The Alpha's Odessa

Chapter 6: Ride to School

POV: Haven

I'm sitting at the kitchen bar eating breakfast when my parents come down from their bedroom. I heard them arguing last night. I couldn't make out everything they said, but I could hear it was about me. "Good morning Goose, when did you get up?" Dad kisses the top of my head.

I may be upset with them, but they are still my parents. Everything I do is to make them proud of me. I hate fighting with them, but I need to separate myself from them. Maybe if they see I can handle myself without them, they won't treat me as an outsider anymore. "About an hour. I made coffee." I smile at him.

"How many cups have you had this morning?" Mom asks. "One," I answer, even though I've had the entire coffee pot. I just brewed another pot. Mom gives me a knowing look. "Mhm, fess up missy. How many have you really had?" Mom asks. "Five," I answer honestly this time. "That sounds more like it, my coffee monster," Mom says.

Dad chuckles and shakes his head. I might have a small coffee addiction, but it's not an issue. Jake walks through the front door. He's here early. Jake lives with his wife, Lily. I'm the only one who still lives with my mom and dad. "Hey little brat, you want a ride to school today? I have a meeting with Raphael anyway," Jake asks.

"I am not a brat! And I can drive myself to school." I say defensively. "Well, if you're driving, let me grab my helmet and bible. I don't want to die today." Jake teases. "Haha, very funny. You can drive yourself." He is so, not funny. I can drive just fine. One backs into one mailbox, and they never let you hear the end of it. I drive just fine.

"Nope, I'm taking you to school today. We need to talk." Jake gets serious. Of course, we do. Nathan reported to the wardens and they told Jake. Jake will surely try to talk me out of moving out. "If this is about yesterday, you will never get me to change my mind."

"Haven, I don't want to argue. I just want to talk. This has nothing to do with yesterday anyway. This is about how much coffee you've been drinking. I think it's time for an intervention." Jake says almost with a straight face. "Ok, you can insult me and try to change my mind but don't you dare talk about my coffee habits."

Jake laughs after struggling to keep a serious face. "Come on, let me take my baby sister to school. We never talk or hang out anymore. We can go out for lunch later. You can tell me about all your classes," Jake says. Why does he want so badly to take me to school today? Nothing special is happening.

"Fine." I drawl out. He won't stop until I say yes. "Good." Jake steals one of my slices of toast. "Hey!" I was eating that. Ugh, brothers are so annoying. I finish eating my breakfast. Then I go up to my room to grab my bag and coat.

"Let's go." I walk past Jake, going straight for his car. I need to speak with Raphael this morning, anyway. And having Jake there will be easier. Jake hops into the car and starts to drive us to the university. "So Nate, said you want to move to the dorm rooms, are you sure that's what you want?" It didn't take him long to bring that up. I knew that's what he wanted to talk about.

"You're not going to change my mind. I need to prove I'm not a kid anymore. I'm going to find a job to pay for my tuition and try to find an apartment. I'll live in my car if I have to." Living in my car is a bit of a stretch, but I need to get my point across. "You don't have to do that. Move out if you must, but you're not getting a job until you finish school." Jake sighs.

"Look, Haven, it's hard for us to see you as an adult. You're the baby. Mom and Dad were finished having kids when you came along. You're their miracle. After you were raped, we thought we failed in protecting you. We never should have left you that day. All we want is to protect you because you are so precious to us," Jake explains.

I understand his point, but that's even more reason why I need to do this. I don't want my s****l assault to define my life. I want to live. I feel like I've been locked up in a tower guarded by a dragon for so long. I want friends. I want to have fun. Maybe go to a party one day but I'd like to do it without having a panic attack.

"Then what do you suggest I do, hmm? Because I see no other options. I'm still going to be kicked out of the house on Sunday. Do you not realize how wrong that is? I feel like I'm an embarrassment to my family. I'm the weak little orphan girl who wasn't strong enough to defend herself. I'm a weak, pathetic excuse for a daughter and a sister. It seems to me no matter what I do to make you all proud of me, it is never enough." I admit in a vent. I can't do this anymore. I am so sick of pretending everything is fine.

I don't want to just let it go and push it all to the side as if it isn't an issue when it is. Jake suddenly stops the car in the middle of the road. "Hang on just a minute, who the hell told you that? We are proud of you. You've come so far. Don't you ever say that about yourself again!" Jake looks at me like I've gone mad.

"Haven, you are not weak. Look at you right now. You're sitting here fighting for your life back despite your family wanting to lock you away in order to shield you from all the dangers in the world. You are not an embarrassment to this family. It's us who should be embarrassed. We never fully recovered from that day either. What that rogue did to you was completely wrong," Jake says. He's never liked it when I talked negatively about myself.

"What's a rogue?" I ask. Jake seems to be taken off guard by my question. "Um, uh nothing. I meant, uh, bastard. Lily wanted to watch a movie tonight. The title was Rogue, uh, something. It's been on my mind this morning too. I'm sorry. The wires got crossed haha." Jake awkwardly laughs.

I look at him funny. Why is he being so weird? I shrug accepting his excuse. "You are so weird. There are cars behind us, will you drive now." I tell him, seeing cars beginning to line up behind us. "Oh, right." Jake begins to drive the car again.

"I'm still going through with it," I say. I'm moving out. There are fewer students in the winter months, so there should still be some dorm rooms left, right? "I figured, you're not one to give up so easily. For the record, none of us have ever thought any of that about you. I meant it, Haven, you are strong. You're a fighter." Jake says proudly.

"Hey, Jake, you still do that martial arts fighting stuff, right?" I ask. "Um, yeah. Why?" Jake sounds confused by my question, furrowing his eyebrows. "Well, I was thinking. I'm in college now and people are hard to avoid. Can you maybe teach me to defend myself if I ever need to?" I ask. "I don't know Haven." Jake is unsure if he should or not.

"Oh come on, wouldn't you feel safer if I could defend myself and be able to get away?" I do fear it will happen again. I've had enough dreams at night about it. I need to take action. In the five years I've been recovering, therapy is the only thing I've ever really done. My therapist isn't that great though. She just sits there and plays on her phone. I've never felt like she was listening to me. I eventually stopped going. Since then, I tried to do this on my own. Without the proper guidance, there's been a lot of trial and error. There were times it got so bad I didn't want to be in this world anymore. Raphael stopped me every single time.

"We'll see. We'll talk about it more later." Jake says. He's scared he's going to hurt me, but I think I would feel safer if I could defend myself enough to get away.