I had been lucky that no one was around when I had snook back completely naked. They were still all out on the pack run. I'd run into the house and to the bathroom , turning the shower on to scorching hot. I'd climbed in and sunk myself to the bottom. Curled up in a ball , I'd pulled my knees as close to my chest as I could and I'd cried. I'd let the water wash away the streams and streams of tears I had felt pouring from my eyes.
The thing was, Enzo was not who or what I had envisioned my mate would be. I didn't want the next Alpha to be my mate. I just wanted a lower level wolf that would see past everything other people sneered at me for. And saw me, a small house and just left alone to bask in our mating and acceptance of one another. I didn't want nor craved to be in the lime light. Not like some female wolves would. Heck I'd say ninety-eight percent of the young available females are all hoping and praying they turn out to be Enzo's mate. Seen as it was obviously not common knowledge, he had found it. He'd found me.
The hatred in his eyes as he had looked at me would forever be etched into my memory. I think it hurt more than anyone's dissatisfied and mean look before, even my own mothers. I stayed in the shower long enough for my skin to turn pruned and red from the heat. And long enough to question everything I knew about the fates and the fact they are meant to match you with someone who would complete you in every way. Every book and story of them I had heard or r******w seemed false in my mind. Because there was no way , ever. That Enzo and I would be a match.
Getting out of the shower, the house was still silent. I wrapped a towel around my body and walked into my room, shutting and locking the door behind me. I caught a glimpse of myself in the mirror on my dressing table as I was passing by it and stopped in my tracks. My eyes looked raw and red. Underneath them, dark circles were standing out in stark contrast to my pale complexion. I looked terrible. I looked absolutely miserable. Biting my lip , I looked down at the towel wrapped around my body. All the females in our pack had defined feminine muscles. I'd never seen an overweight pack member. Well , the cute pudgy babies maybe, and the older members of the pack who were getting too old to train hard and shift. But even then they were really old, before their bodies softened. Shifter's life spans were a little different to ordinary humans. We didn't live forever , we weren't immortal. But we would out live most humans by maybe twenty to thirty years. The oldest member of our pack is currently one hundred and ten. But her wild spirit was fading away now , ready to be reborn, a new into a new person of shifter gene.
I had heard my mother and father talking about it. But we tend to start showing signs of aging , later too. So soft middles and graying hair didn't tend to start until the early seventies and then there was a slow decline from there. The story of our wolves says they have been the animal spirits for many shifters before us , they get called back by the moon goddess when it is time for them to be passed on and their new match has come of age.
Opening my towel, I looked at my own body in the mirror. Shorter by at least a foot of the females. I was slim , but I wasn't defined. I didn't train nearly enough to be like them. Peter was the one that actually took the time to train me , but I couldn't keep up. I'd tire before him. My breasts were of a good size , my hips and bum had a little shape. In the human world, I'd just be classed as petite and normal. My body , size, everything would be normal for my age. Some would even envy the fact I was so slim. Here I was lacking. I found it stupid. I had thoughts of running away a lot. Going to humans and just living as one of them. I would have to hide that I was a shifter. They were never to find out the secret. To them we were weird , living in the middle of nowhere. Our beauty and physical attributes scared them, so they stayed clear. And we did our best to remain off of the grid. I believed they lived with the motto" ignorance is bliss". They knew something was not right , but just left it at that.
Whilst I was studying my body, a movement at the window caught my eye, through the mirror. Without turning, I saw something in the mirror . There behind me , looking at me with his angry gaze and stern features. Stood Enzo. I gasped in shock, my heart began to pound again. How long had he been standing there ? His eyes flickered down and I looked and realized I was still holding my towel open. So I quickly wrapped it back around me. He sneered my way as our eyes locked again , and I seemed to become frozen in his glare. Unable to look away or breathe properly.
What was he doing here ? His figure stepped closer to the window and I saw his hands go to the bottom. My window was one you pulled up to open and being wolfs and the fact we was surrounded by wolfs. No one ever locks their windows or doors. My mouth opened in shock as I saw him lift it so it was open just a few inches. But then loud voices sounded throughout the house. Ones of excitement and laughter , I looked at my bedroom door. Then at the window and his figure was gone. I would ask myself about seeing things if it wasn't for the fact my window was still open a touch. My heart still hammered wildly , but I scurried to get dressed and then turned out my light and jumped under the covers.
I wouldn't be in any trouble for being awake, but I knew Peter would come in here. Asking questions about how my run went. And I didn't want to answer any , didn't want him seeing my red blotchy face and swollen eyes. Like I guessed, five minutes later I heard the door open. " Anthea ", Peter whispered. I remained silent and concentrated on evening out my breathing. I blew out a breath when he didn't come in. And the door had clicked softly back closed.
The rest of the night I fell into a not-so peaceful slumber. I woke up in fits of panic and sweaty , my heart racing and out of breath, my dreams had been me and my wolf running from a much larger one. One with teeth dripping with blood and insanity in its eyes. The fur is thick and black. My wolf demanded we go get the help of our mate. Call out to him , make him hear us. But I shut her down , time and time again. He doesn't want us , he'd rather this beast kill us, so he is rid of us. We ran and ran our white fur, not giving us any camouflage in the night sky , the moon bounced off of it basically, illuminating us.
Then there in front of us , a wolf I recognised. One with black and brown fur that was huge. It stood unmoving like there wasn't danger right behind me. We skidded to a stop and looked back. There was nothing there. No rabid wolf , no one chasing us. And when we turned back, the one we knew was gone too. We were alone in a huge clearing , not a sound could be heard from the trees or the animals of the night. That's when I'd wake up.
So, come morning, I was exhausted , after the third time of trying to fall back to sleep and having the same dream. I gave in and just laid awake looking at the dark ceiling of my room. I dragged myself out of my bed and dressed. Looking at myself in the mirror, the redness had gone , but my eyes were still dark. I looked pale too , like I was sick. Stumbling out into the kitchen, I started my duty of preparing breakfast for the family. We all had jobs to do , mine all seemed to be ones that kept me indoors and mainly chores. Mum and dad called it. We all chipped in to look after the family and the pack. My job was to keep my family fed and strong and clothes clean. So they could then go out and take care of the pack. I wasn't blind, I knew what it was. Another way to keep me out of sight.
When they all smelt the food and made their way into the kitchen, they were all in high spirits. Mum was smiling from ear to ear , dad was whistling. More so than usual. Samuel and Timothy were laughing , only Peter was the one not so happy. He had been until he had taken one look at my face. Now he looked concerned. " Was it a good run last night ?" I asked them. I dipped my head and was looking at my plate , away from Peter's gaze. And I'd ask the question as a distraction before he could ask in front of everyone if I was OK . I didn't want them all asking questions either like him , not like they probably would. Just incase.
" Samuel met his mate last night , Lorna. She had only fazed for the first time last month and she had been helping her mother with the pups at home. So she hadn't been out much.That is why the love birds hadn't crossed paths until last night on the run. We couldn't wish for a better mate for a son of ours. Lorna is from a good, highly respected family , she's strong and she's family oriented. So yes it was a very good run ", mum boasted. I looked up at Samuel, who was preening like a cat, not a wolf. He looked like he was the proudest person alive.
" We are to meet with her family today, then go declare their mating to the alpha and then they can go off and well seal the bond" mum carried on, she leant over and grabbed Samuel's hand. " The first of my boys mating and you've done this family proud, Samuel. The fates smile upon us again and it's the good news we needed as well" she glances at me. After their hopes were dashed, that my wolf would miraculously make me like everyone else and fix me. Making me stronger and taller and fixing all the damage and premature birth did, was what she left unspoken. She clears her throat and changes the subject and goes back to preparing to speak to the alpha today. It was just what us as a pack did. Before a mate bond is finished , you make the alpha aware a new pairing has been found. He couldn't stop the will of the fates or say he didn't agree, it was just a show off kind of thing, I suppose. One I wouldn't be attending as usual. Not that I wanted to today , especially after Peter followed me to the wash room after breakfast to confront me.