Blind to love

Sorry

Callie pov

Waking up the following day I finally have a smile on my face as I received my car last night and glancing over it I know I'm going to have fun ripping it apart and building it up to sell it again, I don't need a car as I have a little run around to get me from a to b. I can't keep the car either when I restored it as its a project, what would I do with a car I have finished, restoring cars keeps the silence away and my mind rolling. Looking at the time I notice I have an email and reading the name my heart jumps knowing its from my brother. I didn't expect for him to respond but i'm glad he did as I now get to know how much he hates me right now which im hoping itsnt too much that we can't rebuild our relationship. Opening the laptop I read the email.... 

To.Callie 

from jay

Your apologies is noted and pending acceptance. Father told me he seen you and you looked worse for wear, he didn't tell me much apart from that you went to mother grave, I didn't know you still knew where that was as you never came to visit or was it you never came to visit me? I never asked much from you ever Callie and when you left without a goodbye it hurt, the first place I went when you left was to Zoey to ask if she knew anything only to be told you didn't say goodbye to her either, you didn't only hurt me but you hurt everyone. We are family so why leave the way you did? where did you even go? I have so many questions that haven't been answered for eight years. Im glad you reach out I really am but it doesn't add up for the eight years you wasn't here. I'm glad you home Callie, I missed you too. 

Reading it I didn't know how much hate he has for me and now I know as a single tear rolls down my cheek, I haven't cried since losing my fiancé, I just hate that I didn't say goodbye to him or reconnected sooner, I knew I hurt Zoey as hearing that I left from my brother couldn't of been easy for her to hear or for him to break the news. Closing my laptop I don't email him back straight away as I don't even know how I would respond, I haven't opened us to anyone and the only people know my story are nearly hundred of miles away waiting for a letter or a email from me telling them how I am but I don't even have it in me to tell them how hard it is to adjust. Walking away from my laptop I throw on a pair of ripped jeans and a jumper over my t-shirt ready to get my hands dirty, looking it over last night I'm not even sure where to start as everything needs work. Lifting the hood up I look at the engine knowing if I can get it too start it be easy from there, while the hoods up I make my way to the drivers seat turning the key to hear the sound it makes, listening to the sound I start to work taking parts away to get a good look inside, some parts have a lot fo water damage making me think what actually happened to this car but as i'm thinking about the damage I miss the sharp edge of a cut piece and rip a chuck of my skin from my finger, I thought I was more trained to miss such a first trainee move. Looking at my finger I run inside running it under the tap while I glance with my eyes for a first aid kit, knowing already I don't have one, silly move on my half. 

Wrapping a cloth around my finger I head to the shops for a first aid kit knowing ill get looks at as they see a b****y cloth leak from my finger, I didn't want everyone knowing my business but they cant unseen this I guess. Pulling into the car park I head inside searching the shop for everything that contains first aid, spotting the plasters I take two boxes while on a search for an actually bag, spotting one in the distance I knock into someone while I grab it and drop the plasters on the floor, today isn't my day. 

"i'm sorry, let me help" just hearing the voice I'm ready to dart into the other direction knowing exactly who I just bumped into by accident, I haven't even told her I was back in town. Turning around I watch her face as she changed facial expressions from happy too shocked to pure anger, well that karma for me. However her face changed once again as she spots my b****y cloth on my finger, quickly hiding it behind my back I know I was too late as she has already spotted it 

"Callie let me see the finger and then I have a bone to pick with you" I knew Zoey wouldn't leave my finger alone, out of everyone I bumped into it was Zoey, my best friend I hurt as much as my brother, at least she wants to talk but I don't think ill be doing much talking. As Zoey leads us to a flat desk in the shop she looks at my finger carefully unwrapping my finger, I have already seen it and I know it doesn't need stitches, I just need to wrap it up so I can get back to my car. Watching Zoey carefully clean and put a fresh plaster over my finger neither of us have said a word to each other, I wouldn't even know where to start, well thats a lie as I would start with sorry but it doesn't come out once again I have a dry throat. As the alcohol wipe crosses my finger I could tell Zoey was waiting for me to finch or do something but Im stood there with the same nervous face when she first pulled me over, I have been though so much physical pain I can now barely feel anything unless its a bullet tearing my skin as its enters and rips my skin as he goes though. Looking at my finger once it wraps I'm about to sat thank you but Zoey stops me 

"I didn't think ill ever see you again after you left without a goodbye but it wasn't just me who didn't get a goodbye was it, you coward. It hurt hearing the news from your brother who was hurt more when I knew nothing. I hope you're proud of yourself, can you answer this one question and tell me why?" looking at the floor then and then Zoey, she and I both know I don't have an answer for her as I don't know why well I do as if I told them I was leaving with living here there's were too many memories here and that I wanted to join the army I knew they hold me back, its better them hating me then hearing I was killed. I should off wrote to them explaining this but I just couldn't, instead I built a relationship with Jacob and his family knowing my own hated me for leaving. 

"if you can't or wont answer that question, tell me where you was for the pass eight years?" listening to her second question I could tell her I was travelling as I have pretty much been everywhere but I owe her the truth well parts of the truth and telling her I was in the army might just shock her as I don't seem like the army type, looking in her eyes I'm ready to tell her the truth of where I was only because I don't want to start lying to each other. 

"I enlisted in the army" I say as her hand lets go off my wrist and thats my chance to walk away and adjust to the information I told her, I haven't even told my brothers I enlisted but I'm sure word will get around, surely she speak to my brother, both our families was close. Making my way to check out I pay for everything and quickly exit the shop hoping Zoey doesn't follow me, I know it was rude of me to leave her like that but I couldn't answer the question she would ask next as I play with my engagement ring that sits next to my dog tags, I'm not sure why I wear either of them as they remind me of what I lost but I need that reminder. I can't, wont forget him. 

Making it home I drop my bag on the counter before heading back outside to the car that sits there barely touched as I ran to the store for first aid, with my finger wrapped I carry on where I left off, wanting to at least know why it wont start. Seeing the blood on a piece of mental I see where I cut myself and this time I'm careful removing it and while I'm moving it I spot the problem especially as the oil leaks from the engine, this is going to take a while.