Tears of love

Prologue. I hear his footsteps behind me and although I don't want him to see me in this state, I can't help it because he grabs my arm and forces me to turn to him. His face is in front of me and for the first time in my life, I feel like I'm choking just having him close. How can someone you love hurt you so many times? Worse, why are you so stupid to let him? I remove my arm from his grip and take two steps away from him. I don't want him around. "You don't have to tell me anything," I murmur as I control my tears, keeping them from falling. "I... finally understood, Jeremy. No matter how hard I try, I'm not the one who makes you happy, she is. And I'll never be her, I'm done trying to fill the place you've only given her. There's no way I can fight against that" I look into his eyes, eyes that I love, but at the same time it hurts so much to look into. "I mean nothing to you and I'm tired of trying the opposite" I make a failed attempt at a smile. "Go upstairs, she's waiting for you, don't keep wasting your time with me." I wipe a pathetic tear from one of my eyes and turn around to get into my car, but his voice stops me. Still, I don't turn to look at him. "I never meant to hurt you, Aurora," he says as I do my best to stay standing without collapsing. "I was clear with you from the beginning. This is your fault, I never asked you to love me." A sob between cut, confused with laughter, comes from my lips when I hear his words. What he says is so true, he never gave me reason to think he had feelings for me. Just someone to hang out with, a distraction. I'm his dirty secret. "I know" I whisper and I don't know if he can hear me and I don't care either. I just want to get away from him and heal this wound alone. If it's the last thing I do, I have to get over him, I have to forget him. I get in the car and without looking back, I drive away from the person I love, to whom I gave everything and for whom I was left empty. Because while I gave everything, he gave me nothing.