The Alpha's Odessa

Chapter 2: Class

POV: Haven

I walked into my second class of the day and walked all the way to the back of the classroom. I avoid people and attention. I like to stay as invisible as I can. I hate the pitied looks people give me around town. It's like they all know. They all generally avoid me anyway. It's safe to say I don't have many friends, if at all. There are friends and then there are friends. I'm a person that has friends that aren't friends.

It's easier that way. My second class of the day is communication. This is where we learn to speak in speeches and have fluent conversations. I'm going out for an English major. My dream job would be to be an editor. I love books. Those are my true friends.

One day I think I might like to write a book of my own, so I want to get comfortable with conversations and the right things to say. I can be a little awkward in conversations at times. I've heard most people tend to avoid this class or save it for their senior year. I'm taking it as a first year. I want to be able to talk to people. It's a shame I have to take a class to do it.

I take my laptop out ready to take notes. I like to be prepared. Many students enter the classroom and go up to the back only to stop halfway up when they see me. The town has always avoided me for some reason and I don't think it's my trauma. I've never felt like I fit in here.

Some students sit in the back but several seats away from me, which is fine because I don't like to risk touching anyone, but it would be nice to at least make a friend. A few minutes later, the professor walks in. At first, I could only see their back. He's tall. He must be six feet tall or more. I goosebumps appear on my arm suddenly. From here I can see he has dark brown hair. He looks to be very fit, though there is something familiar about him. I can't quite put my finger on it. The professor turns to the class revealing his face, and I'm surprised by who he is.

"Hello, class. Most of you already know who I am. I am Alpha..." He says, but he locks his eyes on me. He quickly looks away and clears his throat. "I mean Professor Raphael. You may know me as the dean of the school, but in this room, I am just your professor. Welcome to communication. I understand this class can be hard and awkward because communication can be difficult in life. However, it is an important skill to have. Let's start with attendance. When your name is called, please introduce yourself. This is your first lesson. Meeting someone new will require you to introduce yourself and greet them. I'd like for you all to reveal one thing about yourself when you introduce yourselves. I will go first as an example..."

"Hello, my name is Raphael. I am the dean of the university. Now Amy Anderson..." Raphael calls out the first name. She stands up, giving everyone a little wave. "Hi, I'm Amy and I just met my mate yesterday." She says. Her mate? What is that? Raphael looks at the girl with a warning look and then at me. A minute later, everyone bows their heads to him and turns to look at me. I suddenly feel self-conscious. Did I do something wrong without realizing it? "Landon Armstrong," Raphael calls.

The guy stands up. "What's up? I'm Landon and I like to party." Landon laughs. Raphael calls out a few more names going down the list before he gets to my name. "Haven Claire." I stand up nervously. "U-um hello. I-I u-um like to read... Oh, and my name is Haven." I sat back down quickly, knowing I had screwed that up. What is wrong with me stuttering out like that? "Awkward much." I heard someone say.

"We'll circle back to that. Davina Granger..." Raphael says. Great he's going to use me as an example screw up. Tears threaten to flow at the thought. Why is this so hard? I need to remember this is Raphael. He saved me. I'm safe with him, right? Maybe it's my mind that has convinced me of that. Would he really just leave it alone?

He finishes with roll calls. "OK, some of you did great. You sounded confident. Others not so much. Let's try to avoid the word um. It makes you sound unsure of yourself. Secondly, it's important to state your name first when introducing yourself." Raphael looks at me as he says this. No other student used the word nor talked the way I had. I appreciate him not calling me out for it though.

"Let's go over the syllabus. Pass it around." Raphael drops a stack of papers on a student's desk. They are passed around the classroom so that everyone gets one. He goes over it with the class. It's the same as any other syllabus. "Alright, I know it's the first day of the semester, but this isn't grade school anymore. Your first assignment is very easy. We're going to continue to play off of introducing ourselves. Everyone will give an oral telling me about yourselves. Tell me a story of something you may have done. Maybe tell me about your family and how they affect you. Perhaps you suffered a past trauma. I want to know about it. Any questions?" Raphael announces.

Several students raise their hands. "You." He points to the girl in the front row who has her hand up. "Is it just something in our lives that's happened or do we tell you our life's story?" She asks. "No, The point of this assignment is to get a look at who you are. You should tell me about something that defines that. You can tell me your favorite color all you want, but does that really tell me who you are? If you feel like you're a happy person, then tell me why you think that. If you're a shy person, then tell me why that is. Events that have happened in our lives affect each of us and mold us into who we are today. For example, I lost my wife, so I am very closed off. I throw myself into my work." Raphael explains.

I remember Melanie. She was pregnant, but something went wrong and they both died. Raphael used to avoid me before that, but not like after he lost her. Now he avoids me at all cost. I'm honestly surprised he stayed in the classroom with me here. It's crazy that I feel safe just thinking of him when he acts like that towards me. Jake told me he used to come over to the house to hang out with me. He didn't like that I was always tucked away with my nose in a book, so he'd come over and make me watch a movie with him.

He answers more questions referring to the assignment and syllabus. "OK, class is dismissed." He dismisses the class. I grab my bag and wait for everyone to leave. This is the length I go to, to avoid touching anyone or anyone touching me. Once they are all gone except for Raphael, I make my way down towards the door.

"Wait, Haven, come here," Raphael commanded. His voice has always held such command and power to it. I turn to him. "Yes?" I ask in a small voice. "I said come here." He says once more. I'm standing by the door facing him, so I walk over to him. "What?" I ask again. "How have you been?" He asks. Oh, now he wants to know how I am. I can't help the annoyance I feel at his question.

"Fine," I say. "Good, listen, I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but I think you should drop this class. This is your first year. You can take this class any time," He says. I should have known he would go this far to avoid me. "Wow, Professor Raphael, your need to avoid me is beginning to interfere with my education. I'm not dropping this class. I chose it for a reason." I argue. I will not drop this class for his sake of avoidance.

He closes his eyes, taking a few breaths. "Haven, it is not like that at all. Just drop the class. You're not ready." He says with a strained voice. "How am I not ready? I thought the point of school was so you could learn. Please tell me I don't actually have to know how to have a conversation with someone to be in this class. If so, you should add that to the list of requirements," I argue. I'm not giving in to him.

He grabs my wrist in his hand. "Damn it, Haven. Stop..." That's all I hear, before I can't hear him anymore. My heart hammers in fear. His eyes look at me angrily. No, no. Please not again. My breathing becomes shallow to the point I feel like I can't breathe. Flashes of memories of the day I was raped go through my head.

I struggle to get free of him. "Don't touch me!" I manage to scream and push away from him, only to fail in doing so. His grip is too strong. I can't focus. All I see is his face. The man who hurt me. I thought Raphael was my safety, but I was wrong. It was only in my head.

Tears flow down my face as I struggle to get free. I feel myself being shaken. Then I'm embraced into a hug, being held in strong comforting arms. A scent invades me, calming me from the memories of the past. "Shh, it's ok. I'm so, so sorry. I wasn't thinking." I hear Raphael speak soothingly to me. That's when I realized he was the one holding me in his arms.

I push away and this time he lets me. I look down at the floor, embarrassed by my panicked episode. "Are you OK? I wasn't thinking. I know you don't like to be touched." He says. "I don't and that's why I need this class. I can't function around people without that happening. I just want to be normal." I sob. I can't believe I let this happen. It's my fault. I provoked him.

"Ok, I'm sorry. I was only trying to help." He says. "Well don't. I don't need your help. I've made it just fine without you since then, so leave me alone." I storm out of his classroom. My heart aches, and I don't think it's from me but him. This is a different kind of pain though. I've never felt this kind of pain from someone. This is emotional pain. I hold my chest from the feeling. My heart feels like it will explode from the heartbreaking pain.

Raphael is in pain and I just absorbed his emotional pain. It's how this seems to work. Whenever I feel a person's pain, they don't have it anymore, so I assume I'm absorbing it and feeling it for them. This curse sucks. I wish I understood what this is. I've even wondered if I was even human. Do other beings really exist, and I'm just one of them? That's insane thinking, right? I'm such an i***t. Who even thinks that?