Reborn: The Rejected Luna

#6 - Empty

"But the boy stinks, father!"

"Well, that does not make him less human than any of us, princess."

"And what do we say about kindness, huh?"

"Everyone could do with a little bit of kindness. But mother--"

"Hush...no buts, sweetheart. Besides I'm sure that little boy must be sad because he no longer has his parents with him.

"He doesn't? Is that why he is covered in so much filth?"

"Oh dear, that is no way to speak of someone. He probably just hasn't had a bath in ages. With his parents gone, I'm sure he has no one else to take care of him."

"Oh, I don't know what I would do without the both of you. I certainly do not wish to look like that."

"No need to worry about that sweetheart, you'll always have us."

"I should probably give him some of my cookies to say sorry and maybe make him smile a little."

"That's my princess. You'll make a fine ruler and queen someday."

Irabel felt tears running down her face. Still in the dark cell, her latest memories were the only light that helped endure the darkness. Even though that came with immense pain to her heart. She hadn't been able to remember much, but she had had more flashes of her past life. And they had also gotten longer each time.

Her latest one hit her hard, however. With all the filth in the cell and the absence of her parents, she felt no different from the orphaned boy in her memories. For a moment she had even thought that her misfortune may have been because of how mean she had been to that little boy from so many years ago.

She lifted her hand wanting to wipe her tears away but she winced in pain. Her shoulder was still sore and weak too. After being locked away without so much as a drop of water or food, her limbs had been protesting more than usual. Only her focussing on the little that she remembered of her past happy life kept her from being aware of all the pain.

She had tried to be brave through it all too but her energy was spent and she could no longer keep her anguish at bay.

"You'll always have us...that is what you said mother…" Irabel broke down in the darkness. Ugly tears running down her face in torrents. She couldn't help it as the tightness in her chest forced her to let it all out. "Mother...father, you said you'd always be here, with me...so why am I all alone here?" She sobbed, not caring if anyone would hear her. Everything had suddenly just become too much and she couldn't take it anymore. It wasn't just about hunger or the filthy cell. She felt empty on the inside. With nothing and no one to hold on to, she wasn't sure she even wanted to be alive anymore. She wished she had remained dead.

"Hey you, get out here?!" Irabel winced at the loud voice. After being in silence for so long, the guard's loud voice felt like a punch to her aching head.

"I don't have all day." Annoyance filled the guard's tone and Irabel struggled to her feet lest he changed his mind and left her to rot in the cold cell. She almost tumbled back to the ground when she put her weight on her aching legs. She had forgotten that her hip was sore when she was hurled into the cell.

And with more difficulty, she finally reached for her face and wiped her tears. She had no idea how long she had been left in the cell but she was only too glad someone had come to fetch her.

Using the cold walls as her support, she dragged herself towards the sound of the guard's voice. With all the pain she had to endure, the short walk felt like she had been walking forever with no moment's rest.

"I said, I don't have all day." The guard hissed before pushing her out of the door and into the sun that had her shutting her eyes. The rough push from the guard made her brace for impact with the ground but her landing felt softer than she had anticipated. Still with eyes shut, keeping the bright light out, she rested her head on someone's chest. She didn't care who they were, but was glad they kept her from enduring another wave of pain.

"Thank you."

"Sssh...your mother is here."

Irabel pulled back and blinked several times before she was able to see the woman clearly. There was a look of regret, but also relief written on her face. And while Irabel knew her mother was not here, she still smiled and buried herself in this woman's arms, knowing she was the only one she had in this life.

"Thank you mother." She mumbled in the woman's chest as a fresh line of tears escaped her eyes.

"Hush now. Let's get you cleaned up and fed." Her mother said and Irabel nodded.

The water was cold, but after being in the cold dark cell for so long it made no difference, except for her aching shoulder and hip. Each time the cold liquid touched that skin she winced in pain.

"Here, this will help you with the pain and the cold. It will also make it easier for you to hold your meal down."

"Will you look at me mother?" Instead of reaching for the bowl of soup, Irabel held her mother's hand. She had noticed that between getting her cleaned up and having something for her to eat, the woman barely kept her eyes on her longer than a few seconds.

"I should be doing more than this…" Irabel's mother whispered. "I shouldn't be letting them hurt you like this."

The sadness in her mother's voice had Irabel choking.

"It's not your fault mother--"

"But it is." Her mother placed the bowl on a stool that was beside the metal bath tub. "I should have been stronger. I should have protected you each time they hurt you. I should have just run away. May be a life of a rogue would have been better for us, for you…"

"What are you saying mother? We both know a rogue's life is worse than a little torture--"

"You call this a little torture? Irabella, you have broken bones, God knows what else…" Her mother's eyes filled up with tears while she looked her over. "I'd never forgive myself if...if something worse happened to you."

"Nothing will happen, mother." Irabel couldn't guarantee that, but it was something her mother needed to hear, something she needed to hear too. "Now will you please pass me the bowl?"

"Sure."

"How long was I locked up for?" Irabel asked after her first spoonful of the bowl's contents. Whatever it was tasted flat, but it was hot and she believed her mother when she said the soup would do her good.

"This time was the shortest." Her mother looked away, making Irabel frown.

"And how long was the shortest time?" Irabel had lost track of time with the darkness in the cell and she had no clue how much time had passed.

"Three days…"

"Three days? No wonder I feel so hungry." Irabel groaned, making sure to hide the emotions that came with knowing that her own pack could be this cruel to its pack member.

"What is it?" Irabel stared at her mother who had a look of shock written on her face.

"You are not crying anymore. You always do that for hours when they let you go. Sometimes days."

"Oh mother…" The term still felt strange on Irabel's tongue but she smiled at the woman. "You yourself said, there is nothing we can do about my situation, so why waste more tears on things I can't change? Besides, I think I have cried enough over the past few days, don't you think?"

"It's not just that. Something is different about you. I know my daughter."

Irabel tensed, wondering if the woman had caught on to the truth she was hiding. But after a moment the woman just smiled.

"Whatever it is that happened, I'm happy it did. Because finally I can see the fighter I have always known was hidden deep inside." The woman's smile grew wider, making Irabel smile along too, thinking about how true the woman's words were.

There was someone definitely hiding inside her daughter's body, but she doubted that someone was a fighter.