over the bed and standing up to my full height I walked to the door that Harry had closed to create more darkness. Most likely Harry and Niall were sound asleep, which meant I didn't need to worry about putting on a robe to cover my exposed skin that my bra and panties failed to cover.

Twisting the doorknob I walked on my tiptoes like a little kid sneaking about without her parents knowing. I did those on instinct hoping that being on my toes somehow made my steps quieter. I didn't want to wake Harry or Niall, I wasn't in the mood to explain why I was up out of bed. Harry already got annoyed at my sleep disturbances and I didn't want to keep coming up with excuses as to why I woke up like I did every night.

The hallway was long and dark from the bedrooms to the open concept kitchen. I walked in darkness using only my memory to navigate myself around in the darkness. Once I found myself in the kitchen the moonlight pooled in from the windows clearing up my vision. Padding my feet against the tile flooring that was cold to the touch I opened up the white cabinet to get myself a glass. Getting up on my tipto once again I reached my arms up to grab the glass I had my sights on. Sticking out my tongue in frustration I finally grazed my fingers against it pulling it into my hand.

Smiling with my success I made my way to the fridge to fill up the glass. Blinking a few times to adjust to the light coming from the water dispenser on the fridge I took my glass when there was a good amount of liquid. Tilting my head back I sipped the cool water leaning against the grey granite island.

The atmosphere was so peaceful, propped up against the counter and sipping on the cold water. My eyes drew to the window where the moon soaked the night with its light. My worrisome thoughts melting away with each drink I took of the refreshing water.

My mind reeled to what the morning would bring. I was determined to show Harry all I had. I was ready to work and the morning couldn't come any sooner. Hearing a shift in the air I widened my eyes when I saw a dark outline of a figure. Gasping I loosened my grip on my glass hearing as it crashes on the ground. Water spilling over my feet and glass scattering over the tile I pressed my body up against the counter in defense.

Light flicking on and temporarily blinding me I shut my eyes quickly turning my head away to adjust to the harsh light of the kitchen. Feeling completely exposed under the bright lights on instinct I attempted to cover my bare stomach.

"What the hell are you doing up Mia?" Harry's voice was groggy from sleep when he squinted through the bright lights. The contrast from light to dark also bothering his eyes.

"I needed a drink," I told him still attempting to cover myself when his eyes finally adjusted and looked at me with disapproval.

"You need a drink at four in the morning?" Harry asked me his tone becoming more annoyed that we were having this conversation at such an early hour of the morning.

"I was really thirsty." I reasoned hoping that it would calm his escalating mood. I didn't expect him to wake up, especially when I was trying to be so quiet.

"Your clumsy ass also made a mess. So clean it up and get back to bed now!" Harry's teeth gritted while his jaw clenched. He was being more hushed and careful not to wake Niall, it was too early to be up.

"Okay." I put my head down to look at all the shattered glass shards on the ground. Bending down I picked up the bigger pieces feeling embarrassed now that Harry was watching me do all of this. "You don't have to watch me."

"Obviously I do because you are a child." Harry spat at me. The comment burned into me starting a fire from the anger that was building up inside me once again.

"I haven't been a child since I was four years old." I gritted my teeth containing my anger. I needed to be smart and not exploit all my anger, that would only start an unwanted argument I was bound to lose against Harry.

Not responding back it was only a matter of time before I finished cleaning up the floor of any glass or liquid. The floor had looked even better than before, I made sure to pay close attention and work a little harder than usual with Harry's watchful eye on me.

"I don't want to see you out here ever again without any clothes on," Harry warned me walking or as I liked to call, escorting me to my bedroom. A blush creeped up on my cheeks hearing his comment, I felt even more exposed now after he expressed his rules.

"Okay." I nodded walking into my bedroom and closing the door on Harry to find myself alone once again. God, I hated him! He made he feel useless and stupid even though in theory I wasn't. I was smarter then he portrayed me to be, I was going to show him that in the morning.

-May 20, 2016